So, have you brought me out here to scold me about my house?," You asked as his eyes met yours, "Or Malfoy, which one?"~
4:33pm, Hogwarts courtyard.
You looked down at your shoes as you walked through the muddy grass, thankfully the rain had stopped, but with rain, brings mud, and with mud brings messes.
You grimaced at the thought of having to clean your shoes off later, and it was all thanks to Harry's brilliant idea of talking outside, rather than inside somewhere.
"Y'know, we could've just talked inside." You shrugged, voicing your opinion.
"I know, but it's kinda nice out right?" He asked, trying his best to smooth the, very obvious, awkward tension over.
"No. It's muddy, windy, and cold." You sighed, wrapping your arms around yourself.
You didn't mind the rain, you loved it actually.
You didn't even really mind the mud, you just hated cleaning said mud off of said muddy shoes.
And of course,
Any time you complained about it Harry had something smart to say,
Saying something along the lines of,
-
"So you'll go run away for literal hours outside, in the rain, and expect there to not be any mud?"
Which you'd defensively reply,
"I didn't expect anything. I honestly don't mind the mud, I just don't like cleaning it because it takes forever and gets everything else dirty in the process."
-
You didn't know why you remembered that so randomly.
You were mad at him.
Furious even.
Yet, you caught yourself smiling at the memory.
You looked up from your feet to see Harry, leaning against a wall right next to a big pretty tree that caught your eye momentarily before shifting your focus back to the boy,
He awkwardly twiddled his thumbs, obviously waiting for you to go and join him.
You took the hint, swallowing harshly as you prepared yourself for the words that were about to fall from his lips.
You already knew what this conversation was going to hold, so you decided to just go ahead and get it over with as quickly as possible,
"So, have you brought me out here to scold me about my house?," You asked as his eyes met yours, "Or Malfoy, which one?"
"What?" He asked, as an unreadable expression washed over his features.
"Harry i'm not dumb, and I know your not either, well at least I hope your not," You chuckled, trailing off for a moment, "But come on, you haven't talked to me all week, then you pull me aside at the most random time of the day, and take me outside away from my friends."
His eyebrows furrowed as the word 'friends' fell past your lips, "I just..." He thought for a moment, "What's going on Y/n?"
"What do you mean 'what's going on?'," You asked, scoffing, "I should be asking what's going on with you."
He pursed his lips, "Look i'm..I'm sorry just," He avoided your gaze, "You know what I mean Y/n, what's going on with you and Malfoy?"
So it is about him.
Of course it is.
"I knew it was about him," You sighed, "Is he really the reason you haven't spoke a single word to me all week?" You asked, to which you got no answer. "Look Harry, i'm not sure of the reason as to why it bothers you so much, but if this'll give you peace of mind or something I want you to know that me and him aren't friends, or anything of the sort even. I only hang around him because of Pansy and Blaise."
"Oh," Harry said, "But then what about potions, and the great hall, then of course there was that one night-"
As he brought that up your heart sank, did he know about that? Had he seen you?
"What night?" You asked, playing completely dumb.
He scoffed at that, not buying any of it for a second.
"Come on Y/n don't try to lie to me," He said lowly, locking eyes with you, "What would've been your first night here, up on the top story I heard Malfoy yell at someone, then I heard some girls laughing as everyone ran away, one of them sounded like you and at first I thought I was mental, but then a couple days ago I was making my way to herbology and I heard You, Blaise, Pansy, and Malfoy all laughing about it. You passed right by me and didn't even notice."
You were caught, and there was no getting out of it, I mean you had practically snitched on yourself without even knowing.
But still, you had to defend yourself, "Ok yeah but at first I was just up there with Pansy. Blaise and Malfoy came out of nowhere," You began, "And also, If you're gonna be mad about me sneaking out, you literally can't because you were also doing it."
"I'm mad that you ran from me..." He said, voice trembling a bit.
This was the worst you had ever argued with your brother and you absolutely hated it, you could tell he did too.
"Harry..I only ran because I thought you'd be mad if you saw me, I mean you weren't at the sorting ceremony so you didn't even know I was a Slytherin, then I was up there with Blaise and Malfoy, which would've caused a huge misunderstanding," You sighed, "I mean, not that It already hasn't caused one, but I don't know...I was scared."
You felt your eyes begin to water a bit, trying your best to hold back your tears, not wanting to cry in front of him.
You weren't even really too upset, just frustrated. The whole situation was so confusing, and you felt as if you going to Hogwarts only damaged you and your brothers relationship. Wanting nothing more but for it to go back to how it was.
"There was no reason for you to be scared Y/n," He said much more calmly now, "I would've never mad about you being a Slytherin if that's what you were worried about, and I'm sorry I missed the ceremony I really am, it wasn't my decision." He sighed, not failing to notice how you wouldn't look him in his eyes, knowing this meant you were about to cry, "Look Y/n, It was all a huge misunderstanding ok? I'm so sorry. I can't apologize enough, really I can't. I avoided you all week just because I thought you were friends with Malfoy, which...yeah even if you were, that doesn't give me any reason to act like that. I know that now.."
You could tell he meant every word he said, in the moment he did anyways. You knew that if you were to ever actually be friends with Malfoy that it wouldn't be this easy, but since you weren't it was ok for now.
You didn't say a single word, you just slowly moved closer and pulled him into a hug. Not knowing what else to say really. Knowing you couldn't apologize, because you didn't have anything to apologize for. Knowing you couldn't just say 'it's ok' because it wasn't. Knowing that It would still probably take a while for it to go back to normal. So you thought this was just better, this was the best you could do.
"I'm sorry," He said again, breaking you out of your thoughts, "Please don't cry."
You took in a deep breath before speaking, certain that you had your emotions under control now, "I won't.."
He smiled slightly as you spoke again, "Good because then i'd really feel terrible." He joked, trying so desperately to change the atmosphere of the conversation.
You didn't mind, you yourself wanting all of this all to be over with, "Maybe I should then."
You chuckled slightly, pulling away from the hug, finally locking eyes with your brother as you wrapped your arms around your body, it was much colder now, wanting nothing more but to be curled up next to the fire in the common room, or at least be inside, and so you wordlessly began making your way back to the castle door, he took the hint and followed close behind.
He had a dorky little half smile on his face, he almost looked as if he was going to cry earlier too, but still, he added onto the joke.
"No don't," He laughed, "That Pansy girl, your friend, she already looked as if she was gonna kill me earlier. Don't need to make it worse."
You smiled earnestly now, thinking back on what Pansy had done.
-
"No, you may not 'talk' to her!" She said, yanking your arm free from his grasp, "You haven't even attempted to talk to her all week, till now of course, but we should've kept it that way!"
"What a f-" Malfoy began snickering to Blaise as Pansy whipped her head towards the two.
"Shut it Malfoy, she's not asking for your help." She spat.
"Help? She's not asking for yours either!" Malfoy said, defending himself as Harry stood there awkwardly.
"It's fine Pansy, thank you though" You chuckled, turning to face her with a smile tugging at your lips.
"You sure?!" She asked, eyebrows pinched together as you nodded, "Ok then, fill me in later?"
"Of course" You said as she pulled you into a hug, hooking her chin over your shoulder, Secretly shooting your brother a death glare while she still could.
-
"I mean, at least I know you have someone that's got your back," He chuckled to himself, holding the door open for you, following behind as you made your way inside first, and despite the gush of cold air that was pushed inside due to the closing of the heavy door seconds later, the castle was warm, you happily welcomed that warmth, making your way down the hall.
You finally had time to tell him all about your first week as you two made your way to the great hall, you decided against going back to the common room, as much as you wanted to, you figured that everyone would've already been eating, seeing as it had gotten pretty close to dinner time.
Harry listened intently as you told the stories of you and Pansy on the train, potions class, common room pranks, basically anything and everything that had happened, everything you had been dying to tell him, all except for the ghost boy. You decided against telling him that part, not wanting to worry him. Not even really being too sure of what was going on yourself yet.
He also shared stories, very similar to yours, he shared what had happened when he missed the ceremony, causing you to laugh at all the chaos, he shared stories of how Ron would mumble about his broken wand in his sleep, stories of how hard the second year classes were. Basically anything he had also been dying to tell you.
Everything was ok, it wasn't perfect and you knew you weren't gonna let yourself forget about it. You also knew you hadn't completely forgiven him yet.
Still, this was a a start.
And After pushing through countless numbers of students you two had finally made it inside of the great hall. All the smells of the different foods laid out for dinner quickly invaded your senses.
"I'm gonna go sit," You smiled, "Talk to you later?"
He smiled back, "Of course, I promise."
And with that, it was over. You two both made your ways to your separate tables, to your separate group of friends, to your separate lives, and it was ok.
As you approached your spot at the table Pansy's eyes met yours,
"Finally!" She sighed, "I was beginning to think he killed you."
"What?!" You chuckled, swinging your legs over the bench, taking your seat next to her.
"I'm just kidding.." She giggled awkwardly, taking her spoon and drenching her mashed potatoes with the same gravy you smelt earlier.
"No she's not, she kept saying things like, 'I wonder if she's ok?'" Crabbe mocked, stuffing chicken into his mouth.
"Yeah and, 'Do you think he's mad at her?'" Malfoy joined in.
"Shut up before I fling these mashed potatoes at both of your ugly faces!" Pansy said, angling her spoon towards the both of them.
It fell silent, causing you and her to make eye contact before breaking out into a fit of laughter, quickly filling up said silence.
"Wait so, what happened with your brother?" Blaise chimed in, taking a sip of his pumpkin juice.
You grabbed a couple spoon fulls of mashed potatoes, calming your laughter before answering,
"So much," You sighed, "So surprisingly, he wasn't mad about my house, so that was good I guess-" You shrugged.
"Well yeah I mean if he was that'd just be stupid." Blaise said absentmindedly.
"Yeah but let me finish," You chuckled slightly, "He was however mad at the fact that he thought me and stupid over there were friends. He even managed to figure out that it was all of us up there on the third story that one night." You said, motioning towards Malfoy.
That's when the boy started choking on his food, dramatically pounding on his chest, causing Blaise to pound on his back as well.
"Wait what?!" The blonde boy finally asked in shock, "How?!"
He took a sip of his pumpkin juice,
"He said 'one of the girls sounded like me, then of course he heard you scream," You began, "Also I guess one day when we were talking about it in the hallway he passed us?"
"How did no one see him?" Pansy asked, trying her best not to laugh.
"I don't know!" You said, "But this is the crazy part, he wasn't even mad I was sneaking out, he was mad that I ran from him, and of course that I was up there with Malfoy."
"It's not like I was trying to be up there with you." Malfoy said defensively.
"That's what I told him but-"
"And what does he expect you to do? Not run? just stand there? Stupid.." Malfoy trailed off, taking another bite of his dinner.
"You seem more bothered by this then she does mate.." Goyal said, causing the whole table to snicker at the boy.
-
And as you ate that night your mind wandered,
the words Harry had previously said replaying in your head like an obnoxious broken record player.
Was it really that big of a deal to him who you were friends with?