When faced with the decision of what to do with your life, some might face doubt, anxiety, uncertainty, and yet, I felt none of those. If anything, I was calm.
Well, as calm as I could feel sitting outside my career counselor's office. To be honest, it wasn't an office. The school had transformed a storage space into an office. I sat outside against the wall of the short and narrow hallway that connected the offices in the office. Other than a few office staff, I hadn't seen much traffic.
I looked down at my cellphone. It was 10 am on a Saturday. I had been here since 8 am. School started in a week and a half and today was the deadline to take your Career exam. I'd finished with mine two weeks ago but couldn't meet with a counselor until today.
Yawning, I stretched. My stomach growled. I should have eaten more for breakfast. Sighing, I pulled my necklace from under my t-shirt. My ring hung from it. Just looking at it, made me smile. Maybe that is why I wasn't so nervous.
I sighed again but for a different reason. I knew what I wanted to do career-wise but love life . . . I hadn't exactly decided. Removing the ring from the chain, I examined the ring again. It was beautiful. The red rubies stood out against the black gold. I should wear it more often. So, why didn't I? I could say that it didn't match any of my outfits but that wouldn't be true.
With Micah gone, I didn't have any real reason to fear being in the spotlight. Of course, I couldn't forget being called a homewrecker or a traitor online but that news had painted me in a bad light. It's not like I couldn't avoid the public eye and still be with Alexander. Celebrities made it work. Why couldn't I?
Even now, going through all the news articles over Alexander, there hadn't been any mention of me. Mostly because they were still focused on the assassination attempt and the fact that no one had been caught. Or they had but the public didn't know. I couldn't confirm anything since I hadn't seen or spoken more than a greeting to a good night to Alexander.
From what he could tell me, he was busy with his new responsibilities. To be honest, I felt like a distraction for him. Sure, he'd never say that but I couldn't help but feel that way. Would he even come to school?
My heart lurched at the thought. I wanted to see him. I wanted to be with him.
The door to the career counselor's office opened and another senior walked out.
"Miss Borek?" came a voice from the inside.
I quickly slipped the ring on and the chain in my pocket. When I stood, I had to peel my thighs off the plastic chair. My legs tingled.
"Come in."
I walked in and closed the door behind me. The career counselor was an exhausted-looking man. Three coffee cups were stacked on top of each other. I sat down in front of the desk.
"Got your slip?"
I pulled it out of my pocket and handed it to him. He turned to his laptop and started typing.
"Psychologist, huh?"
I wasn't sure if I was meant to answer but I did.
"Human Relations too."
"Yes," I repeated.
It had been on my mind for a while. I wanted to help others through what I had gone through. My therapist had helped me a lot back then.
"Let's take a look at those scores."
For the most part, the Career Exam didn't necessarily dictate what job you should aim for. Instead, it narrowed down the possibilities to help you decide. For me, however, I already knew what I wanted to do. This meeting was more like a courtesy. Plus, my career counselor would also advise on dual credit courses I could take and sign me up for an internship as well. And he would also make sure that I was sure this is what I wanted before I wasted time on it.
Not their words but that was what they were doing.
You see, senior year was different. We still had classes to attend but only in the morning. The afternoon, would have us at our internships and taking one or two college classes that could be used for high school and college. This method also allowed you to experience what it would be like in a workplace and still change your mind.
"You'll need to take an extra course," he said. "That'll be two intro classes to get you started. As for the internship, I don't have any openings at the moment. I can put your name down on a waitlist. As soon as a spot opens up, you'll be good to go."
I sat there, trying to register what he said. Two dual-credit courses and no internships are available. Sh*t.
"So," I said wetting my lips. "Any other positions open? Like HR?"
He tapped on his laptop. "Internships are for majors only and not minors. It'll be very difficult to get you into one. Keep in mind you still have the spring and summer too if you don't find one this fall."
He wasn't wrong. Thing is, I didn't want to wait that long. But I supposed I couldn't do anything right now but wait.
"Alright," I said. "That's fine. Will I get an email when there's a spot open?"
"If you get put in a spot, you'll be notified."
I bit my lip. "Is there a way to get an internship, not in the system?"
"Yes. If you find one, let the department know and we'll take a look at it if it meets the requirements. If it does, we'll handle the paperwork and get you started."
I nodded. So, as soon as I got home, I would start searching for an internship.
"I'll send a copy of everything to your email," he said. He placed a card in front of me. "Contact me with any questions."
"Okay, thank you."
As I stepped out of the office, another senior walked in. I walked to the front area and texted my dad. He was the one fairing me around today. Come to think of it, I still needed to get my driving permit. With everything that happened, I had let some things fall through the cracks.
I loitered outside the front office unable to bring myself to sit down. My butt wouldn't forgive me. I just had to wait for ten minutes for my dad.
My phone buzzed. Looking down, I expected Dad to tell me he was stuck in traffic. But it wasn't.
I opened the message quickly.
"I'm no longer under house arrest."
I grinned. 'Can't wait to see you again,' I sent back.
Alexander sent a heart sticker.
Had it really been on my birthday the last time I had seen him? It felt like a long time. I blushed thinking about his cat outfit.
It would be good to see him again. I looked down at the ring on my finger. With everything that happened, it would be good to talk. We needed to.