It's paining , my Heart is aching but it's not a heart attack . How I wish it was !
It's paining of all the scars and unfulfilled feelings of love it has . there should be a syrup that washes away all your bad memories and unfulfilled feelings of any emotion. I want to be loved not hurt . Is it too bad to ask for ? Why is that my life is messed up since birth ?
My birth brought 100 times more pain than pleasure because I just created problems for my angelic guardian . She struggled with all the nonsense that happened around her but yet strongly she kept me safe in her shell and what did I give her in return ; more pain .
She gets angry but all her cursing , will never be enough to punish me ...I've done way too much .
She is where she is because of me . Oh how I wish I never existed !
I've hurt my friends and still they support me . Why ? Punish me and tell me how a horrible person I am .
Give me a blade or cut my vein for me . I'm sure Krishna isn't proud of me but I'm thankful for everything he's given .
I'm sorry to everyone .
I've never let my emotions come out of my heart . Be it infatuation or hurt , I've always locked it inside . I'm pretty sure my heart is swollen because of so much trapped in it .
But what I do the least is I give people strong and sweet advices so that they don't turn even a bit like me.
Never lock your emotions . It's worse than death .