[ xxii. chupacabra ]
october 31st, 2010
➸➸➸
ASTRID TRAILED AFTER DARYL through the trees and found her attention set upon how delicately the burly hunter held the pure Cherokee Rose to his chest. They soon broke through the tree line and saw the familiar giant farmhouse rising up in the distance. The sun had nearly set on the property, casting long shadows across its land.
In silence, they traversed the vast field and slipped between gaps in the barbed fences, growing nearer to civilization. All around, Astrid's group members were seeking refuge for the night, finalizing their tents in the makeshift camp. But this place held more than just temporary shelter. With Fort Benning still so far away, the Greene farm was their only sanctuary now.
As she and Daryl came onto the front lawn, the former watched from a distance as Carol disappeared inside the RV. "You should go give that to her now," she said to the hunter, pointing towards the Peletier woman's direction.
Daryl's expression was unreadable. "You comin'?" He asked her.
Astrid shook her head. "No, you go on ahead. She might appreciate it more coming from you," She said, her true fears hidden deep inside. The Lancaster woman was fearful of Carol's heartbroken gaze falling upon her, and dreaded the thought of facing the grieving mother, feeling like a constant reminder of Sophia's disappearance. "I'm going to go check on Carl and see how he's doing."
Daryl nodded mutely, and then walked off towards the RV without a farewell glance back. Astrid watched him go until he had vanished from sight into the mobile home, a wave of anxiety washing over her. How might Carol react? Would she hate the gift? Rip it up in the hunter's face?
Astrid did not want to think about it. In the dying light, she turned towards the farmhouse where Glenn and Maggie were talking on the porch's front steps. She gave Glenn a small smile as she walked past them, trying to push her concerns to the back of her mind. After all, it was nice to see that at least one in their group was attempting to branch out and connect with the Greene family.
Astrid walked through the front screen door and made her way through the foyer, and down the hallway toward the bedroom that had the most voices coming from it. Seeing the door was ajar, she slightly pushed it open, and found the Grimes family reunited. Lori and Rick were sitting at Carl's bedside as he spoke softly to them. Astrid's heart clenched at the sight of the young, bedridden boy—his entire exposed abdomen bandaged and wrapped from a bullet to the stomach—who had endured so much pain and terror already.
At the sound of her entry, Rick lifted his head, "Hey, Astrid," He greeted with a tired smile.
She nodded to both him and Lori, and then slowly made her way over to Carl's other bedside. The boy eagerly turned to look at her as Astrid settled into her seat beside his head. "How are you doing, little man?" She questioned gently.
"I'm feeling better. But it still hurts a little," Carl said, his voice weak but determined.
"I can imagine," Astrid replied. "You're one tough kid." She looked at Lori and Rick across the bed, seeing the exhaustion and worry etched on their faces. "How are you both?" She asked.
Rick scratched at the growing stubble on his pale chin, his weariness evident. "I'm exhausted," He admitted.
Lori gently rubbed her husband's shoulders, trying to offer some comfort. "You gave a lot of blood," She reminded him. "We are all tired and we should all try to get some rest. Have you had anything to eat, Astrid?"
Astrid shook her head as she immediately tried to downplay her own needs amidst the larger concerns that loomed over the group. "I'll get something later," She said. She then glanced at Rick. "We might have a new lead on Sophia," She informed.
Rick's reaction was not immediate, but Carl's response was swift. "Dad, I thought you said that you found her," The young boy accused, frowning with disappointment.
Astrid frowned in confusion and looked back at his parents. Lori no longer met her interrogating gaze and instead reached out to caress her son's cheek, whispering reassuring words into his ear as he began to softly weep. Elsewhere, Rick stood up and walked over to Astrid, gesturing for her to follow him into the hallway away from the bedside. The protests from Carl concerning Sophia's whereabouts continued in the background, even as Rick closed the door shut behind them.
Astrid crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the wall. "You told him that Sophia had been found?" She repeated.
"He had just been shot, what else could I do?" Rick countered sharply. "He asked for her when he was bleeding out. I said the one thing I thought would keep him alive. Would you have said anything different?"
The father's words hung heavily in the air. The truth was, Astrid understood Rick's desperate attempt to give his son strength and keep him alive. But would she have done the same to protect someone she cared about deeply? Would she ever lie to her own child about a topic so severe and heart-breaking, knowing it truly could be the difference between life and death? The answer was not clear-cut. In the end, Astrid supposed that it was not about whether she would have said something different, but rather about the difficult choices they all had to make in order to keep those that they loved alive.
As Astrid looked back at Rick, she saw the pain in his eyes, and she knew that he carried the weight of the regrettable choice that came with lying to his son. She did not need to add further to its load.
"No, Rick. I understand," Astrid finally replied. "You did what you had to do." She hoped her words were a reassurance to Rick, an acknowledgment of the difficult choices he faced as a leader and a father.
Rick's shoulders sagged, and he exhaled a tired breath. "What news did you have on Sophia?" He inquired, his attention shifting to the pressing matter at hand.
"Daryl and I found a house this afternoon that showed recent signs of a child hiding there. There was a little burrow of blankets in a closet and a freshly opened can of sardines that was only half-eaten. Daryl thinks that Sophia could have been there less than two days ago. If that's the case, she could still be in the surrounding area," Astrid informed. "We need to go out again tomorrow and see if we can find fresher tracks."
"We will. In the morning, we'll organize proper search units on the map. Organized regions," Rick decided. "But for now—tonight—I need to be with my son. And you need to rest. Go get something to eat."
"Will do." Astrid nodded, respecting the sheriff's decision. "Goodnight, Rick."
As Rick moved back towards the bedroom where his injured—and now grieving—son rested, he abruptly turned around to Astrid once more, catching her attention before she exited the hallway. "By the way . . . I know you took the gun," He told her. The blatant confession made the Lancaster woman's cheeks burn in embarrassment, yet Rick's tired but warm smile ultimately put her at ease. "I'm not upset with you," He reassured. "I knew it was bound to happen—and I'm glad you took it to protect yourself. Don't ever second guess your instincts. Now you have a good night."
Astrid's smile widened, touched by his understanding and support. "Thank you, Rick," She murmured gratefully before walking down the hallway and outside. The moon cast an eerie glow over the RV—and through the large vehicle's window, she could see Andrea, Carol, and Dale eating a warm dinner. Astrid crossed the still and empty yard and climbed up the steps, entering the small walkway.
"Got any more scraps?" Astrid asked eagerly as three pairs of eyes turned in her direction.
Andrea laughed and scooted over on the bench. "Have a seat," She invited.
Astrid sat down and took an offered plate. She ate in silence, appreciating the normalcy that exuded from the trio around her as they openly spoke of their lives before, remembering happier times. Then, Carol's touch brought her back to the present moment, and she looked up to see the woman smiling at her. "Thank you for the flower," She whispered. "Daryl told me it was your idea."
As Astrid absorbed the sincerity in Carol's words and the warmth in her touch, she felt a swell building within her, as if a dam that had been holding back her feelings finally broke. Astrid's eyes glistened with tears as she managed to smile, trying to express her own gratitude. The realization that Carol, perhaps, truly did not blame her for her daughter's disappearance and saw her as a valuable member of their group, contributing every morsel of her being to the search, touched her deeply.
The judgment and doubt Astrid had been carrying in the shadow of the Peletier mother slowly dissipated as Carol's gentle smile and understanding gaze gave Astrid the reassurance she needed. It was a subtle acknowledgment that her efforts were recognized and appreciated.
"We're going to find Sophia, and she's going be just fine," Astrid promised. "I'll do whatever it takes to ensure that."
Their meal continued, and Astrid caught sight of the Cherokee Rose inside a beer bottle vase on the kitchen's opposite counter—a sure touch of Daryl's unique thoughtfulness. She smiled at the gesture, knowing that even in the face of such dark times, there were moments of light and warmth to be cherished.
As Astrid, Carol, Andrea, and Dale continued to spend their evening together, even long after they had finished their meals, the Lancaster woman felt a sense of camaraderie amongst them—a feeling she had not yet felt amongst the group. But time in itself was inescapable, and after what seemed like a mere fleeting moment, Astrid knew she had to retreat to her tent to gather her strength for the long day of searching planned ahead. "I'm off to bed," Astrid announced, standing up. "Have a good night, everyone."
"Night," They called after her. Dale closed the door behind her as she walked out, and Astrid found herself alone once more under the moon's pale glow.
The moon, now her only light, cast long shadows as she made her way toward her tent. A sense of isolation settled in Astrid's bones, accentuated by the unearthly silence around the RV. She reached the tent that she now shared with Andrea when suddenly, a choked sob shattered the stillness. Astrid's instincts kicked in, and she turned to the source of the sound. Through the blackness of the night, she could see a small shadow hunched over in the bushes.
Astrid's breath was trapped in her lungs as she approached cautiously. Her eyes widened as she realized it was none other than Lori Grimes. The woman hiding in the dark held something so fragile in her trembling hands. A pregnancy test.
"Lori?" Astrid called gently, her hesitant gaze peeled on the small pink stick. Lori wiped her tear-stained cheeks, mustering the courage to speak.
"Don't tell," She pleaded.
➸➸➸
ASTRID LANCASTER WAS SWORN to secrecy regarding Lori Grimes' pregnancy. She did not like to do it, but she knew it was not her place to say otherwise. If it was not her body, it was not her choice.
However, frustration and worry still gnawed at Astrid's conscience all that next morning. She knew agreeing to keep Lori's detrimental secret was a decision that could backfire, and it troubled her deeply knowing that it most likely would. But Astrid also understood that Lori was grappling with her own fears and doubts, and she recognized the immense burden the woman now carried with daring to bring a new little life into a world so dangerous and cruel. Astrid also knew that revealing the truth on her own could lead to potential chaos within the camp, affecting not only Lori and Rick's relationship but also the overall dynamics of their entire group.
In short, Astrid would not be the one to light that candle and release that bombshell. Instead, she would simply be Lori's friend, and look out for her in the best ways she could, using the knowledge she had learned from the clinicals she had faced before in her schooling. Lori could reveal her secret in her own time.
Voices suddenly pulled Astrid from her troubled thoughts. She turned her attention to a small group gathered around the same map from the day before, planning out regions of unexplored land regarding where to search for Sophia next.
Astrid rose stiffly from her seat by the fire. She had sat there all night, unable to sleep. Now, her body was sorely regretting it, as she walked over and positioned herself between Daryl and Rick. She nodded briefly at them. "Mornin'," The sheriff greeted. The hunter merely grunted in response to her presence.
Rick returned his focus to the map spread on the hood of the vehicle, his eyes tracing the lines of the terrain they would have to scour. "We've got a lot of ground to cover today," He announced. "Everyone is getting new search grids. Astrid and Daryl found some new leads yesterday. Where was that?"
All eyes turned to Astrid, and she swallowed the lump in her throat. Gazing at the map, she pointed to a spot, her voice steady. "There was a farmhouse right about here," She explained. "We found several signs suggesting that Sophia had been hiding there."
"Then she might have gone further east than we've been so far—"
Rick was cut off by the arrival of Jimmy, Beth's boyfriend. "I'd like to help," The young man said, stepping toward their group with his hands stuffed shyly in his pockets. "I know the area pretty well. Hershel's okay with it. He just said I should ask you first."
"Welcome to the team," Andrea teased. Astrid smiled her own greeting.
"You know," Shane Walsh addressed as he traveled from the opposing side of the vehicle's hood. "Nothing about what Daryl and Astrid found screams 'Sophia' to me. Anyone could have been holed up in that farmhouse."
Astrid's response was sharp. "Well, unless you know of any other missing children wandering these woods, then it has to be Sophia," She countered.
Daryl's gruff voice cut in next, steeled and firm. "I'm goin' to borrow a horse and head up this ridge to get a bird's eye view of the whole grid," He decided, gesturing to a corner of the map. "If she's up there, I'll spot her."
"That's a good idea," T-Dog said. After receiving medical care from Hershel for his arm, he, too, was back on his feet and eager to join the search. "Maybe you'll see your Chupacabra up there too."
"Your what?" Astrid asked, eyes flickering suspiciously between the two men.
"You've never heard this story?" T-Dog returned. "Our first night in camp, Daryl tells us that the whole thing reminds him of the time he went squirrel hunting and saw a Chupacabra."
A stifled laugh escaped Jimmy's lips, but Daryl's piercing gaze immediately fell on him, causing the laughter to die in his throat. "What are you brayin' at, jackass?" The hunter snapped, his icy eyes fiery with annoyance.
"So you believe in a blood-sucking dog?" Rick wondered, a slight smirk playing on his lips.
"You believe in dead people walkin' around?" Daryl shot back.
Astrid and the other onlookers rolled their eyes at the hunter, realizing the futility of arguing over such absurdities in a world where the unimaginable—had become imaginable. Astrid could not help but feel a pang of disbelief herself. Never in her life would she have expected dead people to walk among the living, but now they were, and the rules of the old world had crumbled into oblivion. In this new life, the supernatural seemed less far-fetched than ever.
Who knows—maybe an actual Chupacabra would show up in their camp and ask to be their newest ally in the undead apocalypse.
Astrid was suddenly pulled from her crude thoughts as Jimmy reached for a shotgun atop the car's hood, but Rick swiftly intervened, yanking the weapon from his grasp. "Whoa, you ever shot one of these things?" The sheriff asked, his eyes serious and cautionary.
Jimmy scoffed, undeterred. "If I'm going out there, then I want a gun," He insisted.
Daryl chuckled at the young man's boldness. "Yeah, and people in hell want slurpees," He quipped. His gaze then shifted towards Astrid. "You with me?" He asked, his tone more inviting than it had been the day before.
Astrid opened her mouth to respond with a confirmation, but then her mouth snapped shut again abruptly. Two pressing responsibilities now pulled at her heartstrings, each vying for her undivided attention. On one side, the urgency of finding Sophia still persisted like a steady drumbeat. The thought of leaving the search effort, even for a moment, made her feel like she was failing not only the group but also Sophia herself. But on the other side was Lori, facing an emotional storm, in need of someone to lean on. Astrid could not ignore Lori's vulnerability, now that she was pregnant. Her friend needed someone she could trust, someone who would stand by her during this difficult and secretive time.
The pressure to choose descended rapidly upon her, and in the end, Astrid knew her place. "You go," She instructed Daryl. "I'm going to take Carol and drive up to the highway this afternoon. We'll check Sophia's stash—see if anything has been taken from it."
A lie.
Daryl eyed Astrid warily, seemingly towering down upon her with his rugged presence. He made a quiet noise in the back of his throat, as if unconvinced by her answer, likely sensing that something was not fully disclosed. "Alright then," He conceded, a hint of suspicion lingering, before he turned and stalked off towards the Greene family's stables.
As Daryl retreated, Astrid watched him go, but made no move to follow. The Lancaster woman felt a mix of relief and guilt swirling within her. She knew that the hunter had been able to tell that something was off, that there was more to her decision than she was letting on. But Astrid had made her choice, and she would stand by it, regardless of the consequences if the hunter chose to pry. Her heart ached for Sophia, and yet, she could not turn her back on Lori, not when she needed her most.
After realizing she was no longer needed in the planning session, Astrid pushed off from the car and returned towards the center of camp. Her thoughts were a turbulent whirlwind, but she sufficed to keep herself busy in the long day ahead.
As the afternoon approached, Astrid emerged from her tent, now dressed in new and clean clothing, ready to face the tasks that the camp offered. It was not long before Carol came over, carrying a bucket full of vegetables, and invited her to help prepare a grand dinner to be served later that evening. Despite her lack of culinary expertise, Astrid could not refuse Carol's gesture—not when they were planning to show their gratitude to Hershel and his family.
Astrid followed Carol into the house, where Lori was already busy cooking something on the stove. Astrid's eyes met the woman's weak smile, and her focus then involuntarily drifted to her stomach. Astrid quickly averted her gaze, focusing instead on Carol's instructions on what needed to be done.
As the hours passed, Astrid's hands began to feel raw and tired from the labor, and she knew she had reached her limit. Wiping off her hands, she excused herself from the kitchen. Carol thanked Astrid for the help, as she slipped out the front door, and was greeted by the fiery, early hues of the setting sun.
Astrid noticed Glenn and Maggie talking in the distance, but her attention was preoccupied with Andrea, T-Dog, and Jimmy, who had just returned from the woods. They were all empty-handed.
"No signs of her?" Astrid asked as she reached them.
Andrea shook her head sadly. "No. But at least we know, so we can cross that part off the map," She said. "Maybe the others had better luck."
Astrid's nod was stiff as she replied, "I hope so." Deep down, she longed for the reunion of Sophia with her mother, but the odds seemed to grow bleaker with each passing moment. She tried to ignore it.
"I'm going to go keep watch," Andrea soon decided. Astrid watched as she walked over to Dale, and all but pulled his own rifle from his arms. "Is that all right, Dale?" She asked sharply. The elder man did not respond to her seemingly cold-cut question, and instead stepped back, his expression dark.
As Andrea proceeded to make her way to the roof of the RV, taking the stolen rifle with her, Astrid followed, her own curiosity unable to be quelled. She sensed something lingering between Andrea and Dale, an unspoken tension that had danced in the air since the fall of the CDC. "Is there something going on between you and Dale?" Astrid asked cautiously, trying not to intrude but unable to ignore the unspoken hostility.
Andrea's eyes briefly met hers before darting away, and her muttered "It's nothing" response only fueled Astrid's suspicion that there was more to the story than she was letting on. Still, Astrid decided not to pry further, respecting her friend's privacy. She changed the subject completely. "Do you even know how to use that thing?" She asked, smirking as she gestured to the rifle.
Andrea chuckled dryly. "How hard can it be?" She challenged.
Astrid's smile grew at the tease, but as her attention shifted back to the approaching figures of Rick and Shane, their own returns marked without Sophia by their sides, her joy faded completely. As they passed by, Rick's smile offered a glimmer of reassurance, but Astrid did not feel it.
Suddenly, Andrea's voice broke through the silence over her unsuspecting head, a mixture of surprise and alarm as she cried, "Walker! There's a walker!"
Andrea pointed in the distance, and Astrid spun around to see a lone walker emerging from the trees from across the fields. The sight sent a shiver down her spine. It was only a matter of time before the dead found them here.
Rick returned to Astrid's side near the RV. "Just one?" He asked up to Andrea.
"Yeah," She answered, staring down the rifle's scope. "I bet I can nail him from here."
"No, Andrea. Put the gun down!" Rick ordered.
"You best let us handle this," Shane advised as he stepped forward, armed with an ax. T-Dog wielded a baseball bat beside him. The tension in the air was thick, the situation precarious, but Andrea seemed ready to take matters into her own hands.
Astrid's heart pounded in her chest as she reached for her gun, her instincts telling her to join. But before she could unholster and act, Rick's firm grip clamped down on her arm. "Shane, hold up. Hershel wants to deal with the walkers," He informed.
Confusion clouded Astrid's face as she questioned the decision, "What for? We can handle it."
Rick cursed inwardly, knowing that the Lancaster woman was right, as Shane and T-Dog took off into the field. The sheriff ripped his revolver free. "Astrid, c'mon!" He yelled, the urgency in his voice clear as he raced after the two men.
"Andrea, hold your fire!" Astrid called over her shoulder before she broke into a sprint.
Glenn joined her, running at her side as they closed the distance through the open field. She gripped her gun tightly, adrenaline surging through her veins. But as they approached, Shane unexpectedly stepped in front of Astrid, blocking her view of the walker. "What the hell?" She asked, annoyance and anxiety evident in her tone as she pushed against Shane's chest. "Let go of me!"
Shoving past him, Astrid turned her attention to Rick, who had his gun aimed at the stumbling walker. "Astrid . . ." He whispered, trailing off hesitantly.
Astrid did not understand the men's sudden unease until she finally saw the walker's face. Her green eyes immediately filled with tears, and she gasped in disbelief. "Daryl?!" She cried.
Blood dripped from Daryl's chin and down into his shirt, his entire body covered in sweat and dirt. Astrid examined his chest closely and noticed the grotesque necklace made of fleshy human ears adorning his neck. His waist and arms were bleeding heavily, and he clung weakly to the crossbow he dragged behind him. The dazed-looking hunter stared at all of them until his blue and bloodshot eyes finally locked solely on Rick.
"That's the third time you've pointed that thing at my head. You goin' to pull the trigger or what?"
The weight of the moment hung heavy in the air. Astrid, Rick, Shane, T-Dog, and Glenn were all frozen, grappling with the impossible truth that Daryl was not a walker, but alive and speaking to them. A mix of relief and joy surged within Astrid, and she could not hold back the laugh that escaped her lips. She pushed Rick's arm down and, before she was even rightfully aware of what she was doing, she started towards Daryl, her heart aching to embrace him, to confirm that he was real, that he had survived.
Astrid's arms went up, ready to wrap around his neck, to pull him into a fierce hug, but before she could reach him, a gunshot echoed through the air from behind them, slicing through the silence like an executing blade.
And then, without even a cry of pain, Daryl Dixon fell away from Astrid and dropped down into the tall grass without a sound.
~~~~~~~~~~