Lunch had been a quiet affair so far.
None of my friends had spoken much, whether it was to me or to each other.
It wouldn't even have bothered me that much if I hadn't noticed how their animated conversations had died down pretty much the second Nolan and I settled down at the table.
The only thing that could possibly have been bothering them was what they'd been pestering me about this entire week.
Melissa and Derek had a brief exchange wherein they complained about their homework overload, and that was it. Ashley had just been eating her lunch without making any comments.
In fact, the thick silence hanging over our table was so suffocating, it was choking the appetite out of me. Unable to swallow another bite, I picked at my half-eaten meatloaf. It wasn't that good, anyway.
Nolan, who had been flipping through his history notes, paused to eye my lunch tray.
"Not hungry?" he asked.
"Nope," I said glumly. "Don't feel like eating."
A look of concern flashed across Ashley's face as she glanced up at me, but I avoided making eye contact with her.
"And whose fault do you think it is?" I heard Melissa mumble into her soup.
Stunned, I lifted my head up to goggle at her.
"Excuse me? Whose fault is it?" I snapped. "What are you trying to imply?"
"What?" she said, meeting my glare head-on. "Am I wrong? Nobody's in the mood to talk, and you know it's because of—" The second her eyes darted to Nolan, I jumped to my feet and cut her off.
"It's not Nolan's fault!" I was really riled up now. "In fact, it's your fault that I have no appetite!"
I couldn't believe what I'd just done.
It was the first time I'd ever raised my voice around my friends, and everyone at the table was openly staring at me now.
Melissa looked floored, but I couldn't take it back.
It was one thing to complain about Nolan's behavior to me, but it was another matter altogether to blame him for their own actions. They were the ones who had made the decision to be all gloomy because they suddenly decided they didn't want him here.
They hadn't even communicated with me on this before lunch period.
If I'd known it would turn out like this, I would've gone to the library with Nolan instead.
"Wait," Nolan said, his eyebrows furrowed. "What's my fault?"
Before Melissa could jump in and answer him, I said, "Nothing. I already said it's not your fault. Come on, Nolan, let's go. I don't feel like eating anymore."
Of course, Melissa spoke up anyway. "How is it our fault that you've lost your appetite? He's the one who won't spend more than a few hours with you in any given week. Your schedule basically revolves around his now, and you expect us to just stand back and say nothing?"
Nolan turned to her. "Wait. What?"
I scoffed. "Say nothing? You haven't just been saying things, you've been grilling me nonstop about the supposed warning signs in our relationship!"
"Okay," Ashley said, "can we please talk this out nicely?"
I turned my furious stare on her. "Did you even hear how passive-aggressive she sounded just now? That was so obviously targeted at Nolan."
Nolan scrutinized everyone's faces. "Targeted at me? Why?"
"Nothing. Can we please go now?" I grabbed his hand and started pulling him away from the table.
I managed to get him to take a step before he refused to budge. I tried my hardest to tug him away, but he didn't move an inch.
"Nolan," I said.
"No," he said. "I want to hear what's going on."
I couldn't even look at him. I couldn't bear to see the expression on his face.
It had taken him months to get to this stage where he was officially a part of my friendship group. Now that we were together, my friends had certain expectations of him as my boyfriend which he couldn't meet, and the more I defended him, the more they seemed to see a problem with our relationship.
I didn't want this matter to aggravate his insecurities any further.
Nolan had enough worries about the potential issues we could face—and the ones we already were facing—as a couple. If he found out what my friends were saying about him, it would give him more pressure than what he was already giving himself.
"No, you really don't," I said. "It's not important."
"Chelsea, please." He squeezed my hand, and I looked pleadingly at him.
"We've been asking Chelsea why you two barely meet up," Derek said. "She keeps brushing us off and saying that you're busy, but it doesn't add up, so we've been trying to get her to see reason."
Ashley looked troubled as she studied my face, but she said, without taking her eyes off me, "You used to study with us after school, but after you and Chelsea started dating, you rarely ever show up."
That was because I finally understood how much he needed his sleep during the day, and I'd insisted that he didn't come unless I really had something I needed his help with.
"Which, in itself, isn't a big deal," Melissa added. "It's just studying. But you haven't gone out with Chelsea even once. What kind of couple doesn't go out on dates? She keeps saying she doesn't mind, but no girl wouldn't be bothered by the fact that their boyfriend won't even take her out once."
If I hadn't known about Nolan being unable to step out into the sunlight, I probably wouldn't have been as understanding about it as I was, that was true. But being aware of that made it impossible for me to care that we couldn't go out on 'regular' dates.
I knew that he really cared about me regardless of his limitations, and that was the important part.
"Well, I don't mind," I said. "I don't understand why you won't believe me."
"It's not that we don't believe you," Ashley said. "It's not even about him taking you out! It's more to do with the fact that you're ... going along with him for everything, and—ugh, this really isn't something I wanted to say in front of him—it feels like you aren't his priority, even though he's yours."
I wanted to shout at them that it wasn't true. I wanted to tell them that he'd been sacrificing his sleep to spend time with me all this while, and he was doing it right now in order to join me at our lunch table.
I hated how I didn't dare to say a thing in case I leaked Nolan's secret in the heat of the moment.
I watched the scene rapidly unfold in front of me, helpless to do anything.
"Yeah, what are you so busy with on the weekends?" Derek asked, directing the question at Nolan. "I don't get it."
"Don't mess around with my best friend, Nolan. I mean it." I'd never seen Melissa look this serious before. "I'll make you regret it if you hurt her."
My entire body tensed.
"Leave him alone," I said through gritted teeth. "I already told you that I'm okay with it. I'm the one with him, not you—"
"Hey," Nolan said, pulling me gently towards him. "It's okay. They're just concerned about you. If I were them, I would be too. I figured this would come up eventually, anyway. It was only a matter of time."
He met my fretful stare with a small smile before facing the others.
"I should have said this earlier, but I can't go out in the sunlight. My skin has really severe reactions to it, so I generally don't leave school in the day," he said.
I blinked. I hadn't thought of saying that. It was technically true, too. He couldn't tell them everything, but this was a good compromise.
Ashley looked slightly confused. "Oh ... like photosensitivity?"
"Kind of," he said. "It's not that I don't want to hang out with you guys or Chelsea, but I can't do it while the sun is up."
"Photosensitivity is when you're allergic to sunlight, right?" Melissa asked.
"I mean, it's more like 'sensitive' rather than allergic, but basically," Ashley said. "Is that why you're always wearing a hoodie? I don't think I've ever seen you not wear it, even on hot days."
"Yeah," Nolan said. "It alleviates some of the effects, but not all of it. My skin gets damaged fast even through clothes. I can go out in the evenings, but then that means I can only spend a few hours outside before coming back to school. That's why I never went out with you guys on weekends. I don't want you to get the wrong idea—I'm serious about Chelsea."
The wariness in my friends' gazes dissipated as he spoke.
"You could've just joined us in the evenings," Derek said.
"I didn't tell you guys before because, well, it's not really something I want everyone to know about. I knew it would seem weird if I only went out in the evenings, so I decided that I simply wouldn't go out at all. I didn't think about how others would view it." He added, "And I did play basketball with you guys whenever you played in the evenings."
"I'm sorry," Melissa said, her voice filled with guilt. "I kept pressing Chelsea on it, too. I really thought—I'm sorry for accusing you, Nolan. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions."
Ashley turned to me. "You knew, didn't you? That's why you kept reassuring us that everything was fine between you and him," Ashley said.
"Yeah," I admitted.
Nolan ran his free hand through his hair. "I can really only go out in the evenings. If you guys are okay with that, I'd love to join you."
"Of course we're okay with that," Derek said. "I'm sorry for making assumptions."
Ashley bit her lip. "Me too. I should've just listened to Chelsea. I'm sorry to you too, Chelsea."
"Nah," Nolan said, shaking his head. "I understand why you felt that way. You didn't know about my situation, and I didn't explain either. Actually, this shows how much you guys care for Chelsea. I really appreciate it."
We all gawked at him.
He was being so easygoing about the whole thing, as if everyone hadn't just been accusing him of being a horrible boyfriend a few minutes earlier.
After a couple of seconds, Ashley said, "Wow. Chelsea really found a keeper."
"For real," Melissa said. "Hold on to him, Chels."
Heat crept through my cheeks. "I was already planning on doing that!"
Grinning, Nolan cocked an eyebrow at me. "Good."
I nudged him in the side with our entwined hands.
"Are you feeling better now?" he asked me, releasing my hand.
Relief washed through me, reviving my dead appetite. "I really am. I think I can finish my lunch now."
As I sat back down, Melissa looked up at me with remorseful eyes. "I'm sorry, Chels. I was totally out of line making that remark like that. I was so upset, I stopped considering how you'd feel."
My anger was already ebbing away.
I gave her a reluctant smile. "I know that you were just looking out for me. I love you guys for caring so much about me, but I wish you had listened when I told you I was alright."
Shamefaced, she said, "I wish I had too. I shouldn't have forced my own opinion on you. Sorry."
"It's okay," I said.
"I'll definitely listen to you next time."
"Thanks. I shouldn't have brushed off your concerns the way I did, either. I'll talk it out with you if something like this ever happens again," I said.
"Okay."
With that resolved, I began to finish the rest of my uneaten meatloaf.
I met Ashley's gaze halfway through, and she smiled sheepishly at me. I smiled back at her.
The heaviness in my heart was finally gone.
After Nolan and I parted ways with them to head to our next class, I asked him, "Are you okay? I'm so sorry my friends were giving you a hard time."
"Yeah, I'm okay. Don't worry about it," he said. "I saw it coming when we first got together—it was bound to happen. People are going to think it's strange how we rarely meet up. Since I'm the one always rejecting invitations, they'd definitely see me as the problem."
"They would be the ones who have the problem then, not you."
"I'm prepared for it, anyway. You know, you have really great friends. They were willing to risk your anger to make sure that I was treating you right."
I paused. "Yeah, I know. I'm thankful for them, even though they can be stubborn sometimes."
"I'm only glad I could clear things up with them," he said. "I hate seeing you look so troubled."
"Thank you." I gave him a grateful smile. "You could've gotten mad at them, and nobody could've blamed you for it, but you didn't. You even gave them an explanation. You're so nice to me."
Amusement was written all over his face. "Well, it only makes sense that I'm nice to you. I love you."
The huge wave of shyness that had suddenly overcome me made it impossible to speak at a normal volume, so I whispered my next words instead. "I love you too."
We were now a few steps away from our chemistry classroom's open doorway. I strode towards it, but promptly found my path blocked by Nolan.
"Wait," he said, taking my hand and pulling me a few feet away from it.
"Huh?"
He glanced around and then bent down to quickly kiss my forehead. My heartbeat sped up, the traitor.
"We're in the hallway!" I whispered, scanning our surroundings to check if anyone saw.
He grinned in response, his green eyes playful and soft. "No one's looking. I wanted to kiss you before class. Let's go in now."
Distantly aware of the silly smile his action had just placed on my face, I let him lead me into the classroom.
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AN: i'm glad that part's finally over. chelsea's friends were stressing me out too, haha...anyway, thank you for reading!!! wow, i managed to finish this within a week. i'm amazed by all the support i've received--thank you for all your votes, it means so much to me! have a great week and take care, everyone! LOVE YOU ALL٩(๑ơలơ)۶♡
edited to add: i just saw, rank #49 in teenfiction?! that's wild ToT i'm so thankful!