After the confrontation at the bar, none of us felt like staying, me least of all. We decided to head to that same beach Alexander had brought me to a couple weeks earlier. It looked exactly the same but it felt like I was seeing it with renewed vision.
I couldn't believe what I'd said to Heather. It was exactly what I'd said to her a million times over in my deepest, darkest moments. It was exactly what I'd always wished I was strong enough to say to her. I took so much pleasure in the look of pure astonishment on her face.
I was glad that Stacey knew about her boyfriend as well. Stacey was selfish to the core, but didn't deserve to be with a cheater. A cheater, who ironically, was Aaron's best friend. I wondered who would stay in that small group of four now. I guess that bar was now no longer an Olivia friendly establishment either.
I was currently sitting on the sand next to Avery. I looked to my side where Alexander and Nathan were attempting to build a bon fire.
"Did you see Heather's face?" Avery laughed. She'd been mentioning it since it happened over and over again. I think the shock of what I'd said hadn't worn off. "I don't think I've ever seen her look so shocked in my life. Even after that model who she basically stalked for a month turned her down."
I laughed along with her. Heather had serious issues with her dad. He was never home and never gave her encouragement of any kind. She'd be a classic case of 'daddy issues', making up for it with sleeping with other people's boyfriends to prove to herself she was wanted by men.
I remember going shopping together once and her spending thousands of dollars on completely useless crap, buying sizes that she didn't even fit into just so her dad would notice and call her about the bill. He didn't. It was sad really. But that didn't excuse her behaviour, especially to someone who used to be her friend.
"You have to rub the two sticks together," Nathan exclaimed.
"Bro, you want to get in here?" Alexander replied frustratedly.
Nathan ignored him, "You're not doing it right."
"I didn't realize there was more than one way to rub two goddamn sticks together." Alexander threw a stick at him.
"Great. Now we gotta find new sticks," Avery sighed.
"Blame your boyfriend," Alexander muttered standing up.
Avery chuckled, "Don't worry, I always do."
"Babe!" Nathan complained.
"We need Bryan," Alexander confirmed pulling his phone out from his back pocket, "He knows this shit backwards and forwards." He texted quickly before sliding the phone into his pocket.
Avery walked towards Nathan and snuggled next to him before Alexander walked over to me and sat down so our arms were just barely brushing against each other. My cheeks flushed from the contact.
"You doing okay?" He asked quietly.
I nodded at him, "I feel great, actually."
"You know that was pretty amazing right?" He asked me.
I turned to smile at him, "It was wasn't it? It felt amazing."
He sighed dramatically looking away from me and I gazed over at him, "What is it?" I asked laughing.
"Well, what are you going to need me for if you're going around yelling at people in public bars?"
I nudged his side with my elbow, "I did no such thing."
"It was practically a brawl," he stated teasingly.
I reached for his hand and interlaced my fingers with his. I don't think Alexander would ever understand what he had done for me in the short span of time I'd known him. Words couldn't express how grateful I was for his help.
"I hope you know that I could never have done that with you. Thank you, Alexander." I explained honestly peeking at his expression.
He smiled at me, his eyes crinkling in the corners in that way that I had gotten so used to but still made my stomach feel knotted. Without letting go of my hand, he reached over my shoulders and pulled me into his side. Our interlaced fingers at my shoulder as he held on tightly. He was so warm and had that smell that I'd grown to love. I'd never felt safer.
"That was all you, Olivia. You've been that amazing since the first moment I met you."
"When I fell on you?" A grin made its way onto my face and I couldn't stop the stupid smile. I rested my head on his side.
"When you fell on me," he confirmed. "I knew I had to get to know you from that moment."
I was speechless for a moment. It was so sudden that I completely forgot about us just being friends in that moment. I had to finally admit to myself that I really liked Alexander. Was I ready to let myself be that vulnerable with someone again? Fears and doubts flitted through my mind before I shoved them aside. You are in control of your feelings, Olivia. But even I knew I didn't know what I was ready for.
A few moments later, a motorcycle rev sounded.
"That's Bryan," Alexander confirmed as Bryan walked around the corner slowly, taking his time. He was wearing a grey t-shirt and grey sweatpants and had the same far off look he had the last time I saw him. I dropped my hand from Alexander's to wave at Bryan, but Alexander kept his arm securely wrapped around my shoulder.
"Hey man," Nathan called.
Bryan gave a quick nod, "Hey," he replied so quietly that I didn't know if it was him who had spoken.
"You're the only one with expertise in this field." Alexander piped in.
"You're building a fire with two sticks," Bryan trailed looking at our sad attempt of a bon fire.
"I told you we needed logs!" Nathan hurled at Alexander.
"What am I a fucking lapdog? Get off your ass and find it yourself." Alexander snapped back playfully.
"You need twigs," Bryan stated wandering off to find some.
"I guess I should find a goddamn log." Alexander sighed dropping his arm and standing up. "You're doing nothing, I'm assuming?" He asked nodding his head at Nathan.
"Nothing other than sitting with my girl," he grinned lazily. Avery was sitting in between Nathan's legs as he had his arms wrapped around her. She looked like she was dozing off. Extreme anger made her tired, poor girl.
I got up off the sand, "I think I saw some twigs at that end of the beach last time." I said as I walked towards where Bryan had left us.
I looked for the bush that I had spotted the last time I was here with Alexander and found Bryan already grabbing the twigs from behind it. He looked up as he heard me approach.
"Oh, sorry. I didn't know if you'd find them." I bent down next to him and began to collect the twigs myself.
"You have to grab the dry ones," Bryan said in that perpetual soft tone. He snapped one in half easily showing me the pieces, "See?"
I nodded breaking one in half and demonstrating it to Bryan. "That's a good one," he responded.
"Thanks for coming out here." I told him, "I hope it wasn't a bother."
"It's a nice night and I was riding anyway," he shrugged.
We finished collecting the twigs in silence and walked back to the fire to see Alexander throwing in a couple logs. He walked over to me to grab the bundle I was carrying and I smiled gratefully.
Nathan eagerly jumped up, "I found twigs, guys!" He exclaimed holding up what looked like a branch he'd just ripped off of a trunk over his head, like a victory trophy.
"That's not dry enough," I let him know just as Bryan had opened his mouth.
He shot me a look, "She's right." He shrugged
Nathan sulked back to his spot beside Avery who had fallen asleep completely on the sand. Nathan had draped his hoodie over her shoulders. She murmured something about "liking his stick," in a voice that sounded half dead.
Bryan expertly began to get the fire started as Alexander and I sat next to each other on the beach.
"How's your building design going?" I asked Alexander as I played with the sand between my fingers.
"The client really loves it," He shrugged.
"That's great, isn't it?"
He smiled at me, "It is. I guess I just don't know if it's really what I want to go into - it's a bit late for that realization, I know."
"It's never too late," I confessed. A few months ago I would never have imagined moving into my own apartment and not accepting a proposal from Aaron. Well, a proposal through my mother anyway. "My point is, that if it's not what you can imagine yourself doing day in and day out, maybe it isn't meant to be."
He nudged me, "I'm sorry, which school did you receive your doctorate from? I believe I'm the only licensed one here."