Russia was really freaking sad so he drank all the alcohol in his house including some vodka he stole from Ukraine who got mad and killed Russia with his awesomeness but then Belarus came in and revived Russia in the name of the father and the son and the holy spirit because she has some brain cells left and was civilised as f u c c.
Then the Russian man from
Moskau, Moskau
Wirf die Gläser an die Wand
Russland ist ein schönes Land
Ho ho ho ho ho, hey
Moskau, Moskau
Deine Seele ist so groß
Nachts da ist der Teufel los
Ha ha ha ha ha, hey
I mean the Russian man from Moscow I don't know where that came from yeah he ran out of alcohol but then he didn't want to go to the shop to buy more vodka and alcohol and shit because of course he was saving up money to buy 500kg of caviar of course did you not know that what.
So he looked through his house for more alcohol and he found alcohol but it was one of those tiny little bottles next to a stack of masks. But Russia was drunk so he wore a mask and taped it to his face because he don't have ears all countryhumans don't have ears duhhh and then he took his bayonet and cut a hole in his mounts before standing upside down on his head and chugging the tiny bottle of alcohol.
The alcohol smelled sweet and funny and it was bitterly sharp on his tongue but he drunk so much it didn't bother him anymore and he like it because it's some very interesting flavour so he checked the label which said "hand sanitizer kills 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of germs and bacteria" but maybe he had eyesight problems or was seeing double triple because he drank so much because there wasn't so many 9s on the bottle but who cares right.
Then he said to Kazakhstan can we get more of this good shit in the future. It tastes so good and delicious mmmmm. And Kazakhstan, the poor soul he is, looked at his older brother and was pretty friccin briccin traumatised so he said "why did you drink the sanitizer?" And Russia looked at him and said "do you mean we can't drink this? Man it tasted so good"
Kazakhstan shook his head slowly and stammered "n-no" and Russia just muttered "пиздец" and died.
Not even Belarus could save him this time.
The end 🤠✌️