Edited: 04.16.2022
Song: crush culture - Conan Grey (slow + reverb)
𝔚𝔚𝔚
Giana
Alessio drives me to school that next morning and I'm thoroughly surprised, yet I'm definitely not complaining.
I don't know what made him change his mind, but I can't help the rush of excitement at the fact that he might actually be warming up to me.
I still can't get a good read on him, nor have I ever caught him glancing at me with any desire or interest. And I briefly wonder if it's because I'm not his type or if I'm not attractive enough.
The little bits of attention I've received from him are all relatively polite and all the affection is initiated by me.
He has yet to show any signs of liking me.
"I'm relatively attractive right?" I question out loud playing with the fries on my lunch tray.
"Fishing for compliments and it's only what...." Jacob checks his phone. "Noon?" He sends me a sarcastic smile from across the lunch table.
Picking up a fry I flick it at the idiots forehead, it drops to the ground but he picks it up and slips it into his mouth anyways.
"Gross." Lily and I both scrunch up our faces.
Lily is sat next to Jacob and she turns to me with an eye roll. "To answer your question. Yes. Extremely." She emphasizes.
I sigh and shake my head. "Not to women. Through the women's gaze, yes, I am attractive but I'm talking about through the male gaze." I reply seriously, needing to figure this out.
I never stopped to question the fact that I might not be as attractive as I always thought myself to be. Was it because all the men that flattered me seemed to be under my league and Alessio was out of it?
Jacob purses his lips and leans back in his chair crossing his arms and looking at me in thought. "Well you got a big ass, nice big tits, small waist, childlike face with fuck me eyes. You're extremely fuckable... So yes. I would say you're attractive -looking at it through the male gaze." He observes.
Ignoring the disturbing fact that men tend find childlike features attractive I purse my lips.
Perhaps Alessio was simply too out of my league for he didn't even remotely look at me with any sort of attraction or lust.
"Why the need for male validation or approval? Gia you're not an insecure girl. What's wrong?" Lily observes, studying me and I sigh knowing she's right.
Within the short time of knowing Alessio, he has made me extremely insecure - something I vowed to never let anyone let alone a man do.
"Shes just bummed cause her new daddy won't fuck her." Jacob chimes in, shrugging off the glare I send his way. "What? It's true."
"Fuck off, it's not like that." I spit back.
"Are you sure you're not only interested because you know you can't have him?" Lily says, ignoring Jacob-something we've learned is a must with being around the idiot.
"That's what I thought it was about at first. but now, I don't know..." I mumble, " I think I might actually... have... a crush on him." I cringe, the word tasting foreign on my tongue.
My friends laugh and start teasing me and before I know it, I'm growing annoyed with them and find myself storming out of the cafeteria and towards the literature department, where I know i'll be constantly wanted and desired.
. . .
Alessio picks me up from school which is why I have to cut William and I's hangout's short.
The other day when he surprised me by picking me up, I nearly kissed William goodbye for I was feeling bad about leaving him with another set of blue balls. Of course ,William was understanding but I could tell he was disappointed.
But it's not like I was planning to do anything with him anyways. Maybe he was hoping for me to slip my hand in his pants, something i've only tried once. But that didn't go so well, it was at a school assembly and we were sitting next to each other in the dark. I was curious, needing it for educational purposes. But the second I slipped my hand in and felt around, I bitched out and pulled away.
I knew Alessio was suspicious of William, since I'd noticed him glaring at the man a little too long in what I hoped was jealousy but I knew was his perceptive nature.
He was always so perceptive, cool and calculating. And today was no different.
He stands outside a black sports car, one I knew had the option for the roof to come off and I smile at the thought of riding with Alessio past the beach, with my hair in the wind as I blast my favorite song.
I hurry down the steps, pushing past the groups of girls standing around and ignore the way they all eye Alessio who was a sight for sore eyes, in a signature white button up, and black slacks.
His white dress shirt clung to his broad frame, with a few buttons loose at the top, showcasing a gold chain that rested against his chest. I trace over his lean muscular figure with my eyes appreciatively, wishing for the day I won't be restricted to sneaking glancing at him, like the rest of the senior girls in my grade we're currently doing.
They could all look, but the man was mine.
"Hey." Alessio doesn't look up from his phone as I near, he merely opens the passenger door for me, mumbling out a hello, before rounding the car and getting into the drivers side.
The car turns on with a roar, and I do up my seatbelt, before remembering that I did in fact have something to talk to him about. "Oh, my friends invited me out this Friday so I might not be home till a little late."
I barely get to finish my sentence before he's responding with a curt, nonchalant "No."
I pause and look up towards him, "I wasn't asking permission. I was letting you know." I inform him.
He stares ahead and his brows furrow, like the idea of someone not asking his permission was ridiculous.
I ignore his arrogance.
"I cannot have you leaving the house Friday night. I'm having some business associates over and I need you in the safety of your room all night." He replies swiftly.
I frown at the restriction. I'd never had to deal with something like this nor did I know what I needed to be kept safe from, but I had a good idea that these business associates weren't your conventional white collar businessmen.
"You understand, yes?" He hums, his hand gripping the gear shifts and we speed up, but he casts me one quick glance and that's all I need to melt.
I could let it go this one time. "Of course." I say as a small mischievous smile forms across my lips. "But only if we can put the roof down and ride past the beach on the way home."
It was cheesy, but mamá had a convertible and she'd let me stand up to embrace the few seconds of bliss that came with the fresh air and wind in my hair. It was exhilarating.
He merely frowns, "I don't know-"
"Please?" I ask turning towards him and after a moment, his broad chest heaves as he gives in, pressing the button that slowly switches the roof off before exiting the freeway.
When we drive by the beach, I kick off my shoes and carefully stand, holding onto the rim of the windshield before throwing my hands in the air. It feels so nice and freeing, I can't help but laugh and scream as Alessio drives with one hand on the wheel and a small amused smile that he tries to hide.
Our turn comes up and he makes the sharp turn before I can sit back down but his large hand comes up and he grips onto my thigh, steadying me as he rounds the corner. "Careful, Principessa."
I look up to the sky, hiding my blush from his eyes as his calloused fingers tighten on my skin ever so slightly as he makes yet another turn. His hold is firm enough to steady me, but soft enough not to hurt and the butterflies in my stomach go mad.
But the blissful moment of contact lasts only a minute, for the next thing I know, we're turning into the secluded guarded street and pulling up to the Galanti manor.
. . .
The second we got home, Alessio abandoned me, disappearing somewhere in the manor while he spoke on the phone animatedly in Italian. Only I couldn't understand half the words he was spewing and I knew it was because I had yet to learn those curse words.
In the meantime, I spent my time trying to get to know the other men in the house.
I had taken a liking to Marco.
Aside from being almost seven feet tall, quiet, always grumpy, and having an abnormally sweet tooth, he didn't talk much.
The only time he would talk would be to tell me to politely shut up or let me know how annoying I was.
I loved it.
He was large. A couple inches taller than Alessio and built like a football player, which would explain why he treated the gym as his second home.
But spending time with him was something I grew fond of for he never walked around on eggshells like most of the other men did.
"Marco!" I yell walking through the halls of the main floor in search of him. For such a large man he moved like a mouse. Quiet, fast and undetected.
"Marco! There you are." I say once I find the man digging through the fridge. He turns to me with a piece of cake in his hand and rolls his eyes. "You're supposed to yell Polo back when I call for you. It's like a cute thing I made for us." I argue as he turns and starts walking away.
"Hey." I huff, following after him. "Where are you going?- I just found you and though we could get to know each other-" He stops abruptly, causing me to run into his back, I groan and hold my head glaring at the back of his dark head.
He glances at his watch then back at me. "Bed time." He grumbles before throwing me over his shoulder like a sac of potatoes and heading up the stairs.
I laugh, swaying back and forth like I'm on a roller coaster and try tickling his sides but the football field of a man doesn't budge.
He finally sets me down in front of my bedroom door, "Sleep and leave me alone. It's late." He says in that deep yet quiet voice. I don't know why he doesn't like using it much, it's very soothing.
But before I can argue, he opens my bedroom door and pushes me in the room, shutting the door behind me, and leaving me alone.
And so, reluctantly, I start getting ready for bed.
I bathe, shave, do my skincare and decide on a cute white nightie. And when it's time for me to go to bed, I'm not sleepy.
Sleeping alone was something I learned I couldn't do easily by myself. And it had everything to do with the fact that mamá usually made it a habit to crawl into my bed and sleep with me after she was gone all day.
I quickly grew to despise sleeping alone.
Getting out of bed, I slip on my fuzzy pink slippers and a matching silk robe that goes to about midthigh as I step out of my bedroom, in need of some type of milk or tea to put me to sleep.
I look towards Alessio's bedroom door and see that it's closed and for a minute I think of what it would be like to fall asleep in his arms. Would he caress my hair? Would he hold me? Make me feel safe?
But then I glance towards one of the other doors in the hall, recognizing it to be his personal office and see the light on.
I make my way towards the door, knocking lightly, and when I hear a deep voice command me to enter, I open the door and stand in the threshold.
I watch through tired eyes as Alessio glances up from his desk where he seems busy doing paperwork.
He's still in his dress shirt only now it's all wrinkled and the top few buttons are popped off.
I glance at the clock, it was nearly one a.m.
I note just how late it is and look towards his face seeing eye bags and stress lines on his forehead, even his stubble has grown out since this morning.
It was common information around here that Alessio was always working and the sight of him so tired has my heart clenching.
He's way too young and handsome to be wasting it behind a desk at one in the morning when he could be in a comfy bed.
Preferably cuddling me.
He briefly looks up from the papers on his desk, and raises a brow at me. "Giana, what are you doing up?" He mutters distractedly, looking back to his papers.
I yawn and rub at my eyes before walking further into the room. "I couldn't sleep."
He offers a distracted hum.
"Could you not sleep either?" I question, coming to standstill in front of his desk and glancing down at the papers.
I try to read one of the contracts, but there's so many that my attention keeps snapping around and it gives me a headache.
He doesn't even glance up at me in my cute nightie before he replies in a soft murmur. "Haven't slept yet."
I frown at him. Did anyone ever tell this man when to stop? "You work yourself out too much, Alessio." I mumble. He pauses and glances up at me while I continue. "This isn't healthy. You know I once heard that some guy died because he was stressing himself out with work. " I say softly, my voice laced with concern.
He shakes his head, brushing me off. "Giana, it's late. Go to bed. You have to be up for school in a few hours." His tone turns stern but I decide to stand my ground.
I walk over until I'm standing next to him. "No. I'll go to bed when you go to bed."
His hand tightens around his pen and his shoulders tense slightly before he sighs. "I appreciate your concern, but I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."
"Everyone needs at least someone to look out for them." I push, "I want you to go to bed, Alessio." I grab onto his forearm that's writing on the paper and try to tug him up. Only he doesn't budge, only slightly moving his chair back to turn his body towards me.
"Stop." His tone is clipped and a warning but I do no such thing. I want him to go to sleep and get rest, and when he looks up letting me see his bloodshot eyes and hollowed cheeks, I know I'm doing the right thing.
I move, now standing in between his chair and desk as I stubbornly cross my arms.
He finally trails his gaze up the length of my body in my cute nightie, but he looks more annoyed than anything.
"I do not make a habit of repeating myself." His sharp jaw ticks and his tone lowers, " Leave. My patience is running thin right now." He is calm yet I can tell he's getting angry with the way he's gripping the arm of his chair as if stopping him from doing something else.
"And I mean it when I say you've had enough. Go to bed Alessio. I'm sure you can finish this paperwork tomorrow. Or even ask someone else to do it for you." I reason.
And then he snaps, slamming his fist down on the table next to my hip, his eyes flaring as he suddenly stands up, his front brushing mine in the process. "Would just listen for once, dannazione!" He explodes. (Dammit/Damn)
I lightly flinch at the sudden noise and my eyes widen as he towers over me, frustration and anger all over his perfectly chiseled face.
Despite my desire to be close to him ninety niece percent of the time, I find myself leaning away from him in pure intimidation. But he looks like he's not done.
"Stop being such a needy little brat for a second and open your eyes. I have work to finish." He leans forward as I lean back, his face hovering over mine, and his angry breaths hitting my skin, while his words are like venom. "The last thing I need is your annoying ass in my ear." He seethes before grabbing my arm and ushering me away from his desk.
I comply, still in shock and quite frankly not knowing how to handle the situation. I thought he would give up and go to bed. But with the way he's dragging me towards the door, I think it's anything but that.
"I was only concerned for your well being." I respond softly, not trying to work him up. Yet I can't seem to keep the hurt out of my tone at his sudden harshness. I couldn't handle being yelled at without having the sudden urge to cry.
"And I'm not asking you to be.I'm asking you to get your ass back in your room and stay the hell out of my way for once since you've barged into my life." He spits, pushing me out of his office and slamming the door in my face.
With a clenched jaw and heavy heart I will myself to calm down, for I know it's just exhaustion and pent up stress talking.
But it still doesn't stop me from storming to my bedroom and shedding tears.
Nor does it stop me from replaying his harsh words the next day and the day after that while Alessio tries to avoid me at all costs.
𓆩❤︎𓆪
Yes, she does cry alot what do you expect? I do kinda hate it when characters cry in a lot books but irl i'll deadass bawl my eyes out when someone yells at me.
Also what I said about guys liking girls with childlike faces is somewhat true. NOT ALL guys but it still makes me so uncomfortable and disturbed. LIKE EWWWW.
Also how tf is she gonna poke the beast and then get all surprised when he snaps. 🙄
ALSO I PROMISE SHE GETS BETTER!
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Please keep in mind this is a work of fiction and not a depiction of how people in real life should act.
A lot of her behaviour is unacceptable and wrong.