While there's nothing positive about Hydra, especially not the amount of data they owned, it seems to be beneficial for Steve and Natasha. Since there were so many secret storehouses and laboratories of Hydra, S.H.I.E.L.D. could not store all the data itself, but only guarded many facilities. After S.H.I.E.L.D. fell apart, many Hydra bases were simply left behind. The hardest part for Steve and Natasha had been getting here without the government noticing. From [Y/N]'s stories, Steve and Natasha knew roughly where the base must have been at which she had fled from."I don't even remember being here" mumbles Steve, running his fingers over the remains of the base. Almost everything is burned and what has survived is covered in ash.
"That doesn't look like what the Avengers would do. More like classic S.H.I.E.L.D. work" replies Natasha and continues to scan her surroundings. This bunker is too small to carry out experiments but too destroyed to have been unimportant. So there must still be a secret passage. "[Y/N] only told us what she heard when she escaped. Might have been S.H.I.E.L.D. all along."
"Maybe" replies Steve and looks at a metal cupboard that survived the destruction but can't find anything in there. "Or we're at the wrong place after all" he replies discouraged, wondering how they are supposed to find anything useful in this chaos.
"I don't think so" Natasha says, shaking her head. Her fingers travel along everything near her when she discovers a piece of wall that feels different than the rest of the bunker. It's hidden under the smoke and ash but she can tell that this wall hasn't been there originally. "Steve..."
Steve Rogers lifts his head curiously and sees Natasha inspecting the wall she stands in front of. He immediately grabs his shield, which is hanging on his back, and throws himself against the wall, which breaks and reveals a staircase, leading further down the bunker. "What did you just say?" Natasha asks teasingly, without changing a face. That she was right doesn't make things any more pleasant.
"Nevermind" replies Steve, rolling his eyes and walking down the steps in Natasha's company. A long, dark corridor stretches in front of them. Natasha finds a light switch and after some flickering, the corridor is illuminated by weak neon tubes. There are doors with different numbers on both sides every 5 to 10 meters. It's one of the biggest bases the two Avengers have seen.
While Steve continues to walk down the corridor, he discovers a door with the word 'Laboratory' on it. He opens the door with trembling hands and shudders at the sight in front of him. A stretcher similar to the one he found Bucky on is placed in the middle of the room. Fixing straps for arms and legs hang down on the sides, the leather on them is badly worn, presumably because the victims defended themselves against the pain. There are two tables on either side of the stretcher, with various medical equipment on them. Just the idea of what was done to the people who were fixed here makes Steve leave the room immediately.
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Hours have passed and Natasha and Steve are still searching through the base, which is far bigger than they thought. Natasha shudders at the thought of [Y/N] being held here for god knows how long. The data collection is staggering and only gives an idea of how much power and sacrifice Hydra had. The longer they are down here, the more uncomfortable she feels, almost as if Hydra is still here and tries to get under her skin. It could take days until they find what they are looking for and that thought makes Natasha shudder. She actually wants to get out of here as soon as possible.
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Shivering, Natasha turns the pages of the file, which make her more uncomfortable with every passing second. They are pages of misery, suffering, torture and pain. She would like to put the file down and forget what she has read. But these are the pages they hoped to find. But nobody should have to read what is written there. And nobody should have gone through what is documented there. It hurts Natasha to know the person that had to go through this and her eyes well up the more she reads. At some point, she can't take it anymore and closes the file. "Steve!" she calls her friend, who's in another room, also looking for some informations, but her voice breaks. She clears her throat briefly and calls him again. "I've got something."
"Me too" replies the latter, who is standing in the door shortly afterwards, a file in his hand. "Looks like I have found her best friend..."
"Then you won't like this at all" sighs Natasha and swaps files with Steve.
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Steve and Natasha have been gone for a full week and every day seems to be worse for [Y/N]. Natasha has been all she had for months and her and Steve have become the most important friends in her life. Not knowing where they are or what they're doing worries [Y/N] a lot. The exchange with her other friends distract and help her and she is glad that Bucky always brings her out of her room when she buries herself there, full of worries. He's probably also doing this to distract himself. Because even if he doesn't admit it, [Y/N] can't imagine that he's not worried about his best friend. Especially not when he doesn't know what Steve Rogers is up to this time.
It is in the middle of the night when [Y/N] wakes up again because she had another nightmare. As usual, she runs to Steve's room, only to find it empty. In her half-sleep she had completely forgotten that he is not there. However, this only speeds up [Y/N]'s tears, so that her whole face is wet within a few seconds and the remaining tears simply fall to the ground. Steve Rogers is the only person that knows about her nightmares but now that he's gone, she feels alone. Guilty for forgetting and alone because she can't share her fears. With every night she seems to forget the people from her dreams further. The face, which a week ago was clearly surrounded by blond curls, is now nothing more than a voice. The only reason [Y/N] still remembers her face is because she has drawn it more than once in the past week. If Steve would be here now, he would help her to calm down. As usual, he would hug her, rub her back soothingly, and tell her that everything is fine. And she would believe him, at least until the next morning. At least until she could sleep again.
But the empty room she's in right now only makes things worse. There is no one to calm her down, no one to talk to. And she's scared to be left alone with her thoughts. In order to at least distract herself and feel closer to Steve, [Y/N] begins to walk through his room and look at his belongings. His photos, his books and everything else he owns calm her down, making her feel like he's not that far away.
There is only weak light in the room that Sam only notices because the door to the room is wide open. He walks closer in surprise because he's sure that if Steve were back, it would certainly not be that secretly. Instead of finding Steve in there, it's [Y/N], which looks like frozen at the wall where the wardrobe is. "[Y/N]?" he asks carefully, rubbing his eyes to make sure he's not dreaming.
Said turns around and Sam can only tell from the glint on her face that she was crying. "His uniform is still there."
"Sorry, what?" Sam asks and now fully enters the room. Her voice was soft and broken, so that he had problems understanding her at all and putting the situation into perspective.
"His uniform is still there, Sam! Steve never leaves without his uniform! Not for any missions!"
Only now does Sam realize what it is about and he follows her gaze to the all-too-well-known Captain America Suit, which is only missing the shield. Still completely drowsy as he was only on the way to the bathroom, Sam tries to understand the problem of the situation. There was something like panic in [Y/N]'s voice, but he still doesn't quite understand what's going on or why she's in his room.
"Why is his uniform still here, Sam?!" [Y/N]'s voice is now even more panicked and louder than before. Despair speaks out of her, which now finally shakes Sam awake.
He reassuringly puts his arm on her shoulder to get her focus. "Don't worry. Captain America wasn't on the run before. The suit would only cause a stir. Don't you think?"
[Y/N] just blinks at him and tries to understand his words but then nods. "Why are you here?" Sam asks carefully. His eyes look at her caring and worried, yet determined.
"Not important" she says quickly, shaking her head, but Sam just grins at her slightly.
"Oh really? So it is completely normal that you stand in Steve's room at 2 in the morning, when he is not even here?"
[Y/N] opens her mouth to protest, but she can't think of an excuse so quickly, which makes Sam laugh slightly. After all, he still prefers to leave her wicked tongue speechless. "I was about to grab some water. How about you join for some late night conversation with good old Sam Wilson?" he asks softly, knowing that she needs some company right now.
[Y/N] has to sigh when only now the dark thoughts of the night subside and she realizes that Sam Wilson is the best company she can have at this time of the day because no matter how she feels, he'd never treat her different. Even now, he doesn't show any signs of pity and treats her with the same cheeky behavior she is used from him. "Gladly" she replies.
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[Y/N] could see how Sam fell asleep more than once whilst talking but always tried to stay awake to keep her company. The poor man surely only wanted to go to the bathroom but then found her dissolved and had no choice but to take care of her. But who would have thought that a short conversation with Sam Wilson could be so pleasant and relaxing.
Of course [Y/N] hasn't told him about her nightmares but they had talked about Steve's and Natasha's assignment and Sam had quickly started telling [Y/N] old stories about Steve to reassure her that he is doing okay and brighten up her mood.
Sam had doubts about Steve's sudden departure, too. He'd spent the past few years working by Steve's side and they'd become a great team and even better friends. Therefore it was strange not to be privy to his plan but Sam knew that there had to be a special reason. If Steve kept the reason for his departure a secret, it was for Sam's own safety.
Nevertheless, [Y/N] had sent him to bed a few minutes ago, after he had fallen asleep again, reassuring him that she's better now, thanks to his company. It's almost four in the morning when she passes Bucky's door on the way to her room and comes to a stop there. Suddenly, she longs for the person lying in there and for his touch. She longs for his warmth, his blue eyes and his voice. She longs for his company. And even if she shouldn't do it, [Y/N] opens the door as quietly as possible and sneaks into Bucky's room.
Very careful not to wake him up, she lies down with him in the bed, to which he is meanwhile used to. Still, the movement on the soft mattress is enough to wake Bucky, who's still not having the deepest sleep. Wearily, his eyes look at the woman lying across from him that looks at him apologetically.
"What are you doing here, doll?" he whispers while he already puts his arm around her and pulls her closer to him.
"I'm sorry" [Y/N] excuses. "I needed some company." Ashamed for waking him and being here in first place, she avoids his gaze and her eyes get caught on the dog tags that hang around his neck. If she remembers correctly, they were in his box full of memorabilia a few weeks ago and she wonders for how long he has been wearing them again.
"It's okay" he whispers sleepily and she feels his fingers dig deeper into her skin as he holds her before the tiredness overwhelms him again and he falls asleep straight away.
[Y/N] looks up at him with a smile thinking that a few weeks ago something like that would not have been possible. It makes her happy to see him that relaxed, without any troubles of falling asleep. She feels the twitch in Bucky's arm as his muscles slacken and his grip on her loosens. His features relax and his breathing becomes more evenly.
She looks back to the dog tags around Bucky's neck and carefully runs two fingers over the engraving and hopes that she will never forget people like Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes.