Zayn Malik
I was in a very bad mood and the fact Amber had just walked in didn't make it any better. I had barely slept last night because I was too anxious about seeing her again, and the way my stomach fluttered with the thought made me want to punch myself.
A part of me was dying to seee her again because I missed her... and then I remembered that it was all a lie.
Well, the fact Cleo and Harry decided to have a little pool party last night also wasn't helpful. Being alone with my thoughts and wondering how I could get my memories back was interrupted by their loud ass moaning, and I realized they were outdoors, and not upstairs. Not that it made any difference, the noise was still too much.
I grabbed the damn headphones Harry had gotten me, which I assumed had been a joke, but I had a feeling I'd be needing them a lot if I stayed here.
It was very weird to me, after watching Harry hating her and the Horans since I can remember, the last thing I expected was to witness this.
He was happy, though.
He deserved all the happiness in the world, despite what he thought. I still couldn't wrap my head around the idea that Cleo was a bottom, by the way. I knew Harry very well, sexually speaking too, but Cleo had a strong personality and I assumed she'd have some conflict with Harry on the dominance matter because they were both stubborn as fuck on the daily basis and very similar. But no... they were oddly compatible.
And very much in love.
As much as I wanted to help them and be here for Harry, I also wanted to go home... sleep in my bedroom and just let them enjoy themselves and maybe realize on their own what was going on. But I was secretly dreading it because I knew my apartment would smell like Amber.
I still had a few of her things there...I still remembered the way we talked about moving in together.
I knew that I lied to her about my profession, but what she did was incomparable. She only started this relationship because it was her job, because she needed a link to Harry and his family, and I was the stupid one to fall for her.
How long had she studied me and my behavior? How did she plan it?
The countless nights I'd spent worried sick about her safety, afraid that Desmond or Harry would want her dead because she worked at Eroda and was Cleo's friend... and now look at us.
I wanted to hate her... but I wasn't going to let my feelings interfere with any of this, she could be helpful and Cleo still trusted her, so I figured I could be the mature one.
The FBI's help was something I never fucking expected, we were all criminals in this house and Harry had literally let her in. I knew we had immunity now, but either way, it was dangerous. I hated cops.
Amber was wearing the same style of clothes as she usually would when she was being a fucking actress, jeans and a simple sweater, and her hair was tied up in a bun. The dark circles around her eyes were more evident and I wondered if they were from working late at Eroda or working at the bureau.
Speaking of which, I knew her job wasn't easy. I wasn't going to talk shit about it because she was risking her life infiltrating Catherine's business like this, and dancing demanded a lot of effort.
Also, watching girls disappearing throughout the years and not being able to do anything because you had to follow a plan and stick to your role had to be very frustrating.
Didn't change the fact she used me, led me on, and fucking lied. Her eyes instantly met mine the moment she stepped into the living room, followed by Harry and Cleo, but I looked away from her.
They were all looking at me as if I was some injured puppy who couldn't handle any of this, but they were wrong.
I watched as Cleo walked closer until she sat down next to me on the couch, reaching for the cigarette pack in her pocket and also a cute unicorn lighter, and she offered me a cigarette. I obviously accepted it, I had a feeling she was like me and smoked more when she was anxious.
But smoking weed before this meeting was a terrible idea, so I was satisfied enough with good old nicotine. I lit up my cigarette after Cleo lit up hers, and her blue eyes were almost intimidating as she studied me, inhaling some smoke.
My eyes were focused on Amber when she decided to approach the crime board on Harry's window reading our theories as if they were her own. Must be easy to do your job when you had people on the inside working for you, fucking useless cops.
"Niall's name is crossed out?" Amber asked, and listening to her voice again made a chill go down my spine. "Is he dead?"
"Fuck off, he's not a suspect anymore." Harry rolled his eyes, running his fingers through his hair and leaning against the wall as he squinted at her. "Wanna take a picture? Maybe recreate it once you get home?"
"Harry," Cleo warned, exhaling some smoke as she stood up from the couch, walking closer to Amber. "We're trusting you on this, I'm actually the only one in this house who believes you're going to help us, Amber."
The moment those words left Cleo's mouth, Amber looked at me. Her brown eyes were filled with frustration and sadness, and the knot in my stomach was making me sick.
Fuck, this was harder than I thought.
I looked away from her as I exhaled some smoke, trying to get my shit together and focus on what really mattered.
"I'm also risking a lot by coming here and giving you immunity. My supervisor didn't want to believe you were being honest about not being involved with your parents' business." Amber said. "But I believe you... so let's get to it."
"Can't you just call a S.W.A.T. team and lock them up or kill them already?" Harry asked and I had to stop myself from laughing.
I looked up at him, watching as Cleo leaned against the wall right next to him and he actually wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer as she held her cigarette between her lips.
"This is a serious operation. It's not only about your father or Cleo's mother. It involves the suppliers and a whole web of clients. We've been studying their routes too, it's not as easy as you think." Amber sounded annoyed at Harry and the way he huffed proved the feeling was mutual.
Harry wasn't one to be patient, that's why he was an impulsive son of a bitch. Thank god Cleo was smarter, I had a feeling she saved his ass more times than he let me know.
"What did you find out?" Cleo asked her.
"I did some research on the names on your list and also the files you have of the children allegedly sold to them." Amber cleared her throat. "Luchas Johnson is alive, but he was arrested last month because of drugs... and now he won't leave anytime soon, so you can cross his name off the list."
Well, it was a bit awkward that she knew Harry and Cleo had killed the others, but they all fucking deserved it. If we could track down every single one of them, I'd even help. People like this shouldn't even be allowed to breathe.
"Okay... what else?" Harry asked, furrowing his eyebrows.
"Cleo told me the list you both have are the same and contains more than enough information on each target... and I tracked down the kids." Amber glanced sideways at me but I ignored her. "I could find every single one of them from the file... but two."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Cleo pulled away from Harry so she could walk closer to Amber, and I noticed some small bruises on his neck. "They're okay?"
"Well, when children are trafficked for sexual purposes, they often get passed around until they're older and traumatized enough. Some of them go into the system and then move on with their lives when they're eighteen... but sadly, most of them are dead. Not all, though." Amber explained and Cleo looked like she was about to throw up.
And I could relate, this was so fucking disgusting.
"So you couldn't find two of them?" Harry asked. "Are they dead?"
"I don't know." She sighed. "But have you ever considered that this list could've been created like some sort of revenge strategy? Have you considered that one of the kids is now grown and decided to not move on? I mean, it seems like whoever it is, they wanted those men dead and indirectly it kinda forced you to discover the truth. I can't say anything else, but maybe the two children I couldn't track are alive or just one of them? It doesn't seem to me that their goal is to kill you."
"But why us? Why now?" Cleo sounded almost desperate and I knew this whole situation was very fucking stressful.
There were so many loose ends that we didn't know if they were connected or not. If I could just fucking remember anything at all about my kidnapping...
"Doesn't change anything to me. It's still someone who wants us to do the dirty work for them." Harry rolled his eyes. "Anonymously, I might add. That's pretty suspicious to me."
"I was just trying to help and find some links with the case, I figured you could look at things from another angle. This isn't my job, but if I were you I'd still keep it on the low, and please, don't interfere with the case. If your parents call, you call me... I can give you immunity as long as you stay away." Amber said, looking into Cleo's eyes. "Good luck figuring out the list and staying out of trouble."
She clearly didn't know who she was talking to, but Amber was actually very fucking smart to consider that one of the trafficked kids could be behind this.
But how would they know Ceo and Harry weren't involved with it? Unless their plan was to kill them anyways... and the list was a distraction to show them that they knew the truth.
Or worse, what if they were planning on killing Cleo and Harry to get to Desmond and Catherine, be some sort of payback? And this was all part of their plan.
But then, there was Niall.
Either way, it seemed like things were only getting started, we couldn't be careless.
"What about your informer?" Cleo asked Amber while she put on her cigarette. "This person has been helping you with your case, but maybe it can help us with the list."
"Cleo, this doesn't concern you." Amber shook her head. "I shouldn't even be here, you have no idea how complicated and dangerous this is."
"Why are you here, then?" I couldn't stop myself from speaking up. Complicated? She had no fucking idea.
"Because we have a deal." Amber looked into my eyes and I had to repress the urge to look away. "I'm happy you're okay, Zayn."
"Bullshit." I huffed. "How are you happy if you're the one who hurt me? I'm fucking far from okay and you coming around and acting all professional isn't going to change anything. Amber."
"You have the right to be upset, but I'm-"
"Don't say you're sorry." I interrupted her, standing up from the couch and trying to calm my heartbeat. I was angry and upset and so fucking sad.
I missed her so much.
"But I am." She grimaced. "Can you excuse us for a little while? I need to talk to Zayn." Harry was about to say no when Cleo intertwined their fingers, catching his attention.
He shut up and allowed her to pull him towards the kitchen, and I didn't protest because the weak part of me was dying to be alone with her. And then it was just us.
"Zayn, please. You have no idea how much I wanted to tell you because I knew you weren't involved with this but my job comes first and it was dangerous. I know your job is also dangerous, that's why you didn't tell me the truth." She stepped closer to me."But it wasn't a lie."
"Fuck you." I snapped. "Not a lie? You purposely made me fall in love with you so I could be your stupid informer without even knowing!"
"Yes, I arranged for us to meet the first time, but I care about you. I really do." Her eyes were watering and she could go fool someone else, but not me. "I needed to see you again, I was so relieved when Cleo told me you were okay."
"I was willing to fucking quit my job for you! You know how much I risked, Ju- Amber!" Fuck, this was too much.
"I know you won't believe me anymore... but I really love you. And this was the last thing I ever expected to happen." Amber took a deep breath, never looking away from me. "I'm sorry, Zayn. I really am. But I did what had to be done."
I couldn't do this anymore. It was getting harder to breathe and it hurt so fucking much because I believed her.
I believed someone I didn't truly know. I was so fucking pathetic.
"I hope it was worth it, Amber."