Song Choice: Vera Lynn - We'll Meet Again
Lana pitifully placed a hand on the girl's cheek. "(Y/n) darling. They don't care about your problems."
Ouch. (Y/n) easily believed that as a fact.
"They don't care about you. They don't care about anybody. They only care about people as a whole group, not individually. But here in the Despair Facility, you're cared about, you're seen, you're loved, you're welcomed, you're valued. You matter to us, you belong here with us."
(Y/n) felt herself weaken and begin to return to her toxic mindset that she needed to stay with Lana and the Facility. Her face revealed sadness and sentimental longing for her motherly figure's affection as she closed her eyes and snuggled her cheek with Lana's hand, her grip on the gun not as hard as before.
"You just need to keep on sacrificing parts of yourself before you make despair your ally-"
(Y/n) snapped her eyes back open. She knew if Lana talked more that she would eventually manipulate and convince (Y/n) to come back to her, she would use her biggest weakness against her; her indecisiveness. She smacked Lana's hand away with a furious expression and Lana reacted with an offended and shocked face, (Y/n) has never rejected her tenderness before.
"No! I'm done with it! It's not my thing and it never has been! Even though you were the one to show me the world, you were wrong about it all. And now I see that so clearly. You could've chosen anyone else to mentor! Everyone else here clearly loves what you love more than me! Like Melanie or Ta-"
"Ugh!" Lana groaned loudly with an eye roll before (Y/n) could finish. "You think I want that sycophant to be in authority?"
Lana returned to her attentive, motherly caring state. "(Y/n), your destiny is to stay here. Forever. Once you killed your parents and joined us, you knew there was only one way to go. Up. You knew it was survival of the fittest. So you started slashing and slaying by my command. God you were such an addict. You just could never stop. You're still addicted to killing and carnage. You're a bloodlust addict." Lana accused with an evil smile and sly eyes like a snake.
(Y/n) felt her blood run cold and all color in her face drain. Her face proved her heart was in pure shock terror. "T-That's not true!" She defended but her horrified stutter went against her.
"Oh but it is. I've been observing your behavior and it matches up with all the signs and symptoms of an addiction." Lana took a step closer to (Y/n) which prompted to take a step back. Both of their next steps equal.
"You have a lack of control or inability to stay away from a chance of manslaughter. Sometimes you'd have decreased socialization, like abandoning commitments or ignoring relationships, just to do some murder. You ignore risk factors, like just going in on the homicide without thinking of potential consequences. Your withdrawal symptoms from bloodshed include anxiety, sweating, irritability, fatigue, shaking, insomnia, headache, and difficulty concentrating. Read in between the lines, you're a hardcore ruthless addict! You're always itching and bouncing around to spill more blood. You always get so excited. It's weird to think that present you and past you are the same person."
Lana's sinister voice and smile shifted to sad confusion. "But there's this one thing, you never got stars in your eyes. I never saw you thriving while taking someone's life. Surely I know you enjoyed it, but you didn't like doing it. You were always so much softer than the others. I know you wanted to show mercy but you never did. You are such a strange person. Like the embodiment of the Yin Yang. How does one enjoy the action of killing but not the actual death? You didn't enjoy the despair from the guilt of your conscience, but you still did unholy things for fun. That doesn't make any sense. Maybe you just wish you could kill someone without them being a human with feelings and emotions and a life. Maybe you're just the perfect balance of good and evil. But still no stars."
Even though she was practically shaking in her (desired shoes), (Y/n) forced herself to throw a combative punch directed toward Lana. But to (Y/n)'s unexpected shock, Lana quickly dodged it at an amazingly impressive speed and style. In that same second, Lana expeditiously delivered a spinning roundhouse kick in a belligerent fashion.
Lana's heel of her stiletto harshly and brutally striked (Y/n)'s left side of her face, the heel additionally scraping her eyeball. (Y/n) roughly hit the ground, her body sliding a few meters from the powerful blow, and held her side in pain with one arm while her other hand slapped itself onto her eye in a reflex. Blood oozed from her damaged eyeball and dripped down her cheek and hand, she hissed in severe pain.
But Jesus fucking Christ, she didn't know Lana could fight like that. Sure she knew that Lana was part of the assassin program in her younger years before she became the new leader, but she didn't know she was faster than her, the best fighter in the Facility and Commission combined.
When the bleeding suddenly stopped, (Y/n) knew her eye healed and wasted no more time before painfully standing back up again, readjusting her grip on her gun.
Lana approached (Y/n) once again and the younger girl attempted to perform an effective axe kick but Lana intrusively used her dominant palm to push away the kick with her more matured strength. (Y/n) tried to hit the woman with several attacks but Lana countered and overpowered all of them but when the (H/c) girl aimed a lead hook, the blonde woman invasively grasped her wrist and used that grip to force (Y/n)'s own arm across her neck. Lana also grabbed (Y/n)'s other wrist that had the hand that held her gun and stretched that arm away to keep (Y/n) in place with her back against Lana's front.
(Y/n) breathed heavily, both in shock and terror.
Lana spoke softly. "You know, to me you were like my first born baby. It's true that I've felt different kinds of love before. Romantic love for my past lover, platonic love for my friends, love for a parent figure. But with you... I've never felt this way before. I see you as... a daughter. Like my own daughter."
Lana bit her tongue and debated if she wanted to admit her next words. "(Y/n)... I love you."
(Y/n) quietly gasped and her eyes widened, tears immediately created themselves. Everyone knew that Lana Griz loved nearly nothing but despair. She was evil and heartless and cruel. But to realize that she had at least one small redeemable quality, it made the truth come crashing down on (Y/n).
Love finds its way into every heart. And love will forever be on the side of good. So that means that there's at least an ounce of good in everyone. The right amount and kind of love can redeem anyone. So did that mean Lana wasn't a total lost cause?
Lana released (Y/n) from her grip and turned the girl around to face her. "You're my one and only, you're the motivation in my life. My parents kicked my sister and I out of the house when we were only 14 and I swore if I ever had a daughter I would give my all to her. Then you came along and you changed my life. I always got the opposite of despair from you... and I didn't hate it as much..."
(Y/n) felt happy tears sting her eyes with how much sudden love she was feeling. Lana's last sentence proved that she could help the woman she saw as her mother. She could show her the light and with the right amount of love that only a mother and daughter have, she could keep her in her life.
"So I want you to understand the glory of pain like I do."
Lana quickly forced (Y/n)'s own hand to point the gun at her gut and used her slender finger to push (Y/n)'s finger down on the trigger. And...
BANG!
Blood splashed from Lana's abdomen and onto (Y/n)'s chest and stomach, blood seeped out of Lana's red lips.
(Y/n)'s eyes widened in utter, terrible terror and the tears in her eyes finally fell. Birthed from happiness but fell from heartbroken grief. "NO!"
Lana leaned back from sudden exhaustion and was about to fall back first but (Y/n) caught her and softly landed her on the ground in her arms. "Wait-Wait no no no no no no! I-I change my mind! Wait!"
Lana gripped onto (Y/n)'s shoulder and looked at her sternly and with a serious voice said, "No! It's already been done, you can't go back and change it (Y/n). You have to learn to stick with your decisions. You have to stop changing your mind."
(Y/n)'s lips quivered and more tears fell as she coughed and gasped from the effects of her ugly sobbing.
"But you do realize... I did this because I love you. I was always looking out for you, I just wanted you to feel as good as I did. Have you noticed that I never gave up on you?" Lana choked and coughed up more blood, her own small tears filling up her eyes, but looked up at (Y/n) in pure happiness. "You were always my top priority. I know you didn't know, but it's true. So I hope you know how much I care about you. So that's what makes this despair so good. Being killed by the light of my life is the best way to go. No one makes it out of life alive, so I'm glad this is the way I'm going. Sharing this despair with you. We're both feeling such great pain. And the more I think about it, the more it hurts. I still had so many places I wanted to show you and be there with you, but now that will never happen. Everyday you grew some more which made me fear that I was losing you and our time together was going too fast. I just wanted to freeze time to just stay in the moment a little longer."
Lana's smooth, foxy voice began to break in despair. "And now I'll never see you grow up. I won't see you tomorrow, I won't see you the next day, I won't see you the following weeks, and I won't see your next birthday. I already miss you so much. Sharing your laughter was one of the best memories I've ever had."
(Y/n)'s tears fell on Lana's blood as the liquids joined and mixed as one. (Y/n) grabbed Lana's hand and squeezed it near her heart, feeling agony tear her apart from the inside. Her other hand was still resting behind Lana's head as she cradled it.
Lana smiled softly as tears finally fell from the corners of her eyes and ran into her hair and ears. "Time to finally enter hell, my real home. Don't worry, I'll put in a good word for you. The devil said he'll be back for your soul... later. But (Y/n), you've got to stay on top." She placed a hand on (Y/n)'s cheek to wipe her wet cheek. "And if being the hero will get stars in your eyes, then so be it. So with all my heart, I wish you only the best." Her voice got quieter and weaker the more she spoke until she finally couldn't muster any more words before her smile froze and eyes lost life.
(Y/n)'s frown froze as well before shaking Lana and checking for a pulse on her neck, chest and wrist. But no beat. (Y/n)'s hand hovered above Lana's cold corpse, not knowing what to do before taking Lana's hand again. Her breath quickened before she let out a deafening scream that would've made the most heartless people frown.
She looked back down at the lifeless body in her arms. "You were always there for me. You always tried to make me a braver person. You always wanted nothing but the best for me and rarely ever from me. You just wanted me to love despair like you did. You wanted me to feel the worst feeling ever so nothing underneath would weaken me. And I think I'm finally feeling it. But I'll never have you back... and that's what makes it so good. I'll never be able to unfeel this, I'll always feel like I don't have you and I'll always know why I don't have you anymore. I-I-I'll always feel this way. I'll always feel this despair. And I'll always know that you're not here anymore. I'll always know that it was my fault... and I'll always know that I lost you." The girl criminal started sobbing uncontrollably.