"Do you wanna spend the night?" I ask as I'm cuddled into Mateo's side and he's playing with my hair. He came over earlier today, it's already pretty late and I don't want him driving around at this time.
"You already know the answer V," he responds and wraps his other arm around me so he's hugging me. I relax against him, his warmth radiates off him and makes me feel really comfortable. He has his shirt off so I'm able to feel his skin, his soft warm skin. I cuddle myself more into him and breathe in.
"Mmm, well come on let's go get ready for bed," I try to get up but his arms tighten around me. I know for a fact he isn't going to let go, usually he gets up in a couple minutes.
"Just a few more minutes Vero."
I don't attempt to tell him anything anymore. I just love being with him. He makes me feel calm. My thoughts are always at bay when he's around.
My eyes start to feel heavy and I nuzzle my face closer to his neck. He's so warm. I don't know how, but he's always warm. Even when it's cold outside, his hands always manage to warm me up.
"Come on. Let's go get ready before you fall asleep," Mateo says but I don't move. "It's your fault I'm sleepy. You should've gotten up when I said so." I say and move myself closer to him.
I feel the vibration coming from his chest as he chuckles. He sits up still having his arms around me. "Let's brush our teeth real quick, use the restroom if we need to, and then we'll be back in bed." I move my head from his neck and look at him with droopy eyes. He smiles and puts his hand on my face.
"You're so beautiful V."
I drop my head onto his shoulder hoping he won't notice my red cheeks. But he already knows the effect he has on me so it's useless.
"Thank you," I say while smiling. I move my head back so I'm able to look at him again. "You're very handsome," I grab his face and peck his lips. Before he has the chance to deepen the kiss, I remove his arms from around me and stand up from the bed. He tilts his head to the side and a smirk places itself onto his face. I make my way towards the bathroom.
Mateo walks in a few seconds after me and starts to brush his teeth. Our night routine consists of brushing our teeth, using the restroom if needed, and washing our face. I told Mateo it's good to cleanse his skin before going to bed, so he started doing it with me.
I'm still pretty sleepy so I just do the routine silently. I can feel Mateo's eyes on me so once I'm done I head back out onto the room and get comfortable on my bed. I close my eyes and feel sleep taking over by the second. But before I'm completely out, Mateo lays down beside me and brings me into his chest. His hand slips underneath my shirt and his thumb gently rubs small circles on my stomach. After a few seconds, I'm out like a light.
~
Mateo keeps moving from beside me and I groan. Why do some people move a lot while sleeping? It doesn't make sense to me but I'm not going to complain. He usually never moves a lot but I guess tonight he must be having trouble sleeping.
I hear him stand up from the bed and open the bathroom door. When I hear the door close, I pick up my phone from the night stand and see that it's 3:11am. I'll ask him right now what's wrong. I set the phone back down and rub my eyes with my hands.
Once I'm able to get the sleep out of my eyes, I look around the room even though it is pretty much dark. The post lamps from outside, the light seeping from beneath the bathroom door, and the moonlight seem to be the only light source in here.
I wait for Mateo to get out of the bathroom so I can ask him what's wrong but he seems to be taking a long time in there. I stand up from the bed and make my way towards the door. When I get there I put my ear against it and hear sniffles. Thoughts begin to swirl my mind and I figure out why he's crying.
Marisela.
There's days where he's happy and there are days where he doesn't want to do anything but cry in my arms. It's still hard for him and I sometimes don't know what to tell him.
I gently knock on the door hoping I don't startle him. "Mateo" I say softly. "You okay?"
He opens the door and I look up at him. His eyes are red and his cheeks are flushed. He rubs his eyes for a few seconds and drops them down. Without saying anything I bring him into a hug. He wraps his arms tightly around me and cries onto my shoulder. I rub his back and he cries even harder.
"Shh it's okay love," I say in a soft tone. "You're okay."
I kiss his head and pull away. Grabbing his hands, I pull him out of the bathroom, turn off the light and shut the door. I lead him towards the bed and lay down, but instead of him cuddling me, I cuddle him. I place his head on my chest and he wraps his arms around my waist. He continues to cry. He misses her. But there's nothing that can be done. I try the best that I can to comfort him. Rubbing his back, kissing his head, telling him "he's okay."
After a few minutes he calms down and just sniffles a bit.
"Sorry," he breaks the silence. Before he can say anything else I grab his face in between my hands and look at him in the eye. "Do not say sorry Mateo. I've already told you there's nothing to apologize for. I know it's hard for you and if you ever need to let out how you feel. I'm here for you. I'm always going to be here." I tell him and he sends me a sad smile. He doesn't respond after what I told him. Which is fine, I know sometimes he doesn't want to talk about it because it makes it worse.
"It's hard V. I just want her to still be here," he says in a shaky voice. Just seeing him sad makes me sad. Why did him and his family have to go through this? No one deserves this, especially the Hernandez's.
"I know M," when I say that he looks up at me with tear filled eyes. He closes them and the tears start to fall.
"She used to call me that." My heart breaks and I pull him into my chest. His sobs are heard around the room and I am trying my best to not cry. Why would I say that? I have never called him that before and I decided to say it right now? God, I feel bad.
"Let it out Mateo," is the only thing I say as he continues to cry.
~
After thirty minutes, he manages to calm down once again. He moved out of my arms and made his way back to the bathroom. I let him go without question. Right now is not the time to boss him around. He needs to have his personal space and I am not going to push him.
I cover my face with my hands and let out a breath. I love him so much. I want to be with him all the times he feels like this. I want him to know that he is not alone. I want him to know that things will get better eventually. It takes time.
The bathroom door opens once again and I turn my head towards the sound. Mateo turns off the light and makes his way back to the bed. Instantly, I open my arms for him to lay on my chest once again. He doesn't think twice about it and moves quickly. His hair tickles my chin and I wrap my arms around his large frame.
"Talk to me about something," he says.
"Anything?" I ask and he nods.
"Anything."
I take a deep breath and think about something to say.
"What do you want to do after high school?" I question him as his head lays on my chest. His arms are wrapped around my waist securing me in place. I run my hand through his hair and he lets out a sigh.
"I'm not sure, but what I do know," he looks up at me. "I want to spend the rest of forever with you." A smile grows on both of our faces. I lean down and place a kiss on his soft lips.
I pull away and rest my forehead against his. The love I have for him grows more and more each day. Sooner or later I'm not gonna be able to hold in the "L" word.
Kissing his lips once again, I take in how warm they are. Every time we kiss it's like the butterflies in my stomach won't settle down. Pulling away once again, I brush some of his soft hair away from his forehead.
"I want to spend my life with you too."
~
600 reads!!! THIS IS AMAZING!! I honestly never expected to have this many reads! I hope all of you lovely people are enjoying my book so far! It is coming to an end soon and I am very sad. I am having so much fun writing this and I hope you are having fun reading it! I recently published my new book "Chasing Goals" it is Alison's and Alejandro's story! I am very excited to start up pushing chapters for that book! For now, the prologue and aesthetics have been posted!! Once again, thank you ALL so much for 600 READS!!! I LOVE YOU ALL VERY MUCH!<3
~kjocelyn81