She was surprised to hear birds.
So when she woke the next morning, able to open her eyes to stare at the piece of chipped paint on her ceiling, she could do nothing but stare for a moment longer, almost in disbelief that she was breathing.
The whinny and neigh of horses outside made her sit up and quickly stumble over to her window. The carriages were arriving, and some guests already had their luggage outside.
She fell back against the sheets with a soft sigh. Today was going to be the first of many more days without Sebastian. She gasped as pain bolted through her body, sending her lurching forward in bed.
Maybe it won't be as many days as I think...
Mey-Rin's rapt knock on the door made her sit back, "Yes?" Aurora whispered, wiping the remnants of last nights tears from her eyes as Mey-Rin opened the door to her room. "Apologies, Miss Aurora... But the young master wants to know what you'll be doing this morning."
Aurora swallowed heavily. "Tell him that I'll see him in the foyer in ten minutes."
-
In her hand was a suitcase. Filled with a few things from her closet. Her hair was haphazardly tied into a long curled mess, and sitting bulkily over her shoulders was a heavy trench coat- formerly Sebastian's, and in her pocket, clasped within her other hand, was his pocket watch.
Walking slowly to the main foyer, the only thing on her mind being- what now?
Her heart was in tatters, and soon enough she might very well join her lover in death. With each solemn fall of her heel, a new memory dashed across her brain, akin to that of a deer fleeting through a field of green grasses.
"Tell me... why do you stay?"
"Why wouldn't I?"
Tap.
"You promised me sweets this time, mon amie!"
"Haha... As promised, my angel."
Tap.
"Tell me one of your stories! Please?"
She paused, stifling her tears with a sleeved arm. On the fourth finger of her left hand, sat the red engagement ring. The stone glistened in the hallway light, more so when the occasional tear splashed upon it. The ring was all she had left of him, and she supposed she might as well deem the man hers.
She'd been his. It was only fair.
She smiled sadly, glancing once at the ring. They had always said eternity.
Eternity, and forevermore...
She scoffed at that now. Maybe forever... Maybe that was a word that was meant for nothing more than sweet memories. Lost to the living forever.
Lost to her forever.
The only one who had ever truly understood her enough to read her like a book was gone. And soon enough, she'd join him in death's cold embrace. Perhaps we'll keep each other warm in the world that lies beyond... Unless that world is nothingness...
She sighed, taking a breath and continuing to the foyer, a mournful aura shrouding her in a metaphorical darkness that threatened to bring forth a dark end.
Not that she cared anymore.
As far as she was concerned, that darkness could take her too.
So, nonchalantly, she carried on. Hoping death might act like a comforting embrace. Her heels clicked against the polished marble floors, and she found most of the guests already outside, aside from a remaining few. Amoung the ones lingering behind was Doctor Arthur. The man stood with his single pale suitcase, off to the side from the others, yet still in that 'inner circle' of sorts. He caught her gaze first, quick to profile her as the sympathetic young widow who'd lost everything.
Then again, Aurora supposed that depiction was more or less accurate. She appeared young at least, and Sebastian was gone. And he had been all that mattered. She swallowed the lump in her throat, almost in tears again at the memory of his eyes, once warm pools of blood red, reduced to a pale pink that held no life in them.
She'd never forget that.
Sighing, she tried to blink away the visual as she approached Doctor Arthur. "I wanted to thank you," she said softly, "You solved the case. And without you, I'm not sure the right man would have been found." Arthur smiled, "I was only doing what was necessary. He deserved justice. Your fiancé." Aurora smiled, "Yes." She agreed, glanced at the ring on her finger. "He did."
"Might I ask?" Arthur pried, "Has the Earl... Let you go?"
Aurora smirked, laughing a bit. " Non . His Lordship has done no such thing. I'm leaving of my own accord. There's nothing left for me here." She smiled, sadness glittering in her eyes. "I came here for him. He was here, so I followed. Sebastian was everything to me. He was the only one who was ever there, the only one who ever understood me. I loved him, Doctor Arthur. And without him... I have no reason to stay."
Arthur's eyes widened a bit, catching on to the slight tone in her voice. "You mean...?" Aurora hummed, "I'm already ill, Doctor. I didn't tell him." Her silver blue eyes surveyed his own brown.
"If you weren't already aware, from the other night... I already have a death sentence. I'm going to die whether I like it or not. And I don't mind it." She smiled kindly at him, ignoring the shocked look on his face. "So I'm going home."
"Oh.. I'm so sorry." He murmured sympathetically. The blonde still smiled, the only thing betraying her was the pain of loss in her eyes. "Don't be." She cleared her throat and glanced out the open door, "Regardless, your carriage is here." She flashed him a friendly smile, "I do hope you continue that writing career of yours. I know the young master was rather disappointed when he learned your last detective story wouldn't be receiving a sequel."
Arthur blushed a bit and nodded. "I believe I will."
He bid her adieu and rushed out to his carriage. As he disappeared into it, the soon to be Fallen glanced down at her ring finger.
Soon .
"Aurora. A word?" The blonde glanced over her shoulder at the boy making his way down the stairs. She sighed, "You can't change my mind, Ciel." She came forward to meet the boy with a kind smile. "I've enjoyed being here, but now there's nothing for me now. Sebastian is..." She cleared her throat. "Gone." Ciel frowned, watching her eyes. "You really cared about him, didn't you?" He murmured. She smiled, "Of course I did... He was everything to me." She toyed with the ring on her finger, continuing.
"In other words, he was my soulmate."
Ciel glanced over, "Is that the immortal term for a husband or wife?" Aurora smirked, "Oh no. Soulmates run deeper than that." She sighed, "My mother used to tell me stories when I was young. Roughly your age when you signed the contract with Sebastian." She took a breath and leaned back against the end of the bannister.
"Soulmates aren't people who complete you. They're someone who inspires you to complete yourself." She smiled sadly, "A soulmate is someone who loves you with such conviction, and so much heart- that it's nearly impossible to doubt just how capable you are of becoming exactly who you have always wanted to be."
Tears began brimming in her eyes again. "Soulmates aren't just lovers, Ciel. I may have loved him- so very much. But above all he's always been my best friend. He's been there for me. And now... he's not."
A growing lump in her throat made her swallow before continuing. "I'm going to miss him for the rest of my life... No matter how long or short it is." The boy before her was silent. She sighed and took a breath. "Never mind it. I suppose I can wait until the guests leave to sign the paperwork. It is the least I can do."
Ciel was quiet, and she suspected there was something he wanted to say, but before she could ask her ears caught the sound of Irene's giggle. The angel's silver blue eyes were quick to wander to the carriage outside, lingering on Grimsby and Irene.
The man helping her into the carriage, a smitten look upon his face, her own flushed pink as she giggled, her hand only leaving his once he'd settled her into the carriage. It wasn't as loving a display as Aurora might have with Sebastian- but it was a fair comparison.
If anything, it reminded the angel of their youth. Two young beings, swept away in a sense of intimacy, plagued by passion and tenderness that was foreign to them both. Even centuries later Aurora could still hear their echoed laughter in her mind from time to time, could hear the faintest of conversations- then a voice as if it had come from behind her, only to turn and be the only one in the room.
Watching as the two humans leaned in for a kiss, Aurora quickly averted her eyes, squeezing them shut and wincing, clasping her left hand close to her heart.
She would never have that again.
Why does it have to be so hard?
She could easily see him dead again. Laying dead on the floor in front of her, eyes wide open, his blood pooling around him.
It was a flickering image, but still enough to make her reach out to grab the wall for some semblance of support. Her other hand cupped over her mouth, eyes shut in pain as she tried to force back the image. "Please.. Please.. stop... Don't think about it... Don't see it ..." She mumbled to herself, willing her body to calm as her breathing rattled her core, making her feel as if she were about to cry for possibly the thousandth time since she found her lover's corpse.
"Aurora?"
Ciel.
"Aurora, are you alright?"
"I'm fine!" She rasped, "Just give me a moment..." She moved the hand over her mouth to run through her hair, trying to soothe herself from the nightmarish vision.
Calm down...
There was a bright flash within her mind that showed a twisted combination of both Sebastian and her father's corpses.
She grit her teeth. No... Don't show me this....
Another flash, this time she saw the two of them young, beside the lake- a flower being pushed into her hair, and her beloved demon with a bright smile on his youthful face.
I'll never see that face again...
Another flash. Her father returning home from a trip.
Then a final flash- different from the rest.
She saw herself. She saw herself caught in mid scream, eyes wide with terror, looking at something.
The image vanished before Aurora had the chance to question it.
How...?
The front door slamming open made her jump, a hand moved quickly to shield her chest and face, lowered only when she saw the desperate author panting and out of breath, sweat rushing down his brow in strong beads.
"Doctor Arthur?" She questioned, "Are you alright?" She suddenly noticed that Jeremy hadn't yet left. In fact, the man was standing on the stairs beside Ciel, smiling almost... devilishly at the Doctor. Aurora winced suddenly, feeling the man's fear yet strong sense of justice.
It burned.
Forcing herself to stand at full height, her hand holding tightly onto the end of the bannister, teeth still grit and her eyes tearing from the pain. She narrowed her eyes at the man, then called to the young boy.
"Ciel... Come here."
He didn't move, an impish smirk on his face.
"Ciel!" She called again, ending in another series of coughs. Arthur looked over at her worriedly. "Miss-!" She glared at Jeremy, her eyes sparking with a faint whitish gold fire. "Ciel! Come over here! Now!"
Jeremy chuckled, brown eyes having a faint glow to them and his next words sending every inch of her body afire with a foreign blend of fear and relief.
" Now, now, my dear... How many times have I instructed you to address the young master correctly?"
She watched with a sense of dread building within her as he removed the latex face of Jeremy- revealing none other than the face of the man she'd almost been certain laid dead. Her breathing picked up again, her eyes wide as a series of thoughts cursed her mind.
How did I not see it?
How could I have not known it was him all along?
Why did he do this?
He must have known...
The tears began falling.
He knew. He knew and stood by...
He watched me grieve....
And he did nothing....
As her body slowly slid onto the floor, Aurora barely noticed herself falling to her knees in silent anguish, mouth slightly ajar as shock coursed through her body,
"Y-you're alive..."
Sebastian's face quickly fell, detecting her rising anxiety, and slowly descending the steps towards her as she slowly slumped to the floor on her knees, staring down at her pale reflection in the tile.
"Darling, I-"
Slap.
The bright red handprint was a contrast to his pale skin, and he couldn't help but stare blankly at her in awe. Aurora's eyes were burning red, the silver blue in them glassy as tears ran freely down her cheeks.
" Don't touch me!...
You let me believe that you were dead..."
A strong shudder ripped through her and she lurched forward into him, coughing harshly, blood spitting into the palm of her hand.
"Shit..."
The rareness of a curse graced her lips as she stifled a breath, her bloodied hand shaking as she hunched over in pain, breath hot against her palm. Kneeling beside her, Sebastian was quick to move her so she was a little more balanced, gently massaging a hand on her back. She heaved, spitting up more blood, staining the white tiles a pale colour. Sebastian pressed his hand gently against her back, feeling the way her lungs moved. Her breathing was staggered, lungs struggling to push air, and he briefly wondered if she had punctured a lung before seeing her face.
Resigned.
She knew what was happening, and she knew why. She was just pushing through the pain until the inevitable happened. Her eyelids seemed to grow heavy and she started to tumble forward, caught quickly by Sebastian and pulled back against him, balancing her body against his so he could directly feel her breathing against his body and trying to keep her conscious.
"Stay awake, love, just a little longer..." He murmured, silently pleading her to stay with him for the time being. Her hand reached back over his shoulder and hooked around his neck, where her fingers dug into the skin, her breath hot against the hand he had wrapped around her waist, soft anxious murmurs in a frenzied blur of French and Enochian escaped her lips.
"S Ascha... Tu es en vie... mon dieu..."
Supporting her weight atop his own, Sebastian let one hand creep up to thread through her voloumous blonde curls, massaging and gently tugging to ease her. "It's alright darling... I'm here..." He glanced quickly at his master, silently asking for permission to tend the angel's needs. The young earl glanced over from where he was mid conversation with Doctor Arthur and sighed at the sight of the situation. "I suppose we should move this conversation elsewhere... The greenhouse perhaps." He glanced at Arthur, an impish smile on his face, "Does that suit, Doctor ?"
Arthur glanced nervously at the blonde off to the side before nodding. "Y-Yes... That's fine..."
Ciel smiled, "Wonderful. Sebastian-" he glanced at the butler, "Prepare some tea." Ciel ordered. "We'll be in the green house."
It was one of the few rare times the demon had genuine respect for the boy. Even fewer that he silently thanked him. "Yes, my lord." He said, his eyes not diverting from the angel before him. She shuddered against him, muttering incoherently and in partial sobs. Doctor Arthur cast the blonde one last worried glance before he followed Ciel away and to the greenhouse. The moment they were gone, Aurora's cries began to cease. Sebastian took her firmly by the shoulders, "Darling, please, let me-"
He stopped when he caught a glimpse of burning silver glaring back at him through puffy reddened eyes.
"You lied to me. You... Why would you do that?"
He squeezed her hand, "I will explain later." He promised, "Now please, let me help you."
She glared, teeth grinding against each other as she fought to contain her pain. "You let me think you were..." She winced, involuntarily squeezing his arm in pain. "Why?" She demanded, eyes downcast. "Why to me? Of all people, why me?" The cracking of tears in her voice made the demon's chest twist in discomfort.
"As I said, I will tell you everything. For now you have no need to worry." Aurora rolled her eyes at his cryptic tongue. "I'll worry until I've a good reason why you lied to me."
He sighed deeply, "Of course, my lady." He glanced down at her, still tucked away in his arms. "But first allow me to help you to the kitchen." Aurora scoffed, rolling her eyes as she reluctantly allowed him to help.
After a mere two and a half steps, a surge of pain wracked her body, drawing a pained cry from her and sending the angel staggering into the demon. Sebastian frowned. "What has happened to you?" He demanded, eyes scanning over her body, quick to deduce that something was indeed wrong with her. "You were not like this before-"
Aurora hissed, nails digging into his collarbone as her hand slid down from his shoulder.
"Before you threw me into disarray and made me think you were dead."
She hummed in pain. "But you have been standing by long enough to know that, haven't you?" He was quiet. "I have." He admitted. His hand rested atop hers, and he cast her what almost looked like a loving gaze. "And I am so... terribly sorry it had this effect on you." She huffed, making the effort to duck under his arm and stagger into a nearby support. "Yet you stood by and watched as I fell apart. You watched as I mourned for you. Watched as I pleaded with any god that would listen- not to take you away from me!" Another tremor ran through her and she cringed, "Because I- I have lost you before. And I cannot afford to lose you again."
She took a few more breaths, "Whether it's death..or contract.. or anything- leaving you is not an option for me anymore... And what hurts the most... is that I know I'll be put through this pain again. And I'll never know if you're really dead or not."
She glared as he made to approach her. "You told me you loved me. You vowed to the entire Angelic Council your feelings were true." She held her breath. "I can see now... that you don't." She managed to limp over to him, and jab him in the chest. "Because of your actions... I know you don't love me. And because of your actions, I am dying."
She took a breath, which quickly spiralled into a harsh cough, drawing more blood from her lungs. She winced, feeling the burning that was becoming all too familiar. Sebastian stared at her in silent horror before he pulled her to him. "Let me-"
"Let you do what exactly?" She argued, "Con me into believing you're dead?" She glared, "Or perhaps you'll stand by and take vast amusement from watching me cry?" She laughed sarcastically, clinging to him to stand upright, though her nails were beginning to dig deeply into his skin.
"Or maybe you'll watch me mourn for you so greatly that I'm willing to trade anything to be with you again?"
Her silver eyes bore into the vermillion of his, piercing the hellish colour with an angelic vigour that fought to stand prominent despite the growing ring of violet. Sebastian lowered his head in shame, and rested his head against the blonde's, mouth slightly ajar so he might breath in her sweet scent one last time.
"It was an order."
"....
That doesn't make it alright."
Aurora glanced up at him, "I know how contracts work, Malphas. You can always set parameters. Always. This just shows how little I mean to you." He glanced at her, "Regretfully, I could see his perspective on the matter. Keeping you in the dark allowed the false murder to appear real. And if you remember- of which I am certain you do, I found it excruciatingly difficult to play a corpse in your presence."
She fell silent. "You did squeeze my hand." She murmured. He nodded, "Correct. I was worried you might see through it, yet at the same time, I couldn't not comfort you." His face rested next to her own, and she sighed as she felt his breath hot on her neck. "Stop..."
Sebastian tilted her chin up. "I had no choice." Aurora turned away, pushing him back a bit. "I know it wasn't- but it doesn't change that it happened." She stilled, "By that logic the young lord could order you to have relations with someone else. Or worse."
She looked back at him, tears welling in her eyes, "Would you actually go through with such a thing? If he asked it of you?" The demon's eyes flashed, "I would take no pleasure in the order if given." At the sight of her tearing eyes, he added, "You know that you are the only one I feel anything with. Nothing can replicate that. Nothing will change that. If it is my choice, I always choose you."
Aurora sighed, "But you won't fight for me."
She turned away from him, walking down the hall towards the kitchen with a slight limp in her step. Quickly catching up to her, his eyes skimmed over her body, attempting to deduce the extent of her malaise. "Angel-"
"Forget it, Malphas." Her voice cracked, "I don't mean as much to you as I thought I did. I'll get over it." Catching her arm, he glared at her, "Two nights. Two nights I didn't sleep with you by my side, Two nights I listened to you cry yourself to sleep. Thirty four hours and forty seven minutes I watched you cope with grief."
Aurora swallowed. "You still haven't answered my question."
He was squeezing her arm now, if she were human the bone would have fractured under his grip. "I loathed the order the entire time. And I promise you, if it ever happens again, I will try to refuse the order."
She winced. "I take it you know what happens when demons refuse orders under contract?" Sebastian asked.
"Yes..." She whispered, "Yes, of course I know..."
The demon's eyes narrowed, "Then you know what happens when orders are refused." She winced, "Depending on the severity. It depends on the conviction of the order. Doesn't it?"
Sebastian sighed, tilting her chin up, "My dear, I would let myself be beaten within an inch of my life, let myself be stabbed by a death scythe- anything for you, but you can only ever imagine what happens when a demon disobeys an order of any kind." His eyes darkened, "I'm willing to disobey to an extent, but when he gives me an order, I have no control over it. It does not matter what I want. I am his butler, I live to serve."
"But- you can't just... No..."
A look of sympathy crossed the demon's face and he knelt before her. "I may be helpless in that regard, but you need to know that whatever happens, you still have me." She sniffed. "Get up. You'll hurt your knees if you kneel too long."
Sebastian smirked, "Are you calling me old?"
Aurora shook her head, pulling him to his feet, "Of course not. I just know you hate getting on your knees for people. And I don't want you to do something you hate for my sake." She smiled, cupping his face, "Now come on, the young lord will be rather annoyed with us if we wait here reminiscing any longer."
--
Aurora's legs dangled over the edge of the counter as she watched Sebastian prepare the requested tea and snacks. "Let me help." She pressed, "I can-"
"I'll manage." Sebastian said coldly, slightly rough with his preparations.
Foolish.
How did I not take her into account?
She's dying and-
A hand stopped him from breaking the teapot in his hands. "Gentle." Aurora murmured, "Ciel will be most agitated if you shatter his favourite tea set." She smiled sadly, "And now I haven't the angelic magic to repair it." She shakily took the teapot from him and poured the tea into the individual cups.
There was a long pause before Sebastian bothered to speak.
"So you're dying."
Aurora paused. She'd hoped for three words, but certainly not those. "Yes." She said, "Lucian walked in my dreams last night- if that makes any sense. He tells me I am condemned, and it is uncertain if I shall live." She smiled, "The best case scenario is another cycle of rebirth that allows me to remember more. But there is the chance I..."
His arms were around her in a second, trapping her against the countertop. His nose pressed to the back of her head, breathing in the salty scent mingled with her natural scent of lilies and lavender. He paused, a smirk forming on his lips suddenly.
"What is it?" The angel asked, voice monotone as she stacked tiny cucumber sandwiches in an elegant circa.
"I remember you used to smell strongly of mint and lavender." Sebastian said.
"And?" She asked, curiously.
His smirk widened, "Since the first time we laid together, I can no longer smell mint."
Aurora rolled her eyes, trying to hide her smile. "Idiot. Mint is a pure scent. All angels have a pure scent- it marks them proving purity."
He hummed, leaning over her shoulder, "So are you saying-?" She suddenly shoved a sandwich into his mouth. "Must you be so... how does one way- lewd?" She sighed, "If you are asking if you were my first, I should think that information obvious to you."
She sighed, "My scent changed because I became too acquainted with you."
Sebastian smirked, "This is how I remember you smelling with me." Aurora hummed thoughtfully, "I seem to remember someone smelling of rosewood and some sort of hellish scent. Tinged with cinnamon." She glanced back at him, "Though now the rosewood is much more prominent. And there is some other scent mixed in that I can't quite place."
Sebastian grinned at her, "Do you find it appealing?" Aurora sighed, "If I say yes will you let me finish these so we might bring them to his young lordship?"
She turned to face him and he stopped her. A strange form of sympathy lingered behind those dark reddish amber hues, and she sighed, cupping his face so he might look at her. "As... angry as I am that you did this... It doesn't erase centuries of love for you." She kissed him on the cheek. "Honestly, at this point we're stuck together."
Sebastian smirked, "I suppose we are, aren't we? Perhaps I should escort you straight to the Hellscape and become my mate." She smiled, "A lovely thought mon amour." She kissed him on the cheek- not denying the idea, seeming to rather shelve it for another day the demon noted.
She went back to the sandwiches, quiet.
"Something on your mind?"
She bit back a smile. He reads me like a book... He always has. He knows how I feel before I do sometimes. Aurora sighed, stepping away from the sandwiches, leaning her back against the counter and folding her arms over her chest, creating some semblance of distance between them before looking up at him in half seriousness, half curiosity.
"You will never love me the way I love you."
She took a breath before speaking again, "Not that you don't love me in your own way... It's just... You can never love me like I love you." Sebastian paused, a frown crossing his lips. "Emotion is still foreign to me, so for some time, I may not be able to properly reciprocate such feelings."
"For some time?" The angel questioned.
The demon smiled, "A long time ago, I would have deemed it impossible for a demon to feel any sort of emotion."
She watched curiously, silver eyes flickering. "And now?"
His smile widened and he leaned closer to her, chest pressed against her forearms so she could feel his beating heart on her wrist. "I believe it is not so." He got on both knees, hands rested just below her thighs. "After all the years we spent in our youth, and the years apart, there is no logical explanation to say that our kind can never learn emotion, can never feel it." He glanced at the ring on her finger and took her left hand in his. "And emotion is why I now believe this ring is no longer needed."
Her eyes widened. "What?!"
He smirked, "Rest assured, I still plan on putting a ring on that finger, but this one is... outdated. It was conceived in a bout of lust." He smirked, "I am sure that my angel would not object to a new ring? Perhaps one that compliments her eyes more so?"
Aurora hummed, "I won't say no to that..." She frowned, "But let me be clear- I'm still mad at you." The demon chuckled, "Stay mad at me for as long as you wish my dear." She frowned, "I'm quite serious, mon amour. You really hurt me this time. And as much as I'd.. love to fall back into this routine we've made, it just can't happen. Not for a while at least."
Sebastian nodded, "I understand, darling. You've no need to explain further." He let his hand lace with hers. "Rest assured, that I will be here when you have need of me." She sighed, resting her head on his shoulder. "You make it so difficult to be angry with you..."
Then she slapped him across the face, a cold stare in her eyes. "But thankfully I still retain the ability." She spun on her heel and took the sandwiches, shoving them into his right arm, then quickly grasping his left hand in hers. The demon glanced at her in confusion. "If you are so cross with me-?"
She gifted him with an annoyed sigh, carefully taking his hand and pressing his forefingers to a spot on her wrist. "Do you feel that?" She murmured. Sebastian let his hand clasp around her wrist, thumb and forefingers pressed softly against her pulse point. He could feel the slight shiver on her skin, and the frantic beating of her blood. She took a stifled breath. "I'm still processing this..."
He frowned, eyes narrowing. "You're in shock."
She nodded, letting her hand lace together with his. "Just give me a little time to adjust." Her lover squeezed her hand silently. "Very well." He swallowed, "Come with me."
Quietly, she trailed along beside him, maybe a step or two behind- Sebastian observed, but she still clung to his hand. He could feel the anxiety radiating from her like a beacon, and it gnawed annoyingly about how he'd been the cause of it. He supposed it was only natural of her to feel this way. She'd felt so much pain, and now here he stood adding more to it.
How dare he say he loves her.
His companion glanced down at their intertwined hands, squeezing his reassuringly as she felt the heat of his palm against hers. She smiled sweetly at him, despite the vast weakness in her eyes, a look that conveyed as easily as words could say: It wasn't your fault.
Only it was.
He was the sole reason for her despair. The reason she had spent the past several days sobbing until her body would no longer allow it. He was the one who hadn't considered her oath the the young master and committed mass genocide- allowing their overlapping seals to smear into one and therefore incriminate her as an asset.
Whether they liked it or not, by laws of contracts and oaths, she had played a part in the murder of the children. And because of it, nothing could be done to undo her current state.
"I'm sure that I'll be fine, Sebastian."
The faint French accent- tinged with British took him by surprise as he realised she'd stopped them. She pitied him. He scoffed, "You haven't the need to feel sorry for me, Angelica. I can manage on my own." Aurora frowned, "I don't want you to feel sorry for this. It was inevitable."
"Inevitable?"
He stared at her in some form of twisted anger bound with hurt. She winced, "I don't like admitting it either. But it was bound to happen at one point. We knew there were risks with doing this. That's why there's never been an angel and demon bound by contract and oath. It's too risky."
She sighed, "But it's a risk I would have taken again." She squeezed his hand. "Even if it means-"
"Don't."
Aurora fell silent again. "What I mean is..." She murmured, "Is that no matter what happens, I'm just happy I'm with you."
His head bowed and he mumbled, "You're going to die because of my actions. It doesn't matter-"
"If I come back this time there's a chance I might remember everything." She interrupted. "This is the only chance I have to remember everything." His eyes narrowed, burning red with anger.
"I'd rather you never remember than chance death."
She sighed and rested her head against his. "And I'd rather die than not know anything about us."
He scoffed, "That makes no sense."
She smiled, "Is love meant to?" She kissed him gently on the cheek. "It'll be okay." His hand shot to her wrist suddenly, eyes flaring red with desperation, pupils in catlike slits. "There's one option we could try."
She winced. "Making me a demoness won't change anything." She murmured, "Arguably, my genetics might not allow that and it could kill me immediately."
Aurora's hand held tight onto his, rubbing his gloved palm. "Malphas, maybe I won't really die. And I'll be back in your arms before you know I've even left." He sneered, "Rebirth still means you die. Do you have any idea how being responsible for your death makes me feel?"
Her silver eyes flicked onto the bleeding red. "How... Does it make you feel?" She inquired carefully, caressing the side of his face and pushing a lock of dark hair over his ear. He hummed, pressing into her comforting touch. "Like I'm being ripped limb from limb- slowly. But somehow, it's worse than I imagine it would be. Like... my entire chest cavity is being harvested-"
"Don't- finish that sentence." Aurora interrupted, pressing a hand over his mouth. "I don't want to be sick all over you." Her fingers toyed with his hair. "I love you, okay? Remember that." He hummed, chuckling a bit, "So you're not mad at me anymore?"
Aurora smirked, "Oh. I'm still angry. Very much so. Less than before, but still angry. The moment Doctor Arthur leaves, you and Ciel are going to get what's coming to you." Sebastian mirrored her smirk, "I'll hold you to that then."
"The young master had ordered me to keep quiet about the ordeal, I was in no way to communicate to you that I was in fact alive." Sebastian said, busily rearranging some sweets on the tray while Aurora was preparing the tea. They'd paused in the hall after another one of her episodes, having to rearrange a couple things on the tray that had been disturbed.
"He wanted to make sure he had a good performance." She murmured, "My reaction had to be genuine."
"Correct." Sebastian sighed. "You cannot possibly imagine how long I was looking for loopholes before I realised he'd thought his order through rather thoroughly."
Aurora nodded, "Most unfortunate for us." She glanced up at him, "Malphas. If he's giving you such orders that you cannot find loopholes, is that not dangerous?" She set her hand atop his. "Not just for us, but for you. How can you finish this contract if he's already finding such ways to-"
They both cringed, suddenly feeling a familiar burning from their seals. "I suppose we've been taking too long." Sebastian murmured. He took the tray in one arm before offering his hand to the blonde. He'd not enough time to blink before she was holding tightly to his limb, fingers laced tightly together, and her head pressed against his shoulder, keeping as close as she possibly could.
He made sure to walk at a slower pace, letting her keep up with him. She glanced up at him, a serious look on her face. "Please. Never do this to me again. I don't want to be put through that pain again."
Pressing a soft kiss to her cheek, he uttered softly, "I would never hurt you with ill intent, angel... I can't promise this brat won't pull a trick like this again, but know that I-"
"I know you can't exactly control what that 'brat' orders you to do," Aurora murmured, stopping where she stood, holding tight onto his hand. "But I'm not going to live like this. I don't want the potential of losing you everyday." He squeezed her hand. "Then the next time he gives me this order, I'll take his soul."
She shook her head, "It won't be enough to sustain you..."
"It'll be enough."
Her eyes searched his for a moment. There was a growing weakness within him. One she couldn't ease. If he didn't get the soul he'd been so vehemently pursuing, he'd be too weak to defend either of them. Clearing her throat, she pulled him into a gentle hug, burrowing her face under his chin, her breath hot on his neck. "No. You need to eat." Swallowing her pride, she sighed, "I can... manage. I'll just distance myself from the situation if it happens again."
Holding onto him still, she squeezed her eyes shut, willing the gnawing feeling of discomfort to go away. Noticing her tense in his arms, Sebastian frowned, "Are you alright?" She nodded briskly, "Yeah- yeah, I'm fine... Whatever happens we still have the rest of eternity, right?"
He smiled, "Yes. Of course we do." He pulled away, until his hands lingered on her own. The angel sighed, finger's squeezing tightly onto his, wincing at the feel of the gloves acting as a barrier between their bare hands.
"Can we take them off?" She whispered, "The gloves. Can we take them off? Just for now?"
He paused, watching her with some degree of concern and sympathy. Her voice cracked almost every time she spoke, and tears still ran down her face, reddening her cheeks before falling onto their gloved hands.
She squeezed again.
"Just for now?" She pleaded. "It's just us- no one else is here. Please ."
She sniffed, eyes squeezed shut- almost already feeling that she knew his answer.
Her breath hitched when she felt his hand on hers, gently grasping the finger of her glove, and slowly removing it to reveal the delicate skin underneath. Her fingers grasped his the moment their flesh was free, relishing in the feel of his skin against hers.
His slender fingers began drawing small circles on her palms, and she smiled pressing herself into him, just happy that the scent of him was no longer the stark stench of death.
"You've certainly an affinity for skin to skin contact." He teased.
She sighed, "I'm as close as I can be to you this way." She smiled, squeezing his hand. "We can be touching at any and every moment, even with gloves on. And no one would be the wiser..." She looked up at him. "I never want to be away from you. Never again. It- it's stupid, but I-"
"You don't need to explain." He was already smiling, "Never again. We'll be separated by nothing." He leaned in, his breath hot against her ear. "Not even the gods will stop us."
Aurora felt her body give an unwilful shiver. "We'll always be together..." She whispered, "Always." Sebastian's hands were warm, like a comforting hug, and his overall aura made her feel safe. The trust she had in him felt unwavered, as if he'd never obeyed the order.
She wanted to let it go. To forget it ever happened.
But she'd be naïve to do that.
She slapped his hand when he made to pull back on his gloves. "No." She said coolly. "Keep them off." He frowned, "Angelica-"
"Did I stutter? Keep them off."
He sighed, offering her his free arm, smirking as she latched onto him like a newborn babe would it's mother, and started towards the green house.
---
Aurora's bare feet slapped against the tile floor, and she was clinging more so to Sebastian, worried that she might slip on her hosiery. The demon was smirking at the sight, until she finally did slip, squeaking in surprise as she slid backwards. Before she fell too far back however, Sebastian had her caught in his free arm, balancing the tea and sweets in his other.
"Are you alright, darling?" He asked, smirk still lingering on his lips as he gazed down at the angel clinging to his neck. She hissed, "Remind me why I let you talk me into taking my heels off?!" He smirked, pulling her upright. "I figured it would be quieter." he replied. Aurora rolled her eyes. "And yet I'm falling back into your arms. I can't help but think this was a stunt to get me to ignore this entire mess."
Sebastian frowned, "I wouldn't call it a mess, my dear." Aurora glared, "What would you call it then?" She challenged, "My life was altered, my heart broken, and seeing your corpse did nothing to help the matter." She took a breath, "I was so frightened that I'd never be able to see you again. Never tell you how sorry I was, or how much I loved you- that you'd die thinking I thought the worst of you..." She wiped away the brimming tears. "I can't go through that again." She whispered, "Never. You can't ever put me through that again." She realised then her fingers were still shaking. She swallowed, leaning back into the demon. "Let's just... go to the green house..."
Sebastian let his hand lace with hers, and pressed his lips to the top of her head in an affectionate kiss. Without another word on the matter, he squeezed her hand and continued towards the greenhouse.
As they slipped into the greenhouse, they settled themselves quietly off to the side while the young earl casually explained his version of events to a flabbergasted Doctor Arthur. Where the two stood now, backs rested against the greenhouse wall, Aurora was toying with the butler's pocket watch to distract herself from the recounting of events.
She frowned at the broken watch, slowly moving the short hand with her finger. "This won't be easy to fix.." She mumbled. Sebastian smirked, "I beg to differ." Aurora sighed, "Simply using magic does not fix it."
She let her head rest on his shoulder, eyes shut and breathing in his comforting scent. He chuckled quietly, "You seem to be growing a quick affinity for my scent. I'd no idea you-" She elbowed him and smirked as he choked a bit. "Just for now." She murmured, "Remember for the past several days I've only smelt death on you."
She sighed, her fingers tight around his. "I never want that again." Her left hand reached out to cover his seal as Arthur suddenly jumped to his feet in surprise, slamming his hands down onto the table.
"What do you mean you predicted the incident would occur?!"
Sebastian smiled, "Indeed." He said, parting from the blonde, hands folded behind his back, unmarked hand clasped over his contract seal. "In fact, we also predicted that Master Siemens would probably be made a sacrifice for it."
Aurora frowned, watching him curiously, "How do you mean?" She asked. "I suspect that you probably knew there would be an incident, and that the guest of honour would be your victim, but how? Why, even?"
Sebastian glanced over his shoulder at her, "That, I will clue you in on later." He purred. Ciel rolled his eyes and huffed, "You two need to have some distance from each other. I can't stand the two of you being in the same room."
Aurora shot the boy a glare, "The only reason you haven't received a punishment yet is because we have a guest. The moment it's just us, you're going to-" Sebastian tugged her back into him before continuing. "As I was saying," he said, "We knew that Lord Siemens would die. Yet we also knew that I would die." He felt her wince against him and let the arm around her hold her closer. Aurora let her face bury into his chest as he began telling the story of how he had faked his death.
"Such a cruel master," Sebastian said, pulling Aurora from her quiet grieving. "Considering that you gave me the order despite knowing that I would be killed if I inspected the hearth." Aurora winced, fingers digging into his tailcoat, left hand moving down to rest over where the wound had been. She squeezed her eyes shut, remembering holding his bleeding body, feeling his body growing cold... She didn't realise her sadness until Sebastian's hand cupped her face, his thumb dragging over her cheek to catch her falling tears. Unconsciously, her face pushed against his hand, sniffling.
"...As I thought, I was killed by the one who came to torment my master. Earl Grey."
That made her gasp, head jolted from his chest to look at his face. "Him?" She choked, "He killed you?" Sebastian frowned at her and gently pulled her close, letting her find solace in the fact that he was alive, and never leaving her side again. Aurora couldn't make heads or tails of the rest of the conversation, too lost in her own pain. Biting down hard on her tongue until she drew blood, she tucked her face back against Sebastian, pressed over his heart and listening to the faint beating.
He's alive...
He's alive...
So when he eventually stepped away from her- not before setting her beside the table, her attention was drawn when she felt that familiar demonic aura come to life.
"The truth is... I am not human."
Doctor Arthur scrambled, stumbled over his own feet before falling to the garden tile, looking up at the butler with terror.
"One can only wonder what would happen if you were to reveal this matter..." He smirked, "I'm sure you understand, don't you?"
Aurora frowned, "Sebastian stop, you're scaring him. If you continue he'll just go into cardiac arrest." He seemed to ignore her, continuing to torment the poor man. "Let him have his fun, Aurora." Ciel said, sipping his tea nonchalantly. She rolled her eyes and strode forward, grabbing the demon by the arm and yanking him back. "Stop it." She commanded. "It does no good." He glanced at her, eyes still glowing, a look of boredom and silent pleading etched onto his face.
"I'm bored , Angelica..." He drawled, "Let me enjoy this." She narrowed her eyes, "Malphas."
Suddenly her eyes had been restored to that angelic status, full silver glowing white gold, and time had stilled. The demon's gaze faltered slightly. "Your eyes..."
She seemed to hold back a wince. "I can't hold it for long." She murmured. "Please, don't kill this man. I'm begging you."
He frowned, "And why not? It's only another pitiful human-"
"Humans did not seem so pitiful to you once in your life. Once when you were mine. When I could safely say I would have spent my entire life with you."
She paused.
"You mean you would not do so now?"
She sighed, "Malphas..."
"Tell me, Angelica. Do you want to marry me? Or has that been a dream long forgotten?"
She shook her head. "Of course I want to marry you, mon amour. It's just hard because you remember every second we spent together." She took a breath, feeling that familiar sting of heartache growing in her chest. "And I can't remember any of it."
She reached out, carefully to touch the back of his hand with her finger. "I want to spend the rest of our lives together. I want to marry you. I want so much- but it feels like I can't have that." Fat tears were rolling down her cheeks now. "Because I don't deserve you. I don't deserve you, and I hate it. Because you are all I want and it's like every time we get somewhere- we take seven steps back." Sebastian frowned, "Angel..."
She sighed, "I want a life with you. More than anything." She sniffed, "But we can't have the life we wanted." She glanced back at the still figure of Doctor Arthur behind her, then at Sebastian pleadingly, "So as a last act of love for me- please don't kill this man."
Sebastian took a few steps forward, cupped her cheek, and tilted her chin up slightly. "Why do you cry?" He murmured, calloused fingers wiping away the spilt tears. "I'm not going to kill this man, I never was."
She stared, "What?"
Sebastian smirked, "You remember how distraught the young master was when he learned there would be no sequel to Doctor Arthur's story?" She nodded, "Yes." The demon's eyes flashed and he grinned. "I'm just giving him some inspiration."
Aurora glared and stepped aside, a gentle wave of her hand diminishing the void around them, her grimacing in pain as she stepped beside him. The demon glanced at her briefly, and Arthur sputtered, "Miss! He's a-"
She looked at him then, eyes still having the soft angelic glow. "I know." She said calmly. "I've always known what he is. That's why I was so shaken." Sebastian hummed, "I think it's purely because angels of your breed are susceptible to human emotion." She sighed, "Possibly."
The angel knelt before the terrified man and sighed deeply, "Sebastian." She scolded, "You've frightened him so that he's wet himself." Sebastian bit back a smirk. Arthur trembled, "I- I'll never tell- I swear!" Aurora smiled, gently taking his hand. "Don't worry," she murmured,
"You're going to be just fine."
The writer barely had time to blink before he was suddenly home again, standing in the entrance hall of his home.
In the Afternoon...
"Did you have to show him your true form?" Ciel asked after Arthur's carriage pulled away. Sebastian smiled, setting the knocked over chair back upright. "He is a writer, if he goes through an eccentric experience, he will absolutely wish to write about it." He smirked, "Writers are those kinds of creatures."
He glanced back, "And you liked his novel, didn't you?"
Aurora hummed, glancing out the green house window. "Indeed he did. He read that magazine until it was completely worn." She sighed, "I seem to recall the tantrum when he learned there would be no continuation."
Ciel huffed. "It was okay to pass the time with. His next work will truly be something to look forward to." Aurora looked over her shoulder, "I certainly won't be delivering it to you." She said coldly. "Honestly- I don't know what either of you were thinking. Not including me in this was-"
"Could you have played the part of a grieving widow so well if we had told you?" Ciel challenged, "I thought it wise to keep you in the dark. The show you put on was excellent."
Aurora sneered, "Show? I did not put on a show! I was grieving!" She slapped away Sebastian's hand as he came to comfort her, "Don't you touch me! I'm not finished!"
She slammed her fists onto the table across from Ciel. "I can't believe you actually had the nerve to not tell me later on! If a show was all you wanted- could you not have at the very least told me in private?! You had the chance to do so!"
Ciel frowned, "I didn't see the point. I knew Sebastian would make it up to you, and he deserved a punishment for harbouring all those cats." He took a sip of tea, "Granted it was a joint effort, and so it was more fitting not to say anything."
The angel was seething. "You-" She jabbed a finger barely an inch from the boy's nose, "Will not see any sugar for the next millennia. I will see to it." She turned to glare at Sebastian, "And you- oh I might be mad at both of you- but you actually went through with it, order or no order!"
The demon sighed, "I understand-"
"How can you possibly understand anything of how I'm feeling right now?! You barely know what love is! You've said it yourself! You will never love me the way I love you!" She backed him into the corner of the room, continuing to yell.
"What I'm most angry about is that you hurt me and you can't seem to realise that!
And if you even think about trying to use that fucking tongue of yours- you can forget it. It won't work. Not for a long time!"
She hissed, "And to start proving how sorry you are- you can get all that chocolate that was just delivered and dispose of it! Little Lord Phantomhive is to have none of it! And I'll say that as a Doctor's professional opinion!"
Sebastian smiled, taking her hand and pressing a chaste kiss to it. "Of course, my angel. I'll begin straight away." He tugged her a little closer, "Should you be accompanying me?" She scoffed, "I think I trust you enough to rid of some chocolate."
A playful smirk crossed his lips as he gently brushed past her, already seeing to the request. Once he was gone, Aurora's face fell.
"You're cruel." Ciel said, "No chocolate? Pft. Maybe I won't dread Lizzie's next visit."
Aurora scowled, "I think it is a fitting punishment." She sighed, "If I die, you know he won't stay. He'll end the contract. You'll either die or be left by your lonesome." Ciel was quiet. "He told you this?"
"No. But I know him." She let a hand run over the rim of the teapot. "Demons inability to feel emotions deemed human is a curse of sorts. They are born in a world of darkness and evil, shown nothing but cruelty. Demons are not bred for happy reasons, they are bred for power." She took breath, "He is not like the others of his kind. He's grown emotion. Emotion that he doesn't understand, that I've helped him understand- and if something happens to me, he will go off the deep end."
She swallowed. "I cannot allow that day to come."
Ciel frowned, quiet for a long time, even as the butler finally returned smelling of burnt chocolate. "It is done," he purred, standing behind the blonde with a charming smile, eyes glowing dimly as his demonic power vanished behind vermillion irises.
Aurora smiled, reaching up to kiss him. "Thank you, love."
Ciel scoffed, "Get a room... Please."
Sebastian smirked, "Gladly."
Sebastian offered his hand to Aurora, helping her up when Ciel stood, as if he'd suddenly remembered something important.
"Wait- you still haven't explained Phelps' murder."
Sebastian hummed thoughtfully, "Ah, that's right. Yes, there was indeed an uninvited guest." At Ciel and Aurora's shared cry of confusion, he walked over and bent beside the table. "Since it was a bit sudden," he lifted the table cloth and pulled out a rather large shipping crate locked with a tight chain, "I had taken him to this luxury suite."
The crate was padlocked in multiple places, and Aurora quickly put an arm protectively in front of Ciel as the boy stood up to investigate.
"The killer is in there?"
"Indeed."
Ciel took a breath, "Show me what's inside."
Aurora squeezed his shoulder gently, "Are you quite sure you want him to do that?" Her eyes narrowed, "Even I cannot detect what's inside." Sebastian smiled, beginning to open the crate, "Now, now, my dear. I assure you that you don't need to worry."
Aurora hummed, "That look in your eye is making me believe otherwise."
Sebastian grinned, "Would I ever cause you harm?"
"Oi! Stop flirting the both of you! Open the crate!"
The demon chuckled, "Very well then."
Aurora screamed, pulling Ciel back as a pair of snakes shot out towards them, mouths wide open, and fangs primed to strike. The creatures were jerked back as Sebastian caught them. Aurora shivered, one arm holding Ciel, and the other propping herself up off her new place on the ground.
"A-Are you mad?!" Aurora stammered, "He could have been bit! And you know I don't like snakes!" Sebastian hummed, "I know you dislike them, not that you are frightened of them." Aurora shivered, "You know how my father's horror stories used to be. Can you imagine how he made snakes out to be?"
She looked down at Ciel, the boy sitting in her arms, eye wide at the sight of the snakes."Are you alright?" Ciel swallowed, nodding. "Fine." He agreed, getting up and then looking at the young man in the crate.
Aurora's eyes widened. "Snake? From the circus? I don't understand, what are you-"
"It's not obvious?" Ciel huffed, "He's the thirteenth man."
"Indeed." Sebastian agreed, coming over to help the blonde to her feet. "The other night when Mister Phelps passed I found him hiding in the greenhouse attempting to kill the young lord." Aurora turned to snap at the snake man. "You would try to kill a child?! Why?!" Snake mumbled against the cloth covering his mouth, and the blonde sighed, "Sebastian... Let him speak, please?" Reluctantly, the demon tugged the cloth around Snake's mouth free, allowing him to speak. "The day after Black, Snow and Smile snuck into Joker and everyone's tents- they all disappeared!" He accused, "It's definitely your fault! Says Wilde."
"That's why I followed Smile from the scent on his clothes... Says Oscar."
Snake began rambling, reiterating the entire tale of how he'd come to the Phantomhive Manor. The further he told, the redder Ciel's face grew. Aurora sighed, glancing at Sebastian, "He'll burst a blood vessel if he gets any angrier."
Sebastian smirked, "I'd think you wouldn't be so concerned for his health after the stunt he pulled." Aurora frowned, "Just because I'm angry at him about keeping me in the dark doesn't mean I care for him any less. I'm aggravated, yes. And I still adore you as much as I ever have, being angry doesn't change that."
The demon looked curious, "Is that so?" She smiled, "Of course." She pecked him on the cheek. "And I still want to marry you." He opened his mouth to answer when Ciel grumbled to them, "Those idiots... I should have expected this kind of stupidity from Prince Soma..." Aurora hummed, "I'm sure they had good intentions. And besides, maybe Snake could be of some use to us." Both earl and butler looked at her confused.
"What?" Ciel asked.
The angel smirked, "Think of it this way, gain another servant, a small army of snakes, and you keep your enemy under your thumb." Her eyes flashed, "A key strategy of battle, is it not?"
Ciel thought for a moment, then walked back to Snake who was still screaming at him.
"They called me their family! You took that from me! I could never forgive you for that! Says Wilde."
Ciel stared at him quietly, briefly remembering the brief moment he'd woken in Sebastian's arm on the way out of Baron Kelvin's manor.
Doll.
Her angry tears, curses of revenge, the pain etched into her eye, and bright red freckles burning against her skin.
He closed his eyes. "The circus group you were in had been kidnapping children in each of the places you visited on tour. We joined the troop in order to find evidence of this."
Aurora winced as she felt the Snake man's growing despair. "They were... kidnappers?" Snake whispered, voice laced with horror. As quickly as his demeanour had changed with the revelation of the troops' crimes, he spat again. "Th...That's a lie! Don't talk that kind of rubbish! Says Oscar."
" Rubbish? That might be true. They made their whereabouts unknown after that. My real identity was found out before we could obtain the evidence." Ciel looked down at him sympathetically.
"In that sense, I may have taken your peace from you. However, I wanted to save the children that were suffering because of them.
Of course, I want to save you too."
Sebastian stared wide eyed as Ciel undid the other man's bindings. Aurora chuckled, her voice akin to the soft purr of one of his felines, "Relax love. He'll be fine." He glanced over at her, the blonde snaking her arms around his right, squeezing tightly. "I trust as much," he said, "What I am more curious about is why you suggested taking Snake in. You hate snakes."
Aurora smiled, "True. I despise the creatures. But Snake's addition will help him." She smiled lovingly, "And more selfishly- the manor is in need of a footman. His addition will let us slip away more often."
Sebastian's lip quirked up in a small smirk. "You're a clever angel, aren't you?" She squeezed his arm. "Mhm. You should remember how lucky you are to have me."
His free hand came up to rest over her left, resting upon his bicep.
"Always, darling."
Aurora gave the young Earl a sidelong glance before smirking at the demon. "While he is occupied, do you suppose..?" Sebastian let his hand hook around her waist and dangle over her thigh. "Perhaps.. if we can be discreet-"
"Oh I wasn't talking about sex." Aurora's face dropped and a serious look crossed her face, "I was talking about getting our story straight before the young master decides to interrogate us."