I think I have a soul tie to negativity. A bias or curse that binds me to it. In the same way, Ruby Banes and I were bound. Neighbours and best friends, a cliche that came with living my parent's american suburban dream. We shared every secret, every smile and tear. We would trade them like currency. We told each other everything. Or atleast, I did.
Ever since we were teenagers, Ruby always joked that she wanted to die young.
"Live fast and leave a pretty corpse".
It was a mantra she would recite whenever she snuck out my bedroom window.
Whenever she drank at a party.
Whenever she broke a boy's heart or chipped the glossy red paint on her car.
Never did I think the affirmation would become a reality. Never did I think my curse would cancel out her blessings. 10 months gone and Ruby's death remains unsolved. The investigation seemed to reveal more questions than answers. The details were hazy and no one cared to clear the fog.
The Banes family was... complicated. Lawyers shot up for each and every remaining relative while the investigation was left unfunded and untouched by Ruby's very own flesh and blood. Ross Banes, Ruby's father, owned a real estate establishment in the city. Inherited from his father, Mr. Banes spent his days and nights in the centre of his work and rarely dropped in. Rihannon, Ross' wife, passed away when Ruby was four, leaving the children with their next door neighbour, me.
We clicked like a key in a lock. Ryan, her younger brother, would try to play with us, but Ruby always came up with an excuse as to why he couldn't. She would tell him to go play with Roman, her older brother, and to leave us girls alone.
But as I entered the Banes Mansion, I found no evidence of those times. There was no proof of the swimming pool days or the melting ice cream or the christmas mornings. There were just... paintings.
She was gone. Every picture frame excluded her petite smile, her smell had faded from the house, her bedroom cleared and redecorated. Her shoes were missing from the rack at the door, her clothes given to goodwill, her scholarship taken by another student. Ruby was dead, and it seemed they wanted her to stay that way.
"Can I get you a drink, Sarah?" Ryan asked, holding out a red cup as I made my way toward him through the heavy party. The foreignly familiar home was like a dream in the neon lights and bouncing floorboards. Ryan had been living here alone for the past 5 months after Roman seemingly vanished, which left the 16 year old with far too much freedom.
Parties at the Banes Mansion became a scheduled event as every weekend seemed to take place at the castle-esque home. Ryan didn't seem to mind though. I think he enjoyed the company, even though his hospitality was being taken advantage of by the various groups of teenagers that consumed the free booze.
"No thanks," I replied, taking a seat at the kitchen island. He glanced at the drink he was offering and shrugged, throwing it back in one go.
"Woah, Ryan. You ok there bud?" I asked, taking the now empty cup from his hand.
"Roman," was all he said as he leaned forward on the marble top. His hair drooped forward and covered his face as he looked down at his feet.
"What about Roman?" I asked, letting the annoyance of his name being mentioned show clearly. Roman and I didnt get along. It was as simple as that. His little disappearing act was more a relief to me than a concern.
"Well to start, he's coming home tomorrow, so that's fabulous," he said, the sarcasm dripping as he spoke. Ryan didn't hate his brother like I did, but they sure did fight, and not just verbally.
"Tomorrow! Why didn't you tell me sooner so I could run away?!" I accused, hitting him harshly as I spoke over the booming music.
"I only found out today," he replied, rubbing his shoulder. "And I'm not finished. It gets worse," he replied, a playful annoyance surfacing.
"What could possibly be worse than having to live next door to the devil," I countered, walking past him to retrieve a juice box from the fridge.
"Going to school with him," he said and I felt my brain momentarily shut down. Nope. No way. No. That was all I could think. It was like the seven stages of grief were kicking in again and I was being jolted into the confusing grip of denial. Roman was only a year older than me and had taken a gap year to travel around Italy. He broke as many yachts and cars as I dont doubt he did hearts, ignoring his fathers dreams of him attending College. Avaness College to be exact. My college, well, in a week that is. That's when semester starts and I had been so excited.
Had. Not so much anymore.
Avaness was almost as ancient as it was collossal. The Campus was like a castle, the old bluestone walls covered in thick, luscious vines of ivy and creeping roses. I had never thought Roman would oblige to his father's request and enrol at the pristine school and so it seemed like a safe choice. I had worked extremely hard throughout senior year to get in, and it seems Roman was only accepted because of his father. Because of his family.
I scoffed dramatically as I quietened my frustration.
"You're joking right?" I asked, waiting for him to laugh or give any clue he was pulling some foolish prank. I closed the fridge aggressively when he did no such thing.
"I wish," he said earnestly as he took the apple juice from my outstretched hand, poking in the plastic straw and letting his eyes wander away from the conversation in a subtle defeat. Drunk teenagers filtered in and out the kitchen like a slow breeze and I felt the need to be alone. Either that or punch something. I couldn't tell. Maybe both. My hatred for Roman wasn't completely sincere. He didn't ruin my life or taint my reputation, I had no desire for revenge. Rather his stubbornly persistent character flaws drove me to quiet insanity. I don't think I had ever had a decent conversation with the man in the almost 14 years I had known him. And for some reason, I had a desire to. But with every insult or remark he threw at me, I felt more and more disappointed at the missed opportunity of friendship he had so carelessly disregarded. I would never tell anyone this though. It was foolish and yet the disdain I held for the arrogant snob was sacred. It was a part of Ruby and I's story. Innocent best friends, laughing and singing and dancing through the hardships of life, making fun of older brothers for pure entertainment.
And I was not ready to remember her in any other way.
I excused myself from the party after quickly discovering I was the only official adult there and made the short walk back home. That night I studied my memories of Roman. His scowl, his voice. Ryan and I had remained friends, in fact we had become even closer since Ruby's death. I adopted the role of the young cool aunt with ease, but Roman hid throughout it all. To be honest, I hadn't seen him properly in about 2 and a half years. He disappeared in his father's black bentley with a promise of good reason and simply hadn't been heard from. Until now.
Next Chapter Teaser
Roman's POV:
Being 'psycho' is as much a burden as it is a gift, as much a curse as it is a blessing.
But only if you can control it.
The staff approached with a slow pace, with soft words and calm tones, with a needle in hand, with handcuffs, with tasers. And I let them. This was the fun part, the build up of tension that lasted just long enough so I could scare them into thinking I wouldn't oblige. The fear on their face inspired me. They feared me. I was supposed to be nothing but another patient, but my control was evident to them. I knew my emotions, I knew how to control them and they knew that. It helped that my family owned the hospital, and therefore, their careers. How I wished I could stay here forever, but I had plans that relied on my freedom and other's trust in me. These things I could not maintain if I remained here. And so, as they handed me my plastic bag of 5 month old cigarettes and 'safety hazards', I gave The Redwood Psychiatric Hospital my blessings. I blew a kiss to the ancient building from the back seat of my father's bentley as we drove out the gated fence. Ofcourse, Father was absent from the driver's seat. Rather, our family driver, Jacque, replaced his untouched place at the wheel, the familiar rimless glasses resting on the tip of his crooked nose. I had grown to appreciate this about my relationship with my father. He held no compassion towards me, his eldest son, and in return, I owed him nothing.
"Where to? Home?" Jacque asked as we turned onto the freeway.
"The Banes house," I corrected him. "That place was never home," I continued, rolling down the window to feel the fresh air. "And it never will be." Jacque peered at me in the rear view mirror and gave a nod, holding back a smile. "How I missed you and your dramatics, Roman," he joked as he changed lanes and I felt my own mood lift at the sound of his hearty chuckle. "Wish I could say the same," I replied, keeping a straight face. He let out a laugh, dismissing my tone, and I let a smile fall through. I had indeed missed him. Almost as much as I had missed Ruby...
A/N
Thank you, thank you, thank you, for reading my first chapter!!!!
Hope it was enjoyable :)