XXVIII
"ZURA-nii! I thought that you're not going to go through this one? You're hurt, for heaven's sake!"
"Shizuku, I'm fine. I already recovered. See?"
The bloodied bandage that peeked out from Katsura's armor was enough for even an eight-year-old Shizuku to know that he wasn't fit to fight another battle as long as he had that on him. The barely eighteen-year-old Katsura chuckled at the girl when she huffed at him.
"I'm not stupid, Zura-nii." Shizuku frowned deeply, her small hands resting on her hips as she looked up at the tall male. "If Tatsu-nii's here, he'll already be telling you to stay down while pulling you back. Though, I doubt that you would actually listen to him if he were to really be here."
Katsura just chuckled at her as if he wasn't just shot seven times in various parts of his body only three days ago. The girl resisted the urge to hit the taller square in the shin.
"You don't have to worry about me, Shizuku. Just worry about the others, alright? Although I agree that Tatsuma probably would do that, you're right; I wouldn't listen to him anyways. We'll head out in the morning." He said with a smile. Shizuku knew that he meant well with that smile, as if he was telling her that she didn't feel anything and that she was fine. The girl knew how well built that guy's body is, but she still couldn't help but worry for him.
Eventually, with little to no influence on the taller male with how young and small she was, Shizuku just gave up and let Katsura go out of the makeshift infirmary that they had in the main base. The rest of the helpers that were around berated Katsura when he went out of the tent, but like Shizuku, they couldn't exactly stop him from going. It was a war, after all, and it wasn't like the enemy's going to wait around for them to strike.
"Seriously, ever since Tatsu-nii left the battle, they've been pushing themselves to the limit." Shizuku muttered as her eight-year-old brain got crunched with a headache already forming. The people there often asked whether or not she really was an eight-year-old because of how she was acting. Shizuku never really thought about it before. It was as if she just matured earlier than others.
"I get that it's a war, but still." She muttered to herself as she stacked up the small boxes of gauzes by the cabinet at the end of the makeshift infirmary.
"Just because you guys are the strongest of the strong, doesn't mean it's alright for you to go all out only to die because you didn't' take care of yourselves when you had the chance."
"Are you still sad because of Sakamoto-san leaving?' one of the older helpers that were around asked. By that time, they were only three people inside that infirmary. There was a sleeping and heavily wounded soldier at the end of the small tent and the one attending to him, a fifteen-year-old girl named Kiko, looked at Shizuku with soft, light brown eyes.
"No, I'm actually alright with it. He has an injury, after all, and I completely understand." Shizuku replied as she shook her head. "But it's just that why do I keep having the feeling that our three remaining generals are feeling the need to up their game just because one of the four already retired. Yes, I know that Tatsu-nii has an influence as being one of the four generals and him leaving left a hole in the defense, but still...." Her voice trailed off before she spoke again. This time, in a much softer voice than before.
"The war's about to end and why do I feel like they're not going to stop until one of them actually dies? I feel like that's they're true objective for some reason."
"Well, Gintoki-san is like that so that's not new for him. But we all know that it's just because of his personality." Kiko replied with a chuckle. "The other two are probably just thinking the same as him. That's not new, either. It's the perfect definition of 'Monkey see, monkey do.' You know that better than anyone, Shizuku-chan."
"I do." Shizuku replied in a muffled voice as she looked at the blood-colored and bloodstained ground.
"I do know that, but I don't like it. It's bad enough that I probably won't see one of my closest friends anymore. Who knows what Tatsu-nii's doing out there in the open, away from all of us without any contact?"
"You know, he did ask you to come with him." Kiko replied softly, turning in her chair to fully look at Shizuku. "When he left, he asked you and I believe the other three told you to follow him, too, right? That way you'll be out of the conflict area."
"Yeah." Shizuku replied with a sigh. "But.... I didn't want to leave.... Especially when..." her voice trailed off.
Kiko gave a small hum in understanding without Shizuku ever finishing her sentence. "I mean, if I were in the same situation, I wouldn't want to leave, either. You don't want to found out from other, irrelevant people if either of the three died, huh?"
The younger girl nodded weakly. "But I also feel guilty. What if I really won't see Tatsu-nii anymore? He's just as important to me as the other three."
"Are you sure that you won't see Sakamoto-san anymore, though? That's guys' smart. He'll probably come up of ways to meet with you again. All you have to do is to believe that you will all survive this whole ordeal and the five of you will be together again."
"I don't know. I just...." Shizuku's voice thinned out once again. "I just have this feeling. A very bad one. I don't know. I don't even know what it means."
Kiko sighed before she gave a small smile to the younger girl. "Just trust in the three, Shizuku. You know that they're not going to die. After the war is over, all three of you can go back to the city or the province once again with no one to bother you. Who knows, maybe you'll see Sakamoto-san in the middle. That guy's not going to let anyone or anything kill him."
Shizuku was quiet for a little while before she sighed, eventually giving in. Truthfully, she didn't even know why she go the idea of one of their three remaining generals dying, but the thought was certainly in her head. Deciding that she wasn't going to think about it anymore, she just gave a weak smile towards Kiko. It was probably obvious how fake it was, but the older girl certainly did not comment anything about it.
They have their own problems with the whole ordeal with the war. Their only purpose is to help the injured. Any more than that, they're useless. They can't fight, they can't help with tactics, they can't be of use for anything else except for being helpers and pseudo-nurses and -doctors. Shizuku's alright with that.
At least they were good for something, right?
In the end, the girl just let the topic go and continued to work with her small eight-year-old body and limbs.
The main base is a busy area despite being away from the frontlines. The infirmary, even more so as it was situated at the very back of the compound – emergency tents were placed at the very front to help those who were just coming in and they would be transported to the infirmaries at the back if they were stable enough. There was still blood splattered around and dead bodies piled up at every corner – Shizuku tried to pretend that they weren't there – but it was most certainly unlike the frontlines of the battle. OF course, there was the occasional bombings and attacks, but they were protected there. Shizuku had nothing to worry about.
But the fear was still there, no doubt.
Night comes along and it was normal for Shizuku to spend her time over at the other makeshift infirmary tents with the other helpers. They did whatever they could, they never complained about anything. Again, Shizuku was alright with anything just as long as she could help in any way that she can. There's only so much that an eight-year-old could do, after all. She didn't even eat dinner than night, but frankly, she didn't even care.
As long as she was moving.
Even when she was already tired, she had to move.
That was the only thing she was good at.
When morning came rolling in, Shizuku, like countless other times before, waited by the shrine gates and waved at the soldiers heading out to war. Some of them waved back at her, some of them just looked and gave a smile. Others simply ignored her.
The three remaining top generals were the last ones to walk down, as usual.
"We'll be back." All three of them said with a small smile over their shoulder as they looked at Shizuku standing on top of the stairs.
One of them reached over and ran a hand through Shizuku's hair and comfortingly placed his hand over her cheek. The girl instinctively leaned in to the touch.
A few seconds later, she just weakly smiled back, making sure to make it look as genuine as possible to avoid suspicions of how tired she really was, and continued to wave them away.
All of the soldiers heavily wrapped with armor slowly walked down the stairs with their hands at the hilts of their katanas as if they were afraid that an ambush was going to happen at any time. They continued to walk without talking to each other that much.
Shizuku waited for a few minutes more after they troops were out from her sights before her smile slowly faltered and she lowered her arm.
"Idiots." She muttered as she looked blankly into the space of the empty stairs.
"At least say goodbye. You don't know whether or not you're going to come back."
Just as she was turning around to walk back inside the compound, Shizuku could be imagining it, but she could've sworn she heard the sounds of small bells ringing in a distance.
Maybe she was just tired.
"Are you sure that you should be up from your bed like that?"
Shizuku looked over her shoulder from where she was standing in front of the window and saw Kusahara just coming through the door in his dark kimono and blue and white haori. The older closed the door behind him just as he fully entered.
"I'm fine now." The girl replied as she looked back outside the tall glass windows, watching the varying sizes of ships float in the sky as the terminal was finally starting to light up again. It was in the middle of the night, so the lights were prominently seen from where she was standing, high up on the building that she has been on since the night before.
"Did Matsudaira-san call?" the girl asked without looking behind her, her hand rubbing away the itch that was forming under the greyish cloth of her hospital kimono.
"Yeah." Kusahara replied from behind her. She didn't need to turn to know that he was sitting on the chair right beside the girl's bed. "He asked how you are. I told him that you're fine. You'll probably be discharged tomorrow if nothing comes up until then."
"Did he say anything to Kondou-san and the others?" Shizuku asked as she fully turned around and began walking towards her hospital bed. "Matsudaira-san, I mean."
"I'm not actually sure." Kusahara shook his head as he stood up and helped tuck Shizuku under her sheets. The girl settled on the mattress with her back against the headboard and the covers over her legs. "Gintoki-san was here, by the way."
Shizuku's ears perked at the sound of her best friend's name. "And I'm guessing they didn't let him in?"
"Well, what do you expect?' Kusahara asked with a sigh. "This is a government hospital. He's not even allowed to enter through the front door."
Shizuku hummed at that.
The building that they were in is a government hospital, just as Kusahara said. Not anyone can enter and not anyone can get admitted. Shizuku was admitted there through Matsudaira because he said he didn't trust the lower-end hospitals, whatever that meant. Either way, Shizuku really didn't need to be admitted but because she can't really say no to the Chief-of-Police, she just followed along with the order and let herself be admitted there.
Well, they have nice rooms so it was a win, either way.
"Did you catch up with them?" Shizuku asked Kusahara after a while.
"I didn't catch him on the act. The receptionist just told me about him being here." The older replied with a shake of his head. "He said he was pissed, too."
Shizuku closed her eyes and leaned back on the headboard.
"I really should apologize to him again. I've put him through a lot. If Zura-nii was here and he knew, he would probably throw a nagging fit at me."
"That is true." Kusahara hummed. "Hijikata-san and the others, too. He seemed pissed when he saw that you were getting yourself in trouble. He's doing a good job in looking after you, to be honest."
"Are you sure that's not because he's just curious about who we are?" Shizuku asked.
"Now that's just a hurtful assumption, Shizuku." Kusahara frowned. "Especially coming from you."
He leaned forwards on his chair and placed his forearms on his thighs.
"We talked about this, Shizuku. You're safe here. After seven years, no one will come after you anymore. Even more so with the Shinsengumi and Gintoki-san with you. You're backed up on all sides."
Shizuku gave a long sigh and opened her eyes. "I know." She said as she shook her head.
Kusahara's right.
She was safe.
As long as he was there and she was with the others, she's safe.
She's safe.
There was a sudden, sharp jolt at the back of both people inside the room, both of them having the same thoughts run through their heads.
A pause lingered in the air as both occupants started to blankly stare at each other.
Nothing was said, but when Shizuku sighed and fixed herself on the bed, Kusahara stood and went towards the door, opening it fully and surprising all of the people outside of the room.
Four uniformed Shinsengumi officers suddenly backed away from the door, pressing their backs on the wall of the hallway opposite of Shizuku's room, all clearly embarrassed for being busted because of eavesdropping.
Shizuku resisted the urge to give out a chuckle at the sight when she leaned forwards to see what was happening.
"Kondou-san, you know you could just knock, right?" Kusahara said to the person who was closest to the door.
"K – K – Kusahara-kun.... How did you......" Kondou stuttered, pointing at the younger male, who just answered by moving to the side, leaving the door wide open and clearly indicating that he was letting them in.
"We don't bite." Shizuku added from where she was sitting on the bed and chuckled. "Though, Nori-san probably would."
"Shizuku, I will throw you out the window."
"It's true, though."
"Why are you like this, Shizuku?"
The girl chuckled again and leaned back against the headboard.
Without saying anything, the four Shinsengumi officers went inside and the first thing they saw was Shizuku smiling at them as she sat on her bed.
"Hi." The young girl waved sheepishly at them before she gestured them to come closer.
The door gently closed behind them all.
"How much did you hear?"
The question seemed to throw the officers aback as the Shinsengumi looked behind them and saw Kusahara standing there with his hands crossed in front of his chest, giving off a dark and ominous vibe.
A roll of tissue suddenly collided with his head.
"Nori-san, why are you intimidating them?" Shizuku laughed from her spot.
"What?" the older asked as he picked the roll up from the floor before he went to stand next to Shizuku's bed, looking at the four officers on the opposite side. "I thought it was fitting. You started the chapter with something so serious and I was already dreading the lack of comedy."
"You're not even comedic, Kusahara-san." Okita suddenly piped.
"Alright, you're the one I'll be throwing out the window first."
Shizuku had to pull on Kusahara's kimono to prevent him from advancing in on Okita on the other side of the bed. The older got out of her grip and had a sudden showdown with the brunet officer and surprisingly, they were quiet – they were literally just staring at each other. Shizuku eventually just ignored them.
"Anyways, what are you doing here, Kondou-san?" she asked as she looked at the remaining officers beside her.
"Just to check up on you." Kondou replied as he pulled out a paper bag from behind him. Shizuku didn't even notice that he was holding something when he came in. "Anyways, this is for you. There are some for Kusahara-kun, too."
"You didn't have to get us anything, Kondou-san." Shizuku replied as she watched the older place the paper bag on the mattress.
"Oh, don't worry about it." Kondou chuckled as he pushed the paper bag towards the younger girl. "It's something small. You always help up us so we're sort of returning the favor."
Not having the heart to refuse, Shizuku accepted the bag and peered inside.
There was a small square cake there, snugly fit inside a clear box. By the looks of it, it was a simple chocolate cake.
"Thank you, Kondou-san." Shizuku said with a genuine smile on her face, looking up at the older male.
"It was Yamazaki's idea." Kondou sheepishly chuckled, gesturing to the dark haired male beside him. "He's also the one who picked it out."
"Really, thank you." The girl chuckled as she watched Yamazaki nod and give a nod.
"Now, could the two of you just stop staring at each other, please?" Shizuku suddenly said as she turned to look at the two who were still staring at each other.
"You really do look like the younger Kusahara." Okita commented, his eyes not leaving Kusahara's.
"I have a name, you know, Okita-san." Shizuku called from her bed before she sighed. "They're going to like that for a while." She said as she turned to look at the other officers.
"By the way, I heard this from yesterday." Hijikata suddenly said as he crossed his arms over his chest. "How did you know that we were looking into you?" he asked.
By some miracle, Kusahara pried his eyes away from Okita and walked towards the foot of Shizuku's bed.
"I've been snooping around." He said as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. "I've trailed you, guys, too, since the day I heard you talking about us."
"Wow, you're even better than Yamazaki." Okita commented with slight amusement in his voice, looking at Yamazaki beside him. "He followed you around, too, but he never got a solid lead because he always loses your trail."
"That's because we know that he's been following us." Shizuku answered with a smile directed at Yamazaki. "Sorry, Zaki-san, but you may be the best spy in the Shinsengumi, but we could feel your presence from half a hundred meters away."
"Just like how we know that Gintoki-san and the Yorozuya are here, right now." Kusahara casually took the broom in the corner of the room and poked the ceiling with the tip, causing it to crack and collapse, sending dust and debris everywhere.
"Yorozuya!" Hijikata gasped when the dust cleared and he saw three bodies twisted awkwardly on the floor, right where the ceiling fell.
"Shinsengumi!" Gintoki sarcastically replied as he dusted himself off. He immediately banged his head against Hijikata's and like usual, they started verbally fighting with each other. Behind them, Okita and Kagura also started to fight among themselves.
"China, I thought you left?"
"What? Are going to miss me?"
"I'm going to miss wanting to kill you, yes."
Yamazaki, Shinpachi and Kondou just sighed and tried to pull the four of them apart. The one that actually made them stop was Shizuku's laugh.
"It's really entertaining to watch you." She said with amusement. The two pairs suddenly stopped getting on each other's throats but they kept sneering at each other.
"Gin-san, what are you doing sneaking into a government facility?" Shizuku asked as she crossed her arms over her chest. "I would've told you, eventually." She said mostly to herself, but even from almost across the room, she knew that Kusahara heard her.
"Well, can you really blame me?' Gintoki replied as he dusted himself off once again. "I can't stand having my best friend disappear off in the hands of corrupt government officials."
"Hey!" Hijikata started.
"Toushi, don't' make a scene here." Kodnou said in a calming voice probably in attempt to dampen the fire blazing in Hijikata's eyes.
Hijikata scoffed.
Gintoki just hummed.
"Well, now that you're all here, why not tell them something, Shizuku?" Kusahara suddenly suggested as he walked towards the side of Shizuku's bed, towards the spot that was closest to the teal haired girl.
"I don't see why not." Shizuku softly sighed.
"Until what part are you going to tell them?" the older teal haired male suddenly asked from where he was standing.
"Just enough." The younger replied as she looked at her sheets, not meeting the others' eyes.
Kusahara sighed just hummed.
"Start when you want, Shizuku."
The girl sighed.
The first thing that Shizuku noticed when she opened her eyes was the light coming from up ahead. It was so bright that she had to squint to actually see anything. It slightly hurt her head because of how bright it was, but at the same time, it was warm, like she was getting wrapped with a warm blanket.
Yet, oddly, her limbs felt numb, as if she didn't have limbs in the first place.
"Don't move around too much, kid."
There was a voice beside her. It sounded like it was only a couple of feet away. From the sounds of it, it was a man speaking to her. The voice was soft, almost inaudible but she could hear his words clearly.
"You're still weak. Don't exert yourself too much. Your body will collapse on you."
Shizuku slowly blinked repeatedly. Her back felt a little warm, but not comparing to her front. It felt like she was lying on some sort of board or something. She stayed like that for a while, staring at nowhere because she couldn't see anything with the bright light blocking her view.
A second later, a shade was being placed over her head. Upon closer inspection, it was a book casting the shadow to shield her from the bright light.
"How are you feeling?" the same man asked, his voice obviously sounding nearer now. "Make small movements if you can't speak."
Shizuku tried to open her mouth, but no words came out so she just settled with moving her arms up and down. She was surprised that she even felt them. Only a few seconds ago, they felt nonexistent.
"Well, it's nice to know that you can still understand me." The man said with a sigh. For a while, Shizuku thought that the man was smiling because of how he sounded when he spoke to her.
"Sleep more, if you want. You still have a lot of time to recover. We're not going anywhere." The man continued. He sounded like he was adjusting his position from where he was.
Shizuku slowly attempted to open her eyes again in order to make out a scene in her head. It took a while, but when she finally did manage to open her eyes – although only half-way – she saw the pale hand holding the book about a foot and a half away from her head.
"W.... who....?" She managed to croak out as she looked up and saw the man's face for the first time.
He was sitting about a foot away from Shizuku's head. The dark kimono that he was wearing was greatly contrasting with the brightness of the surroundings – although Shizuku slowly managed to figure out that they were inside a small shack or cabin as the time passed by – and his slightly messy teal hair was strikingly similar to Shizuku's own teal hair.
Olive eyes looked down at her when the man moved his head.
"So, you're fully awake, huh?" the man asked. "You don't want to go back to sleep?"
Shizuku squinted her eyes again as she felt tears pool at their sides. Without even realizing why, she was already crying.
".... Nii....?"
The man blinked and gave a small smile, but his eyes didn't smile at all – though, that was probably Shizuku's eyesight going blurry because of the tears.
"I'm not your brother, kid." The man said with another smile a little bigger than the one he gave before. "I only look like you, but I'm not related to you. Though, if anything, you should confuse me for yourself. Ignore the, you know, the fact that I'm a guy."
Shizuku sniffed and tried to reach up to wipe her tears away – she didn't even know why she was crying – but her arms felt heavy again. Either the man realized this or he just felt bad for Shizuku because he reached over with his unoccupied hand and wiped Shizuku's tears away with his thumb.
"Don't cry on me, kid. You shouldn't be crying when you just woke up. You'll lose all the strength that you gained by sleeping." The man said with a smile. Though now, his eyes were also smiling.
Finally gathering strength to open her mouth, Shizuku spoke in a hoarse voice.
"Who...?" was the only thing that she uttered out before she felt her voice deplete once again.
The man was silent for a moment as he continued to look at Shizuku.
He smiled once again.
"You can call me Noriyasu, okay? No last name, just plain Noriyasu. Nice to meet you, kid."
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