Screwball grunts aggressively going up and down as he does push ups shirtless in his cell, the cell opens as a little pig mutant in a guard uniform slowly walks in with handcuffs shaking nervously
Screwball looks up seeing the ground, he examines him up and down with a scoff "You good porky? Ya look like your a long way from home." Screwball smirks standing up showing off his puffed out muscular chest and slightly all height "Dont ya got a house to build or something?" Screwball snorts
A large warehog guard comes in the doorway with a frown "Ya coming with us scum!"
"And if I refuse." Screwball leans on the wall with his arms crosses raising an eyebrow
"Either you come willing or we'll drag ya." The warthog huffs "You're choice."
Screwball looks between the two guards debating on whether to fight or not, Screwball rolls his eyes turning around putting his hands on the wall "You're lucky I'm bored."
.............................................
Screwball walks handcuffed with the guards passing by a couple of doors until they finally reach one
Dr Chimazlie
Psychologist
"Whoa Whoa Whoa! I ain't seeing no shrink!" Screwball looks at the guard with a glare
"Think of this way you can talk to this doctor or you go back to your cell and rot."
Screwball growls outnumbered mummbing angrily to himself "Yeah That's what I thought." The guard smirks "Oh and before I forget-." He pulls out a metal collar putting around Screwball's neck "Gotta make sure you don't hurt the doctor, have fun!" The guard slaps Screwball on his back hard making him wince in pain stumbling forward as he walks away
"Stupid collar! Stupid doctor! I don't wanna be here!" Screwball mumbled angrily to himself as he turns the knob entering the office
Screwball enters the office "This is a cheerful looking office." Screwball grumps looking around the office a chimpanzee wearing square glasses and a yellow button down shirt with a plaid bow tie "Ah you must be the inmate." He takes his glasses off setting it off to the side of the desk
"And you must be the one who doesn't understand sarcasm." Screwball rolls his eyes taking a seat at the chair in front of the desk putting his feet on the desk crossing them "Listen I don't wanna be here and you don't wanna be here so let's just take this moment shut up, and sit in silence for a hour."
"That won't be necessary, I want to help you." Dr Chimazlie gives Screwball a small smile opening up a file on his desk "Why don't we begin tell me, what species are you for the record?"
"I'm part of species who's specializes in being incredibly awesome." Screwball flexes his muscles "Unlike you." He laughs to himself but it is cut short when he gets a shock from his collar "Yeow!!" He yelps in pain falling backwards on to the ground
"I take my job very seriously Mr Screwtonagus and I expect you to do the same." Dr Chimazlie gives him a deadpan look he clicks a pen ready to write "Now .. what species are you."
Screwball rubs the back of his neck looking the doctor up and down "F-Full blood demon." He slowly sits back in his seat
"How old are you?"
"Nunya"
"Nunya?"
"Yeah as in Nunya business."
"Do you always make jokes to dodge questions?"
"Do you always act like ya got a banana up ya-"
The comment is cut off when Screwball cringed at the shock of the collar "Agh! Man!"
He scoffs getting up from the chair turning his back to walk away "This is stupid!! I ain't got time for this!! Guard!!" He calls for the guard to take them back to cell as he reaches for the door
"I see here you had a wife .. what was her name?"
Screwball freezes as his eyes grow wide, he looks back at the doctor who sits at his desk patiently
"Her name is ... w-was ... Amethyst ...... her name was Amethyst."
"Such a beautiful name. What was she like?" Dr Chimazlie asked curious
"She was incredible!!" Screwball smiles happily with joy "She was kind and smart, funny, and just down right gorgeous!!" Screwball could feel his cheeks getting hot as he rubbed the back of his neck "Hehe it's funny I can still remember the first day I meet her like it was yesterday."
.............................................
"Stop! Stop! Thief!" A gem solider shouts as four soldiers chase after a young adult looking Screwball who is running at full speed with a cupcake in his hand that was half bitten
"You guys really suck at the game tag!" Screwball snorts jumping over a guys fruit cart as a soldier catches up with him, he pulls out a metal spear from his gem that was on the side of his neck and throws it
It gets caught in the back of Screwball's shirt making him stick to the wall, Screwball reaches behind him trying to unhook but looks to see the guard right in front of him
"Alright you got me." Screwball gives a fanged smiles shrugging his shoulders "But let me ask you something whats white and red all over?"
"What?" The guard asked annoyed, he got his answer when his underwear gets stretched over his head "AAgh!" He tries to pull if off as his face turns red in anger
"You with you underpants over your head!" Screwball laughs holding his side as he runs away "Haha sucker!"
"He's a sorcerer!" A solider points in disgust
Screwball looks back to see how far away the soliders are and looks back in front of him seeing an old lady walking ahead with a small cart. His eyes pop out of his as he tries his best to stop his feet so he doesn't bump into her, he trips over his own feet and tumbles to the ground rolling like a bowling ball nearly messing her
He crashes into a stand of bluish purple like chickens, the birds squawk flapping their wings freaking out as Screwball lays on the ground covered in feathers he lets a sneeze
He looks up to see all the soldiers that were chasing him in front of him
"Ummmmm can we call it a truce?" Screwball smiles big hoping they would let him go, they all point their swords at him making him quickly put his hands up in the air in surrender
"Guess not."
.............................................
"So you were captured?" The doctor listened
"Yep and that's when I meet the love of my life." Screwball sighs in remembrance as hearts popped all around his head "What am I doing this flashback requires a musical number!"
"Mr Screwtonagus I don't think that would be appropriate-"
"Too late! I'm singing anyway!!"
.............................................
by Original Broadway Cast of Hamilton and Phillipa Soo
Ooh, I do, I do, I do, I do (hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey)
Hey! Ooh, I do, I do, I do, I do (Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey)
Girl, you got me helpless
Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit
I'm helpless
Down for the count, and I'm drownin' in 'em
I have always been the type to try be in the spotlight
Screwball snaps his fingers standing in a single light popping his collar trying to look cool
I was just being a rebel had my hair looking just right
Screwball makes a comb appear as he combs his spike hair, the comb gets stuck, he tries hard to pull it out but a solider grabs him
Handcuffed and dragged into a room
Screwball cringed at the tight handcuffs around his wrist as his forced to walk to the thrown room, he walks in to see Queen Diamond and Onyx looking at him in disgust
Then I saw you and my heart went, "Boom!"
Screwball turns to see Amethyst on her thrown looking down at him with wonder and curiosity with her big purple eyes
Screwball could feel his face getting as red as his hair, his eyes turned into heart as he got a dopey smile on his face
Tryin' to catch your eye from the side of the thrown room
Screwball breaks the chain of the cuffs as he runs around as the guards chased them, he does a cartwheel going into a back flip in the air as two guard slam into each other
Everybody's failing to catch me anytime soon
Dodging guards doing just fine
Screwball does a back flip landing in crotched position
Looked up at her and thought
"Yo, this one's mine" (ooh)
Screwball smirks dashingly, he licks his fingers fixing his eyebrows
I made my way across the room to you (ooh)
Screwball uses his legs like a pogo stick springing up in the air towards Amethyst, he lands in front of her landing on one knee making her jump a little in surprise
And I got nervous thinking
"What's she gonna do?" (Ooh)
Screwball clearly sweating bullets swallow the nervous lump in the throat
I grab you by the hand
Screwball musters up the courage and grabs Amethyst hand putting it in his looking into her beautiful eyes
I'm thinkin', "I'm through" (ooh)
Screwball rolls his eyes at himself, why would he think this would work she'll probably slap him across the face
Then you smiled at me
Amethyst gives him a big o'l smile with a blush spread across her cheeks
And suddenly I'm helpless
Screwball blushes with a happy smile as heart popped around him
Oh, look at those eyes (look into your eyes)
The two just stared at each other lost in each other's eyes like a sea of love as the two blushed
And the sky's the limit
I'm helpless (I know)
Down for the count and I'm drownin'
Onyx grabs her sister's hand glaring deadly at the demon prince, Screwball snaps his finger as a banana split in a bowl fell in Amethyst lap, he jump high landing on the chandelier swinging back and forth before doing a front flip standing into the window he turns leaning his back on the castle wall
Helpless (I am so into you)
Look into your eyes (I am so into you)
Screwball bounces his shoulders side to side with joy he opens as his pupils turning into hearts with a dopey smile on his face
And the sky's the limit
I'm helpless
I know I'm down for the count
And I'm drownin' in 'em
Screwball puts his hands on his chest where his heart would be and melts like butter down the wall
"So are you gonna tell me your name or do I have to call you mister criminal?" Amethyst crosses her arms with a smirk
Screwball chuckles "I'm Screwball Screwtonagus the lll." He jabs a thumb to his chest in pride, he looks to see her making an confused face with her eyes crossed and her cheeks puffed which he thought was the most adorable face he had ever seen
"But my friends call me Screwball. He gives her a wink
Suddenly there's a scream coming from the woods getting their attention "What was that?" Amethyst looked concern into the trees
"Let's find out." Screwball smirks grabbing her hand and dragging into the woods
Two years later
I'm settled in nicely
Now my love gets bigger whenever you spend time with me
Screwball walks down the hall of the temple filled with love
How to keep you my life and then I hear em
Screwball ears twitched at the sound of chattering at the room in front of him, he leans against to wall poking an ear out to hear more clearly
Before you it he'll propose and she'll marry him!
Two women squeal in the room with their hands together jumping up and down
Ah Ha!
Two weeks
I'm a flower stressing
Palm sweating heart beating
Thinking about your blessing
I'm dying inside thinking it'll be fine
And I'm trying not to cry
Cause there's nothing that love can't do
Screwball stands in the giant flower tugging at his collar as steams comes, he sweats nervously gripping the box in his left hand
The flower opens and I see you
He feels rumbling underneath and flower opens he sees Amethyst standing in front of him on the balancing with a surprised look on her face
It was now or never
I get on one knee thinking we're though
Screwball nervously gets on one knee and opens the box revealing the ring with the giant red jewel
Amethyst gasps putting a hand over her chest, Screwball sweats bullets on his forehead afraid she'll say no
But then you smile and say 'I do'
Tears appear in her eyes as she looks at him with the biggest smile and mouths the words "I do!"
And I couldn't smile
Screwball gasps happily with a giant smile as he tackles into a hug, he picks her up and spins her around as she giggles
Helpless
Look into your eyes
And the sky's the limit
I'm helpless
Down for the count (hoo)
And I'm drownin' in 'em
Helpless (that girl is mine)
That girl is mine
Look into your eyes and the sky's the limit
I'm helpless (helpless)
Down for the count and I'm drownin' in em (yeah)
Screwball does a mini victory dance, he jumps in the air popping up into a black tuxedo with a red undershirt wearing a black bow tie, he licks his hand and slicks his spikey hair back
A hand gently placed itself on his cheek getting his attention, it was Amethyst standing in her wedding as the two stand at the alter on their wedding day
Screwy, I don't have a kingdom to my name
An acre of land, soldiers to command, a dollop of fame
All I have's my honor, a tolerance for pain
A couple of enchanted spells and my top-notch brain
Insane, your family brings out a different side of me
Your parents confides in me, Loontanic tried to take a bite of me
Screwball slowly turns his head angrily to look into the crowd but Amethyst turns his head making him look at her
No stress, my love for you is never in doubt
We'll find a place in this new world and we'll figure it out
I've been different from my family since I was a child
My mother's cold, my father died, I grew up buckwild
But I'll never forget my father's face, that was real
And long as I'm alive, Screwball, swear to God
You'll never feel so
Helpless (I do, I do, I do, I do)
Screwball
Helpless (I do, I do, I do, I do)
I've never felt so
Helpless (yeah, yeah)
Down for the count
And I'm drownin' in 'em (down for the count, I'm-)
Screwball bounces up and down happily as he grabs her holding her bridal style spinning her around as she nuzzled her cheek on his
Yo, my life is going fine 'cause Screwball's in it
I look into your eyes
And the sky's the limit, I'm
Helpless
Down for the count and I'm drownin' in 'em
Amethyst kisses him catching him off ground, he cups her lip kissing her back deeply
He sits in chair in a hospital twiddling his thumbs nervously, a nurse gets his attention gesturing him to come inside the room. Topaz and Sapphire look up at him with teary eyes stepping out of the way
There she was
His wife laying in the bed holding a pink bundled up blanket, she gently hands it to him he peels back the cloth lightly as meet with a tiny baby girl with curly blond hair
His daughter
Helpless
Screwball looks down at his daughter with teary eyes as he smiles with fatherly pride
.............................................
"Sounds to me you love your daughter very much." The doctor smiles softly
"Oh yeah I wont let anyone hurt my little girl." Screwball jabs a thumb to his chest with fatherly pride "I'd kill anyone who'd try." He smiles evilly clutching a burning fist
"Mister Screwtonagus perhaps you were territorial with your daughter
Screwball gaps dramatically babbling trying to find the words
"T-Th That is not true!"
.............................................
"Screwball get down here." Amethyst puts her hands on her hips annoyed at her husband who is upside down in the corner of the ceiling in form of a red black widow spider hissing at her
"I'll cOme DoWn there WhEN AlL those oUtLets have BaBy plugs On THEm!!" Screwball growls demonically narrowing his four spider eyes with a baby carrier on his chest as Emma giggles
.............................................
"Who's daddy little princess? Are you daddy's princess?" Screwball talks in baby talk ticking his daughter's stomach as she squeals
The door bells goes off, he carries his daughter towards it and opens the door, a mail carrier smiles holding a package "Package for Screwball."
"Oh yeah that's me!" Screwball smiles signing the form, mail carrier notices Emma sucking her thumb and admittedly gets big eyes "Aww this your daughter? She's so cute!" He stretches his hand out to pat her hand but winces in pain when Screwball quickly grabs his hand tightly making his hand turn blue
"You dare try to touch my off spring?!" Screwball growls like a pit bull
"B-But shes so cute I-I."
"You try touching my daughter again and I will beat you into the ground so hard you'll be haunted by flashbacks ever time you see a baby carriage!!!!!" Screwball growls staring down at the mail carrier with fire burning in his eyes
The mail carrier whimpers in fear of the angry father, Screwball twists his arm behind his back and kicks him in the butt before slamming the door
"Now what was I doing?" Screwball scratched his head confused "Oh yeah! Who's daddy little Princess!" Screwball raises Emma in front of him kissing her cheek walking away from the door
.............................................
Emma babbles chewing on a panda bear on mat in the park, a little toddler boy comes up to her and snatches the bear walking away with it
Emma starts to cry hysterically
Screwball runs up with a mace spiked ball above his head "Why you little!!-"
.............................................
Screwball sits in chair with his eyes crossed thinking "Mmmmmm ....... nope! Doesn't sound like me!" He puts his hands over his hand leaving back in the chair "But of course you should never expect nothing less from the handsome butt kicking pro like myself unlike you."
"We are getting off topic" Dr Chimazlie shakes his head "Let's discuss the elephant in the room?"
"Oh you mean Gordon? Yeah that guy's a real nut case, did ya know he's in here for breaking a guys spine with a peanut-"
"I meant why you are here?" Dr Chimazlie rubs his temple getting a migraine from Screwball's randomness "What are you here for?"
"I-I don't know."
"What do you mean you don't know?"
"I-I just don't know man .. I'm not supposed to be here."
"Mister Screwtonagus please I've heard that more time then I can count."
"When I'm the exception cause I'm not supposed to be here man honest!" Screwball narrows his eyes getting a little angry
"Well." Dr Chimazlie reads the file "It says here that you're under the suspension of causing massive harm."
"If ya wanna keep your lips attached to ya face I wouldn't read that file!!" Screwball growls , he falls to the ground groaning getting shocked
"The police reported they entered the house."
"Stop"
"Went upstairs."
"I said Stop!"
"And when they entered the room they found you in a destroyed infants room .... holding what was reported a shard of a gem
Screwball roars angrily quickly stands up tearing the collar off his neck throwing it to the ground, slamming his hands down on the desk tossing it to the side
He grabs the doctor by the throat and slams him up against the wall glaring his burning glowing red eyes "You've got a habit of picking people's brain it's time you know what it feels like!!!!" He smirks crazily pulls out a buzz saw and raises his hand above his head about to strike
Luckily guards come busting though the door and grab the saw out of his hand "Let me go! Let me at em! I just want five minutes alone with that quack!!!" Screwball groans as he's dragged out of the room.
"Are you alright doctor?" One of the guard asked as the monkey psychiatrist coughs from lack of air
"Yes I'm fine." He puts a hand up assuring him while looking at the door
.............................................
Guards hold Screwball tightly so he won't escape "Get in there ya psycho!" They throw him inside the cell quickly closing the door before Screwball bust though
"You wanna see psycho! I'll show ya psycho!!!!!" Screwball laughs manically slicing at the door with the buzz saw, he huffs out of energy realizing what he was doing. He quickly drops it backing away
"What is wrong with me?!" Screwball places back against the wall, he slowly slides down the wall. He hugs his knees running a hand though his hair tears rolling down his face
"Maybe they're right."
"Maybe I-I did do it."
"Maybe."
"Maybe I am a monster."