A/N: I have no idea how military bases and helicopter rentals work and stuff so to be honest with you, I'm not sure what I'm writing and it's probably not accurate. But for the sake of the story, let's all just pretend it makes sense 😃
Peyton's POV:
The clock struck 4 am. It was still dark out.
I came home last night, only to see Spencer already asleep on the couch. A book hugged tightly to his chest.
Romeo and Juliet.
I smiled to myself. He's read that like four times already.
"Spence?" I gently asked, shaking him a little. Instinctively, he stood up, rubbing his eyes to see me better.
"Hey. What took you so long?" He asked, his voice a little higher than usual.
"Just finishing up on paperwork." I mumbled and shrugged. Together, we walked over to his bedroom.
I pulled the blanket over to cover Spencer before climbing in myself, holding him one last time.
"I love you Spence." I could barely hear myself, let alone have Spencer hear me. Plus, he was already asleep, snoring lightly. I lightly traced over his eyes, and touched his lips, before kissing him softly. He really did deserve the world. I could only hope he would find someone better. Someone worthy of his love. I didn't sleep much, scared that if I closed my eyes this moment would slip through my fingers and I'd be this much closer to hurting the only people who loved me with everything they had.
The moon was still bright out, shining on me. Exposing my dirty deeds. I slumped around Spencer's apartment, to which I had grown accustomed to calling home. I never moved in, but I barely spent any time at my trash apartment. An apartment I had bought in a hurry. Now, I stood in another person's house. A freaking library. But I loved that about Spencer. He knew who he was and he was proud of that. It was a feeling I wasn't familiar with.
I double checked, making sure I didn't leave behind anything that could get me in trouble. My eyes caught sight of Spencer's dresser. I looked at myself through the mirror. Who are you?
My long, dirty blonde hair was tangled really badly. It was from all the pulling my hair during that voicemail I left for Emily a few hours earlier. I ran my hands across my eyes, taking notice of how my eye bags were so much more visible now. My irises were a boring plain shade of brown. Nothing special. They wouldn't intimidate anyone. The lips that once held laughter were now shut closed. Chapped and dry and pale. There was so much I wanted to tell Spence but no words could describe what I was feeling. There was nothing that could bring back the shine that Spence had in his eyes whenever he looked at me. He'll never see the confident, strong girl that walked into the BAU a few months ago. Infact, I don't see her either. I don't think I'll ever find her again.
The tears reappeared quickly as I sat back in my car. The only noises being the banging of my head against the steering wheel and my sobs. My breath hitching in my throat every so often. Taking the little courage I had, I started the car.
In silence, I drove to the military helicopter rentals. Taking in a deep breath before walking in.
"Name and badge ma'am." The lady spoke up monotonously.
Rummaging through my bag, I tried desperately to find my badge. My hands sweating and trembling with my every move. It's SSA Peyton Reid." I replied, handing my badge to her.
She eyed it suspiciously. "I understand that it says Peyton Rivera but, I, uh, go by Reid now." I laughed awkwardly. The lady seemed to accept that. I don't know why I said that but I liked the way it rolled off my tongue.
Closing my eyes, I swallowed down the tears before continuing, "I wanted to rent a helicopter. I have confirmation from above for a secret task." I shoved my hands aimlessly at my pants before realizing I didn't have any pockets. Relax Peyton, you got this.
Oh okay, for once my thoughts weren't so dark.
The lady called for someone in the back. "Ronaldo, I need you on that military helicopter!"
"Oh no, no I don't need a pilot." I interrupted her. Her eyes narrowed at me again. "I, um, already have training." I stated, hoping my voice didn't sound as anxious as I felt. The lady slowly nodded at me, but she looked unconvinced to say the least.
Waiting outside for the worker to bring me the helicopter, I dialed the only number on my phone that didn't have a contact assigned to it. My hands shaking as I brought my phone up to my ear.
"Thought you bailed Rivera." A deep voice on the other side chuckled. Oh I wish I could've. I fought the urge to roll my eyes at him.
"Shut up. I promised you I would do this for you and I did. I got the file, and I'm waiting to get on the plane."
"Good. Listen, there's been a change of plans."
I froze. What could've possibly changed now? We were so close to succeeding.
"Like what?" I asked, cautiously.
"I'm in Quantico for.. reasons." He trailed off, coughing slightly. "I'll be meeting you at the base. You trust me, right?"
My lips formed a straight line and I hesitated. Did I really trust him? I mean, sure, I knew him longer than I knew any of the BAU members but I'd choose them over Rio any day. I'd grown a special connection to them, something I never had with Rio. Too late to back out now. My mind warned me.
"Yes, of course. I'll meet you at the base."
"Good job, Rivera." He hung up. I could practically see him smirking through the phone. Rio was impulsive. And that was going to mess me up.
The rain had turned to harsh wind, and I shivered as I stood next to a helicopter waiting for Rio. The rain seemed to bring good things. I kissed Spencer in the rain, and it was raining that day he held me in his arms while I cried. And now the rain was gone, just like all the good things in my life.
Frustrated, I violently tried to push my hair back. Hearing footsteps coming closer to me, I whipped around. There that marvellous bastard stood, hands stuffed in his black suit.
"What were you doing in Quantico?" I asked but as usual Rio never answered properly.
"Come on, Peyton. Not even a hug? It's been forever, baby." For some reason, Rio calling me baby made me feel bitter. It sounded sweeter when Spence said it. I ignored his comment and got in the helicopter.
"Woah, hold on. Not so fast. Where's the file?" Rio impatiently tapped his foot, and I pushed him into the front seat. I wasn't in the mood to deal with his aggressiveness right now.
"Can you just get this thing out of here? I wanna go someplace far away." I huffed.
Rio, however, was expecting another answer. "Stop being moody, Peyton. Just give me the damn file!" He punched my seat, causing me to flinch.
His expressions softened. "Sorry, I'm sorry. I just really need that file." He grumbled.
"Glad to know you haven't changed." I mumbled back.
"Seriously? One person gave you attention for a few months and now you've forgotten who your real friends are?"
My eyes shot up at his statement.
"What? You think I wouldn't figure it out? I know all about your little rendezvous with that FBI Agent." His lips tugged upwards into a smirk and I wanted nothing more to punch him right there and then, but I controlled myself.
Rio was the only person who could get me out of this now.
I pulled out the file from my purse before waving it around, making sure it was just out of his reach.
"Nope, you're going to fly this helicopter out of here first." I smirked back.
He scowled, but complied. I laid back down, hoping to get Spencer and everyone else out of my head.
We were just about out of the city when I heard faint sounds of police sirens. I jerked back up and stood at the edge, trying to see down. Please don't let it be them. I silently pleaded. I could hear Rio cursing from the front but it was hard to hear anything through the loud noises of the helicopter. I looked over at him, and he was standing up from his seat.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck! What am I supposed to do now? Oh my god, you did this. This was your plan all along, wasn't it?" Rio yelled.
"What, no. Rio, I swear I wouldn't do that to you." I shrieked.
Looking directly at him now I realized how red rimmed his eyes were.
This motherfucker was high on something.
Rio grumbled and paced around before punching the seats again, making a mess of his knuckles. Acting almost as if the seats were a person. Maybe me.
I could hear the faint voices from below, and suddenly I knew. I could recognize that voice from anywhere.
"Peyton, please don't do this. Bring the plane back. We can work things out! I love you! I love you so much. Please don't do this. Please I'm begging you, I need you." Even after being so far away, I could still hear the desperation in his voice.
What did I do to get here? I'm not really sure, but a couple of months ago, I wouldn't have minded this. Now that Spencer had just confessed his undeniable love for me though, I wasn't so sure if I could do this. I had to, I knew that. I didn't have a choice, but the pain it would cause Spence.. He deserved the world. If anything, he was too good for me. He'll move on right? He had too. And then he could find someone else. Someone who'll make him happier than I ever did. This was for the best, I tried to convince myself.
Then, taking a few deep breaths, I looked back at Rio, who was staring right back. His eyes furious and deviant. Something had changed. I was scared of him.
I was scared of my best friend.
Too scared to say the words out loud, I slowly whispered. "I've ruined your perfect plan. You need to get rid of me." Rio always said that the threat needed to be eliminated. I just never imagined that I would be that threat. "You're going to push me off aren't you?"
He moved closer, stalking me as if he was a predator and I was his prey. I considered him my best friend once. That day seemed so far from now. I befriended a monster.
"You give me no choice, darling." He spat out, his words dripping venom.
I turned back around. The moon illuminating everything around me. I closed my eyes and thought about happy things. Spencer. No Peyton! He's one person you shouldn't be thinking about right now. It's over. You never could have had a future with him anyways.
And then, it came.
A hard shove from behind me. No sound left my mouth though. Cara's voice burned into the back of my mind. "You know it's a suicide mission, right?"
And for a second, I was flying. Soaring above the clouds like the angel Spence always said I was. But that's the thing. The higher you fly, the harder the fall is. Eventually, the fantasy ends, and there you are, right back to your nightmares. Right back to reality.
Because, when you fly, expect to fall.
My mind went blank and I waited for the pain to register as I hit the hard cement. I could hear the footsteps running towards me and out of the little conscience I had, I muttered, "I love you too Spence." Wanting nothing more than for him to hear me. Part of me knew this was coming. This time Spence couldn't catch me.
This time Spence couldn't save me.
A/N: no one:
peyton: i believe i can flyyyyyy i believe i can touch the skyyy
plot twist: she didn't fly and she didn't touch the sky 🧍♀️⚰️