Death's Gift - Chapter Thirty-Three
Realized Feelings
By the time Hermione had actually managed to drag Harry out of bed it was well past lunch and almost dinner time. Currently their group sat in the library, studying. Harry's eyes roamed the room, he had already finished his work, it was easy when you already knew everything. Eventually his eyes fell on the doorway as he watched people come in and out. Suddenly, he shot up from his chair and ducked into the nearest row of bookshelves.
"Harry?" Draco asked, he'd been sitting right next to the boy, but Harry was to far away to hear his hushed voice.
"He probably went to find a different book." Hannah offered.
"But why did he shoot up like that?" Susan asked.
"Who knows." Blaise said, "Harry just does weird things sometimes."
Hermione snorted, remembering their earlier conversation, "Actually, I don't think it had anything to do with a book."
Everyone at the table turned to look at her.
"What do you mean?" Neville asked.
Hermione shrugged, "I think Harry just got a bit nervous."
Luna leaned over towards Hermione, "Did he tell you?" She asked so quietly that Hermione could barely hear her.
The girl nodded.
"What are you guys talking about?" Theo asked, "It's as if there's some secret Ravenclaw language or something."
"More like girl language." Anthony told him, "I've got no clue what they're on about."
Hermione looked towards where Harry's gaze had been, but no one was there.
"Harry had some good luck with a friend." Luna told them.
Everyone shared a look.
"Harry got himself a girlfriend and he's avoiding her?!" Draco exclaimed in a whisper.
"Smooth, real smooth." Blaise teased.
"Harry doesn't have a girlfriend." Hermione told them, "Even if he did, what are the odds of it being someone not at this table? We're basically the only people who he'll give his time of day."
"That one Hufflepuff girl, Flora, asked him out." Anthony said.
"Yeah, but I don't think Harry realized it was supposed to be a date." Theo told him.
Draco, Blaise, and Hermione all nodded.
"Let's just hope that whatever Harry's doing that it doesn't last too long." Luna said, they all agreed.
. . . . . . .
Harry sighed in relief the moment he saw Tom leave the library. He didn't know why the man had come in the first place, but he'd watched as he eyed the table where his friends sat suspiciously before exchanging a word with Madam Pince, leaving after. After what happened the last day Harry wasn't sure if he could be around the man anymore. Subconsciously, his hand moved up to touch his lips, almost as if he could still feel the kiss. He regretted not storming into that office and yelling at Tom for doing it without his permission. At least things would've been cleared up to some point. Now it was just going to be extremely awkward whenever he saw him. Harry walked through the shelves, looking for a book so he'd have an excuse when he went back. Though he found it hard to concentrate on titles. He slowed to a stop as he remembered what had happened. How Tom had been jealous of Luna, how he'd been pinned to the door, the man's iron like grip on his wrist, the feel of his lips on his... Harry shook his head. It was just a kiss, he'd kissed Ginny tons of times before, though, none of them ever felt like that. Ginny's kisses made his stomach wrench and made him want to throw up. Tom's kiss was... different. There was something about it that made Harry's legs want to give out, something about it that made his head fuzzy, something that made him want more...
Harry shook his head. He couldn't be thinking of Tom like that. Heck, it was wrong for him to think of him as a friend. Friends...
Tom came closer and grabbed Harry's chin, pulling him up to meet his own, "Join me."
Harry's eyes widened as he started into the crimson red ones on the dark lord. With him being close enough now Harry could make out his face. He had a pale, creamy complexion, neat, black hair, a very pointed nose that curved up at the end, a sharp jawline as well as cheekbones, and fairly plum, peachy pink lips. Harry was still processing the question through his completely fogged up brain, the only thing he could really process was how handsome Tom was up close.
...
"Just do it Harry."
Harry's eyes widened, "You called me Harry..."
Voldemort nodded, "I did. You call me Tom."
Harry's blinked, the corners of his mouth twitching up to a small smile, "How do I do it then, Tom?"
...
Harry shook his head, fully turning around, "Nope. Luna and Xeno are really good at covering for you and not asking questions. Though, speaking of this morning, since when is Quirell retiring?"
"While he is a adequate Defense Against the Dark Arts Teacher, you will be having a better one this year."
Harry raised an eyebrow. Tom smirked and help up a paper in his left hand, "I figured it would be better to be in Hogwarts myself."
Harry gapped, "You're going to be the new Defense Against the Dark Arts Teacher?!"
...
The Death Eaters nodded and gathered into their groups, Tom gave the signal for them to aperate out and they did so, Tom then turned to Harry.
"Will you be able to apperate there? I know you haven't done it since you came back to life."
"I think so." Harry said, to be honest he didn't think he'd be able to make it there without splinting himself.
Tom sighed and stuck his hand out, "This is a one time thing." he told him.
Harry awkwardly grabbed Tom's wrist and the man pulled them both along to private drive, Harry letting go as soon as they landed.
...
Over the sound of Vernon's screams and the commotion outside, Harry didn't notice that Tom had walked in until he had leaned down a little to be speaking directly into Harry's ear.
"As much as I enjoy the show the Aurors will be arriving soon."
A shiver went down Harry's spine as he realized that Tom had been watching the entire time, as well as the fact that he could feel the man's warm breath against his neck.
"Whatever, the Death Eaters can hold the off for a few minuets." Harry replied, pulling away slightly.
Tom smirked a little and stepped back, Harry returning his attention to his relatives.
...
"That was new."
Harry raised an eyebrow, "What was new?"
"I'll explain later, right now we have to leave before we are seen."
Harry nodded and grabbed Tom's wrist, being pulled along in side apperation to Riddle manor once again.
"I have never seen that side of you before, it was... different."
Harry was confused, "What do you mean by 'that side of me'?"
Tom chuckled, "You are a mystery."
"Tom, I don't know what that means."
The dark lord hummed in response, but said nothing else on the subject, much to Harry's annoyance.
...
'Happy Birthday.'
Harry couldn't form a reply, and at the same time he knew that it would be pointless to give one even if he wanted to. Instead Harry decided to simply get ready for bed, though before he drifted off to sleep he felt the need to say somethin in return.
'Thanks...'
...
Harry's brows furrowed in confusion, "I don't get it. If you weren't angry with me... then why did you shut me out?"
Tom chuckled slightly, "You speak as if you missed me."
Harry bit his lip, "Well, I did."
...
"Harry..."
The boy jolted when he felt Tom grab his wrists, not even having noticed that the man had walked around his desk, their faces now only inches apart.
"You, you are insufferable." Tom told him in a low voice.
Harry had opened his mouth to reply, but Tom cut him off.
"But you are the only thing keeping me from spiraling into insanity."
...
Tom sighed, "Remember when you asked me if I had a favorite Death Eater?"
Harry's brows furrowed in confusion, "Yeah? But I do see how that's relevant."
Tom rolled his eyes, "I said no, because you are my favorite."
Harry blinked, he was Tom's favorite? Why, Why would he be Tom's favorite?
...
"Friend?" Tom asked.
Harry's eyes widened as he realized what he'd said, "Er- I mean- Whatever you call this kind of relationship that there is between us- If there even is one I mean-..."
Tom fell silent, his gaze fell down tp the floor.
"Tom?" Harry asked, noticing the change in the man's behavior.
"I've never had any friends..." Tom said in a quite voice.
Harry felt a slight pain inside for Tom, everyone needed friends, "Well..." he began, "We could be friends?"
Tom looked up, his eyes coming level to Harry's, "I would like that."
Harry smiled, Tom returning it.
...
"Harry, are you going to Hogsmead this weekend?" Draco asked.
"Why?"
"Because, I know a girl who fancies you," The blonde told him, "She was hoping you two could meet up at the three broomsticks or something."
"Unfortunately, Mr. Potter-Black has a detention that day." A voice from behind them spoke.
Harry and Draco turned around to see Tom, or "Professor Vandistine" standing there.
"I do?" Harry asked.
Tom shot him a look, "Yes."
Draco shrugged, "I guess I can tell her. I have to turn down girls all the time anyway. You'd just be too awkward to do it."
Harry rolled his eyes, "Please, I think I could turn someone down if I wanted to."
Draco raised an eyebrow, "Oh yeah? Then why don't you tell Millicent you can't meet up with her?"
Harry's breath caught in his throat, "Millicent?!" He asked.
Draco nodded.
"Why would she like me?! I don't even talk to her!"
"Perhaps that is exactly the reason." Tom said, "She is yet to know what a pain speaking with you really is."
Harry rolled his eyes, "Shove off."
Tom smirked.
Draco looked between the two of them, "You two have a weird relationship."
"One that Miss Bulstrode should do well to avoid." Tom said before walking off, leaving behind a confused Harry and Draco.
...
"Harry~" Hermione dragged out the name, "Where have you been?"
"Sorry, I was reading with Luna." Harry said, sitting down on the bench with her.
"Seriously Harry, it's as if she's your best friend now." The girl complained.
Harry narrowed his eyes, a slight smirk forming onto his lips, "Are you jealous?"
Hermione crossed her arms, "I have no reason to be jealous of her."
Harry bumped Hermione's shoulder with his own, "C'mon Hermione, you know you'll always be my best friend. Besides, I haven't mentioned anything about your constant hanging out with Anthony."
Hermione's cheeks turned a light pink, "Don't try to change the subject!"
Harry laughed, "It's alright, you can tell me anything 'Mione, besides, It's glaringly obvious that you like him."
"And it's glaringly obvious that you like Luna." Hermione shot back."
"I don't like Luna." Harry told her, "Why does everyone always think I like Luna?"
"Maybe because you two are practically joined at the hip and spend time secluded in the library sharing a blanket while reading." A voice said.
"How'd you know about that?" Harry asked.
Tome raised an eyebrow, "I am not blind you know."
Harry rolled his eyes, "Are you stalking me?"
"I have no idea what you mean." Tom said before walking away.
Harry sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"I'm telling you!" Hermione whispered, "There's something off about him!"
"I think you're imagining things Hermione." Harry said.
...
"Harrison?"
Harry and Anthony turned around to see a Hufflepuff standing there, Harry recognized her as Flora Doridia, a year above him, her cheeks a bright red.
"Yes?" Harry asked.
"I- I um..." The girl took a breath, "I was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime this weekend... just the two of us..."
"Sorry, but Harrison already has prior commitments this weekend the he must attend to." Tom appeared out of nowhere.
"Oh- okay. Well, maybe some other time?"
"Sure." Harry answered awkwardly.
The Flora smiled and ran away towards a group of girls who appeared to be her friends. Tom on the other hand simply raised his head and walked away, not even glancing in Harry's direction.
"What do you have to do this weekend?" Anthony asked.
Harry shrugged.
...
"She didn't kiss me." Harry told him once he'd regained his composure, "She whispered something into my ear."
Tom fell silent, it was only then that Harry realized their position. His eyes widened as he realized that Tom practically had him pinned to the door, he could feel the man's breath against his face, their noses were almost touching. He swallowed thickly, looking into Tom's eyes. They weren't the blue that they appeared to be with his glamour, they were a crimson red, the eyes that so often filled his subconscious, that haunted his dreams.
"You have no idea how much joy it will bring me to see you in my arms"
Harry's breath hitched when he remembered the dream he'd dreamt before all of this happened, the one that he'd been unable to remember. He felt the blood rush to his cheeks.
"And even if she did..." He began carefully, "Why would you care?"
Harry watched as crimson eyes looked him up and down. He noticed that along with his eyes, Tom's false appearance had completely faded away. The brown hair was now back to it's normal black, his skin a creamy pale, and his jawline much sharper. He froze as he met Tom's eyes again, seeing something else within them, something he'd seen a lot, something he could never really place, something he now recognized.
Want.
"Why would I care?" Tom breathed.
Harry froze when he heard Tom's voice. Just that as well as the look in his eyes was enough to send chills down his spin. He forced himself to nod, not trusting his own voice. Tom's hand that was still on his wrist tightened it's grip slightly. Harry briefly glanced over at where it was pressed against the door, though his eyes snapped back to Tom in less than a second.
"Because you're mine."
Before Harry could realize it Tom had closed the short distance between them in one fluid movement. He felt the man's lips on his in a a slow, unmoving kiss.
...
Harry mentally cursed himself as he felt his heart skip a beat. He shrunk down, back against the bookshelf. Why was he feeling this way all of a sudden? Had he always felt this way? Sure, he thought about Tom a lot, and he enjoyed spending time with him, but that was where it stopped. Right? Well, it definitely wasn't. Why would he have had those dreams if he didn't feel something towards the man? Why did he enjoy the kiss so much if their relationship was completely platonic? And why in Merlin's name did he want to do it again?! This wasn't good, he was going to go insane if he kept thinking like this. How could he possibly fancy Lord Voldemort?!
Harry sighed and ran his hands through his hair. Because Tom wasn't "Lord Voldemort". Voldemort was the insane man from his first life, Tom was different. Tom was Tom. Sure, he had his downfalls, but there were also so many great things about him too. Harry clenched his fists in annoyance. How could he have let Tom have this big of an impact on him?! Clenching his jaw Harry made a decision. He stood up and walked briskly back over towards the table. He closed his open books and started to put his things in his bag.
"Are you leaving?" Draco asked.
"Yeah, sorry but I just remembered that I had a detention that I'm almost late for." Harry lied easily.
Hermione gave him a certain look but he shot her down.
"See you guys back at the dorm." He told Blaise and Draco before taking off.
He speed walked through the halls, avoiding his fellow students and heading in a direction that he'd gone a million times before. When he reached the door he didn't even bother knocking as he thrust it open, throwing his bag down angrily. He slammed the door behind his and threw up a silencing charm. Tom looked up from the papers on his desk, his eyes widening.
"How dare you." Harry hissed.
Tom didn't reply, but he did stiffen up.
"First, you change my view on the Wizarding world, then you make me care about you as if you were my friend, and now you try to take advantage of me!" Harry was shouting by the end of it.
"I was not trying to take advantage of you." Tom told him, trying to keep his voice as calm as possible.
"Oh yeah? Then what do you call that little stunt you did last night?!"
Tom fell silent, "I... I do not know..."
Harry scoffed, "Bullocks. You tell me all these things this year, how I'm your favorite, how you distanced yourself so that you didn't get possessive over me, how I'm your tie to sanity or whatever. Then you go and get jealous of my friendship with Luna and try to shoot down everyone that tries to get a shot with me."
Tom didn't reply.
"Say something." Harry told him, angry at the man's silence, "I don't care what it is. Just bloody say something instead of sitting there like a coward!"
"I am not a coward." Tom hissed.
"You act like it!" Harry told him, "You're always running away when something didn't go exactly as planned, or is that not what happened over summer?!"
"That was different!" Tom defended.
"I fail to see how."
"Do you think it is easy? Putting up with your constant remarks and battling nature?"
"Well it's not like dealing with you has been a walk in the park either." Harry spat.
Tom sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Look, I understand that you are upset with me. I was not in my right mind when I did what I did."
"Not in your right mind?" Harry asked, "Tell me how you're not in your right mind when you bloody kiss someone!"
"I didn't plan to!" Tom shouted, "I didn't plan any of this!"
"Enough with your plans! Don't you know by now that life never goes by plan?!" Harry asked, "I mean, look at us. According to a prophecy one of us is supposed to kill the other, yet here we are being friends."
"That's... that's not what I am talking about."
Harry looked at Tom incredulously, "Then what plan are you talking about?"
Tom sighed and stood up, within a second he was standing in front of Harry.
"This." He breathed, "These things I feel for you, it was never part of any plan of mine."
Harry blinked. For a moment he was dumbfounded until something in his brain clicked and he started to process what Tom had said.
"Tom..." Harry said softly.
"I am sorry."
Harry's eyes widened.
"For everything. My past actions, for what happened last night."
Harry bit his lip. He sighed.
"You don't have to be sorry..." He began. He looked up at Tom, deciding he liked his crimson eyes better than the brown ones they were currently. He stepped closer to Tom and closed the small distance between them.
"I liked it." He said once he pulled away.
Not even a second later Tom's hands flew to the sides of Harry's face and the man pulled him close again, pressing their lips together in a fierce kiss. Harry let out a noise of surprise before he melted into the kiss, returning it. He slowly brought his hands up and wrapped them around Tom's shoulders, pulling slightly at the ends of his hair. The feeling of Tom's lips against his was intoxicating, and in just this short time Harry was quickly getting addicted. Slowly, the two pulled away and looked each other in the eyes.
"Er- What now?" Harry asked.