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Charlie slowly turned the ignition off, her leg drumming against her keys. Her eyes drifted up to the house, spotting the light glowing from his room. She felt a deep breath fill her chest as she began to open up her car door, but stopped when an overwhelming sense of fear creeped up her back.
How do you tell someone, who you know and trust, information you don't trust anyone with?
Charlie knew she was doing the right thing. That to move on from her past, she had to overcome how it affected her present. But, the idea that telling Jacob, who was so successful, kind, and selfless, who had become her present, might scare him away?
It was heart wrenching.
She quickly ran up the front steps, and with a split second of hesitation, rang the doorbell. As she rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet, she heard a faint, "I'm coming!"
Charles watched through the small window as Jacob came stumbling down his hallway, and before she can really even register it, the door flew open to reveal to Charlie her incredibly beautiful boyfriend.
She was face to face with a smiling Jacob, who's damp red hair has stuck to places on his forehead. He was wearing a pair of faded Iron Man sweatpants, and no shirt, beads of water still tricking down his chest. He's just there, in all of his glistening, Jacob Bertrand fucking glory.
Charlie's mouth feels as if it is full of sand. Truly, every time she sees him, it's her first time meeting him again. She tenses up, and that moment of shock always paralyzes her for the faintest second. A shiver runs through her body as he leant in and pressed a chaste kiss to her lips.
"Jesus, you look fucking beautiful as always," he murmured as he pulled away, his eyes not so subtly tracing down her body. Charlie gave a nervous laugh, wrapping her arms around his neck as he squeezed her waist.
She still feels all of the nerves built up in her chest, but when she hugs him, it's like all of that melts away. Charlie had never experienced this type of care or love from anyone other than her family — no one had ever asked about her day, or held open doors, or kissed her on the forehead.
All of a sudden, Charlie let out a yelp as she was hoisted over one of his shoulders, Jacob laughing as he carried her back inside the house.
"Okay, So I picked up the food before I showered, so it may be a bit cold," Jacob babbled as Charlie drummed on his chest, "But Inception is ready to go, and so is the waffle maker. It makes Millennium Falcon waffles, by the way."
Charlie tried to giggle, but couldn't as she was in the most precarious position imaginable. "I would one hundred percent be laughing right now if my chest wasn't being pushed against your weirdly point shoulder."
Jacob quickly wrapped his hands around her waist, sliding her back down to solid ground, his face twisted into a glare.
"Don't talk about my shoulder that way. Otherwise, you can figure out the waffle maker by yourself."
Charlie watched as his nose twitched just a fraction of a centimeter, signaling that he was being a little shit in some shape or form.
"You don't know how to use the waffle maker, do you," Charlie lilted as Jacob refused to meet her eyes. She placed both of her hands on his cheeks, forcing him to look at her.
"No comment at this time." Jacob mumbled as he turned and walked into the kitchen, where he had clearly spend a good amount of time setting up both their dinner and their dessert. Charlie's heart melted as Jacob gestured to the set up, mouthing a silent 'Ta-Da!"
"Did you know, you're the biggest fucking softie?" Charlie murmured as she wrapped her arms around his back. "Like, I knew you were sweet, but I have you in the palm of my hand, Bertrand."
Jacob groaned. "Stop letting the people know, Pierce! It's only for you," he said as he twisted her around and pecked her forehead. Charlie pulled him into the kitchen, quickly opening the boxes of takeout while Jacob put The Ride by Catfish and the Bottlemen on shuffle.
There they began to eat, while simultaneously mixing batter and cracking eggs. Charlie would take a piece of Samosa and place it into Jacob's mouth as he stirred the batter, drawing shapes and pictures with the leftover flour on his chest.
Jacob couldn't help but stare at his girlfriend as she did her weird dancing wiggle. He had spent so much time, more than he would care to admit thinking about the moments like these, the ones that you share with that person that becomes its own secret; Jacob spent shameless nights imagining them dancing in his living room again, mimicking the night that they had kissed for the first time.
He had never been one for love, or like, or anything to do with feeling more than the normal amount — he had always been content with the idea that maybe that person that's supposed to fill your glass for a while didn't exist for him. But then Charlie came into his life, full of stories and love and light. For someone who worked in film, he had seen those picture perfect scenarios play out time and time again. It's not what he was looking for, but somehow, somehow, it was what he found.
By the time their baking finished and the album played through, they were stuffed with food, covered in flour, and extremely proud of their ten waffles. They had both settled on the couch, both glued to the film that they both loved so much.
Charlie had been waiting for the right moment to share with him the most vulnerable part of her; all she needed was 20 seconds, 20 seconds of courage to tell the boy that she was sure she loved just one more thing about her.
"I was an addict." She blurted as Joseph Gordon Levitt fell from a ceiling. Jacob swift turned his head towards her, not fully registering what she said.
"Bug, what?" His voice was soft as he muted the film.
Charlie gulped, but continued with her word vomit, not stopping to look at his face or stature or even guess what he may be thinking.
"I grew up in Riverside. I honestly, truly do not have much to complain about. My parents divorced at a young age, but it was the right decision. Sure, it became a source of tension when I turned older, but I had never had trouble keeping the balance, until one day, my Dad up and left. Didn't leave a note, telling Leo or I where he had gone, but we had guessed he was no longer in California. It became a huge damper on our family dynamic — my Mom began to drink to drown out the pain of raising two kids, while Leo was trying his best to not let the trauma of losing a father affect his budding career. I handled it well, I just resorted to books, poetry, and movies to get me through. Until, uh, Leo left."
It was at this point that Jacob scooted as close as possible to his girlfriend, grabbing her hands and interlacing her fingers with his. Charlie gave him a watery smile, and continued.
"He had to go, he had to. I don't blame him for leaving, because he was doing it for him. I still had Fallon, who was going to school, so I think in my 16-year-old head, I believed I could handle being the daughter of an uncontrollable alcoholic. Turns out, well, that didn't work out too well for me. Not too long after Leo left did Fallon start getting more roles, and eventually stopped attending school, leaving me, pretty much alone. At school I had no one, at home I had an abusive mother. For the first time, I had to come to terms with my own thoughts, and it was that day, that I found a half-empty bottle of Xanax in the medicine cabinet, and popped two."
"It became routine for me. Wake up, pop two. That's how the sad thoughts went away. At lunch, pop two more. Got rid of the all-consuming anger. And at night, three for good measure, to leave me in a haze so blurry I didn't have to think at all. No one really recognized my problem. Leo and Fallon were working their asses off, and my Mom was too drunk. It was only when Leo came by to tell me he and Fallon were able to find an apartment that he found me passed out on the bathroom floor, not breathing."
"Now," Charlie took in a shuddering breath, not able to meet Jacob's eyes. "I know, I know this is a lot. I know it's not what you want in a person, and I know that this, who I was, who I am because of it, may scare you away. But I have to be real when I say, since I've met you, it feels like a fucking distant memory. Because feeling real joy, real happiness with someone I care about so, so fucking much, is better than any high."
Silence filled the room as Charlie's words ended with a croak, her voice hoarse from telling her story. She started at her hands, as the way her pinky tilted to the right, at the patterns on her fingertips, anything other than him.
"Charlotte Pierce. Please look at me." Jacob's voice cut lowly across the silence. She did not move; she did not want to watch everything that she loved crumble.
It was when he placed a timid finger under her chin that her eyes met his, and she was swimming in a sea of red and blue and the translucent color of tears. Her eyes focused back in to see that her love, had tear tracks running down his face.
"Charlotte Pierce, you are the single strongest person I have ever met. I'm not fucking with you to make you feel better, I promise you. Your ability to come out of a struggle like that and still see the good in the world, see the good in everything, makes you the type of person that is why I believe in people. Bug, nothing, especially this, could ever stop me from loving you. Never. Because when I tell you I love every single fucking bit of you, I mean it. I mean it, Charlie. You are everything to me. You mean everything to me and I'm going to hold on to you and love you for as long as you'll let me."
It was like a burst of warmth filled her chest at his words. All she could do was stare into his eyes, and vice versa, and even through the tears and running makeup, Jacob and Charlie saw the same look in one another's expression.
Pure, unfiltered love.
Jacob's eyes widened as he realized that he had told her he loved her. Charlie watched as his lips tipped up into a small smile, and a grin spread across her face as Jacob tackled her into the most powerful kiss she had ever experienced.
Their lips connect over and over again, and both of them can feel the wetness of tears still on their cheeks. All Charlie could think of was that Jacob was the drug that could never hurt her, that he could only bring her happiness. All Jacob could think of was how innately strong and beautiful the woman in his arms was.
Charlie broke them apart, the both of them breathless, chests heaving. Jacob's hands still trailed over her stomach, his fingers making her feel butterflies.
"I love you too, by the way."
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DRAMA AND LOVE AS FUCK😫
i really hope you enjoyed the soft part of this chapter, but i also hope you got something out of reading charlie's story.
addiction is something so personal to me, and the message i want to put across is that no matter who you are or what you've gone through, you are deserving of the utmost amount of love <3
coming up soon.... more drama? more soft shit? the world may never know
as always, i love u guys,,, so so much <33
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