"Come on Kendra, you can't stay in bed another day. I won't let you!" Avianna argues with me as she trying to pull me up.
"I really don't want to do anything, please."
"No you said you were going, and you're going. Come on, up up up." She says clapping.
It's Saturday and Nyla's sister wedding day. This whole past week I've been in my room. I haven't left even for breakfast. I don't want to see anyone. My dad was in Canada until Wednesday, when I finally spoke to him on the phone. He came to look for me at least twice a day but I didn't want to see him. So when I finally answered his phone call and asked him for time, he was able to return home. Miss Sidney was out of campus this week and didn't bother me to either. And Shawn, well he is mainly the reason why I haven't left my room. I really don't want to see him and i know he is here. I feel bad for the way I reacted last time we kissed, but it was true. At the moment I couldn't think of anything else but my whole mum situation. Nyla let us know yesterday before going home that she got Shawn a small gig at her sister's wedding since I had mentioned shawn sings, Nyla mentioned it to her family and they wanted to give him a chance to put himself out there.
"Kendra, honey." Avianna says sounding like a parent. "I know you are going through some shit right now, but you can't just hide Kendra, you can't run forever. You did it in London and you're doing it here, what's next? You moving to South America until the next inconvenience happens and you run again?" She asks and I lower my head. She is right. I don't know how to face my problems, I run from them.
"I am not telling you what to do or how to fix your problems, but until you don't face them, they won't be fixed." She says giving my hand a small squish before standing up and going to the bathroom.
I contemplate her words and she is completely right. I can't keep running away from everything that happens to me. I can't keep hiding from the situations I have to face, just hoping they'll disappear. I shouldn't have to hide from miss Sydney nor Shawn, and I won't.
"Avianna," I say pounding on the bathroom door. "Hurry up, I gotta get ready for the wedding too."
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Shawn's POV:
"I'm so nervous bro I think I'm going to shit my pants."
"Okay I did not need to know that." Brian says back with a disgusted face.
"I'm kidding obviously." I laugh.
Brian and I had been here for a while but in the back of the venue. I hadn't performed at a party before, well aside from my family's events of course, so my nerves are through the roof. I practice with the guitar in the back for a little before they come to get me. I will be doing covers of famous artist like Ed Sheeran and Bruno Mars who are Nathaly's, Nyla's sister, favorite artists. I was surprised when Nyla reached out to have me perform. I am a nobody, why would they want me? She let me know Kendra had mentioned I have a beautiful singing voice and this would be her sister's wedding gift from her. She wanted to pay me but I refused, the fact that she's letting me do this for her means more to me than any money. She did mention that if her parents like what I do, they would be giving me a small donation. Nyla is a literal angel.
"Okay it's time Shawn are you ready?" She asks.
"Yeah, yeah." I say shaking my whole body as if it would get rid of the nervous feeling I have right now.
"Okay I will go announce you and when you hear your name you go out through here." She says pointing to a side exit leading to the small stage at the end of the venue and I nod. "Oh by the way," she says before leaving. "She's here."
I smile because I know exactly who she's talking about. I didn't think she would be here. Last thing Brian said was that Avianna couldn't convince her to come and now she's here. Well if I was nervous before, now I'm even more, but it gives me an idea.
"... Shawn Mendes." I hear Nyla say and that my cue.
"Kill it man." Brian cheers for me.
I step on to the stage and wave at the people. I look at every single table but I don't see her. I then spot Avianna, and an empty chair next to her.
"Hi I'm Shawn Mendes, and I'm going to be performing a few songs for you all tonight . Nathaly and Benny, I hope you guys nothing but happiness on your marriage and I hope you enjoy." I say and as I remove my eyes from the newly weds, I spot my pretty girl walking in. I have seen Kendra a handful amount of times now, but I don't know how she manages to leave me speechless every time. The beautiful red silky dress she's wearing fits on her body amazing , her hair parted in the middle perfectly slicked back into a low ponytail revealing her full beautiful face, I'm not lying when I say I even see her walk in in slow motion. She catches me looking at her and smiles at me.
I'm brought to earth when I remember where I am and what I have to do, so without any second to waste, I start playing the strings to Just The Way You Are by Bruno Mars.
A few songs later, my time to perform was coming to an end. I had enjoyed seeing people enjoy the music, dance and even sing along with me, Kendra included, but it was time I did something I should've done some time before.
"Thank you so much for having me tonight. I have time for one more song, and I wanted to do an original song. This song I wrote it for someone who I never seem to find the perfect words to speak to, but I hope I found the correct words to sing." I say and look at her. Her face is in shock because I'm sure she knows I'm talking about her and when she sees me look her way she smiles at me again. I start to play the guitar strings before I start melting on my chair.
"Maybe I had too many drinks
But that's just what I needed
I hope that you don't think that what I'm saying sounds conceited
When I look across the room, and you're staring right back at me
Like somebody told a joke and we're the only ones laughing."
I sing and look at her. She has a big smile on her face and is staring at me with a beautiful shine in her eyes.
"Baby, tell me when you're ready
I'm waitin'
Baby, any time you're ready
I'm waitin'
Even ten years from now
If you haven't found somebody
I promise, I'll be around
Tell me when you're ready
I'm waitin"
As the song continues I get more and more into it. I have her here, this is my chance of expressing how I feel again, this time sober. I can't miss this opportunity, I don't even want to close my eyes to not lose the chance of seeing her smile. I forget we are in a room full of people and focus only on her, my pretty girl.
By the end of the song, everyone is clapping. I'm immediately brought back to earth from my day dream of Kendra running up to me to kiss me. I thank them for everything and I see Kendra stand up and walk towards the exit of the venue. I stand up to go after her but Nathaly and Benny approach me and I can't go anymore. They ask me if I can sing Perfect by Ed Sheeran for their first dance since they liked the way I performed his songs. I agree and sit back down, internally wishing Kendra was here so she could hear this song.
Once the song was over and I thanked everyone again, I go to the back of the venue where Brian was waiting for me.
"Wow bro just wow. You killed it out there." He says and hugs me.
"Thanks man." I say hugging him back.
"And that original song, man that's is a beautiful song I hadn't heard it before."
"Yeah I just wrote it not long ago."
"Let me guess, for Kendra?" He asks and I give him a if-you-already-know-why-you-asking look. "Did she like it?"
"I don't know man, I think I fucked up again."
"Again Shawn?"
"Yes again! Right after the song she got up and left."
"Oh man." He says right before Nyla walks in with a big smile.
"Shawn, oh my god, that was amazing. Kendra was not lying when she said you were good."
"Thank you." I say
"Here," she says handing me an envelop. "You don't want to charge me but I ask you to accept this small donation my parents want to give you."
I open the envelope and see a big amount and my eyes go wide.
"No Nyla i can't accept this, this isn't a small donation, this is a whole pay."
"They were very satisfied with everything Shawn they loved it. And so did my sister and Benny, I mean they asked you to even sing for their first dance like come on, you deserve it take it." She insists.
"I'll accept it just because I need it, thank you." I say shyly.
"You're welcome and you guys are more than welcome to stay for the party." She says before turning around to leave.
"Wait Nyla wait," I say making her stop. "Where's Kendra?"
She sighs. "She went back to the academy."
"What why?" I ask. Why would she leave? She seemed to be having fun. Did the song bothered her. Ugh I shouldn't have done that. "Did I make her uncomfortable?"
"No Shawn it wasn't you. She is just going through some difficult stuff right now."
"What difficult stuff?" I ask.
"It's not my position to tell you, but believe me, just give her some time." She says and leaves to the party.
Give her some time. Yeah that's what I should do. I can't be so selfish and only think of me when she's suffering. I will give her all the time she needs and when she's ready, just as my song said, I will be here waiting for her.