"you did what?!", taehyung asks shocked and angrily. jeongguk went to a party with his friends the day before. he just told taehyung what he did there and taehyung doesn't like it at all.
"i just wanted to try it once okay?"
"jeongguk you did drugs! don't act like it's not a big deal! i can't believe that you've done this.", he says after finding out jeongguk did coke.
jeongguk found new friends he spends a lot of time with and taehyung hates it. not to mention that he's totally neglecting taehyung without even realizing, but the fact that his new friends are a bad influence makes it so much worse.
"tae please, don't make a big deal out of it."
he just looks at him with a dropped jaw.
"i can't fucking believe this. i didn't say anything when you started drinking, but coke? jeongguk you never were the kind of person to do stuff like that."
"tae baby-"
"i'm so disappointed. how would you react if i did that?"
when jeongguk thinks about it he has to admit for himself that he'd totally freak out.
jeongguk who's sitting on the edge of the bed pulls taehyung close by his wrist.
"i won't do it again, okay? you don't have to worry."
"i hope so.", he just mumbles madly.
"let's relax now okay? we didn't spend the night together in a long time."
no wonder when you're always with your new friends.
but no matter what, taehyung can't resist the feeling of being close to his lover, letting himself down on his lap now and kissing his lips.
~
"taeeeeee.", jeongguk calls him at three am, waking the other up who had just fallen asleep half an hour ago.
"jeongguk?"
"can i pleaseee come over, my parents will unalive me.", he laughs. taehyung immediately hears he's drunk.
taehyung sighs.
"yeah. do you want me to pick you up?"
"noo, i'm like 5 minutes away, stay in bed. i'm a big boy.", his drunk jabbering makes taehyung sad. not that the thinks it's a bad thing to drink sometimes, but not THIS often.
"sure."
jeongguk actually arrives 5 minutes later, texting taehyung to open the door with plenty of typing mistakes.
"tae. i missed you.", jeongguk let's himself fall on taehyung while they're still standing, hiding his face in taehyung's chest.
"jeongguk you need to be quiet or my parents will wake up. you don't want them to see you drunk, do you?"
he shakes his had. "but did you miss me too?"
"jeongguk shh, please just come upstairs."
"so you didn't miss me?", he asks. he's so damn drunk.
"i missed you gguk, please come on now."
jeongguk lifts his head and starts walking, but not without taehyung's support, holding the other by his arm so he doesn't fall.
they arrive at taehyung's room. he immediately closes the door, watching jeongguk quickly go to taehyung's bed, sitting down, his head hanging low.
taehyung sits down next to him, with a sigh.
"my head is spinning."
taehyung grabs his hand, gently doing that stroky thing with his dumb. no matter how mad he sometimes get, right now, when he sees jeongguk in this state and sees that he's not feeling well, he wants to be there for him.
jeongguk places his head on taehyung's shoulder.
"is this really what makes you happy ggukie?"
"what? you? yeah you make me happy.", he answers, totally not understanding what taehyung actually means, making him sigh again.
"do you have to throw up?", he asks.
jeongguk shakes his head. "already did earlier."
"come on i'm giving you new clothes, you smell like alcohol. your breath smells like alcohol too, let's brush your teeth yeah?"
jeongguk nods, knowing he'll maybe feel better then because he's actually feeling really dirty right now.
jeongguk makes his way to taehyung's bathroom, where his blue toothbrush also is next to taehyung's pink one.
he's struggling a little bit but he brushes his teeth, liking the taste of fresh mint when he's done.
he goes back to taehyung's room, accepting the clothes taehyung gives him. just some sweatpants and an t-shirt that's too big for taehyung, since they're not wearing the same size. but taehyung mostly wears oversized clothes anyway, so it's fine.
"let me help you.", taehyung says as he sees jeongguk again just sitting on the bed, not moving.
taehyung comes closer, taking off his t-shirt for him and putting on the new one.
he starts opening jeongguk's pants, opening the zipper. jeongguk raises his hips a little so taehyung can slide them down his butt. then he slides them down his legs, until he's wearning nothing but his boxers. then tae helps him putting on the new, fresh smelling sweatpants.
he gets up to put jeongguk's dirty clothes into the laundry basket.
"let's go to sleep yeah? lay down."
jeongguk lays down in taehyung's bed, waiting for him to join him.
"tae i need love from you.", he says in his drunk state.
"i always show you love gguk."
"can i get a kiss? pleasee?"
taehyung leans in to place a kiss on jeongguk's lips. looking at his face after that and tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.
"i don't know how you can be happy like this.", taehyung whispers, caressing his cheek.
"i love you taetae."
i wish you would show me that when you're sober too.
"so much.", he shows with his hands how big his love for him is, like a little kid, making taehyung actually giggle now.
"let's sleep ggukie."
"i love you."
"i love you too."
1 month later
taehyung and jeongguk already had a lot of arguments because jeongguk barely spends any time with taehyung. but jeongguk just won't understand. he would apologize but then continue with what he's been doing.
it's saturday and jeongguk promised taehyung that he would come to his house now, but taehyung is literally freaking out when it's 10pm and he didn't hear anything from jeongguk the whole day.
he isn't picking up his phone.
jimin helped taehyung to get yugyeoms number and he immediately calls.
"hello?"
"yugyeom. it's me taehyung. i wanted to ask if jeongguk is with you."
"ohhh taehyung. guys it's jeongguk's loverboy!" taehyung can hear some laughing in the background.
"yes he's with us taehyung. wanna party with us?"
taehyung is fucking mad now.
he hangs up and quickly walks to his car, driving to yugyeoms house.
taehyung enters the building, coughing when he steps inside and there is so much smoke. he makes his way looking for jeongguk.
he arrives the livingroom where a couple is making out on the couch, empty vodka bottles on the floor. then he sees the terrace and quickly walks there.
"jeongguk?!", he asks, seeing jeongguk sitting on a chair.
"damn he's cute.", someone comments but taehyung just ignores it.
"tae.", he says a little shocked but then his face turns into a smile.
"come here baby."
taehyung immediately notices that he's not sober.
he comes closer, looking at his eyes to see that they're red and he can barley open them.
"did he do drugs again?!", he asks the others and they start laughing. he knows it's only weed but he can't help but to freak out. who knows how often jeongguk is doing that or other stuff. taehyung doesn't want him to get addicted to anything. also he normally wouldn't freak out over weed, but the fact that he let taehyung hang again just to sit on this stupid chair stoned as hell, is what makes him mad.
"relax taehyung it's just weed. we have some left. wanna try?"
"god.", he says angrily, turning to jeongguk again.
"we're going home.", he says and grabs jeongguks's hand to pull him up.
"come on taehyung, don't ruin the party.", someone of jeongguk's friends say.
"you can continue with whatever the fuck you're doing. we're going.", he says, dragging jeongguk with him.
"tae baby, not so fast." taehyung doesn't listen and continues until they reach his car. they both get in.
but taehyung doesn't start the car, he just sits there looking at the street while jeongguk is eyeing him from the side.
then taehyung starts crying.
he starts sobbing.
"you didn't message me the whole fucking day and then you come here just to get high? while i'm waiting for you and worry?!", he cries.
"tae-"
"you promised me you wouldn't do it again."
he cries.
"you show up only when you're drunk and can't go home. when you don't stay over at your friend's place of course."
he doesn't know if jeongguk can ever understand what he's saying in his sudden condition. high as hell.
"you know what? fuck this.", he says and starts the car, knowing that it's useless talking to him right now.
"you can't drive while crying."
"and you can't drive while being fucking high, can you?", he snaps, making jeongguk look away and not say a word again.
then they drive to taehyung's house.
~
"tae baby let's talk tomorrow okay, i'm really tired.", he says while still being high and laying on taehyung's bed as taehyung is changing into his pyjamas.
he starts sobbing again. he can't help it. jeongguk is neglecting him for a long time now and if that wasn't already enough, he starts doing drugs. he's sure as hell he didn't do coke only once. god knows if he also did other stuff.
he didn't message taehyung the whole day, making taehyung feel like he doesn't give a shit about him.
the parties and the drugs must be more important
it hurts him. it hurts him so bad.
if jeongguk wanted to smoke weed so badly he could tell that taehyung and they could do it together.
is he not good enough now because he doesn't do coke or drinks until he feels like dying? them and their other friends used to have a lot of fun, did jeongguk completely forget about that?
"tae.", jeongguk sits up now to pull him close but taehyung snaps his hands away.
"don't touch me.", he cries.
"baby."
"no. i hate you. i hate you so much.", he sobs.
"don't say that.", he says and pulls taehyung close now and honestly taehyung is too weak and too tired to fight. he hates himself for not being able to push jeongguk away, feeling desperate and pathetic for falling into his arms because he misses his touch too much.
"you smell like alcohol. i hate it.", he cries.
"i'm sorry."
"you're not."
"i'm sorry.", he just repeats but taehyung doesn't answer. he continues crying as they lay down and both of them fall asleep soon.
~
"jeongguk it's been months now and i already gave you too many chances and i think it's the best for us to break up."
"what?!"
"you're free then, you can hang out with your friends whenever you want. isn't that what you wanted?"
"tae no, you can't break up with me please. i went to a lot of parties yes, but that doesn't mean i don't love you-"
"you didn't fucking care about me anymore as soon as you were with your friends. yesterday you went too far jeongguk. way too far. and i'm not doing this anymore. if the parties are really more important than me.. fine. do what you want. but i will not be in this kind of relationship."
"taehyung please.", his eyes fill with tears and it's so god damn hard for taehyung to not get soft. not to mention that he could also start crying any moment but he has to stay strong.
"it's over jeongguk. please leave now."
"what?"
"i said it's over."
jeongguk looks at him with big eyes as tears leave them.
"you can't do that."
"i can. go now. you can pick up your clothes some other time. just leave already."
"i thought you loved me.", he says with so much pain in his voice.
"i loved you jeongguk but you didn't love me enough."
he just stares at him with big eyes crying.
"i'm going to take a shower. when i'm out i want you to be gone already.", he says and leaves the room. he locks himself in the bathroom, listening to jeongguk's footsteps as he's going downstairs and probably leaving the house.
then taehyung breaks down.
~
jeongguk didn't stop crying the whole day.
he never thought that taehyung would break up with him. it's killing him.
yet he decided to drink his pain away.
*2 weeks later*
taehyung is crying every day. his other friends and jeongguk's "old" friends, are trying to cheer him up, calling him and asking him if he wants them to bring food, but he always says no.
jeongguk on the other hand is drinking or doing drugs every night.
he sees it as a way to cope but of course that's just horrible.
he's drunk crying as he's standing in front of yoongi's door at 3 am.
he hasn't talked to his "old friends" in a long time, since he was only meeting his new friends. he, taehyung and the others were a friendgroup of 7 people but he ruined it.
"jeongguk? it's 3 am are you crazy-"
"i messed up yoongs.", he sobs.
yoongi notices how he's struggling with even standing still.
"goddamnit.", he says and pulls jeongguk inside, going to the livingroom with him.
"jeongguk what are you doing?", he asks disappointed, hating to see his "best friend" in this condition.
"i fucked everything up."
"yes you did."
"i lost tae."
"i know."
"make the pain go away.", he sobs.
of course it hurts yoongi.
he knows that it would be useless to give him advice now because the next morning he wouldn't even remember.
"jeongguk let's go to sleep okay? we'll talk tomorrow when you're sober."
"i want tae.", he cries and yoongi sighs, helping jeongguk to stand up. then they make their way upstairs.
~
"you have to stop all that jeongguk. the parties, the drinking, the drugs. if you really want taehyung back you have to show him that you're willing to change for him."
jeongguk just looks down, feeling like absolute shit.
"you don't have to stop going to parties completely, no one is expecting you to do that. but you need balance jeongguk if you want to be in a relationship with tae. you can't just leave him alone for weeks, do you know how he's been feeling all this time? you were having fun every night, probably not even thinking of him, while he can't sleep, wondering if you tried any new drugs and how you're doing."
"of course i thought about him...", he mumbles.
"yeah but still couldn't even send him a text to let him know everything's fine."
"i fucked up i know.", he says, feeling ashamed. everyone must have realized how bad jeongguk was treating taehyung.
"come on now jeongguk it's actually so damn easy.", yoongi makes the other look at him directly now.
"what's more important? the things i just mentioned or tae?"
"tae of course!"
"see? what's the problem then? don't be so fucking weak jeongguk. drinking your problems away. what do you think you're doing? you have to fight for tae."
"and how?"
"you have to figure that out yourself. but the first very big step is to stop with all that. show taehyung that you're really fighting for him."
~
it's been a month since jeongguk hasn't touched alcohol or drugs ever again. he didn't go to any party with yugyeom and the others.
he's trying to call taehyung every day, even shows up at his house but taehyung would just send him away again, saying that he doesn't want to see him.
he also tries to call him a lot but he just wouldn't pick up. or he picks up, jeongguk asks him what he's doing and he just replies with "i'm busy." and ends the phone call.
that left jeongguk wondering if taehyung has someone new already but he doesn't even want to think about it.
jeongguk bought flowers, taehyung's favorite chocolate and candy and he made a little photo book with pictures and letters of them. he also bought him pretty silver earrings, knowing they will suit him too well.
they've been dating for almost two years, before jeongguk had to... fuck it up.
nervously he rings on taehyung's doorbell and he almost gasps when he sees him. he looks so beautiful.
"jeongguk.", taehyung is looking at the flowers and the bag in jeongguk's hands.
"hey. i-i brought you flowers.", he stutters nervously and if they were still dating taehyung would laugh at his cuteness now.
"you didn't have to do that."
"please take them.", he says, looking directly into his eyes. taehyung thinks about it for a couple seconds before he takes the flowers and thanks him.
"can i come inside? please tae, i want to talk to you."
"jeongguk i told you-"
"please tae."
the last month was hell for taehyung. everytime after jeongguk showed up or called him and taehyung acted so cold towards him, he would start crying, missing him too much to handle.
he takes a deep breath
"fine."
jeongguk follows him to his room upstairs, still having the bag in his hands.
then they both sit down on the edge of taehyung's bed.
"i didn't drink or do drugs for a month now."
"okay."
"i'm not hanging out with yugyeom and the others anymore-"
"jeongguk you don't have to tell me that. we're not together anymore, i don't care."
"listen bab- tae. i know that i fucked up i really know and i'm so unbelievably sorry. i was so stupid to neglect you for these stupid parties and i'm sorry that i made you feel like you're not that important to me anymore. but tae, i swear you're everything to me. i can't live without you.", his eyes fill with tears again.
"i'm so lost without you and i feel so empty. even though i don't deserve you i want you back- no i need you back. i'm so miserable, i can't continue like this.", he lets all his feelings out, because yes, the last month was pure hell for him too.
"i would spend every second with you to prove you i finally stopped. i'm not doing those things anymore, because i only need you. but please tae please give me another chance."
taehyung stares into his eyes for a couple seconds, before he looks down.
"ever do something like back then again and you're never seeing me again."
jeongguk starts smiling widely.
"so you're giving me a chance?"
"yes."
he tightly wraps his arms around taehyung's waist who immediately hugs him back by his neck.
"i love you."
"i love you too.", taehyung smiles at him.
he has seen that jeongguk really put effort, trying to win taehyung back again. that's why he's giving him another chance. not to mention that he also can't live without jeongguk.
"oh here i brought some things for you.", he says and grabs the bag. taehyung opens it and smiles when he sees his favorite candy and chocolate.
then he takes out the photo book and he smiles and he also gets sad at the beautiful memories before jeongguk had changed.
"i was such an asshole. i really don't know what's gotten into me. i'm sorry."
"it's okay.", he smiles at him with tears in his eyes, what hurts jeongguk.
then he takes out the little box.
"gguk what is this?"
"open it."
he gasps after doing so.
"gguk! these are so pretty!", he says excitedly and runs to the mirror to put them on.
"i'm glad you like them baby.", jeongguk stands up now too.
when taehyung is finished with putting them on jeongguk stands next to him, looking at him in the mirror.
"you look beautiful."
taehyung turns around to wrap his arms around his neck.
"thank you.", he thanks him and places a kisss on his lips.
he's so happy to finally have him back.