1.
When i was a toddler
There were few things i wanted to be
Admired
Famous
Pretty
Loads of things
But as i went on growing
It stuck me its not that easy
To be any of those
So i refined my ideals a bit
And it turned into an ideal girl thing
Yes that was it
But i am not an ideal girl or teenager either
Now when i look at myself
And think
I feel proud
Now that's funny Arya
You haven't achieved anything still you feel proud?
How the fuck?
But yes i do
I feel proud of being me
Of being Arya
Of all the things i could be
I am me
And i am
Pretty
Intelligent
Admired
And i know that
And i don't need anybody to tell me that
I know who i am
I have been through a lot
Yet i haven't lost myself
Yet
I survived
I breathe
I live
I steal moments of happiness in this chaos
I love
I laugh
Yes
I fight
I am me
2.If you would been some sea
I'd be drowned right now
If it would be fire
I'd have burned out
If it would be alcohol
I'd too high to control
If I'd be some character
I'd have been immersed in it right now
If I'd be heaven
I'd be at leisure right now
If I'd be poetry
I'd be writing you masterpieces
If I'd be love
It would be the greatest world had ever seen.
3.What if the love we have is just a illusion?
What if love feels completely different?
What if we never will own each other?
What if we will never have a forever?
What if we will loose all the moments we had?
What if all of them become memories?
No
Freeze
This can't be
You are my treasury
Only one who matches my energy
This is no lie
I wanna cry and
DIE...
4.Then there is a my heart
Under layers of chains
That's holding it tight
Suffocating
Love leaking out
Blood oozing on every direction...