Eek POV
It's been two days since sean died and india just been locked in her room. Not really saying much. She been getting closer with that girl dior but she hasn't talked to her brother yet.
I know she needs time that's why i'm letting her be. A close friend of hers died and her brother who has been MIA for years came back all in the same day. I know she's hurting I just wanna help her.
Why it seem like y'all don't gaf that sean died lmaoo - ms. author
I also been getting better I can walk on my own and i'm almost all the way straight. Hope was in my bed watching coca melon and eating some gummy's. I walk over to india's door and I knock softly.
"yes" she says softly making me sigh and walk in seeing her in a sports bra and shorts. Her body shape fye. Eww wtf stop. I shake the thought out of my head and walk over to her bed and sit next to her legs that were dangling off the bed.
"sysy" I say softly rubbing her back.
She didn't reply she just sat there as I rubbed her back. I couldn't help but to think this is my fault. If I told them what my baby moms said. She said if they weren't careful someone was gonna die, and I didn't tell anyone.
I forgot homegirl name lmao so ima just call her baby momma tell I find out. I think it was kaylanie but idk for sure lol yall help me- ms.author.
"We have to talk to dave." She says lowly
"wym why"
"I mean me, killa, and mir are still technically in his gang so we have to either put shit to the side or leave the gang for good."
"what do you wanna do?"
"I mean of course i don't wanna do this shit for life but it's all i know. It's what I grew up on so idk how to feel or what to do. I also can't imagine no being in this shit with you." She says head now resting on my shoulder.
I sigh hard " I know . Now that i'm out it just feels like I left y'all. We were all inner circle we had each others backs."
"yea. It's fine tho. Your still our inner circle and we still love you." she says looking at me making me smile.
"Hey sy- oh sorry am I interrupting something?" dior comes in and asks
"Oh no sis you fine come sit." india says making her sit beside india.
"Also you need to talk to your brother. Both of y'all." I say making them both roll their eyes.
"I knowwwww" They say together making me laugh.
"I'll talk to my brother tomorrow and dior you can call your brother and tell him come down here tomorrow deal?"
"deal"
"dada" hope says coming and hugging my leg.
"Oouu the whole gang's here lets have a movie night." India says getting excited.
We all agreed because this is the most she talked and the happiest she's been in a while. I just love seeing her stress free and happy. We all get snacks and got on india's bed as we started the movie.
The next day...
India POV
I wake up and seen eek, dior and hope in my bed. I smile in awe at them. I love them so much and I just meet dior. I already love her.
I took the moments to admire lijah. He was so fine but ion even look at him like that. Like we been in this since the sandbox, but he just make me so happy. All the pain and problems go away when he around.Last time I felt like this was with my first love but i don't wanna take it there with him.
Who I talk to bout my pain and my problems I ain't the same but i'm trying- purrr my fav toot.
I looked down at my wrist at the cuts that I been giving myself for the past 2 days. I haven't done this in years. Since my first love but all that seemed to start rushing back. A tear fell down my face but I quick wiped it and got up going into the bathroom.
I took a shower and brushed my teeth throwing on a shirt and some shorts.
I went out and put a jacket on to cover my scars. I seen eek sitting up on the bed when I walked in he looked from my feet to my face making my stomach have light butterflies.
Girl wtf we pimping stop what you doing.
"Why you got that jacket on india." He said making me look down at my feet. He knows that I used to cut myself and when he calls me india ik he mad.
"I-it was a little cold." I say shrugging and sitting on the bed.
"Well it's not anymore." he says getting up and walking between my legs pulling the jacket off.
"eek no stop it's fi-" i get cut off by the jacket yanked off me and him grabbing my wrist. I look up at him and seen that his blood was boiling.
"India wtf!" he yells making dior and hope jump out of their sleep.
"Dior can you take hope to your room." he says in a calm tone before looking back at me.
"Why you doing this again huh?" he says semi-yeling.
"eek i'm not finna do this with you." I say trying to walk out the room but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back making me hiss from the pain of the cuts being pushed down on.
"No you doing it today India why tf you doing this shit? Tf you on bruh." He says yelling
"eek I don't wanna talk about this shit okay?" I say yelling back making him scrunch his face up.
"whatever bra." He says walking out of the room slamming my door and soon heard the front door slam making me plop on the bed and cry.
Eek POV throwback- 2 weeks after india's first love died.
"Sysyyyyy" I yell walking into india's house. I wanted to surprise her with food and just someone to talk to because I know she been going through it.
When I yelled I didn't hear anything so I looked through the first level of the house and went up stairs checking every room. No sign of her but i knew she was there because her car was there and she hasn't been anywhere since yk.
I knock on the bathroom door before walking in.
"Sysy i know your dumb ass not-" I get cut off by the sight of india in the bathtub full of red water with shorts in a sports bra on.
I drop the food and run over to her and notice both of her arms are filled with bleeding out cuts.
"india, india gtf up." I yell shaking her seeing her eyes flutter but close back. I quickly take my shirt off and rip it in half putting it over her cuts to stop the bleeding. I get her up and ran to my car before rushing to the hospital.
I kept my hand by her heart as I heard it get slower and slower.
flash back over...
I slam the door to the house and get in my car. I started to think about when I found her in the tub half dead.
That really scared me that's what she doesn't know, so to see her cutting herself again just makes me think about it everytime I close my eyes I see her in that tub. I think about what would have happened if I didn't show up when I did. I thank god that I did.
I start the car and just seat back and listened to music as I drove to nowhere in particular just to clear my head.
These mixed signals, mixed signals, they're killin' me
I don't know what you want, but I know what I need
The 'goodbyes', the 'hellos', the 'I need you' 'no I don't'
Every time I start to close the door, you knock and I let you in
Lovin' you is my greatest sin
Lovin' you is my greatest sin
Lovin' you is my greatest sinI don't know why I love you
I don't know why I stay
Yeah, yeah
I don't know if it's worth it, babeLook, uh
Sorry I missed your call, I was on a jet
I been so zoned out, tryna figure out what's next
So scared to fail, I'm calculatin' my every step (yeah)
Gotta watch my back and keep my strap, but nonetheless (nonetheless)
I think about you when I'm gone (yeah), wishin' I could hold you
Probably home, wishin' someone come and love you how they 'posed to
And I hope you see this letter 'fore it's too late (yeah)
I hope chasin' my dreams don't get in the way
I blame my struggles and my uncles for my hustlin' ways
I'm way in Michigan right now, lookin' at real estate
Lord knows I wanna lay ya down but I'm chasin' cake
Can't go back broke, stay on the go, that's all that's on my brainShe tell me fuck you, I hate you (I don't know why I love you)
Then I love you, can't blame you (I don't know why I stay) (blame you)
She say I love you, but don't trust you, can't change you (I don't know if it's worth it)
I just hope we don't end how they do (You know how they be on that front)
Crash and burn on The ShaderoomStreet runner, gotta stop runnin' sometimes (yeah)
I'm in your city tonight (yeah)
And these lights (these lights), make me feel so inspired (yeah)
Goin' higher and higher and higher (yeah, yeah yeah)
Takin' me higher (takin' me higher, takin' me higher, takin' me higher)
Higher and higher and higher (yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah)Hey, I'm kinda glad that you didn't pick up (yeah)
I kinda just called to hear your voice, so
Your voice recording was enough
Uh, I should hang up, what am I doin'? Um
So uh, I feel kinda dumb, but uh
I miss you, I've been thinkin' about you
And I've been thinkin' about our love and how much I miss your touch
I miss bein' around you, hearin' your laugh and holdin' your hand
I think of you every day
I hope and I wish that you're doin' okay
I want us to go back to the old days
Because, I miss you, and I just thought of you, so I thought I'd call you
To tell you that you crossed my mind
And I took that as a sign, that I should call and say hi
So that's all, hi
And I hope you don't think I've lost my mind, I hope you don't think I'm crazy
This message is gettin' long so I just say bye, but
The idea of you listenin' to this, the thought of you on the other side of the line
I'm in your city tonight
And these lights make me feel so inspired (I can't hang up)
You ain't higher and higher and higher
Rodwave played through my speaker. This song make me think of india it's so relatable to her.
To Be Continued....