The shrill sound of her phone ringing wakes Chaeyoung up in the morning.
Grumbling, she squints open her eyes, forcing the groggy feeling at the back of her brain away and reaches over towards her phone. It's about an inch away from her fingertips when she feels someone shuffle closer into her back, the arm around her waist tightening and she grins.
Fuck the phone, she thinks, turning her head and trailing an invisible path up perfectly manicured nails, smooth forearms and toned biceps with her eyes. Finally, she settles on Lisa's face, marveling at it in all its perfection.
Even sleeping Lisa is painfully beautiful. With dark locks cascading over the white pillows, perfect, pouty lips slightly parted as airy breaths escape them and flawless skin cover every inch of her body. Sometimes Chaeyoung doesn't get how Lisa can call her beautiful when mirrors exist.
"Quit staring," Lisa mumbles sleepily, eyes remaining shut. "It's rude."
Chaeyoung feels her entire face light up and chuckles, her available hand reaching out to trace an invisible line around the curve of Lisa's brow, down her cheekbone and along the rim of her upper lip. "I can't help it."
Lisa scrunches up her face, a smile tugging at her lips as she groans and shuffles backwards, loosening her arms from around Chaeyoung. "You're so cheesy."
"Like a cheesy puff," Chaeyoung responds, ignoring her insistent ringtone and rolls until they're facing each other.
She watches slowly as Lisa opens her eyes, revealing the most intense, beautiful dark brown eyes that she's ever known to man. There's something so wonderfully mysterious about them that it kind of makes her want to melt into a puddle of love. She loves the way that one second they can be staring at a Chihuahua (Lisa totally hates them) with a hard, angry edge and then the next, they're aimed at her and they're soft, dreamy and like melted chocolate.
"Hey," she whispers out, nudging their noses together as Lisa’s hand sneaks across to her hip, gripping it as their legs tangle together.
Lisa grins sleepily, squinting one eye against the intruding sunlight. "Hello beautiful."
Blushing, Chaeyoung ducks her head into the crook of her girlfriend's neck, tucking her hands beneath her own chin as they press closer together. "Hi," she whispers shyly, lips brushing across the hollow of Lisa's neck.
"You already said that," Lisa replies, running her hand through blonde locks. Chaeyoung shuts her eyes at the sensation, feeling love and warmth spread across her body and tingle at the base of her spine. "But hello again."
They lay there silently for a few minutes, Lisa’s hand running through Chaeyoung's hair as she breathes in Lisa's scent. She knows she's got to be at work in like, an hour, but the mix of sweet, floral perfume and silky skin coming from Lisa is just making her mouth water with desire.
Licking her lips, she leans forward and presses a soft kiss to Lisa's throbbing pulse point, loving the way it jolts under her touch. Slowly, she moves up, trailing kisses along a defined jawline and up her girlfriend's chin until her top lip brushes against Lisa's bottom.
A quick make out session won't make her late, right?
She pulls back, meeting smiling brown eyes and it almost makes her want to faint with how adoringly they're staring at her. It's ridiculous that for sixteen years, they've been staring at her exactly the same way, but neither of them really noticed. Well, neither of them gave the chance to notice. Too caught up in other things she guesses.
"Morning," she chirps again, leaning forward to press her lips to Lisa's.
For long moments they barely move their lips, content with the mere feeling of them touching but then she feels a hand slide down to her ass, grabbing the curve joining her butt and thigh and pulling until she rolls and lies directly on top of Lisa.
Smiling into the kiss, she tilts her head and deepens it, taking her girlfriend's top lip into her mouth and sucking gently, running her tongue along the edge. A low, throaty groan vibrates into her mouth and hands come around to her back, arms tightening around her waist until there's no room between them. She glides her hands up, tangling into dark locks and securing their faces together, trying to inhale through her nose but failing badly.
Breaking the kiss only for air, Chaeyoung ducks back down, ghosting her lips over Lisa's and humming when her girlfriend shudders from the touch, edging her neck up a little to try and resume kissing. But she doesn't let in. If there's one thing she loves doing to Lisa (among other things) is teasing her. She loves how riled up her girlfriend gets and how Lisa's bottom lip juts out into a small pout.
There's no use though. Chaeyoung basically invented pouting, so it won't work on her. Then again, Lisa doing just about anything is hard to resist.
Flicking her tongue out, she catches the rim of Lisa's upper lip and pulls away quickly, grinning widely. Lisa's face scrunches up, nose crinkling and eyes narrowing as she shakes her head from side to side.
"Ew, Chaeng," Lisa faux whines, "That's gross."
Chaeyoung leans down, nuzzling their noses together. "You love it."
"I love you," Lisa retorts quickly, eyes shining with sincerity. It makes Chaeyoung's heart flip and do multiple somersaults and all different kinds of gymnastic crap. Kind of like the stuff she used to do back in Freshman year for Coach Sue.
Sinking back down, Chaeyoung brings their lips back together and doesn't hesitate as she licks her way into Lisa's mouth, tracing the roof of her girlfriend's mouth and curling around her teeth. The hands on her back slide down, slipping underneath the hem of her sleep shirt and trailing their way up the smooth skin of her back. She shudders at the touch, her skin tingling and tries not to groan loudly as Lisa’s fingers slip around to the side of her breast, lingering dangerously close.
"Nuh, uh," Chaeyoung mumbles against soft lips that continue pecking at hers. "I've got to," kiss, "go to," long, slow kiss, "work."
Lisa pulls back with a half-smile, half-pout. Chaeyoung feels her head spin and stomach flutter as she ghosts her lips over her girlfriend's one last time. Barely even touching them but pouring as much emotion into it as a passionate, hungry kiss would.
"Me too."
Tipping forward, she rests her forehead against Lisa’s one and smiles down at Lisa. "I really don't want too."
"Me neither," Lisa replies, sliding her hands up the inside of Chaeyoung's t-shirt and grazing down the skin lightly with her nails. "We could just stay in bed all day," Lisa rubs her thumbs up Chaeyoung's ribs, "And just make out," she leans forward, pressing a kiss to Chaeyoung's lips, "And do stuff."
Giggling, Chaeyoung shakes her head, knowing the offer is seriously tempting. "What kinda stuff?" she cocks an eyebrow playfully.
"Hmm..." Lisa pretends to ponder, eyes roaming above Chaeyoung's head and looking at nothing. Seconds late they return. "NC-17 rated stuff me thinks."
Loving the idea, Chaeyoung grinds down subconsciously (even though there's a little part of her that thinks maybe she just likes teasing Lisa) and feels her hips meet Lisa's, the bulge in her girlfriend's boxers press against the apex of her own thighs. They both groan simultaneously.
"Baby, you can't do that," Lisa whines, "Not when we actually have to get up."
Chaeyoung grins before pecking Lisa's lips once, twice, three times and then rolls off, throwing the comforter off in the process. The sensation of the cool air piercing her skin after the warmth makes her grimace, but then the bed dips behind her and tanned legs hang either side of her body. She feels Lisa's arms snake around her midsection, palms pressing flat to her abs and sinks into the embrace, bowing her back slightly.
Soft kisses are pressed to the skin of her shoulder, trailing up towards her neck and then stopping just below her earlobe. "I'll be gone for most of the day," Lisa whispers, teeth nipping Chaeyoung's earlobe gently.
"How comes?" Chaeyoung asks, fingers dancing over the back of Lisa's hands until they rest, lacing through with Lisa’s ones. There was a little hope that maybe Lisa would come back from work earlier and then they could do stuff. She glances down, but then Lisa speaks and breaks her out of it.
"Things to do," she hears, and swears she can feel Lisa smile into her neck as she presses her face into it. "People to see."
"Man about a dog?" Chaeyoung continues, grinning to herself.
"Nah," Lisa shakes her head, "Woman about a cat."
It takes a few seconds, but when she replaces the word 'cat' with something a little more vulgar, her mouth drops open and she turns, eyes wide. "Lisa!" She half-yells, releasing one of her hands to slap playfully at her girlfriend's bicep.
Lisa just grins, giggling. "I'm kidding, baby. I only like and want one cat."
"That's..." Chaeyoung narrows her eyes, wondering whether she should be complimented or not. "Confusing, And I think kind of crude."
"S'posed to be complimentary," Lisa mumbles, lips brushing against Chaeyoung's protruding shoulder bone. "I think."
Smiling ridiculously largely considering her girlfriend just made a seriously crude comment, she twists her head, pecking Lisa's lips then pats Lisa’s hands on her abs (careful of the bandaged one) and motions to get up. They tighten their hold, of course, and she rolls her eyes playfully, settling back as she only managed to lift about four inches off the mattress.
"We need to go," she says, a little firmer than before. "Neither of us can be late."
She feels Lisa shrug behind her, follow by; "Jennie can wait. I want my kisses."
Deciding to tease a little, Chaeyoung nods and says, "Let me turn around then," before managing to push through the caramel barrier routing her to her seat. Standing, she turns and presses her hands to each of Lisa's thighs, leaning her weight on them as she bends forward, lips pouted. A second before they kiss, Chaeyoung leans up and kisses a button nose and then the corner of full lips and pulls away.
Lisa just sits there, wide eyed and shocked. There's a knowing smirk crawling up onto her face, but Chaeyoung just arches a brow because seriously, teasing Lisa is one of the best things ever. Especially with morning kisses, or kisses in general actually.
"There's your kisses," Chaeyoung murmurs, smirking and backing away slowly towards the bathroom. "Now get ready."
"Bu-"
"Nuh uh," Chaeyoung lifts her hand, wagging her pointer finger. "Get dressed and we'll see about those kisses."
Then she disappears into the bathroom, making sure to flick the lock on because, well, Lisa.
***
Turns out they were actually a lot later than either of them thought, and Chaeyoung managed to give Lisa a single kiss on the cheek before half-sprinting out the door, hair ruffled and t-shirt still bunched underneath her bra. Pretty funny to see Mrs. Anderson's expression as she leapt down the five step stoop.
Anyway, she knows today is the day where she'll have to face Jaehyun again. First day back at the studio (even though it was supposed to be her second, but Lisa's distracting, okay?) and first time she'll see Jaehyun after that eventful evening outside the theatre. To say she's feeling guilty is pretty much the weakest explanation.
Winter's there when she walks through the entrance of the dance studio. The woman is smiling, half-wary and half-sympathetic because really? What else was she expecting? So far it's only Jisoo and Jennie that know about her and Lisa. Sure, Jaehyun was expecting it, but it hasn't been confirmed. Not to mention, she's incredibly happy for a person who broke up with their fiancé a few days ago. Winter probably thinks she's high.
"Morning, Chaeyoung." Winter says a little too cheery for the time of the morning.
Chaeyoung smiles anyway. She's not one to be rude. "Morning, Winter."
She pauses at the front desk which Winter's occupying, leaning onto her forearms and rocking onto the balls of her feet to peer down the hallway to her right. Usually Jaehyun's in the room down the bottom, top off and music blaring as he glides around the room flawlessly. But not this morning. This morning the door is shut, room blocked off by the wooden panel and there's no trace of music in the air.
"Where's Jaehyun?"
Winter's face pales, features falling like someone just caught her stealing something. "I-I don't k-know, C-Chaeyoung."
It's not exactly a hidden fact that Winter once failed a stutter back in college (that's where they met). It was just one of those nervous things that came out when Winter met new people. Some people pretend to like stuff to fit in, some people accidentally fake an accent, like in Friends with Ross teaching the class. People do silly things when they're nervous, and apparently Winter went down the fake-a-stutter-for-sympathy route.
Chaeyoung's never been one to hold grudges though. Plus, she gets the pressure of meeting new people. Dancers have to do it all the time.
"Is he in?"
Winter bites her bottom lip, glancing around the room to see if anyone's in. Chaeyoung can't tell if it's a ‘save me’ glance or a ‘is anyone there’ one. "He's upstairs at the moment. Having a break."
Chaeyoung’s eyes narrow. "Why? Did he hurt himself or something?"
"No," Winter shakes her head vigilantly. "He was just a bit... sad, earlier."
"Oh." Chaeyoung immediately feels guilty again.
All is well when she's with Lisa, because she doesn't pay much attention to the outside world. When she and Lisa are together, it's like they're in their own little love bubble and no-one can penetrate it no matter what. She almost smiles thinking about it before realizing how weird she'd look.
"Well I'm gonna go set up for the nine o'clock class," she bites her bottom lip. "Warm up a little first."
Winter nods but then exhales heavily like she's relieved, fingers tapping away at the keyboard by the computer. Chaeyoung turns quickly, trying to figure out what the hell's going on because she knows she is. She's not stupid. Contrary to popular opinion. Perception is definitely one of her skills and right now, they're tingling. Kind of like Spiderman and his Spidey Sense.
"What's going on?" Chaeyoung asks, a little surprised that she actually did. Usually she'd just leave it. But this... This seems strange. Winter's never like this. Quiet, sure. But judgemental? Never.
Winter sucks in her lips, pausing her movement and looks up. "N-nothing, Chaeyoung. Why?"
"You're hiding something." Wow, seems Lisa has really got inside of her. No pun intended. "What's going on?"
The woman's mouth drops open, but then the door to the right, the one leading to the staff area upstairs, opens and Jaehyun steps out, eyes smiling as they land on Winter, but face faltering when they find Chaeyoung's presence.
Jaehyun lowers his gaze, tucking his hands into his pockets, straightening his elbows and rocking awkwardly. Seriously, she's never got why people do that. It may seem like they're making it less awkward, but it just increases it. Pointing out the blatant tension lingering in the air only makes it ten times worse.
"Hey, Jaehyun." Chaeyoung decides to start with something small to break the ice.
Winter apparently finds something to do, because she clears her throat, gathers up two folders which Chaeyoung are pretty sure are empty, and heads through to the staff area, head ducked.
"Hey, Chaeyoung." Jaehyun's voice is low, but there's something lingering at the back of it and she can't quite place it.
Chaeyoung sucks in her lips, biting down on them gentle. Jaehyun's just standing there, sadness flashing across his face and tightening the muscles along his defined jawline. She feels bad. Like super bad. It's pretty corny to relate it to a fairy tale, but there's always one person who ends up hurt and alone. Disney never show that part though, do they.
Her mouth drops open to say the words ‘how are you’, but it snaps shut as she realizes exactly how much she doesn't want to hear the answer. Jaehyun just stares at her awkwardly, eyebrow cocking as he mouths pop together and she just tries a smile.
"So," Jaehyun starts off awkwardly. "I've... Got to practice... Dance."
Chaeyoung nods, not questioning his lie. It hurts knowing how dramatically their relationship has changed. Sure, it was pretty unrealistic to think that they could be friends, because that's like having your dog dying but your parents saying we can stuff it for you though. It's just not the same. It sucks.
Guilt passes through her body and she feels heat prick at her eyelids. She can't cry now. Not in front of Jaehyun. She won't. He's too nice and she wants to feel bad. She has too. It's the least she deserves for what she did to him.
"Sure," she sucks in a shaky breath. "I'll see you around."
"Yeah..." Jaehyun ducks his head and walks past her swiftly. "See you around."
Chaeyoung runs upstairs before the tears become too much.
***
It's encoded into her to dial Lisa's number when she cries. It's like muscle memory or something and her body knows instantly to search for her phone and type in the number from heart. As always, the line only dials twice before she hears Lisa's voice down the other end. Never fails to bring a smile to her face, no matter the mood.
"Hey baby." Chaeyoung sniffles and she hears Lisa's breath still down the line. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
"N-nothing," she replies, running her sleeve underneath her nose to wipe away the tears. "I j-just..."
"Chaeng, hun, I'm here. Take a deep breath and tell me what's wrong." Lisa's voice isn't irritated nor demanding, just concerned.
"I s-saw him and I just-" her sentence is cut off when she sobs loudly. Sitting in the corner of the room with her knees pulled up to her chest is ridiculous. Something a teenager would do, but there's some weird melancholy about the position that makes her feel a little at ease. God, she's even starting to sound like Lisa now.
"Saw who? Who's ass do I have to kick?"
Chaeyoung chuckles through the tears, eyes crinkling. "No-one Lisa, I just," she exhales heavily and tries to calm her sobs. They're minimizing, especially with the sound of her girlfriend's voice down the line – but still present. However, Lisa always makes her feel better so it won't belong till she's smiling. "I ran into Jaehyun and he just looked so... sad."
She dips her head, forehead resting against her kneecap as her thoughts lead away. Sad totally isn't the right word.
Sad implies a child losing it's toy, or a dog having it's bone taken away from it.
Sad describes the feeling you get when you see an old person alone at the supermarket, reaching for something they're quite obviously not tall enough to get.
Sad is definitely not the right word to describe how Jaehyun looked. Devastated would probably be closer to home.
"Chaeng, I'm sorry."
Chaeyoung lifts her head, brows furrowed. "Why are you sorry?"
There's a few seconds of silence before Lisa answers. "It would never have happened if I had got my head out my ass sooner. I just..." Lisa breathes out heavily down the phone and Chaeyoung flinches at the hurt she feels from that simple action. She can practically hear her girlfriend clawing at her head down the phone. If there's one thing people don't know about Lisa, is that no matter what façade or expression she puts up, she feels everything. Bitch, she may be, but she's definitely not heartless - despite appearances saying otherwise. "I hate that you have to live with the consequences."
"Hun," Chaeyoung starts, eyes sliding from side to side as she tries to find the right words to say. "We're both to blame. But I don't care what happened or how long it took or whatever... Because I have you. We're together now and it doesn't matter how many times I see Jaehyun or how devastated he looks, because it's worth every second I spend with you."
Lisa laughs lightly down the phone. "You have no idea how much I love you Park Chaeyoung. Despite all your cheesy speeches."
"Like you can talk about cheesy speeches Miss Five-Smiles," she replies through a grin, curling her arm around her legs.
"Hey! No fair!"
Chaeyoung chuckles. "I'm joking, Lisa. I love you, too."
"Psht," she can practically hear the eye roll down the line. "If it weren't for my cheesy speech you wouldn't be saying that, Park. That speech got me my girl."
Who knew two words as insignificant as 'my' and 'girl' combined could make Chaeyoung's insides feel like thousands of glitter bombs just exploded. She smiles sappily, breathing out through her nose and dips her head. Even though Lisa's hear doesn't mean she can't blush still.
"You're blushing."
Chaeyoung frowns, eyes darting around the room in search for a certain someone. No-one's there, though. Just an empty room and a water cooler in the far right hand corner of the room that keeps randomly bubbling. Creepy.
"How d'you know?"
"I can hear the blood practically rushing to your cheeks."
Lisa knows her so well. "You being all affectionate takes some getting used too, s'all." She shrugs.
"Well I'm going to be even more affectionate tonight, and not in the down'n'dirty way."
Excited and intrigued, Chaeyoung grins widely, all previous feelings of guilt dissolving and presses on. "Like a surprise?"
"You know it, Chaeng. Now I gotta go, but please try and avoid Jaehyun. It'll totally ruin tonight."
"How sensitive of you, Lisa." Chaeyoung licks her lips and dances her fingers along the ridge of her kneecap.
"S'how I do," Lisa replies in a fake ghetto accent. Chaeyoung's pretty sure she fell in love with a complete dork. It multiplies her feelings by like, a million.
"Bye, Lisa." Chaeyoung rolls her eyes, grinning like a complete idiot.
"Love you."
Shaking her head to try and wipe off the ridiculous smile, Chaeyoung presses the phone closer to her lips and whispers, "Love you too," before listening for the grin coming down the phone and hanging up.
***
Teaching dancing has always been her passion.
Well, technically, dancing has always been her passion, but she totally loves kids, so combined into a job - it's super awesome. She's managed to avoid Jaehyun the majority of the day, apart from when their classes mixed, but that was just unavoidable. Despite the sheer excitement she feels for her surprise tonight - when it comes to surprises she basically turns into a child - Jaehyun's expressions still manage to strum the strings on her guilt guitar.
She knows why she feels guilty - apart from the obvious reason of her dumping his sweet ass because she was madly in love with her best friend - it's just because someone as good-hearted and pure as Jaehyun shouldn't have sad, sullen eyes that used to sparkle once upon a time. He shouldn't be floundering around to depressing music in the studio, falling to his knees and dropping his head with every last note when he can happily body pop his way through a Flo Rida number.
That's just not Jaehyun.
His smile, his charm, his innocence and generally bright aura was the thing that attracted Chaeyoung to him. Without it, it's just like watching a ghost, and she seriously hates that because she knows it's all because of her.
Which kind of leads to her next point.
The funny thing is, during their breaks (when she grabs a drink or sits in the corner of the room smiling goofily at her phone because Lisa just sent her a super dorky text) she hasn't missed the several strange glances Winter's been sending Jaehyun. Sure, there was a rumor way back that Winter had a thing for Jaehyun, but then she started dating one of the single dad's who watched their 'little princesses' dance classes - so Chaeyoung always assumed it was what it was. A rumor.
And it's not like she's jealous, because if there was a word that was the complete opposite of jealous, that would be her.
It's just that she kind of feels like she's obligated to bring a smile back to Jaehyun's face considering she was the one that took it away. Of course it'll be awkward, because yeah, hello ex-fiancé, but they've got to get over it at some point. Or at least push past it. And if that rumor was indeed true, then maybe Winter is the new path to Jaehyun's happiness. Maybe now instead of an interracial path, there's like some Asian Sensation path that they can hop on and have many Asian babies with.
Then maybe Chaeyoung can get Jaehyun back to what they were before she started dating him. Maybe somewhere along the line, months or years in the future, they can be friends again.
Maybe.