The sun leaked through the small window in the room Bellamy and I had been given to stay in. Morning had crept upon Sanctum, bringing with it a new day.
I should have felt relieved, felt safe, knowing that we were allowed to remain in this seemingly safe haven, but I couldn't shake the dark thoughts from my mind.
Octavia was out there- most likely all alone. I feared that she was no longer alive, knowing that was worst case scenario.
Bellamy had awoken not long after I had, the two of us tangled together in bed, but neither saying a single word for the better part of an hour.
"What are you thinking about?" I finally asked, the sun now higher and brighter in the sky, causing me to turn my back to the window.
Bellamy shifted, allowing me to lay my head against his bare chest. I let out a low sigh as I listened to the slow rhythm of his heartbeat.
His hand pushed the hair from my face as he stared ahead, his eyes distracted. "Same thing as you."
I looked up at him. "How do you know what I'm thinking about?" I challenged quietly.
He cracked the smallest of smiles. "Because I know you better than anyone."
I exhaled, laying my head back on his chest as he ran his finger up and down my back absentmindedly.
"Did I do the wrong thing? Should I have let her come back?" Bellamy wondered, his voice cracking slightly- either the result of these being some of the first words he had spoken this morning, or because of the emotions he was feeling.
I was silent for a moment as I thought about his question. I didn't know what my answer was.
While I wholeheartedly agreed that Octavia wasn't the girl she used to be. She was ruthless, violent, and lost...but she was still Octavia, right? I wasn't entirely sure I could answer that question either.
I thought about what I would have done in this situation. All those years ago, when Finn had gone rogue, I hadn't been able to look past the fact that he was my brother. I almost ignored the fact that he was a murderer, too caught up with the boy he used to be.
But now here we were, all of us were murderers in some form or another. So what made some of us more moral than others? The motivation behind our killings? The guilt?
After a few moments of thinking, I replied to Bellamy. My voice was low, proving the uncertainty in my answer. "No."
Bellamy stilled for a moment, and beneath my head I could hear his heartbeat slow slightly, he was relieved by my answer.
"You made the right decision for the group. As hard as it is to accept, Octavia might have jeopardized our future here. " I assured. "I know how hard it was for you, but I know why you did it, Bell. "
Bellamy seemed to hear the words I said, but didn't fully digest them. "She's my sister." he whispered. "And I left her to die."
I quickly shifted, flipping so I was looking up at him. His hand fell from my back as I reached up, cupping his face in my hands. "Don't." I ordered sternly. "Don't think like that."
His eyes were soft as he stared back at me, trying to think of another way to incriminate himself.
"Stop it, Bellamy." I demanded.
He let out a small sigh. "You don't even know what I'm going to say."
A smile spread across my face as I nodded. "Yes, I do. I know you better than anyone."
He couldn't resist the small smile that spread across his face at my repetition of the words he had said to me minutes later.
"I love you." he muttered, flipping us before pressing a kiss to my lips.
A small laugh flew from my throat, only to be caught between mine and Bellamy's lips. He held onto me tightly, and I could tell he was doing anything to try and forget about what he had done.
Just as I pulled away for a moment, the door to our room flew open, revealing a figure.
I let out a small scream as Bellamy scrambled to cover up my top half that was currently bare.
"Whoops." Murphy muttered, a sly grin on his face as he looked between Bellamy and I. "Guess I should have knocked."
I gave Bellamy a quick look as I clutched onto the sheets that were now covering me. "What the hell do you want?" I snapped at Murphy, my face already reddening.
He jabbed a thumb over his shoulder. "Clarke wants you downstairs in the tavern." he explained. "Something about a party?"
I nodded firmly. "Thanks." I muttered. "Now get out."
Raising his hands in surrender, Murphy slowly backed out into the hall. However, before he could get all the way out, he stuck his head back in and winked at Bellamy, shooting him a thumbs up.
Bellamy's face reddened in anger as he sat up. "Murphy, get the hell out!" he snapped, his booming voice sending Murphy scrambling down the hall.
With his chest still heaving in anger, Bellamy turned to me. The minute he looked at me, I couldn't help the loud laugher that fell from my lips.
"What's so funny?" he demanded, his anger slowly fading.
I shook my head as the laughter continued coming. "Nothing." I assured. Because, honestly, I didn't really know what had me laughing so hard.
He tried to fight the smile as he pulled himself out of bed. "Come on." he advised. "We'd better get down there before Murphy starts telling stories."
---
As Bellamy and I made our way down the stairs, I was instantly met with the delicious smells of baking. People buzzed around the tavern, carrying trays of cookies, cakes and everything in between.
An excited smile spread across my face as I looked over to Bellamy. I couldn't recall the last time I had eaten something other than algae or cheap rations.
Our group was crowded near the stairs when Bellamy and I joined them. Each of them wore curious glances as the looked around at the scene.
"Murphy and Emori?" Bellamy wondered as we joined the group of them, noting that our unwanted guest from earlier was no longer here.
"Just left to guard the transport ship with the others." Jordan explained.
"Murphy missing a chance to act like a druknen fool?" Echo muttered. "Now I'm worried."
"He'll be fine." Raven assured as she gave an unsteady look around. "Maybe the rest of us should go there, too."
Jordan's eyes widened slightly. "What? No! I need this."
I looked over at him, letting out a small laugh as Bellamy did the same from beside me. "Young love." I muttered with a joking look of awe.
"I'm literally older than you." Jordan challenged.
"Technically." I argued. "But I've got years and years of wisdom and experience."
"Experience in what?" he wondered, a small grin spreading across his face.
"Okay. Enough." I ordered, giving him a warning glance, despite the small smile that was playing on my lips.
Clarke looked around at the group of us, bringing to conversation back to focus. "We're guests of the Primes. If we isolate ourselves on the ship, they may take offence."
"Jordan?" Delilah called from behind us. "Guys, come on."
We all turned to see that all the occupants of the tavern were slowly making their way outside, excited chatter following them.
Clarke didn't need to be asked twice. She gave us all a small smile before turning and following after Jordan who had already beelined it toward Delilah.
Echo, Bellamy, Raven and I held more reservations with the other two, but nonetheless, we all dispersed.
"I'll be at the bar." Raven muttered, already making her way toward it. As much as I wanted to follow after her, I wanted to see what this Opening Ceremony was all about.
Bellamy seemed to be on the same page as me. He took a hold of my hand, leading me out toward the palace where everyone else had gathered.
"I'm just wondering when we get to eat the food." I mumbled, my eyes travelling around the bustling crowd.
Echo let out a small snort next to me, while Bellamy shook his head in disapproval.
"Come on!" Delilah mused, pulling Jordan through the crowd. "You don't want to miss first confession."
A loud musical horn sounded off in the air, as people reached out in hopes of getting a handshake from Delilah. It was like she was royalty.
Certain members of the crowd held bouquets of flowers, others wore them in their hair. The scene was beautiful, but there was something about it that unnerved me.
"Welcome, to Naming Day."
The voice carried across the crowd, and I soon found myself looking up toward the palace where Russell and his wife, Simone, stood. They were joined by Kaylee and another women. All of them were dressed up, signalling the prestige of this event.
Loud cheers sounded as Russell continued. "Today we observe the four pillars of Sanctum. They are?"
The answer came from the crowd, sounding almost like a series of chants. "Repent, renew, rejoice, rebirth."
I felt a small sense of unease nip at my conscious as I looked over at Bellamy. He wore a passive expression, trying to decipher how to feel.
"Correct." Russel said. "Rebirth. Rebirth! Today we mark the return of our beloved Priya..."
The crowd repeated the same thing Delilah had said to us when referring to Josephine Lightbourne. "Hallowed be her name."
"Indeed. As we bequeath her name to our equally beloved Delilah."
A round of applause flew up, as Delilah smiled widely. With Jordan at her side, she looked around, giving everyone small nods of gratitude.
"As is tradition with every Naming Day," Russell continued. "I will begin the process of making amends. As your leader, it's my job to keep us safe during the Red Sun."
He then turned to his left. "Kaylee...I failed you on this. When I realized you and your family were didn't make it to Ryker's keep before the eclipse. I closed the door. I kept it open as long as I could. Until the life of everyone else was at risk."
"This kind of seems like a personal matter if you ask me." I muttered under my breath, unsure of what this had to do with the "celebration."
Clarke shot me a warning glance as Bellamy fought back the smile that was starting to grow on his face.
"Avery, quiet." Clarke ordered. "And Bellamy, stop encouraging her."
"I didn't say anything." Bellamy argued, the smile still creeping it's way onto his face.
I bit down on the inside of my cheek, preventing myself from laughing as I looked back to the front.
Kaylee and Russell were now embracing one another, and I couldn't tell for sure, but it looked like they were both crying.
Everyone applauded their embrace, excitement flowing across the crowd.
"Now it's your turn." Russell advised as he and Kaylee pulled apart. "Tell your neighbour that you love them. Make amends for those you've hurt. Free yourselves."
I could feel Clarke's eyes on Bellamy and I. It was more than obvious that Russell's words had resonated with her. But I wasn't ready to hear her apology, not yet.
"I'm going to go for a walk." I whispered to Bellamy, in a hurry to get out of the crowd.
"What?"
"I'm going for a walk." I repeated. "I need to clear my head."
He nodded. "I'll come with you."
"No." I argued, giving him a small smile. "I won't be long. Go have a drink, you deserve one."
Reluctantly, Bellamy gave in. "Don't go too far." he ordered, clear uncertainty in his voice.
I gave him a fake salute as I snaked my way through the crowd, needing to get out of there. Groups of people were still hugging, making amends for past wrongs.
Something about it all made me feel uncomfortable. I wasn't entirely sure what it was, but it was something.
With everyone so distracted with the opening ceremony, it was easy for me to slip away unnoticed. Quietly, I made my way toward the staircase, deciding that I would make my way down to the ship.
I wanted to check on Murphy and Emori, but mostly I just wanted to get away from Sanctum, if even for a few minutes.
The sound of the ceremony and crowd slowly lessened as I made my way further and further away from the centre.
It was a bright sunny day, one of beauty and calm as I made my way toward the large fields where our ship was currently stationed.
Despite the senses of uneasiness, I couldn't deny that Sanctum was beautiful. Everything in it seemed in heightened brilliance.
As I neared the lower fields, the feeling that someone was following me quickly set in. My hand unconsciously reached for my waistband, feeling for the gun that was no longer there. The sound of a footstep soon sounded from behind me, and in a split second I was turning around, ready to defend myself.
I instantly froze, my eyes landing on not a guard or one of the rogues from the forest, but a little girl. It didn't take me long to recognize that she was the little girl who had caught my attention yesterday upon the Sactumites arrival. She looked to be no older than four, maybe even younger. I wondered how she had even got out here on her own.
She stared up at me, her big blue eyes full of worry. She didn't say anything, just watched me in silence.
"Hi there." I said softly, looking around for sign of an adult. "Are you okay?"
She gave me a small nod, prompting me to lower myself into a kneel. "Are you all alone out here?"
Once again, she nodded. "I wanted to see where you were going." Her voice was as gentle as her appearance.
I watched her for a moment, noting how she shifted slightly, a sign of unease. "What's your name?" I asked gently.
After watching me for a moment, she looked up at me through her lashes. "Greer."
A warm smile came to my lips as I nodded. "Greer." I repeated. "That's a beautiful name."
Her cheeks reddened slightly as she attempted to hide behind her large blonde curls.
"I'm Avery." I greeted, sticking out my hand for her to take. "It's nice to meet you, Greer."
Slowly, Greer placed her little hand into my own. I gave it a light shake, and a smile made its way across her cheek.
"What do you say we get you back to your parents?" I suggested, her little hand still in my own. "They must be worried."
Her gripped tightened on me, and she moved toward me so she was right up against my leg. "Okay." she whispered, holding on tightly.
I smiled down at her, my heart clenching slightly at the sight of the little girl holding onto me. I'd be lying if I said I never put thought into having children, but lately it had been the furthest thing on my mind.
Hopefully, this planet would give Bellamy and I the chance to start the family we'd always wanted.
---
By the time Greer and I reached the main part of Sanctum, she was held in my arms. Two minutes into our walk, she had complained that she was tired, so the rest of the trek consisted of me carrying her.
As we entered the main courtyard, I was met with the scene of people still milling around in excitement.
Greer clutched onto me, refusing for me to put her down as we walked toward the palace. Her parents had to be around here somewhere...
I searched for people who didn't look like they were having a good time, people who looked stressed or nervous. If my child was missing, I wouldn't be enjoying a party, that's for sure.
"GREER!"
I turned toward the voice, my eyes landing on a man who was rushing toward us. His appearance was a clear enough indicator that this was Greer's father.
He was grabbing onto her the minute he reached us, letting out small whispers to his daughter as he clutched onto her. "You scared me." he declared, looking at the little girl in his arms.
It was only then that he acknowledged my presence. I felt myself stiffen under his gaze, afraid I was about to be blame for something I didn't do.
"I found her in the fields." I quickly explained. "She must have followed me out there."
Instead of berating me, the man let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you!" he breathed, quickly pulling me into a one armed hug, Greer in his other.
I let out a small gasp of surprise as he clutched onto me. I was instantly uncomfortable with the physical contact, but decided to look past it.
A forced smile spread across my face as he finally released me. Setting Greer down, he maintained a grip on her hand. "She has a tendency to wander." he explained.
"I can tell." This time a genuine smile came to my lips as I looked down at Greer. "Curious little one, aren't you?"
Greer let out a small giggle as she leaned against her father's leg.
"I'm David." her father introduced, sticking out his free hand for me to shake. "And I'm assuming you and Greer have already had your introductions."
A quiet laugh flew from my lips as I nodded. "We did." I confirmed. "I'm Avery. Nice to meet you David."
He dropped my hand, just as a gentle breeze passed through Sanctum, causing my hair to blow wildly. I brought my left hand up, brushing the hair from my face.
"Married?" David questioned.
"I'm sorry?" I wondered, unsure of where he was planning on going with this.
David nodded to my left hand. "The ring."
"Oh." I muttered, letting out an uncomfortable laugh. "Not officially, but might as well be."
He smile as he looked down at Greer for a moment. "You have kids of your own?"
"Not yet." I answered, grinning down at Greer. "One day."
David smiled as he looked back to me. "What do you think of the celebration?" he wondered, changing the topic once again.
I glanced around, forcing a look of awe onto my face. "It's nice." I answered, my tone giving way my uncertainty with the whole thing. "Nothing I'm used to."
He nodded. "Well, we sure do know how to throw a party." he looked toward the tavern. "I should treat you to lunch, it's the least I can do to thank you."
"Oh, no, really it's okay." I assured. "I'm supposed to meet my fiancé."
Nodding, David glanced down at Greer. "Well, don't be a stranger. Greer loves meeting new people."
I smiled at the little girl. "I won't." I assured. "I'm sure you know where to find me."
"Thank you again, Avery. And welcome to Sanctum."
"I'll see you around." I said, giving David a small smile before crouching down in front of Greer. "Bye, Greer. I'll see you later, alright?"
She nodded, an excited smile coming to her lips as she gave me a small wave.
As I turned away from the two of them, I couldn't help but feel that there was something more that I was missing.
-an-
sorry this chapter was so long!! but i hope you all enjoyed
please comment your thoughts, I love hearing what you guys think!
love you all!
-maddy xoxo