The smell of pancakes and fried food fills the air making my stomach rumble louder than I feel it ever has before, I'm surprised people in New Zealand haven't mistaken it for an earthquake.
We'd decided to come to Rubys for breakfast before the away game tonight which I know the boys are nervous about, it's been rumoured around the locker room that scouts are going to be at the game, we know it's a big deal for them. Especially Blaze, I know he wants to go to Alabama, he still hasn't heard anything, but coach told him he'd be fighting colleges off and I don't doubt he will- he's one of the best players in Atlanta, possibly even America, with the best stats. The boys have yet to lose a game and with states and nationals looming the pressure's on.
You wouldn't be able to tell from the outside though, Blaze is sat in his letterman scoffing down pancakes asserting that natural dominant vibe around the table like it's a normal day. His blue eyes twinkle with confidence, smirking at something Rutherford's just said but I can tell he's nervous. It's the little things he does like constantly shoving his hands back through his jet black hair and twiddling with his rings, he's persistently wiping his thumb across his bottom lip too which would be sexy if I didn't know it was because he was nervous.
"Should you guys actually be eating this stuff before the game?" Emily asks snapping pictures of our food, she's already been to get the photos she took of us yesterday at the rink processed and had handed them to us today as an early Christmas present. My favourite one was a snap she'd managed to take of me and Blaze collapsed on the floor, my head on his chest, both of us in fits of laughter.
"Yeah, this shit is technically just carbs and protein... it's not like we don't burn it off anyway." Brady says shovelling another greasy sausage in his mouth.
"Yeah but you've eaten like three whole portions... and Blaze is on his second stack of pancakes!" Vixxie takes a swig of her orange juice jabbing at Blazes' plate which is smothered in cream and syrup, the odd slice of strawberry on the outskirts of the porcelain. He's throwing them down his throat like someones going to take them away from him. Whilst he's not looking I try and pinch a strawberry off the top of his remaining stack. I manage to grab it but he catches me when it's halfway to my mouth. I throw it in and chew quickly with a sheepish grin.
"Hey!" He frowns, in response, I just stick out my tongue, "Careful or I'll put some cream on that." He jabs his fork towards my tongue with a sexy smirk making me retract my tongue in a flushed fluster. I gulp the strawberry down with blotchy cheeks. He chuckles lowly, shaking his head and directs his attention back to his pancakes.
After we've cleared most of our plates and I've stacked them on the end of our table Carrie pulls out a present wrapped box gesturing for us all to bring our gifts out too. We'd decided instead of buying seven presents each that we'd pull names out of a hat and get one person one thing- like secret Santa but... it wasn't really secret when Brady told us who he got.
I'd pulled Vixxies name and spent so long deliberating over what to get her but just as I thought all hope was lost... I'd found the perfect gift... at least I hope it is. I know for a fact this is one of her favourite things and I'd spent hours, days even surfing the internet to find the right thing. I just hope she actually likes it. My nails are already short enough, my biting habit is breaking them down to the nail bed but this present is making them non-excistant.
I place a medium square sized wrapped present on the table, balancing it half on the ledge and half on my lap since it's too big to fit in my section of the table.
"For me?" Vixxie giggles looking at the pink bow I'd added on top of the polar bear wrapping paper, probably the least Vixxie kind of gift wrap but I thought it was cute.
"Maybe..." I grin handing her the gift, everyone's eyes on the square shape travelling over them. I watch carefully my heart in the throat as she tears back the paper. I pray to god I've got this right.
"Oh... my... Atlas..." She whispers, her eyes darting across the canvas. I'd gotten her one of Alexandra Gallagher's original paintings. She's one of Vixxies favourite artists and she's gushed about her on more than ten occasions, she adores her work and uses inspiration from it to put into her own incredible artwork. Vixxie often talks about Alexandra Gallagher's passion and unique pieces alongside her fire to fight for equality in the creative world. From her website, Gallagher's work 'looks beyond our subjective limits and often tells a story of inner imagination and thought' and Vixxie loves to tell us that.
"Is it alright? Have I got it wrong? Oh gosh, I'm sorry-" Oh god she hates it, her face looks so disappointed, everyone's going to think I'm the worst friend in the world. My pulse quickens leaving my palms clammy.
"Shut up!" Vixxie laughs across the table, I stare at her stunned. Is it that bad she's laughing at it? "Come here!" She gets up and holds her arms out across the table and pulls me into a hug. It's a rather stretched and uncomfortable one but it puts my heart at ease slightly. That means she doesn't hate it right...?
We finally pull apart, Vixxies eyes are bright, her cheeks rosy and her smile gleefully wide.
"I can't believe you've done this... it's a fucking original too!" I plop back down next to Blaze and shrug feeling my cheeks heat up, she likes it! The relief sweeps through me and I feel a lot happier, content.
"What is it?" Brady inspects it under the bright lights hanging from the ceiling. Vixxe is quick to snatch it out of his hands and give it a once over for his greasy fingerprints or marks he left. She scowls at him and tuts in anguish at his lack of appreciation for her favourite artist.
"It's an original piece by Alexandra Gallagher. She's one of my favourite artists and... I really have no idea how you got this... it's incredible... I have no words. Thank you so much, Atlas." She runs her hands down the edge of the painting looking genuinely shocked.
'VJ... speechless... never!" Rutherford gasps clutching his chest. Vixxie doesn't even try and bite back, her eyes stay focused on the painting prized between her black nailed hands.
"I know... that's how amazing this is. Atty's rendered me speechless." She mumbles making us all laugh. A warm fuzzy feeling settles in my chest once everyone else starts exchanging their gifts. Christmas has never been this warm, this exciting and full of love.
Even before I was adopted, my momma did her best to make Christmas special and full of love, which she did, but someone always had to pay the price for it with my dad. It wasn't Christmas in Illinois without an annual festive beating. My heart clenches at the memories.
"She doesn't need another fucking scrap of material to prance about in!" My dad screams in my moms face after ripping my new leotard from my hands, "We don't need all this food! We don't need the presents and we don't need to celebrate Christmas!" He shouts mockingly at her, her face contorting in pain as he yanks further on her hair. He's just come back from the bar, I'm not sure why but he hates Christmas- he never celebrates it- just goes out to the bar that opens the earliest.
He throws her down onto the couch and moves onto me, yanking my arm from behind my back which holds the present I'd made for my mom. He rips it from my hands and starts jumping on it, my sister howls in the background clutching to a new barbie momma had given her.
The memory curses through my body making me shiver, after I was adopted my parents obviously didn't celebrate either after their daughter passed. Sometimes they go away or they just drink themselves stupid, unconscious by lunchtime. I'm not sure what they're doing this year- they haven't left yet so maybe they're staying home. That's probably the scariest thought.
A nudge in my arm makes me realise I've been picking my fingers for the last few moments, the red skin pulses around my nails.
"You alright Blondie?" Blaze is looking down at me, only then do I see he's got his incredibly toned arm behind me on the top of the booth, I lean back the top of my head just touching his arm. I let out a breath and I can see his lips turn up slightly, I feel safer and immediately happier in this position.
"Yeah of course." I send him a small smile and I feel his hand land gently on my furthest shoulder, just slightly bringing me closer towards him. I don't protest, just focus on Emily giving Brady his present to stop my cheeks heating. I watch Brady jump up from the booth holding the box set of all the Avengers films. He bounces up and down waving the discs in the air. Emily mentions something about them being a collecters edition or something then goes on to say,
"I don't get the obsession with all that Marvel crap." Vixxie and Carrie nod in agreement and the boys face cloud over, Brady bangs his hand against the table making me jump.
"Help me out Big A. These idiots don't know what they're talking about!" Brady stares at Emily a permanent death stare etched into his face. B and I had found out we both had a bad obsession with the Avenger's films when he, Blaze and I spent a week of lunches holed up in the library watching them in order. Well, I was supposed to be working but these two are very persuasive when it comes to Marvel.
"Ignore them B, I'll watch them with you." I giggle, I frigging love those films. We get into a very heated debate about which Avenger is the best before Carrie scowls at the table, she looks like she's assessing us then eventually says,
"Hold on... Atlas is the only one who hasn't gotten anything!" I'd been so concentrated on everyone else and their presents I'd actually forgot. I don't care, as cringy as it sounds having friends like these and making memories like these is enough of a present for me.
"Ah yeah... Merry Christmas Blondie." Blaze pulls away from me slightly so he can retrieve a small flattish box from his pocket. The pink pale box is dressed with a small silk bow that sits perfectly in the centre.
I take the box carefully from his hand, Blaze runs his thumb across his bottom lip, looking anywhere but at my eyes. I pull on the bow watching it unravel delicately and lift the lid of the box. A layer of tissue paper sits across the partition, placing the top of the box under I remove the crunchy paper to a small note, written in beautiful cursive.
To: Butterfly
Fly
From: Blaze x
My heart squeezes and a surge of something foreign rushes through my bloodstream, running my fingers over the writing I flip it over and underneath lies a tiny silver ballerina on the end of a thin chain. The silver pendant is one of the most gorgeous things I've ever seen and it immediately reminds me of my momma, she had one just like it. Before I was taken I tried to find it amongst her things but I couldn't and now this in my hands looks exactly the same. I run my fingers across the cool necklace, feeling all the ridges and indents. I can feel the tears building in my eyes... this is one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen.
"I- I- it's beautiful... thank you so much Blaze." Without thinking I throw my arms around his neck. He tenses beneath me but quickly wraps his arms around my waist pulling me closer towards him. I bury my head in the crook of his neck surrounded by his minty scent.
"Do you like it?" I feel the vibrations of his deep voice on the top of my head.
"I love it. It's one of the best things I've ever been given. Thank you so much!" I murmur against his jacket-clad shoulder.
Neither of us lets go, I close my eyes feeling peaceful in his arms. The hustle and bustle of the dinner is drowned out by my heartbeat, thumping slow and steady against my ribcage. I feel like I should stop this, pull away but it feels too good, it feels weirdly right.
COUGH COUGH.
A sputtering cough has my eyes flinging open, the serenity ebbing away as Blaze tenses again. We pull apart quickly letting my hair drop in front of my eyes, a ferocious red concealing most of my cheeks. I can see most of them grinning out of the corner of my eye but I don't dare lookup.
"I think we should get going. I'm not sitting at the front of the fucking coach again." Blaze says gruffly beside me obviously choosing to ignore whatever that was.
Everyone starts to pile out of the booth heading towards their individual cars, wrapping their coats tighter around them as we exit the warmth from the big grills into the harsh winter weather. We all say our brief goodbyes watching Carrie and Ethan clamber into Vixxies Range Rover and Emily mount the back of Rutherford's bike. Brady's striding ahead of me and Blaze to reach his Black mustang that's parked pridefully in one of the marked bays. I follow him but realise Blaze is still stood by the edge of the diner looking sceptically around the corner. He looks slightly spooked but also angry, his gaze is fixated on the corner of the dinner where a small alleyway leads to the multi waste bins, a few black and silver cars are parked in the bays next to it but nothing suspicious.
"Are you alright?" I ask him, walking back to where his feet are still planted.
"Yeah fine..." He snaps still looking off at the corner of the diner. He still looks spooked but has his hand on my lower back leading me towards his car. I stare back at where he's looking but decided not to push it... maybe he saw a stray cat or something?
After we'd boarded the coach to the away game I'd sat next to Blaze across from Brady and Vixxie, the others occupying the row behind us. We're purposely scrambled to the back first so we wouldn't have to deal with Scrowtski and his buddies who are now pissed they're sat down the front under coaches watchful eye. After the register had been taken and coach had voiced his strict travel rules that include-
'Don't ask me how long we've got yet.'
'Don't bother me if you get coach sick.' And
'You guys better behave or you can kiss your spot on this team goodbye'
We were on our way, a bus full of rowdy football players and excitable cheerleaders hurtling down the highway. I'd given Blaze one of my earphones and he'd reluctantly put it into his ear frowning at me like I might poison him with my music but, if he's bored right now you wouldn't be able to tell. He just keeps laughing at my awful lipsyncing and seated dancing.
"Are you looking forward to Christmas?" I ask as Santa Tell Me by Ariana Grande comes to an end. He shrugs non-comintenly and looks out of the window at the fields we're travelling past.
"I guess."
"Are you doing anything?" I scroll further down my playlist to find some more Ariana Grande.
"I'm going to New York to see my Nana. She came here for Thanksgiving so we go back there for winter vacation." He mumbles playing with the rings on his fingers, he'll have to remove them in a few hours to play.
I feel kind of upset. I didn't realise he wouldn't be here over Christmas break, I don't like thinking he'll be so far away not when I'm used to seeing him nearly every day now and we text and Snapchat constantly... it's become part of my routine.
"You don't sound overly excited." I push away everything else and focus on his negative tone.
"I'm not." He grunts gazing out of the window again, " I love seeing my Nana and Gramps but I hate New York. I hate going back."
"But it's Christmas in New York! That magical!" I say, my momma grew up in New York and used to tell me tones of stories about Christmas time in New York. The broadway shows, the Rockefeller Tree, central park. She promised us every year she'd take us one day.
"Not my New York Christmas. It's not like the fucking films. My old life is back there and I hate even chancing to spend time in the same realms of it." He scoffs.
"Maybe it'll be different this year?" I say hopefully, I'd give anything to have a family-oriented Christmas. I know Blaze had a hard time back in New York but Christmas is for family and having fun in the present right?
"It won't be! You don't understand. Look I don't want to talk about it okay? Just drop it." He huffs and I stay silent hearing the distant pain in his voice, I don't want to upset him, but I don't want him to have a bad Christmas. I turn up the volume on my music, the rest of the journey is spent in silence. I feel bad now for pushing it, I wouldn't want to go back to Illinois to play happy families either. Blaze doesn't open up easily but recently I've been peeling back his layers, I just hope he knows I'm here for him. My fingers fiddle with the ballerina now laying on my chest and I smile slightly- he knows I'm here for him.
Hey guys! Sorry the updates late, I've been a bit slack with writing recently. I've got a lot going on at school and my work load is a bit stressful so bear with! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and have had a good week! If you did please please please hit the star ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️