Welcome back to The Water Alchemist. I don't own any of the intellectual property of Fullmetal Alchemist.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
What Lies Ahead
TW: There is a depiction of an anxiety attack brought on by PTSD. Reader discretion is advised.
***
"Well?" Lust asked the approaching soldier, tapping her foot impatiently.
She was irritated, to put it mildly. Envy had screwed things to hell, and now she had to figure out how to undo his mess before Father caught wind of it. The soldier transformed back into the familiar figure her fury was directed at as he held out a piece of paper to her.
"I was able to locate a witness who saw the man that orchestrated the breakout. Here, this is a rough sketch of the guy," Envy said, handing over the scrap of paper which Lust examined.
"Oh, he's still alive then?" she asked with a laugh, recognizing number sixty-six. She furrowed her brow, looking up to Envy. "Is there any direct connection with the Colonel?"
"Who knows? My money says he's the one behind it, though," Envy said through a stretch.
It would make sense that the Colonel had been the puppeteer of this little operation, especially after the stunt he and that girl pulled over Envy. Imagine Lust's surprise when Envy came back shivering and empty-handed. She eyed him from the corner of her peripheral.
"Where did he run off to?" she asked, referring to number sixty-six.
It didn't bode well for them if he was on the Colonel's side. He knew too much. Envy seemed to bend out of shape at the inquiry.
"Well, he did leave pretty suddenly, and he's good at hiding," he stuttered, seeming utterly unsure of himself.
"In other words, you have no idea. You're useless," Lust bit out. "Not only do you not have any useful information on the breakout, but you couldn't even manage to bring one little girl to Father. Pathetic."
"Don't blame this on me, you old hag. You know as well as I do that if Pride were here, this would have been more manageable," Envy shot back. "He and Wrath sure picked a convenient time to skip town."
He grumbled to himself irritably, and Lust rolled her eyes. How many times would it take for him to understand?
"You know they have to keep appearances," she sighed, rubbing her temples. "I could let the breakout slide, but how difficult is it to secure a girl?"
She had done it quite easily. Maybe that was the issue; she hadn't been the one to retrieve her in the first place.
"Well, I'd like to see you bring her in without wanting to kill her," he muttered. "Damn brat, freezing me like that... She'll pay for that. Her and that damn Colonel. Two against one isn't very fair, don't you agree?" She ignored his useless question.
"Have you at least managed to find out where she and that troublesome man we were looking after escaped to?" she asked. Envy didn't meet her gaze, pressing his index fingers together guiltily. Lust groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Such incompetence."
"Look, they were quick on the uptake. I know where the Colonel is, at least. He's back at his post like nothing happened," Envy griped. "As if he didn't burn me to a crisp."
"How bold," she mused, stroking her chin. Their plan to subdue him hadn't gone accordingly, but maybe now he'd behave himself, though she had her doubts. He didn't seem the type. Something occurred to her. "What of that nurse?" Envy grinned slyly.
"Taken care of," he said. At least he had managed that much, she thought. "So, what now, Lusty?" She thought for a moment.
"Well, that man's as good as dead after taking those drugs, so I suppose finding him now would be of little consequence. Even if he survives the withdrawal, he won't remember what he uncovered. As for the girl, we need to find her before Father finds out about this blunder of yours." Before she goes and runs her mouth unnecessarily, Lust thought, biting at the tip of her thumbnail.
"Easy for you to say," he countered, crossing his arms defensively. "I don't know how to track her down. She may as well have dissolved into thin air. If you hadn't noticed, it's just me looking. I'm short on manpower."
"Manpower?" she asked, turning to one of the cages behind her. A voice rang out in a monstrous growl, rattling the steel cage with extreme force, and suddenly, she had a devilish idea. She turned to the cage, the heel of her shoe clacking against the floor with conviction. "But you've got plenty of manpower right here. Looks like you're finally on, Barry the Chopper. Let's see how good you are at tracking."
***
We eventually made it to the ruins, and when we approached, Fu greeted us from the top of a piece of rubble.
"I've been waiting," he announced, jumping down as we each dismounted. We exchanged pleasantries, but Ed's greeting wasn't so pleasant.
"Water!" Ed exclaimed angrily. "I'm burning up after crossing that godforsaken desert, and I need water!"
Fu seemed taken aback by Ed's outburst, but he led us and our horses to a small spring a little further into the ruins without further delay. I nudged Ed for his child-like outburst, but he just grumbled. When Ed laid his eyes on the spring, I thought he'd burst into happy tears.
"There, water," Fu said dryly, motioning to the spring.
Ed wasted no time removing his cloak and gloves, throwing them haphazardly to the ground as he ran into the spring, doing an awkward mix between a front-flip and a dive. I couldn't help but laugh as he splashed into it. I collected the cloak and gloves he had forsaken, and after dusting them off, I rested them over our horse, which I led to the spring to drink. His head bobbed up as I took my own cloak off, and he spoke through the film of water.
"My automail almost seared through my skin," he complained as I took a seat at the edge of the spring, patting our horse's head. I wrinkled an eyebrow at him. "Well, I couldn't ask for your help again after you nearly bit the dust."
"Fair," I grumbled, my hand resting on the warmed stone.
I investigated the pool as Ed bobbed nearby, wondering just how cool it could possibly be with the sun beating down from overhead. I reached out to touch it to see for myself, but I saw my reflection in it, and something inside of me felt suddenly unnerved. A moment of déjà vu, almost. I scooted further from the water. Fu turned and looked at us.
"Whose idea was it to bring the kids?" he asked as if we weren't there. I glared at him, and he turned to Breda.
"It was a direct order," Breda explained. They chatted amongst themselves, and Ed waded over to me, crossing his arms over the edge.
"You don't wanna get in?" he asked, water trailing from him and onto the ledge.
I looked at the spring again. It probably wasn't deep, especially if my unit of measurement was Edward Elric. It would probably be okay.
"I'm good," I assured him, shaking my head. He rested his cheek on his arm.
"Oh, come on, it feels great," he said, dipping his automail into the pool to scoop up a handful of water, splashing me. It was surprisingly chilly, and I shivered a bit.
"Hey!" I exclaimed with a laugh, lifting a bit of water, and I splashed him back.
He grinned devilishly, scooting back and this time he used both hands to splash me. I looked down at my now wet lap, my clothes soaked. I narrowed my eyes and clapped my hands, touching them to the spring water. I sent a surge of water over him that he certainly wasn't expecting. He blinked a few times after it had passed over him, and I burst into laughter, clutching at my stomach, trying to contain myself. He stood upright and trudged through the water to me, trying to seem menacing as he approached, though it only made me laugh harder.
"Oh, real funny, haha," he said, his hands resting on his hips. I still laughed. "Well, see how you like this!" He caught me around the waist too quickly for me to register, and I cried out as he lifted me.
"Ed, wait—"
I yelled, too late, my back hitting the water roughly. The playfulness of the interaction quickly dissolved into the spring. The water caved in over me as I was held there, unable to breathe. I chanced to open my eyes for a moment and a figure loomed over me, just as it had once before. I could taste the fear on my tongue as I exhaled, bubbles of air escaping my lungs. I desperately flailed around, feeling myself slipping into a panic— memories of Elias and my nightmares swimming around in the water with me. I realized abruptly that the arm at my waist was gone. I shoved my hands against the floor of the spring and propelled myself up with all my might. I broke to the surface fairly quickly, and I was grateful for its shallowness as I gasped for air. I looked around frantically – for what, I wasn't sure – but my eyes eventually landed over to Ed, who fought to speak through a laughing fit.
"Man, you should have seen your face! You were so surprised," Ed snickered. He wadded over, and I turned, feeling off. I knew I was safe, but it was like my body hadn't had the same realization I did. There was a tightness in my chest like someone had pierced their hand through me and took hold of my very heart. He hovered over me, and I turned further away, unable to move my legs out from under me. I didn't want him to see me, not like this. His laugh sputtered out as he knelt in front of me, turning me to face him by my shoulder. "Wait... are you crying?"
He reached out to touch my face, but I flinched back. He retracted his hand, looking a little hurt, as I wiped the sudden onslaught of tears and spring water away.
"I-I'm fine," I stuttered, trying to relax, trying to make my words truth.
I knew I wasn't in danger. I knew Elias was nowhere near here. I knew I wasn't in any danger. Yet my breathing only worsened as more tears cascaded down my face, and I felt as though I couldn't take a full breath. I clawed at my shirt, trying to see if that's what was constricting my breathing. I heard Ed call for me distantly, and I was momentarily away from the sensations that trapped me in my body.
"Marina, hey, look at me," he said. I looked up at him and into his golden eyes, thankful for their steady tranquility, but I noticed a strained uneasiness in his gaze. He reached his hand to my face again, a little hesitantly, as if I were a wild animal, and he was trying not to spook me. I didn't flinch as his fingertips brushed up against my cheek lightly, and he wiped away the streak of tears with his thumb, resting his palm against the side of my face. I seized up suddenly, a rush of tears flooding from me uncontrollably, and sobs soon wracked my body. He moved slowly still as I crumpled, and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his orbit. "I'm sorry, Marina— damnit, I'm sorry." His words muffled as he nestled his chin in my hair.
"Is everything alright?" Major Armstrong called over to us. Ed pulled me closer into his chest.
"Yeah, just give us a minute," he answered, giving the Major a look over his shoulder. I could see as he nodded and returned his attention to the group. I let myself melt into Ed, listening to his heartbeat steady as mine tried to follow in its rhythm. I was eventually able to take a deep breath, my lungs filling with the sweet relief. Even when I was beginning to feel myself again, he didn't let go. He just held me until I had stopped crying, stopped shaking, without an ounce of selfishness to it. It was a generosity I'd never imagined possible before, a warmth that put the heat of this blazing desert to shame. It was like I was as close as I could be to the sun without burning up. Ed pulled away eventually, staring down at me. He spoke quietly, the conversation just for us. "I didn't mean to startle you."
"I know," I managed, finally getting rid of the tightness in my chest.
"Are you hurt?"
"No," I said, shaking my head. He seemed a little unconvinced.
"I'll help you out," he said, standing. He pulled me from the water, and I stood on wobbly legs as he guided me to the edge furthest from the group. It wasn't long until I was safely on the sandy ground with my back against the spring, dripping into the grains beneath me. Ed sat down next to me as I hugged my knees to my chest, and we were quiet. He shuffled a bit, squeezing the excess water from his tank top, and I watched him from the corner of my eye. When he finished, he looked over at me. "I'll give you some space."
He stood, and I felt myself begin to panic all over again. I needed his warmth a little longer. I caught the back of his pants leg, and he looked at me quizzically.
"Please, don't go," I whispered.
I looked at him hopefully as I released him. He seemed to consider my request before rejoining me back on the sand. I let my hand run through my damp hair, occasionally squeezing out streams of water. I fiddled around with it as another lifetime of silence passed between us.
"Marina, I'm—"
"It wasn't your fault," I assured him, cutting him off. I didn't look at his face, but I could almost picture his expression. I didn't want to see the guilt in his eyes like before. "I had an... unfortunate experience with water, kind of recently. I didn't realize I was that afraid of it happening again." He let my words linger in the stale and dry air for a moment.
"What happened?" he asked, his voice low but mild. I looked over to him, his gaze cast to the endless sand and rubble that stretched out in front of us. That was the look I didn't want to see. "You don't have to tell me if it's too uncomfortable."
I bit my lips together, chewing on them to make what I was going to say easier. I needed him to know that he wasn't the issue.
"No, I'll tell you," I said.
So, I told him. Not everything— but I did explain how Elias had taken me that day. I told him about the fountain. I told him how Elias had reminded me of and expected me to know my father and how he decided to let me go with the journal when I didn't. I conveniently left out the bit about my memories and the whole being from the other side of the gate thing. I decided not to get into it further than that, at least not here. When I finished, I looked nervously to Ed, whose face contorted with anger.
"That bastard..." he trailed off, his jaw tightening. He slammed his fist into the sand, leaning forward. "That bastard!"
I touched his arm, just barely, and he looked at me, a fire blazing in his eyes.
"It's alright. Like I said before, we don't have to worry about him anymore," I promised Ed softly.
"Yeah, but he hurt you," he said, clenching his fists. He inhaled through his nose and let the breath out harshly, running his hands through his bangs, his palm resting against his forehead. I couldn't see his face clearly as he spoke. "And now, I've hurt you." I frowned.
"You didn't hurt me, Ed. That wasn't your intention. We were messing around," I said, trying to look him in the eyes. He didn't move, wouldn't meet my gaze, so I grabbed his hand from his face and brought it to mine, resting it against my cheek. He looked at me suddenly, surprise written all over his countenance. I managed a small smile, trying to seem reassuring. "I promise you didn't hurt me. I'm perfectly fine, see?" He looked down into the sand.
"I'll be more careful next time."
"There's no way you could have known, so I'm partially to blame. I'm sorry for not telling you earlier," I said, releasing his hand.
Without mine to hold him there, he could have let go, but he didn't. His hand lingered there at my cheek, soft and warm and comforting. I leaned into it, closing my eyes.
"I know you had your reasons," he said. "I'm sorry I reminded you of it."
"I'm not," I said, the words jumping to the tip of my tongue before I had processed them. I felt his hand slip, and I opened my eyes as he retracted it. He had a strange look on his face, and I chuckled. "I just mean that I'm grateful that if it had to happen, it was with you. It was scary, but I felt better knowing you were there."
The words surprised even me a bit, but I knew it was true as I spoke. If I had fallen into that lake I went to with Nico in Dublith, I doubted he'd have handled the situation very well, nor would I have. I doubted that I'd feel as safe as I did with Ed. Ed looked away quietly, and I realized I had said something he'd probably find a touch weird. I cleared my throat and worked on squeezing the water from my pant legs.
"Are you still scared?" he asked suddenly.
I looked over to him and noticed his automail flexed in a pointed position, his chin resting in his other hand, focused somewhere far off. I looked at my palm and held it out as he glanced at me.
"Are you?" I asked. He traced a circle in my extended hand wordlessly, and I shuddered from his touch. It was much different than the last time. His automail was warm to the touch, and the circle burned in my palm long after his fingers retracted. I did the same for him, and together, we swallowed our fears. I leaned my back against the spring, the stones warm on my back and I sighed, shutting my eyes. "At least the water cooled me off." Ed snorted.
"Pfft, that's your takeaway?" he asked incredulously.
"Well, that and the fact that I probably look crazy," I said, twirling a damp strand of hair that fell into my face around my finger.
"Not at all," he said absently, and I dropped the strand turning to him. He had a goofy look on his face that I hadn't seen before. "You look..." I watched him intently as he trailed off.
What? I look what? I thought fervently to myself, wanting him to finish his sentence. He didn't get the opportunity.
"You lovebirds finished over there? We need to get moving," Breda called, and I let out a mix between a gasp and a laugh. I covered my mouth as I chanced a look at Ed, who moved to stand.
"Shut up, Breda!" he exclaimed suddenly as he stood over me. He sighed and held out his hand. "We good?" I chuckled, taking his hand and I stood with him.
"We're good," I confirmed.
He nodded with a half-smile that made him look a little dopey, but I found it endearing. We rejoined the group, still a little wet but a lot surer of ourselves.
***
"So, this is Xerces, huh?" Ed said. I glanced around at the ruins, taking them in. The city was great and vast — you could tell that much far out into the desert — but up close, it seemed incredibly intricate. The way the pillars were carved, the structures that still held after years and years of aging, the spectacle of it all was simply fascinating. I touched my hand to an intricately crafted slab of stone that had fallen from a structure above it and let my hand follow the work that existed well before I ever did. It was really such a loss. "Looks just like the fable described it." Fu looked at Ed, surprised.
"Did you say a fable?" he asked.
Ed nodded and went into detail of the story of the Eastern Sage, the bringer of alchemy to Amestris. Fu exchanged his own story like that of Ed's, about a drifter from the West. He explained that this Western sage was credited to have brought Alkahestry to Xing, or at least, had given them the means to begin its practice. They continued their conversation after we re-cloaked ourselves, and we began walking deeper into the ruins, though I stopped paying attention after a while. I was filled with wonder, staring around at my surroundings, trying to piece together which broken stones in the sand had once fit together as a pillar of the lost civilization. I was so lost in my rebuilding; I didn't notice Ed lagging.
"Hey, Marina," he called. I looked around for him before I saw him far behind me, staring off at something. I walked back to him, and I followed his gaze. High above the ruins was a mural that looked almost like a transmutation circle, but it was broken off at the top, leaving it incomplete. It was more intricate than any circle I had ever laid my eyes on, containing a plethora of symbols and writings beyond my comprehension. "Did you happen to see something similar in the fifth lab?" I shook my head.
"I don't remember anything after Envy knocked me out," I noted, though I did recognize it from the show. For the life of me, I couldn't remember its exact significance.
"Oh, right," Ed mumbled.
"What are you two gawking at? Come on!" Fu called back to us. Ed and I looked at one another, then ran to catch up.
"We're going in pretty deep now," Ed said after a bit of walking.
The Major hummed in agreement, looking around. We were a bit alarmed as a voice rang out above us.
"Edward! Marina!" it called, drawing our eye to the top of some rubble.
She was concealed in the shadows, but I knew that voice anywhere. I smiled widely as Ross emerged unscathed from the shadows.
"That damn Colonel!" Ed said with an incredulous laugh, his face cracking in two at the sight of her. She scaled down the rubble in a flash, and the Major was on her.
"Lieutenant Ross! Thank the heavens!" the Major belted as he leaped at her, though she adeptly dodged his hug. He chased her around in circles, crying tears of joy. "My heart's been congested with grief!"
Ross somehow managed to fend off the blubbering Major, trying to console him all the while from a safe distance. I chuckled watching the exchange.
"There really wasn't any place in Amestris where we could safely hide a dead girl, especially one that's still alive, you know?" Breda said.
"So, the Colonel knew Lieutenant Ross was innocent all along?" Ed asked. Breda grinned.
"We had a feeling as soon as it came out in the papers. But the Colonel was the one who put the whole thing together," Breda said. Ed looked at me.
"Does that mean when he took you...?" he trailed off tentatively.
"That I was involved? Yeah, though I wasn't exactly filled in before I was a part of it," I smiled. I looked to Breda, asking for permission to go on, and he gave me a thumbs up. "You should know, though— Ross isn't the only one still alive. Hughes made it, Ed. He's alive."
I couldn't help the smile that spread wide across my face. It felt so good to say that out loud. Ed's eyes enlarged, and for a moment, I thought he may just keel over. What I wouldn't give for the beauty of a modern smartphone to capture the stunned look.
"No way, I thought... I was sure..."
"Maybe we should sit and discuss," Breda said, clapping Ed on the back.
Ed nodded numbly as we rounded up the group and sat on some bits of rubble from the ruins as Breda explained what happened. He explained the breakout, as well as Barry and Ling's involvement, and how Mustang had managed to fake Ross's death.
"After Madam Ross was prematurely freed, the young lord made a deal with Barry the Chopper. The orders I've been given are to personally escort this woman to the East to take refuge," Fu explained further.
"So, we all agreed to rendezvous here in one big effort to aid the Lieutenants escape," Breda said.
"I see," the Major said with a nod. Ed gave Breda a look.
"You gotta be joking. I can't believe the Colonel was able to pull one over on us like this," he snorted.
"He knew it'd be easier to convince you if you actually saw Lieutenant Ross, and Marina, too," Breda explained. Ed chuckled and held his arms up in surrender.
"Fine, I'll admit it, alright? He actually knew what he was doing this time."
"Though, I'm sure she would have more details of what happened when the Colonel placed her under 'arrest' than I would," Breda said, directing his gaze to me.
I gulped as all their eyes fell on me, and I cleared my throat.
"Well, when I was missing a while back, I had run into Hughes, who was being targeted by the Homunculi we met in the fifth lab," I said. Ed's face twisted at the memory. "I managed to stop them from killing him, and they took us both as hostages. They agreed to release me if I promised to keep quiet about the ordeal. They threatened to kill him if I didn't cooperate. They wanted me to behave myself."
"That's why you couldn't tell me what happened," Ed pieced together quietly. "You carried that burden for weeks." I nodded solemnly.
"I managed to not say anything to you guys, but Mustang was able to tie me back to the scene, and he tried to get it out of me when we spoke in his office."
"I should have known that bastard was up to something," Ed grumbled.
"When I didn't say anything, he let me go but promised to throw me in jail if it turned out I was involved. Then the paper announced Hughes' death, and I panicked," I said, twirling my thumbs. "Mustang kept his word and arrested me shortly after 'murdering' Ross. But instead of booking me, we set out to rescue Hughes. We ran into some trouble, but we found him, and he's alive."
When I finished, the crowd around us looked more than relieved. I felt lighter, having been able to say something I had held onto for so long. I hadn't realized how much it had weighed me down until then.
"So, what has become of the General? Should he not also be sent away, being named dead publicly?" the Major asked.
"We sent him close to some relatives and our old stomping grounds in East City to keep an eye on him. We may move him further out someday, but we didn't think it would be good to move him too far in his current condition," Breda supplemented. I took a deep, preparatory breath, awaiting the inevitable question.
"Condition?" Ed asked.
The heaviness fell back to my shoulders almost immediately. Breda and I exchanged a look, almost as if to decide who would bear the burden of delivering the news. Breda sighed and relented to my sad eyes.
"His captors had been using experimental drugs on him. He— lost parts of his memory," Breda said quietly.
A gust of wind blew past my ears, the only thing I could hear in the silence that held a tense grip over us. No one moved, no one spoke; we just sat with that uncomfortable truth.
"That is most unfortunate," the Major eventually got out, somberly. "I will say, I am heartened to know that the Brigadier General is alive." Ed eventually pulled back and rested his elbows on his knees.
"Yeah, same here," Ed said, shaking his head soberly. He looked over at me. "I'm glad you weren't actually arrested either. I was ready to find Mustang and beat the living hell out of him."
"He mentioned something else," Breda said. Ed quirked a brow. "He said he didn't want to take a chance on some hot-tempered kid endangering the operation, so he sent you out here."
"Hot-tempered kid?" he exclaimed angrily, throwing his arms in the air suddenly and clenching his fists.
I stifled laughter; the previous tension of the moment burst. I couldn't help but think Breda had done that purposely.
"You said operation. Is there a phase beyond liberating Lieutenant Ross and General Hughes?" Armstrong asked, somehow able to ignore Ed's outburst.
"Indeed. He's got a plan to reel in the puppeteer, the one behind the conspiracy," Breda said, leaning in.
"No one calls me a— wait, what you say?" Ed said, suddenly forgetting his previous misgivings.
"You remember Barry from the fifth lab, right? He went on one hell of a rampage. They're bound to send someone to reclaim him," Breda said. The Major nodded.
"That would make sense. So, you wish to draw them out that way?"
"Yeah, though we're not sure who they're going to target first; Barry or the Colonel," Breda said. Ed turned up his nose.
"Why would they go after the Colonel?"
"Think about it; Mustang and Marina liberated a dead man, in the heart of Central at that. Would you let that slide?" he asked.
"I guess you're right," Ed said, looking over to me. "Is that why you sent her out here?"
"Right. We wanted to narrow who they'd target," Breda shrugged. "He wasn't exactly forthcoming about the details, but he had mentioned them having a particular interest in you, specifically, Marina." I nodded dully.
"Yeah," I said, giving Ed a knowing look. "That trouble we ran into, it was one of the people from the fifth lab."
"The Homunculi," Ed added lowly, clenching the fabric of his cloak.
I wrapped my arms around myself, a little unnerved. Envy's words lingered in my mind, swirling around like smoke. If the point of their last stunt were to secure me somehow, it was only a matter of time before they'd come looking for me. I could only hope that I'd have enough time to explain my circumstances to Ed and Al before they had a chance to find me. I glanced at Ed, who folded his hands together tightly, lost in thought. I decided I'd tell him about their plan after I had explained myself fully. The Major shuffled beside me, and I watched as he produced a little notebook and began sketching. He asked us questions about the Homunculi, how they looked, what abilities we knew they had, and the like. Breda provided what intelligence he had as well, as Fu looked on curiously. In a few minutes, we had a slew of sketches stretched in a circle in the dirt as he worked on another piece. Ross groaned.
"I've got nothing to do with this. Zilch. And yet, here I am, caught up in the middle of it. And framed by Homunculi," she pouted, deflated.
Major Armstrong placed his latest sketch on the ground, completing the circle.
"We've collected a fair amount of intelligence. And once we properly piece it together, we'll have the culprit behind this conspiracy, and behind the General's current state," Breda announced.
Everyone seemed pensive, and I felt strangely aware, knowing exactly who they were after.
"I promise you this, Lieutenant, we will absolve you of this crime," the Major assured the distraught Lieutenant, who sighed.
"Lieutenant Colonel— I mean, General Hughes. It's just hard to accept that they did that to him," Ed said, his face crestfallen. I wrung my hands together.
"What shall you do now, Edward Elric?" the Major asked. He looked up to the Major briefly before returning his gaze to the sand at his feet.
"Al and I committed a taboo. We still have people that help us. Some people get angry at us. Others support us silently. Each one of them has tried to help me keep my promise to my brother," Ed disclosed quietly. He squeezed his right wrist as he continued. "So, I have no choice. I can't turn back. Which means all I can do is move forward, right? And I'll protect everyone I can along the way."
He glanced over at me, his golden irises shining with an intensity I didn't quite understand, and I felt a strange stirring in my chest.
Why is he looking at me like that? I wondered in silent nervousness. He looked back to his open palms, his automail one gloved, but his flesh one free.
"I refuse to let another person become a victim. Not while I'm alive. I know that's a hard promise to keep. It's hard enough just trying to take care of myself. To think that I'm even capable of it... Maybe I'm just arrogant. But it's the only thing I can think of. So, I have to do it. I have to," he finished, clenching his fists, letting his arms rest over his knees.
He had spoken with such grit, such resolve; I wondered briefly if he was the same person I had met a few months ago. I couldn't tell what exactly was different. It was subtle, but he seemed more mature somehow. He looked a bit older now— broader, maybe. A bit wiser than then.
"What about you, Miss Marina?" the Major asked, catching me off guard.
I looked to my left, acknowledging the Major. I thought for a moment, noticing Ed's gaze fall on me.
"I suppose I could do anything, being a citizen now," I said wistfully, and Ed rose a curious brow. I met his eyes, apprehension apparent in them. I smiled. "You know, all this time I've been living day by day, taking things as they come the best I can. I still have so many questions, so many uncertainties I want to make sense of. I still have some things I need to get off my chest. I think I'll find some direction once I do."
Ed averted his gaze, looking a little flushed, and I wondered if the heat was getting to him. I looked around and noticed we were all in the shade.
Oh, I thought dully. The Major turned to Ross.
"And you Lieutenant? Where do you intend to seek asylum?" he asked her.
"Well, I think that I'm going to give Xing a shot," she said with a smile.
After an enlightening circle chat, we trekked back to where we had started, taking a slight detour to make it back swiftly. I gaped at all the new ruins there to behold. Ed walked quietly beside me.
"So, you're a citizen now?" he asked as I inspected a particularly interesting rune.
"How'd I know I couldn't just slip that little detail past you?" I poked at him. He didn't poke back as he usually did, so I continued. "Mustang granted me citizenship after I helped rescue Hughes." He nodded dully.
"That's great," he said, a little less enthusiastically than I had pictured him saying it.
"Yeah," I said, rubbing my arm. "I uh, have a cool little ID card and everything. I'll show it to you."
"Sure, sure," he said quietly.
I furrowed my brow. I wasn't exactly sure what was going on in that head of his, and it was starting to get to me.
"Ed, is everything okay?"
"Now that you're a citizen, you could go anywhere you want," he said flatly.
"Well, yeah," I conceded.
Breda had let it slip at some point that I was no longer in military custody either, though I was to take extreme caution when it came to the Homunculi.
"You don't have to travel with us anymore. Just like we planned," he said.
What was he going on about? We hadn't even trekked back across the desert and he was trying to get rid of me.
"Right," I said quietly, not sure what else to say. I bit my lips together. "I guess I'll head back to Central when we're done here."
"Why not come with me to Resembool?" he asked suddenly. He seemed surprised by his own question and scratched the back of his head. I rose a brow. "I mean— if you want. Before you head to Central." I cracked a smile.
"Sure, if that's alright with you. I wouldn't mind seeing Pinako," I said, thinking about her cooking.
She could be a little abrasive if you didn't chop a veggie right, but I learned a lot of helpful cooking techniques from her. We shuffled quietly through the desert before he spoke again, though I almost didn't catch it.
"Then you can give me the full story," he said quietly. "Whatever it is you've been keeping from me. What you want to get off your chest."
I stopped walking as he turned to me, an expectant look on his face. I understood better now, all that beating around the bush— now we made it to the root.
"So, that's what's been bugging you," I noted, feeling a little relieved. The feeling was quickly replaced with a reluctance.
"Yeah, it's just— I feel like there's still so much that happened that I don't know," he conceded. I looked to the ground and watched as the sand kicked up from my shoes.
"When I was taken," I added softly. "You mean then, right?"
"Yeah," he agreed. "I just want to know, you know, before you go."
Is he worried I'm going to disappear before I explain myself? I wondered. I swallowed a lump in my throat as I looked away, aware of the company we kept a few feet ahead as we resumed walking.
"I'd really rather speak to you more privately about it. I know you've waited all this time already, but could you hold on a little longer?" I asked. "I won't run out on you until I do, I promise."
I knew I was pushing the inevitable further and further, but there was a part of me that wasn't ready for his reaction yet. I had dreamed up scenario after scenario of how Ed would take the news of me being from the other side, and not one of them ended well. He gave me a look.
"A little longer?" he parroted.
"A little longer."
"Fine, a little longer," he surrendered, sighing harshly. "You know, you're killing me over here." He threw his arms up in a grand gesture to articulate the seriousness of his grumbling but threw me a grin.
Just a little longer, I thought, laughing at his childish but understandable reaction. He laughed too, and just like that, he was back to normal. We were back to normal as we approached the camp we had left behind. Let us stay like this a little longer.