It's been two months now and I still can't hear Kurosawa-san's thoughts. I have started to get used to his random visits as well. Like the other day, for example.
It was Friday evening and I had just finished writing a particularly difficult part of the story, when the doorbell rang. When I opened the door, I was greeted with a plastic bag dangling in front of my eyes.
"What's this?" I asked, knowing perfectly well whose face was hiding behind the bag.
"It's beer and snacks. I thought we could hang out and have a little chat." Kurosawa-san replied, shifting the bag out of the way and revealing a wide smile.
"Go away. I'm busy." I said, about to shut the door in his face. But Kurosawa-san was quicker than me and managed to slip through the crack and enter the apartment.
"Don't be like that." He said while placing the bag on the kitchen counter. "It's Friday evening. It's the perfect time for friends to have a drink and just talk."
"Who's your friend here? I don't see anyone." I snarled, leaning against the door, which was now rendered useless. It appeared that it couldn't keep away a slippery person like Kurosawa-san.
"You may brandish your sharp tongue at me, but I know that you are really a nice guy." he said, obviously ignoring my annoyed expression.
He turned his head and gave me one of his dazzling smiles. Even the corners of his eyes crinkled. At this point, there was nothing I could do. He was already inside and simply throwing him out didn't seem possible. There was only one thing to be done, take a deep breath and try to relax. Besides, I couldn't hear any weird thoughts from him so there was nothing much to worry about.
Without sparing a single moment, Kurosawa-san took my kitchen as his own. He placed the snacks in bowls, grabbed the bag with the beer cans and brought everything into the living room.
"Oh, before we start drinking, I have to ask." Kurosawa-san said stopping before he opened his beer. "Have you had dinner yet? If not, you should probably eat something. Drinking on an empty stomach is unwise."
"I already ate." I replied simply, taking a sit across from him at the short table.
"Really? Did you eat instant noodles again?" he questioned with a slight frown between his eyebrows.
"I had takeout. Yakisoba and ramen." I replied, picking up a can of beer and opening it.
"Oh, that sounds like a hearty meal. I'm glad."
"Why do you care so much whether I eat food or not? It's not like you owe me anything." I asked, feeling half curious and half confused. Really, what was inside this person's head, caring so much about a stranger.
"Of course, I care!" he yelped. "You are our most prized author, so it's only natural to take good care of you. Besides, if anything happened to you, Kota-san would have my head on a spike."
"You're exaggerating."
"Actually, I am not." He said, opening his beer and taking a big gulp. Then, he looked up and continued to speak calmly. "Before I first came to see you, Kota-san told me to take good care of you. He also said that after Haruka-san left you will find it difficult to adjust to someone new."
"That meddlesome person." I grumbled, taking a large gulp of beer. What was Kota-san thinking, telling this guy all this stuff?
"Perhaps, but that just means he cares about you."
I didn't answer to that and he didn't push me for a reply either.
After that, we spent several minutes, quietly sipping our beers. If I had to be honest, I would probably say that it felt strangely comfortable. Sitting at a table with Kurosawa-san, drinking beer and simply chatting like this... it wasn't so bad, I guess.
Maybe it was the alcohol getting to my head, or perhaps it was Kurosawa-san's honest behavior, but I soon found myself loosening up. Before I could stop myself, I opened my mouth and asked him something more personal that I normally would have.
"It's Friday night. Don't you have anyone waiting for you at home, Kurosawa-san?"
He looked at me, a little confused at first, before he began laughing and shaking his head.
"This old man is married to his job. There is only an empty house waiting for me."
Usually, when people talked like that, they would sound lonely and in need of comfort. But when Kurosawa-san said those words he sounded like nothing was the matter; as if life was just as it should be.
"That's a bit sad, isn't it?" I couldn't help but ask, glancing at him from over the beer can.
"Not really." He shrugged, gulping the beer until he finished the entire can in one go. Then, he smacked his lips together, a look of contentment appearing on his face. Glancing up he looked straight at me, a playful smile curving his lips. His voice was calm, but there was a subtle teasing hint to it. "Besides, you shouldn't be the one to talk. Aren't you doing the same thing? Living all alone in this apartment, keeping to yourself and spending your time writing and playing with a cat. It doesn't get any lonelier than that, now does it?"
No, I will not succumb to your prodding. This kind of provocation is beneath me and I will not respond the way you want me to! Besides, there have been many years since I have last talked to someone about my circumstances. It isn't like people are willing to believe someone can actually hear their thoughts.
"Not really." I said, looking away disinterestedly. "I am perfectly happy with the way things are. I have everything I need."
"Hmmm, if you say so." He hummed, opening another can of beer and taking a big sip.
"What about you? How did you end up in this field of work? You don't really look like the type of person who likes to read." I said, trying to steer the conversation away from me.
"Yes, I've been told that many times." He chuckled, leaning back slightly.
Several seconds passed by without hearing a reply from him. I glanced at him from the corner of my eye and was a bit startled. If I wasn't mistaken, there was a look of nostalgia in his bright eyes. In all this time I have known him, I have never seen him wearing that expression. It was a mixture of warmth and sadness that is impossible to describe in words. Could it be that I have said something insensitive?
I was just about to open my mouth and change the subject, when I heard his voice. It sounded low and somehow soothing, like a flow or warm water.
"It's not the first time someone has told me I do not look like a bookworm. In reality, though, I have always loved books. My parents were teachers. They both taught Literature. My mom worked at a middle school, while my dad had a post at a high school. They were both obsessed with books and loved to read. At home, we had an entire room filled with shelves upon shelves of books. With this kind of environment while growing up, one can easily imagine that I was influenced by them to a certain degree. However, I was also an active child, wanting to go out and play with friends, doing sports and just mess around. But on rainy days, or when I was tired, I would always prefer to sit in bed with a book in my hands and read the hours away."
Eh? This is rather surprising. I admit I never would have imagined Kurosawa-san to have such an intellectual background. Nor such a preference for the quietude of reading.
"Have you ever thought about starting to write your own stories?" I asked, suddenly curious whether he had the same feelings as me back then.
"No, I always preferred reading over writing. After devouring enough novels, I began to take an interest in reviewing and editing. I think it takes a whole lot of imagination to create something from nothing and I didn't believe I had that talent."
"I see." I nodded slowly. Indeed, not many people are able to write, and even if they are, it's not always guaranteed that they have the talent for it. "Is that how you ended up working for Suzumori Publishing?" I continued asking.
"Before I finished high school things changed at home, and later I almost didn't get to enter college." Kurosawa-san lowered his head, starring at the can of beer in his hand for a while before speaking. His expression looked pained, but he still continued to tell me his story. "Somehow, I ended up going to a local college. During that time, I worked for local newspapers, writing articles for magazines, even doing translations. I also did a few nightshifts at convenience stores and bars that paid relatively well. After graduation I got a part-time job at a small publishing company where I mainly did odd jobs and labor work. It took me over a year to get a full-time post there and be able to take on an editing task. But it was all worth it. During the beginner's year I was able to familiarize myself with what it meant to work in a publishing company and, therefore, it was easier to do my job afterwards. Since then, I've worked for two companies, the last one being a small branch of Suzumori publishing, until I was finally transferred here to the main company."
"Sounds like a rough journey."
"It was, but that's how life is." He said simply, without any pretense. "It doesn't always give you sunny days. That's why we have to cherish the ones we get, so that we can get through the storms."
"How poetic." I chuckled despite myself. "And you say you don't have a talent for writing."
"Yeah, yeah. You should feel lucky I didn't follow this path, otherwise we would have been rivals." He grinned, smacking his chest with a prideful look. Then, he raised his hand holding the beer and bumped it against mine. "How about you, Masato-sensei? How was your journey here?"
For a while I didn't know how I should answer him. After hearing his story, I felt slightly compelled to be honest with him. I thought that, perhaps if it was this person, I could finally be able to openly say what was inside my heart. I guess his straightforwardness was beginning to rub off on me. Thus, I opened my mouth and directly poured out everything I had been keeping hidden.
"When I was in middle school I got into an accident and ended up spending one year in a coma. When I woke up, I realized I could hear people's thoughts. At first, I thought it was a problem with my brain so I went and saw a neurologist. However, it didn't appear to be a physical issue. Therefore, I went to a psychiatrist, but that didn't work out well either. Nothing I did made the situation better so I eventually tried getting used to it. I wanted to avoid troublesome situations, so I began to keep a safe distance from other people and engrossed myself in reading. Soon, I became interested in writing and that's how I ended up here."
I stopped here and glanced up at him, waiting to see his reaction. Whether he would start laughing and calling me crazy, or shake his head believing I was mocking him, I wanted to see how Kurosawa-san would take this information. To my utter surprise, he didn't seem affected one bit. He simply held his beer and looked at me earnestly. Seeing how I was reluctant to continue, he simply tilted his head slightly and waited. The gesture immediately made me think of a large dog looking curiously at someone. I had to try and swallow back my laughter.
"Hmm, so that's why you've hauled yourself inside your house, refusing to go out if you could avoid it?" he finally asked after a while.
"I have been keeping a proper distance from social interaction." I pointed out.
"That's just a fancy way of putting it." Kurosawa-san scoffed, downing his beer. "In the end, it still means that you've isolated yourself from everyone else."
"Say it however you will."
"Honestly, for such a smart fellow you can be quite stupid sometimes." Kurosawa-san chuckled into his beer can.
Normally I would have gotten angry at him calling me stupid, but, oddly enough, that time I didn't find it annoying. Compared to others who have judged my way of life, Kurosawa-san didn't sound patronizing. His brutal honesty was actually very refreshing. I found myself smiling thinking about things from the past. Like how my friends found it too much to be around me when they realized I knew their real thoughts about me; or how my only girlfriend went out with me just to piss off another guy while thinking I was good looking but rather weird; or how my high school colleagues always thought I did well in exams because I read the teachers' minds and knew the subjects beforehand; even the teachers kept having doubts about me. Things went on like this until it had gotten to the point that people and me would mutually avoid each other. My family was the only exception, but I guess I can't do anything about that. Tragic stories are everywhere.
"What would you do if you had this ability, Kurosawa-san?" I asked, suddenly struck by a curious thought.
What would this person, who is usually honest and straightforward to a fault, do if he had the chance to read people's minds? Would he use it for his own benefit, or just like me, he would hide away from the world?
I turned to look at him and saw Kurosawa-san gazing at me with a thoughtful expression. His eyes were narrowed and his forehead was creased. After a couple of minutes, he finally opened his mouth to give me a reply.
"I would beat the crap out of everyone who insulted me in their heads."
What he said absolutely stunned me, rendering me speechless for a whole minute, before I finally couldn't hold it in anymore and I burst out laughing. Truly, this person really was something special. No matter how hard I tried, I could never understand him. I patted his shoulder and, as expected, I couldn't hear anything. I wondered, will I ever know what this person is truly thinking or will he forever remain a mystery?
That night I allowed Kurosawa-san to sleep on my couch. By the time we finished all the beers and snacks it was well past midnight. It was the first time I had someone sleep over at my place. Not even Kota-san, whom I have known for years, has been this favored.
When I finally went to bed, I found that for the first time in a long while, my mind felt at ease and calm. I was able to sleep through the night and only woke up when the sun was already high in the sky.
I squinted my eyes and considered going back to sleep, when I suddenly heard clanging coming from the kitchen. Curious as to what was happening, I slipped out of bed and headed towards the source of the noise.
There, in my kitchen, wearing an apron, was Kurosawa-san. He was holding a frying pan in one hand and a spatula in the other.
"Kurosawa-san, what are you doing?" I asked in a gruffy voice right behind him.
"Eeeek!" he yelped. "Gosh, say something before you come this close. You gave me a fright."
"I did say something. I asked you what are you doing."
"Ah, I am making scrambled eggs. Hope you like eating eggs. I didn't know what else to make in a jiffy so I went out and bought a few things. I also made coffee."
"I don't care about that." I frowned, brushing a hand across my forehead. "I want to know why you are cooking breakfast in my kitchen?"
"And where else would I cook it if not here?!" He turned and looked at me like I was an idiot.
In all honesty, for a moment, I myself thought I was being one, asking such stupid questions.
"Now stop being silly and go wash yourself. Food will be ready in a minute." I heard him saying before he turned his back at me to continue cooking.
Therefore, I could only admit defeat in front of this overbearing person. And in this manner, I got won over another bit with delicious food.
And bellow we have a bonus picture of Keita and Rintarou ^^
Hope you enjoyed today's chapter, as well the honesty these two begin to show towards each other. I really had a fun time imagining them getting closer through sharing their pasts, as well as beginning to trust each other more. Especially the cold and aloof Keita, he's slowly warming up to Rintarou.
Next chapter will be tomorrow. A certain Kota-san will finally make an appearance, disturbing Keita-kun in his sanctuary ^_~ Until then, wish you all a wonderful day!