You watched as Nao's face, completely dejected, harbored tears that fell as she sat by his body in a pool of blood. Too shocked to speak or even have a single thought, you held your mouth not to utter a word. Although, you had little interaction with the man, that sort of sight would send all rational thinking to a frenzy in anyone. You ran out of the room, your heart palpitating wildly. What happened? Everything keeps getting weirder to the point you can't make any sense of it. Through all the hectic noise, you started to feel sick to the stomach.
Thinking back at the way his flesh sizzled against the collar. The smell of it stinging your nostrils. You found yourself back in the spaceous main hall, away from everyone else. You heeled over holding your stomach and mouth, then stumbled back into the wall, sliding down into a fetal position. You felt your head spin making you lightheaded and dizzy. You grabbed your head in your hands, wanting to scream. As you tried to make sense of all the panic in your thoughts, you hyperventilated. You tried to rationalize, make sense of it like you always did. But this time, your emotions felt uncontrollable. You were angry, ashamed, sad. You lost the person that meant the most to you out of a selfish greed to survive. A man died a gruesome death not because he deserved it but because someone in the group felt they needed to be the one to survive. And, the worst part is you knew this isn't going to end anytime soon. There was no way they'd just let you out so easily, it was a pipedream.
"But it wasn't your fault." you thought aloud.
"Who's fault, Y/N?" Sou's voice startled you.
"Nothing!" You shouted, picking yourself up off the floor and dusting yourself off. You cleared your throat and your thoughts trying to form a coherent sentence that wasn't about the events prior. "I mean.. Sorry, I was just speaking to myself then." You muttered shamefully. The uncomfortable silence filled the air, however. Even if you couldn't see it, you felt his gaze strongly on you as if he could see into you. As if he knew exactly what you did.
"Y/N? Are you hiding something?" His eyes bore into you, you felt the guilt flooding you as he stared at you intensely. Your eyes starting to well up, he stepped closer. He had you backed up against the wall. You wrapped your arms around yourself and looked away trying to further yourself from him as much as you could in your trapped position and away from his gaze.
He smiled at you wearily. "I'm sorry, I'm not the best at comforting people." He scratched his chin in distress.
The tears that were welled up in your eyes finally fell as you closed them tight and sighed in relief. "Yeah, I can tell."
You shivered uncomfortably, who the fuck does that? Maybe it was in your head. Maybe he was just concerned about you and the guilt was getting to you. You shook off your uneasiness and wiped your eyes.
He started to babble and apologize profusely. But you were too caught up in your thoughts to care. You started to sob, and his apologies ceased. He took your hands into his and rubbed your knuckles with his thumbs.
"Y/N.." He gazed into your eyes with a stern look on his face. "If my assumptions are right, don't worry. You couldn't have done anything about it."
His words triggered it all to come out. As if on impact, you fell to the floor wailing, grasping at your hair and holding your face as you let it out. And in between your cries you managed to get out, "she's gone."
"..It was Hikari, right?" he rubbed your back as you cried into his shoulder, your sobs turning into sniffles.
Wiping your tears, you asked him, "How did you know?"
"I remember someone cute saying her name."
Q-Taro gasped aloud, "Now when'd this get here?!"
Surprised by his booming voice, you pushed Sou away and covered your puffy red eyes.
Shortly after Sara made her way to the central hall. "Don't tell me these stairs lead to the main game grounds?"
Q-Taro, all pumped up, fiercely said "Dunno 'bout that. But whatever the case, bet we gotta go."
You settled down now, feeling completely out of body. But as you started to numb to your feelings you started to analyze them. Maybe at first you were in denial of what happened. And maybe as you realized this isn't a situation you can just brush aside and fix like you always do, those emotions that have been pushed aside for so many years finally had you in its grasp. And in a moment of weakness, you shared those tears with another. You kept in your own thoughts, and drifted from hypotheticals and analyses to memories. You never cried this much before. When you felt any negative emotion you always shut it off . Hikari was the closest person to you and you never even cried to her once. And, now with regrets you have to live the rest of your life knowing she was gone because of you. The light of your life was now dead because of you. You could have sacrificed yourself. And you didn't. You could have saved her. As the extreme apathy settled in, you turned away as they continued to talk with concern of Miley's current location. As you did, Sou grabbed you by the arm preventing you from leaving. You glanced back before pulling your arm out of his grasp. "..What are you doing?"
Shocked by your reaction, he put his hands up in defense "My mistake! I just thought we should stick together especially with how things seem to be going, it'd be safe to be in a pair."
Detached from all reality, you held out your hand for him to take. You didn't know what to think of him, if he was trustworthy or not. But given your position, it wasn't like you wanted to be alone either.
He took your hand, you held it tightly and closed your eyes as you walked. Feeling his warmth, you reminisced in the way you held hands with Hikari; squeezing it tightly in comfort.
But as you were mindlessly clinging onto memories of her, Sou's voice pulled you out of thought. "Y/N?"
"Huh? oh.. yes?"
"Are you feeling okay? You're squeezing my hand really hard"
You took it back and held your arm instead, to replace the feeling of warmth. "Sorry, just not in the right headspace."
You two head back into the dark tucked away room, you take a chair and lay your head down on the table. Watching as Sou sits besides you, wasting no time to get back to work, turning the laptop back on.
"Sou..?" You asked, tugging on his shirt. You felt so incredibly weak, that indifference started to feel heavy. And whatever life you had before had completely dissipated into nothing. You played with the fabric of his shirt deep in thought, thinking of the way Hikari would cling onto you. You just couldn't get your mind off her.
"I know what you're going to say already, but before you do." He grabbed your hand tight in his, turning his face away from you. "Moping won't do us any good. Just focus on our task at hand."
Your eyes pulled away from his shirt and to his face as he sat in thought looking at the laptop. Observing through your puffy lids as his face screamed emotionless despite what had happened before. Roughly pulling your hand away, you get up from your chair in annoyance. "How would you know what I was going to say? You barely know me."
As you go to leave the room, you're met face to face with Sara, "Oh sorry." You say, trying to find your way around her.
"Y/N, are you leaving? Sou told me to meet you two here." She said cocking her head, stepping into the room.
"Oh, did he?" You snuck a glance at him in disbelief before forcing a chuckle, "I'll stay for a little while longer." Taking a step back, you redirected your attention back to Sou and took your seat back next to him. "I assume he wanted to show you the laptop, right?"
You were a bit snappy, but you didn't want to cause any unneeded disturbance. So you sucked it up, playing nice to him despite wanting your distance.
Her eyes lit up as she hurried over. "Could this give us a clue on a way out of here?"
You shook your head, "Maybe.. But there's a password and it looks a little low on battery."
Sou continued, "Once the battery's dead, it's over. I want to investigate what's on it, but..."
Sara sighed, "Well it could be anyone's guess.. Try a birthday maybe?"
"Ah, the classic password. ...In a bad way." Sou said as he scanned the laptop in thought.
Sara huddled next to you, looking over at it. "If it's a birthday, then we'll find the answer in 365 tries!"
You laughed, before nudging Sou, trying to mask the irritation. "Better start cracking at it."
He pouted before looking away, "Don't bully me, Y/N." You beamed at him as you pat his head in a patronizing way.
You rubbed your chin, "I was hoping that we could find a password in those books earlier. Like the password just conveniently there. But that would definitely be a trap."
Sou laughed at you a little too hard, making you squint at him. "You and your traps!"
Annoyed, you pretended to laugh along, not wanting to cause unnecessary tension.
Sara smiled, before looking back down at the laptop and they began to discuss why there might be one here in the first place. You waited patiently, your blood actually beginning to boil as you listened to Sou continue to speak. And as she left, you waved to her as you watched her figure disappear in the dark hallway then closed the door with a firm click.
Your smile quickly curled into a frown, knitting your brows, as you spun your head towards Sou. "Okay, what is your deal right now? You're acting quite fucking shady to me right now."
"I'm sorry?" He says with a worried expression, acting so innocent as if nothing's the matter, maybe it was the stress but you were really infuriated with his behavior.
You groan loudly, turning it into a growl at the end as your frustration laces your voice when you begin to go off on a tangent. "That whole thing outside when I was crying was really weird! You acting like everything is fine after someone died is really weird! You flirting with me is REALLY fucking weird! What is your deal right now?? What normal person just says stop moping after watching a person's head fall off??!"
You pant as you finish, the anger that's boiling in you leaves your body shaking. You weren't exactly sure why you decided to blow up on him like that. It felt out of character for you, but at the same time it seemed right. You didn't even notice the tears streaming from your eyes until a drop fell from your chin. As you go to wipe the tears from your eyes, the anger has melted away as fast as it boiled. It just left you feeling utterly empty.
He says nothing for a while, Sou stays silent as he sits there watching you cry. Eventually, he leans in holding your face in his hands wiping the tears from your eyes.
"There just wouldn't be any point in mourning, at this time." He grimaced. "If the circumstances were different, I would of course take the time to give in to my emotions. But doing that right now will only hold us all back." He wraps his arms around you and pulls you into a hug, laying your head on his shoulder. "We are in a life or death situation, we already lost a few people and I am not going to end up the same fate. Otherwise what did we fight for?"
You sobbed loudly as he held you in his arms, soaking up his jacket. After a while, your cries eventually turned into sniffles, which turned into silence. You held him back tightly, "Sou.. I really never have been the type to be so emotional. I'm sorry that was really unprofessional of me."
He pulled away and pat your head, mimicking the way you did earlier. Turning his attention back to the screen, your eyes started to droop as you saw his fingers type away letters and names in different ways. You were so mentally exhausted from this point in time.
"This will take forever Sou.." You cupped your mouth as you yawned.
"I think I knew that already." He paused and leaned back in the chair. "Hey, Y/N, you remember the chalkboard in the bar?"
"I do. Why do you ask?"
"You remember the names on there, right?"
"Right. There were names on the board of people we never even met." You gasped, eyes widening. "You think it's the kidnappers?"
He gave you a slight glance that was quickly hidden beneath his soft lashes. Despite the soft and timid appearance he had, there were moments in his behavior that seemed untrustworthy. But also seeming mature in the way he prioritized escaping over his emotions. "Or the ones who failed the first task."
You scanned him for an answer, he was an enigma to you. But maybe staying with him could actually be beneficial. "That could be it too.."
"It didn't have the last names on it, did it?" He asked, his mouth covered with the scarf in his hand.
"I don't believe so. I remember most of people's names though."
He let out a barely audible grumble, before plastering a smile. "Okay, tell me some of the last names you know then."
You begin to list out the last names of the people you remember, pausing every now and then to recollect those introductions in your head. Then, the screen changed, grabbing both your attentions and you gasped. "Sara.. This can't be hers right?"
Sou shook his head before looking through the files, "No, why would someone put their own last name as a password?"
"Still, I'm surprised they would keep the password so plain and simple. But this means the owner has to be one of us right?"
As you saw him search through the files, you saw an assortment of emails in an exchanging conversation. Your eyes widening as it skimmed through the text.
"These are Kai's emails..?" You sat back trying to wrap your head around it. "Is Sara in on this? I don't get it. I feel like the more we search through the less sense it all makes. Why put herself in danger like this if she's working for the masterminds?"
Sou stays silent as he continues to read through the text in thought, not answering you. You stand up from your chair, which Sou takes notice. "We need to tell someone."
"Are you stupid?" He finally speaks up, but the words that come from his mouth makes your eye twitch. "We don't know what power they have. We also don't know the full facts and bringing it out hastily like this may cause more trouble than good."
He sighs and gets up, placing his hands on the sides of your face before giving you a bright smile and leaning in close. "We can also use information like this to our advantage when the opportunity arises."
You grunt before slapping his hands away. "Sou, I'm not going to manipulate these people. I don't know what's in your sick head, but I'm not hiding information like this."
As you make your way for the door, Sou slams his hands on the wall behind you, trapping you between his arms and getting uncomfortably close. Your heart's racing as he whispers closely into your ear, the hot air tickling you and sending shivers up your spine.
"Don't be a hypocrite Y/N. If you want to say something, you might as well stop hiding your secrets as well."
You shove him off you and dart out of the room. Getting out of breath as the anxiety is tantalizing you. Your already dried out tired eyes start to cry again, and wiping them starts to burn from irritation. Then, you take a moment to stop and rest yourself. With you head spinning and your chest palpitating wildly, you grip your chest before coughing till you see someone run up to you.
"Hey Y/N! have you seen Nao?"
You look up, still gasping for air. It's Joe who's looking around frantically. "I.. I haven't seen her.. why?"
He looks you deep in the eyes before tilting his head to get a better look at your face. "Hey.. you don't look good, are you okay?"
You regain your composure and stand up straight before giving one last sigh and answering, "I'm perfectly fine." You stand there deep in thought as you look at him, analyzing the situation. It sounds like Nao's gone. You could stay with him until you find out what to do with Sou and that laptop. But could Joe be trusted? He is Sara's friend maybe he's just as untrustworthy as her.
"Would you mind helping me look for her then? Sara and Keiji are searching the second floor."
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right. if some of u are new here i leave out some details in between chapters because i assume you all have played the game or seen the gameplay right? and i dont want to write a complete carbon copy of the original story.