AN: Warning, mention of suicide, self harm and eating disorders
YN POV:
I was getting more and more worried about Newt, he hasn't talked to anyone in at least 2 weeks. The only time he goes outside is to go running. I haven't seen him eat anything in a while. I was gong to ask him today about what was wrong but when he woke up he was suddenly back to being himself again, well more or less.
I was in the maze right now running with Newt, when I turned around and he wasn't there,
"Newt!?" I yelled. No reply.
"Newt, where are you? Newt?!" I yelled starting to get really worried for him. Still no reply. I started walking back the way I came and that's when I saw it...
NEWTS POV:
I can't take it anymore, the pain is to strong. You should kill yourself, your worthless! A voice in my head said.
I haven't eaten anything in days, why would I waste perfectly good food on someone who's going to be dead? Your nothing but a pain! The voice hissed. Nobody cares about you!
I was sitting on my bed just thinking. everyone would be better off if you were dead! I couldn't deal with this, I took a blade out from the drawer next to my bed.
I took the metallic object and put the blade onto my pale wrist, I slowly pressed it against my skin until I felt warm liquid come out of it. I've been doing this for months now I guess I just can't take the pain anymore. I've been hiding my cuts from my friends by wrapping bandages around them and always wearing long sleeve shirts no matter the temperature.
You should just kill yourself! No one will even notice you're gone!
I couldn't take the pain any longer, it was consuming me from the inside, feeding off of me. I was going to do it today, I was going to die today.
I wrapped my wrist in a fresh bandage and came out of my room. I went to the kitchens and sat down with my friends.
"Hey, you alright man?" Minho asked.
"I'm fine." I said and put a fake smile on my face.
After Minho and YN finished eating we grabbed our gear and went to the door. When it finally opened Minho told us "Alright guys you're running section 2 and I'm running section 8. See you later shanks."
"Bye" I said. We all then ran into the maze.
Four hours had gone by and I finally decided it was time, I would finally get rid of the pain forever.
When YN wasn't looking I turned a different way than I should have and came to a stop, I looked up at the wall before grabbing onto the vines and starting to climb.
I was half way up when I heard YN's voice, "Newt!?" she yelled "Newt, where are you? Newt!?" she sounded worried. Nobody cares about you Newt! Just do it, just jump. Maybe you can do this one thing right!
So I let go of the vines, I was falling through the air when something suddenly caught my leg which made immense pain pulse through my entire body. The last think I saw before everything turned black was a small figure coming from the corner and that's when everything turned into a black abyss.
YN POV:
It was Newt, he was entangled by vines on the stone wall blood surrounding him and his ankle was at an angle it wasn't supposed to be at. I ran towards him and cut the vines that were holding him up, he fell onto the ground with a light thud.
"Newt please wake up." I said, my voice cracking in the middle of the sentence. Tears slowly fell from my eyes as I shook him gently. I then checked his neck for a pulse, I let out a sigh of relief, he was still alive.
I wrapped his arm around my shoulder and attempted to pick him up, I wasn't very strong but when it came to a life and death situation I had to do this. And then I started dragging him back towards the glade.
I was turning the last corridor before the glade, I was dragging Newt with me, my muscles were burning and my breaths were uneven. When I finally got there I screamed for the med-jacks at the top of my lungs and laid Newt on the ground, his head in my lap.
"What happened?!" Alby shouted, Minho running beside him.
"He-he jumped." I stuttered my voice cracking, tears were falling down my cheeks.
The med-jacks finally came and put him on a make-shift stretcher. They picked him up and took him to the med-jacks hut, Alby, Minho and I following not to far behind them.
When we made it to the hut they set him down on a bed and looked over his injuries.
"Broken ankle, fractured ribs and heavy bruising" Jeff said looking up at the 3 of us.
"w-will he be okay?" I asked.
"He will be in a coma for the next few days, he hit his head pretty hard. He will have a limp for the rest of his life, But he should be fine." Clint, the other med-jack, replied.
"Should be!?" I shouted frantically.
"I got my job the same way you did." Clint replied.
"Alright lets go guys." Alby said to me and Minho.
"No." I replied
"What do you mean 'No'?" Alby asked.
"I'm not leaving him." I replied.
"Look we're all worried about him but-" He cut himself off when I glared at him, "Fine." He said. And after that Minho and Alby left to let the med-jacks work.
"Okay, we'll need to put his ankle back into place." Jeff said to Clint. "YN can you hold onto him for us?"
"Y-yeah" I replied, my voice cracking.
We then got to work, I held onto Newt whilst Clint and Jeff fixed his foot, they got a couple of sticks and set it around his ankle, then put bandage around it to make a make-shift cast.
After that they both left and I sat down on the floor next to Newt's bed and took a hold of his hand. Please be okay. I thought to myself.
I've been sat next to his bed for 3 whole days, I've been feeding him soup and water to the best of my ability. I haven't left his side the entire time, well apart from going to the bathroom. The others are starting to worry about me, Minho would bring me food and visit me whenever he could. Everyone was surprised by my actions, they all thought Newt and I hate each other, well we do, but that doesn't mean that we don't care for one another. Him and I had a weird relationship, we argued and called each other names all of the time, but when the other was hurt or in danger we always helped each other, the best we could.
Why didn't you just ask him what was wrong? I can't help but feel like this is all my fault, if I just talked to him about why he's been skipping meals or why he went into the deadheads all of the time, maybe I could have helped him get through this. I looked up at the boy and noticed a bandage around his wrist that was originally covered by his white hoodie, I rolled up his sleeve and started to slowly unwrap his bandage, I was scared, scared of what I would see, when there was only one layer left I stopped, what will I find when I look at his wrist? I let out a deep breathe and finally unwrapped the last part of the bandage, what I saw made my breath hitch in my throat, that's why he's been sneaking off into the deadheads and that's why he's only been wearing long sleeved shirts. Under the bandage, was a series of cuts all over his wrist, that's why he was so off lately, he was in pain, not a physical pain but a mental pain, one so severe that caused him to try and kill himself.
I decided to clean the cuts, so they wouldn't get infected, I stood up from my position on the floor and went to the shelf with the medical supplies, I took out some of the rubbing alcohol and a new bandage. I went and sat down back next to Newt, I put alcohol on a small cotton ball and then took the blonde boys wrist, I carefully swiped the alcohol-covered cotton ball along each one of his cuts. After doing that I gently wrapped the fresh, white bandage around his wrist. I then put the supplies away and sat back down on the floor. That's when I lost it, I started crying and breathing heavily. Why didn't I notice? How could I have been so oblivious to what was happening? Why didn't he tell us that he was in pain? So many questions but no answers. I slowly leaned my head on the bed, still holding onto Newt's hand and I let the darkness consume me.