{ Y/n's POV }
"Wait so Ella actually called you and you met up with her?" Liam asked
"Well yes but I didn't know it was her" I said
"Oh alright. So you forgave her?"
"Liam you know me. I don't give second chances. You have one and you screw that one up and we're done" I told him and he nodded his head
"But Elena gave you a million chances even though you really screwed up badly" he said
"Where did that bring us?" I asked
"Nowhere" he said
"Exactly" I said and walked into the kitchen
"But honestly Liam, do you think that what she did was fucked up?" I asked him
"100%. I don't even know why she did that. Like for what? Honestly every time I'm there I never talk to her" he said
"My brother is a loyal bitch period" I said and he started laughing
"I sometimes still wonder how I deal with your gay ass" he said
"Because I'm amazing and a bad bitch" I said
"Meh I don't know" he said
"I am" I said and glared at him
"Yes yes, you are" he put his hands up in defense and laughed
"Anyway" I said and poured myself some water
"Well I have to leave now. Got to meet up with someone" he said
"You're going on a date" I wiggled with my eyebrows
"Yes, on a date with my uncle" he said with a straight face before I started laughing
"Sweet home alabama" I said
"You're impossible" he laughed
After he said bye he left and I immediately went to get some tequila in the basement. I walked upstairs into my room and poured myself a shot before I downed it. I rememberd that Harry was going to come over later so I didn't let myself get drunk. After an hour or so he was here and we were in the living room watching spongebob
"How is Ariana?" He asked and leaned against the armrest
"First of all wipe that smirk off your face before I handle it myself. And I don't know I haven't really heard from her in a week or something" I shrugged
"What? Why?" He asked
"Well I don't know" I said
"Well you should know the reason why you don't text her" he said
"I never text her" I said and he looked confused
"I only reply to her texts" I said and he shook his head
"I hope you know that she doesn't deserve to be treated like this from you. You can treat anyone else like this but not her. She never gives up on you even when you treat her like nothing" he said
"Well maybe it's because I don't care" I said
"No, it's because you're scared" he said and I let out a small chuckle
"Scared of what? A 5 foot something italian with a ponytail?" I asked sarcastically and he shook his head
"You're scared of letting her inside and getting hurt. You're scared of becoming too important to her and hurting her. You're scared that she actually makes you let down your walls and actually manages to get out your soft side. You're scared that she'll save you only to let you down again" he said and looked at me
I chuckled and shook my head
"Not true Harry, not true. Sorry to disappoint you" I said and got up
"You're lying. I can see it in your eyes. You've already fallen in love with her and you're scared. You just don't want to admit it to yourself and anyone else but you can't lie to me Y/n. You try to hide it but your eyes give it away" he said
"I don't know what you're talking about" I said and started walking towards the stairs
"Don't dodge it Y/n. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Stop being scared and start living. She could be the one. I hope you know that both of you are going to end up really hurt by your actions. I thought you were one who doesn't care about consequences. I know you love her. Stop lying to yourself" he said and I swallowed
"Sorry but nothing you said is true. There's no love for her inside me" I said
"There is. Your love is not gone Y/n. I know it. You can't turn your emotions off-"
"I already did. I don't feel anything. Stop this" I snapped
"You fucking love her get that through your big head" he snapped
"I don't love anyone bro!" I yelled at him and started walking upstairs
"Walk away. Walk away like you always do. But it won't bring you far" he said and I could see him walking to the door
"Bye Y/n. I'll talk to you later" he said after I got in my room
I closed the door, walked to the window and stared at it blankly. After I heard the front door shut and Harry's car drive off, I grabbed a picture of me and Ariana laughing with each other. I looked at it for five seconds before throwing it at the ground and watching the picture frame break
"FUCK" I yelled
He couldn't be right. He just couldn't be right. I couldn't be in love again. I couldn't get my heart broken again. I couldn't break another heart. Especially hers. I couldn't do that to her
Another two hours passed and I was high out of my mind. Not only did I smoke weed but God knows how many drugs I had in my body.
Showing emotions was so hard and rare for me. I couldn't even show that I was mad until I exploded.
I bottled everything up until I exploded like a bomb. I lost control over everything. It was like I didn't see anything and anyone. My vision became blurry and all I focused on was my anger and letting it out. I didn't like being around people when I had those outbursts because I could seriously hurt them, physically and emotionally
All my emotions were mixed right now and on top of everything I was high outta my mind. What Harry said was the cherry on top of the cake. I couldn't control myself and this was the point where I wasn't myself anymore. I would regret everything once I came down but while in it I didn't regret anything
I punched the mirror in my room and my hand started bleeding. The mirror fell down and broke on me, a big piece of it pushing into my stomach
I have no idea how but it happened
My mouth opened but not a single sound escaped. I could barely breathe and I started spitting out blood. I put my hand on my cupboard for support and slowly dropped to the floor. My phone was laying on the ground next to me so I picked it up with the strength I had left
I didn't want to text Ariana at first so I just texted one of my school friends. I talked to her as long as I could before my breathing got worse. I found myself calling Ariana and she immediately picked up
"Y/n?"
"A- Ariana" I choked out
"Oh my God Y/n! Are you okay?" She asked worriedly
"I- I'm sorry" I whispered
"No no. I'm on my way. Don't hang up baby please" she said
I could hear that she was crying and for the first time I felt bad
"O- okay"
"Shh don't talk. I'm almost there" she said
I held my stomach and looked down. The blood didn't stop and it started hurting badly. I didn't want to pull the piece of glass out because I didn't want to make it worse
I could hear her soft whimpers and cries through the phone and it broke my heart if I was completely honest. After three minutes I heard her yell my name in the house and she had already hang up
"Y/n"
"H- here" I tried to say
After a few seconds she bursted into my room. I looked at her and felt the sweat drops roll down my face. She gasped loudly when she saw me and my room. She ran over to me and immediately held me to her chest
"Fuck baby. What did you do?" Ariana asked through tears
She called the ambulance and explained the situation to them. They told her to carefully take the piece of glass out and try to stop the bleeding
She carefully and slowly started pulling the glass piece out and that's when we both noticed how deep it was. I looked at her with fear in my eyes
"We can do this Y/n. Please help me with this" she said and I nodded my head
She started pulling again and I winced in pain. I put my bloody hand on hers and guided it. She looked at me softly after I put my hand on hers but quickly returned her attention back to my stomach.
We finally managed to remove the glass and she made me lay down. She took her hoodie off leaving her in just a bra. She put it on my stomach to stop me from bleeding. It helped the bleeding but it seemed like nothing could help the tears that were falling from her eyes
My eyes were getting heavier and I finally closed them
"Stay with me please" she begged but I couldn't fight my eyes anymore
"Don't leave me. I love you Y/n. Don't leave me" she cried softly
"Please don't leave me. Don't do this to me" her voice was hoarse and she sounded tired
"Please don't do this to me. I can't lose another angel. Stay with me please" she cried helplessly
She sounded so hopeless and broken. Someone else walked into my room and I felt my body being lifted up
"I love you. Please don't leave me" she was letting go of my hand but I squeezed it
"Please let me hold her hand. She doesn't want me to let go" I heard her talking to someone
About two hours later I slowly opened my eyes and felt her hand still holding mine. When had I even fallen asleep?
"I promised you I would never let go and give you up" she said and carefully wrapped her arms around my neck
I slowly wrapped mine around her back and pulled her closer to me. She cupped my face in her hands and leaned her forehead on mine and looked me deeply in the eyes
"You scared me so much. Never do that again" she whispered and I nodded my head slowly
She looked down at my lips then back into my eyes
"I love you so much. Don't leave me" her eyes filled with tears
That's when I knew, she really genuinely cared about me and loved me
"L- love you too" I whispered
"You don't have to say anything. I already know" she smiled softly
"I'm going to get the doctor okay?" She asked and I nodded my head
She left for a few minutes before coming back with the doctor
"Hello I'm doctor Jones. How are you feeling?" He asked
"Like shit"
"Where does it hurt?" He asked
"Here" I said and pulled the blanket off me
I slowly and carefully pulled the hospital shirt up and pointed to my stomach. Ariana flinched when she saw it and took my hand in hers
"We put something inside which will clean the wound and after the wound is clean, which should be tomorrow morning we will put you in surgery and look further from there" he said and I nodded my head
"As for now you have to rest a lot and don't even try to get up or move a lot, best go to sleep. And don't drink or eat anything because your wound is open" he told me
"Alright" I sighed out
Ariana put her free hand on my cheek and rubbed it softly
The doctor explained some further things and left. So it was just me and Ariana
_________
Hellooo it's been forever. I missed you
This chapter was boring and bad as hell I know
Thanks for reading, commenting and voting
Stay safe and take care 🖤