"Goodmorning, my dear," All Might greeted.
His eyes were sunken, etched in dark circles, and immersed in pain. He had some sort of bowl in his hands, a plastic spoon hanging out the side. Painfully, I pushed up onto my hands and forced myself to sit up. I tried to gasp in pain, biting down on my tongue as a voiceless whine whispered through my throat.
All Might furrowed his eyebrows, having to look away once my arms began shaking and I squeezed my eyes shut in pain. "Ice chips," He whispered, sitting beside me as he sat them in my lap. "Have you tried speaking?"
I woke up just yesterday, but this afternoon was spent in surgery. It was quick, one that barely surpassed an hour. Soon enough after that, Recovery Girl had spent the entire evening having healers cycling through my room every few minutes in order to attend towards my throat as best she could. I was grateful, and couldn't even imagine the debt in which I was to her after this hospital visit.
Still- I haven't spoken yet. There were words burning my throat like fire and carving themselves into my tongue which pressed against my teeth and begged me to try, but still. For some reason-
I was afraid to speak.
Afraid of the lies my mouth would spew to protect those I love.
Afraid I would say the words that I feared like nothing before.
I shook my head, gradually reaching my aching hand down for the ice as he watched me attentively. He sat a bag down, rummaging through it as I watched him pull out my homework from UA and begin flipping through it. "Bakugo..." He hummed, his eyes scanning across every problem and note I'd taken. "Bakugo is going to come in and try to help you with your homework a little bit..." He sighed, pulling a pencil from my bag as he began rapping it against his chin in contemplation.
"You haven't missed much... The school's under construction for dorms and the world has seemed to stop since our fight with All For One. People have been taking time from work and school, so you've got a bit of time to rehab and study before going back. You've got that provisional license exam coming up too..." He began scribbling something down, trying to solve the problems on my homework. I didn't bother to lean over and see what he was doing- too focused on trying to raise my arm high enough to reach my mouth with an ice chip. "They were going to send Iida, but... I figured Bakugo was second best. Besides, family is what you need right now. Young Bakugo... well he's one of the most loyal people I've ever seen."
I reached out, tapping my finger on the tops of my paper as I tried to get him to lay his hand out to me. He looked up, quickly setting the pencil down before following my request.
I-Z-U-K-U
"Getting loaded up on fluids... he'll be up and in here in a little bit."
A-W-A-K-E
"Yes, he's starting to stir," He chuckled, shaking his head. "Should have seen him, Asami. I thought he was going to hit the nurse trying to get her off of him... saying something about how he needed to get to you and apologize. It was no use, he was too tired to even get up and walk in here. Kind of like when you woke up from your coma and you were all exhausted? Except, he wasn't exactly in a coma..." He hummed, glancing up at me before flipping through the sheets of paper and eventually closing the binder after finishing only one page of work.
"Asami, try to say something. Um... try saying your name."
I bit down on a piece of ice, the shattering and grinding of it between my teeth fluttering through my ears. I bit my cheek for a second, trying to swallow before attempting to speak. I watched him for a second, wrapping the sheets in my hands into a weak fist as I tried to sum up the courage to possibly embarrass the living hell out of myself.
"A-" I hummed, scolding myself for not being able to get the entire word out immediately. I bit down on my cheek, forcing the coppery taste from my flesh before glaring down at my lap. My voice sounded weak and raspy... as if I hadn't had water in years.
"You don't have to-"
I shook my head, insinuating that I was done. My face was burning, and my fingertips had gone white after digging them into the palm of my hand as roughly as I could manage. Which... wasn't exactly much.
Suddenly the door clicked open.
My head snapped towards the sound, my neck popping and causing me to seethe in pain as I stared back at the person trying to close the door as softly as they could manage. There were earbuds in his ears, a hood pulled up over his head and a black backpack hanging loosely off one shoulder. In his free hand, he was holding some brown paper bag.
As soon as he turned and his eyes met mine, they went wide.
Bakugo.
"I'll leave you two alone. Asami-" All Might nudged a little white remote onto my lap, insinuating that if I needed him that I just had to push some little red button. He smiled, ruffling my hair before turning to make his way for the door.
He passed Bakugo, whose eyes were still wide and gripping the paper bag and backpack strap so roughly that little explosions were starting to go off around his hands. All Might stopped beside him, leaning down before whispering something to him.
Bakugo straightened out, readjusting his backpack before making his way to stand beside the bed and I listened as All Might left, closing the door behind him.
Bakugo stared at me, his lip beginning to quiver before he dropped his backpack onto the floor. He threw the little brown bag at the end of my bed, ripping his earbuds from his ears by the cord before he choked up. A small little cry from his throat as he began sobbing and jumped onto the bed, wrapping his arms around my torso.
It burned, causing my eyes to go wide and the breath to knock from my lungs. My skin ached with every movement he took. He was shaking, his body silently racking with sobs as he buried his face into my shoulder.
"Deku..." He sobbed. "He said he couldn't feel you. You- you son of a bitch! You told me goodbye! You ever tell me goodbye again and I'll... I'll kill you, dammit! You hear me?!" He was angry now, his throat burning and his words full of spit and resentment. He looked up, causing our eyes to catch as I was met with a reddened and puffy-eyed blondie. He didn't look like himself... seemingly so much older.
"I'll kill you," He sobbed once more, taking a shaky breath and wiping his tears off on my shoulder before wrapping his arms under my armpits, digging his fingernails into the tops of my shoulders as he forced me as close to him as he could manage. "You told me at the sports festival that when you have people, you do things for them. If this" -he leaned back, gesturing to my battered body- "Is things!? Then you damn bastard- I don't want anything!"
He sat up, sharply rubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand before quickly shaking his head, as if shaking off the fact he had just cried. He ran his hands through his hair, exhaling a huge breath before groaning and slamming his fist down onto the bed. He huffed, side-eyeing me in a glare before sniffling and scoffing at me. "You haven't said anything. You tried to tell me goodbye like you were dying and then throw me through the air and you don't even have the decency to say hello? What are you? Fucking mute or some shit? Say something, dammit!"
I stared back at him- unable to even signal anything to him that I hadn't been able to speak yet. I wanted to reach out, grab his hands, and trace out the words. But I was afraid of his hands going off in anger.
"Asami!" He was practically growling now, his eyes glowering and his chin lowered as he glared at me with everything in him. "You worthless piece of- say something! Asami, you're scaring me! Cut it out!" He reached out, grabbing my jaw and cheeks roughly as he forced my mouth open and forced me to stare at him. I grabbed at his wrists- trying to force him off of me before I finally caught his eyes once more.
He's terrified.
I forced him to let go, him staring with wide eyes while I glared and held his gaze. He was trembling in my hands, his eyes running over every scar my body held as his breathing grew ragged and sporadic.
He must feel like he's looking at his best friend's corpse.
I twisted his wrist- ignoring his protests as I drug my fingernails against the palm of his sweaty hand and tried to communicate in the only way I had left.
S-T-O-P
His body fell limp, weakly sitting before me in a defeated manner as he held his hand out to me. His mouth hung open, his eyes wide as he stared at the bandages wrapped around my arms and torso that had been exposed when I sat up and the blanket fell away. "It's like lightning..." He whispered.
I looked down, seeing the few exposed scars along my arms and stomach before looking back up to find his hand still limply resting palm-up in my own.
H-U-R-T
He scoffed, shaking his head and closing his eyes before he looked down in his lap. I couldn't see his face anymore... I could only the way his hand began absently playing with the laces of his shoes. "I've never really heard you admit that something hurts," He sighed. "Must be pretty bad, huh?"
S-U-R-E
He hummed, and I watched a tear slip from his chin and fall onto the sheets below him before he roughly rubbed the back of his sleeve across his eyes. "I, uh- I got this for you. I know you like Deku, so..." He reached into the paper bag, tossing a little black rectangle onto my lap. "We haven't been friends long enough to know whatever kind of shitty things you like, but... I know for sure you like that shitty nerd and I don't like getting things wrong. Don't thank me or anything, just take the damn thing and keep your mouth shut. It's not like I worked hard on it or anything."
I picked it up, flipping it over to find a picture of Izuku and I placed in a little black wooden frame.
Izuku... He was laughing, his arm wrapped around my neck as he beamed up at the camera. His cheeks were a tad bit pink, smiling so hard that his eyes were shut. His cheek smushed up against my face.
My scarless and innocent face.
I was grinning and obviously trying to hide it, my face burning red and my arms crossed as I glanced up at him beside me. Judging by the sweat rolling off our faces and our overworked bodies, we must have taken this photo at some point during the training camp.
I tried to smile... my face hurting too badly as I caressed the frame and sat it in my lap.
Goddamnit.
I can't even smile. I can't even say thank you. I can't even do anything.
"He sent it to me by accident one night. I never got around to deleting the message and, well... Well, I thought you'd like something stupid like that. Girls like stupid things like that. Right?" He sighed, moving to sit beside me before lazily laying his head on my shoulder.
T-H-A-N-K-S
"I told you not to thank me. Just get out of this damn bed and come back to school and that'll be your way of repaying me. Until then- you can start repaying me by shutting up." He sighed, snuggling into my side before kicking his shoes off and heavily sighing. I could feel his eyelids fluttering against my aching skin.
Even something as small as eyelashes make my skin ache as if I had a fever.
Why am I so weak.
"You and Deku... always had a thing for throwing yourselves in front of danger. That must be why you two like each other so much. Just two stupid idiots. You're gonna get yourselves killed one day, ya know that?" He was grumbling, his exhaustion evident through his mumbled words. "Whatever... I'll be the number one hero by then so I guess I'll just save you guys like I save everyone else. So annoying... Not only do I have to keep the world safe, but I have to watch after you two? Pathetic." He scoffed.
S-O-F-T
"I am not getting soft. I don't care if you look like shit, all laid up in this hospital bed... as soon as you're back at UA, I'll kick your ass. You can count on that," He hummed, his breathing beginning to slow as he began to fall slack beside me. "To kick your ass..." he mumbled. "I'll always be there to kick your ass."
T-H-A-N-K-S
I'm not sure how long I laid there... How much time I spent laying there staring out the window as Bakugo slept beside me. He seemed quiet enough for my liking, his exhausted body leaning against mine and softly moving with every breath. He twitched a lot... sometimes his hands would squeeze my arm or he would elbow my torso and I would have to bite down on my lip and throw my head back to keep from whimpering in pain and waking him up. He mumbled about odd things... yet they all seemed to be about All Might and winning some sort of fight.
Something else was going on with him... something he wasn't telling me. I wasn't sure he would ever tell me, nor did I think I could help him even if he did.
I can't even speak. I haven't even tried walking on my own.
Let alone trying to take care of another person.
Suddenly, as the sun began to set and I felt myself beginning to drift off, Bakugo stirred from beside me. He groaned, wiping drool from his mouth before throwing his arms over his head and stretching. He sighed, relaxing beside me before chuckling and glancing up at me with a devious smirk playing at his lips. "I haven't slept that long since before those damn bastards kidnapped us."
I wanted to say that was what I believed to be- two whole weeks ago. I wanted to mention that he had only slept just a few hours. Wanted to ask him why he wasn't sleeping. But... I was just left looking out the window as he hummed from beside me and shifted so he could see what I was watching.
"Try to say something," He whispered, putting his hands behind his head as he continued to stare out the window with me. "I won't say anything bad," He grunted. "Just try."
I hummed, my nose twitching as I felt my throat suddenly begin to anxiously close up. I glanced down at him and he looked up innocently, raising his eyebrows as he waited for me. I shook my head, sighing as I looked back out the window. "You've always been stubborn," He sighed.
"I should go," He murmured, popping his back as he stood up and trudged his way over to his backpack. He groaned tiredly, leaning down before slipping his backpack over his shoulder and glancing over at me. "That old hag of mine... said she hopes you get better. She said something about seeing you soon, I don't know. I don't pay much attention to her." He huffed, turning to make his way for the door before he stopped, glancing over his shoulder as he placed his hand on the doorknob.
"I'll uh... be back tomorrow or something. Don't do any stupid shit until I get back," He huffed, closing the door behind him as I was left in silence once again.
I feel so tired.
I feel so tired that I can't even reach over to press the button to call my father back into the room. I wonder if he's as tired of this hospital as I am... I wonder if he wants to go home as much as I do.
Maybe... maybe he doesn't want to be here with me.
Maybe none of them do.
Am I forcing them to be here? Forcing these people to stand beside me because I'm convinced that they actually do- and they're just too kind to tell me off and walk away?
No...
Bakugo would have left a long time ago... But my father and Izuku?
They're too sweet. They would never.
I sighed, closing my sore eyes as I leaned back against the warmth of the bed.
If I try hard enough... I can imagine I'm back at home. I can imagine I'm laying in that bed that's three times the size of me with blankets made of a kind of warmth I never knew existed. Maybe if I reach over Izuku will be lazily strung out across the pillows with his nose in some stupid fantasy book. One of princes and princesses... fairytales and happy endings. Dragon's and-
"Asami?"
Izuku.
I shot up, wincing and squeezing my eyes in pain before quickly snapping them open to find him staring back at me.
He was hanging onto an IV stand, wearing some old tattered hoodie and a pair of sweatpants that hung loosely off his body. His hair was messy, obvious bedhead by the way it was all pushed to one side. His eyes hung low, dark circles and clear exhaustion at the way he struggled to keep his eyes open. His lip quivered and quickly he bit down on it, forcing his wet eyes to stare back at me.
He stumbled on his feet. Dragging them on the ground as he called out to me and almost tripped on the wire holding him to the IV stand.
I whined, digging my fingers into the mattress below me as I tried to push myself up. I grabbed the railing on either side of me, gasping as I swung my legs over the edge. A machine went off and immediately, I watched a wire snap out from under a bandage attached to my wrist, and another from my ankle.
"Asami! Stop trying to move!" I threw myself onto my feet and almost immediately, lost my balance as I listened to another wire snap from my bicep. Immediately, a pair of arms that were much bigger than my own, wrapped around me and held me tightly. Instantly, he buried his face into my neck as the two of us collapsed to the ground in his fit of sobs.
His shoulders were shaking horribly, rocking back and forth as he stroked the back of my hair, his tears soaking my shoulder and my neck. "Tell me you're alive. Tell me you're real," He choked out, grabbing at my sides as he begged me to be closer. "Asami... baby, please tell me I'm not dreaming anymore. Please," He sobbed. "I can't- you were... I-"
"I'm here," My voice sounded disgusting, barely even above a whisper. I wasn't even sure if he could understand me, let alone hear me.
"Say it again," He whispered. "Please."
"I'm... right here." He pulled me into his lap, digging his fingers into the roots of my hair as he rocked me, pressing kisses of hello into my neck as he continued to cry. "I'm here."
"I'm so sorry I left you. I tried- I tried to go back for you but Kacchan, he wouldn't let me. I begged them. When I stopped feeling you, I just- I-" He was out of breath, the two of us staring at each other as he pulled back to glance me over. "I'm so sorry."
He's the only person who didn't seem scared of the way I looked.
"Oh god," His lip shook, stroking his hand down the side of my face as his eyes darted between my own. He looked so tired, utterly exhausted. "Baby..."
He pulled me in, pressing a kiss to my forehead before pulling away to look me in the eyes once more. His lips were so close to mine and I looked between his lips and his eyes, trying to decide what I was feeling.
"I love you," He whispered, pulling his lips to mine as he kissed me passionately and softly. The kind of kiss where I can't tell if it's him or cotton candy.
He pulled away, his eyebrows furrowed at me. He bit down on his lip again before pulling me back in for another kiss. This time, a deeper kiss. "Asami... what's wrong? Hey... Why aren't you kissing me back?" He sounded so broken, his voice cracking once more as rubbed his thumb along my cheek. "Why didn't you say you love me back?"
Tears silently fell down his cheeks at an increasing speed, his eyes darting between mine furiously as he softly held my face in his calloused, yet soft hands. He began to shake, his fingers quickly trembling against my face as his nose twitched and his lip quivered. "Why didn't you say you-"
Slowly, I grabbed his wrists and pulled his hands from my face, my right eye beginning to burn with the familiar sense of hot tears. I sniffled, trying to force myself to not cry or else I wouldn't be able to say the last few sets of words I had left in me.
He shook his head, squeezing his eyelids shut and forcing the tears from his eyes as he forced down a pained whine in the back of his throat. He sniffled, slowly opening his eyes as he stared up at me. Begging me to just give him a few more minutes of myself to him before I took away everything he'd ever wanted.
Everything we... had ever wanted.
"I hate you."