IT HAD BEEN three days since Ava had confronted her in the school hallway. The blonde had kept her distance but that hadn't stopped her from sending warning glances at Zara every time some other person was not in the vicinity.
Safe to say, Zara was on the edge of her seat. She hadn't told anyone about her warning.
She was giving Ava the benefit of doubt. She didn't want to jump too quickly to any conclusion.
Thursday evening when she entered the house alongside her brothers with the intention of dashing straight to her room and relaxing before work, she hadn't expected to be stopped by Sal.
"Zara." He called from what she presumed was the living room. She paused on the bottom step and gave Tino a questioning look. He only shrugged in return, kissed her nose and ran up the stairs.
She sighed and turned around, trotting towards the living room to see what he wanted. She was sure she hadn't done anything wrong. Or if she had, she didn't remember it. She racked her brain for an answer but there was no response.
Useless piece of soft tissues and blood vessels.
She entered the large room and found Sal with three unfamiliar people. She mentally glared at Sal. Couldn't he have given her a warning that she would be meeting strangers so she could somewhat mentally prepare herself? No, he just had to be quiet and now she would most likely be awkward.
Fantastic.
"Yes, Sal?" She questioned, completely ignoring the three other presence in the room. They wouldn't exist for her until Sal introduced them, if he planned to, that is.
"Sit down." He gestured to the space on the couch beside him. If it had been anyone other than him, Leo or Dele, she would have sat down anywhere but there just to spite them. Alas, she wouldn't be doing that to her eldest brother.
She sat down beside him after slipping her bag off her shoulder and placing it on her lap. She gave him a questioning look and he spoke.
"I would like you to meet some people." He gestured to the three who were staring at her intently. If they didn't quit staring within the next two minutes, she was throwing hands. "This is Elijah, one of the most important in our mafia and my friend. Overlooks all the work in our absence."
Elijah was a tall guy much like her brothers (big surprise there). He must have stood at a good 6'3" with broad shoulders and tousled hair. His skin was dark- darker than her brothers but his eyes were bright. She would have surely been intimidated by him if he wasn't giving her such a warm smile.
"Hello, Zara. Welcome home." He said and gave her a quick, friendly hug. So he was that close to the family. Got it.
"You too." She muttered distractedly but then realised what she had said. You too? You too? Fuck. Excuse her while she permanently moves to the south pole to live with her little black and white friends so she doesn't have to face another human ever again.
He laughed and broke their embrace, "You are as awkward as Tino claimed you were."
Her eyes narrowed on their own accord, "Tino has been spreading some pretty nice things about me. I must have a talk with him."
He chuckled and patted her head, "Don't worry. He told us everything good and awkward about you. I am pretty sure all the men in our headquarters know by now that you are very intelligent, your baking is the best, you are scared of horror movies and that you love ice cream."
An unexpected laugh left her lips. Tino was acting like such a soccer mom who boasted about their kids to other soccer moms and made sure they knew everything about their child. And the thought was funny to her. Maybe Tino was the second Leo.
Sal's eyes shone with amusement for a second before it vanished. The can't-show-even-the-slightest-sign-of-weakness-in-front-of-others trope was on for him.
He gained their attention again and nodded to the second guy who was standing straight at the end of the opposite couch, "This is Mason. One of our men. Sometimes assists Elijah with work."
Mason gave her a nod and she nodded in return. So he wasn't very close. Noted.
"And this is Xavier. One of our men and now your tutor." He said as he nodded to the last guy sitting on the couch. He looked in his early twenties and was dressed the most casually in a tee and jeans while an easy smile rested on his lips, making his eyes crinkle.
She turned to Sal, confused, "A tutor?" She had all her homework done- even the next week's one- and they had seen her previous report cards. Did they think she would not be able to manage her studies now? Why did she need a tutor? Had they gotten a call-
"He'll be teaching you Italian," Sal informed her, breaking her train of thoughts. She blinked as his words took a second to register. Italian?
"Uh I don't know why I need to-"
"Because it is our first language and you should know it."
"Excuse me," She raised a hand, "But my first language is French. Then Turkish since my late grandma was Turkish and mama wanted me to know the language. Then English. And then maybe Italian." She clarified.
He raised an eyebrow, "Dad's first language is Italian. Our mafia is the Italian mafia. So it is technically our first language."
"No. It is your first language. It's my fourth language. And before I moved to the States, I used to speak horrible English because I only ever knew French or Turkish. We have different upbringings, Sal."
He mused, "Clearly. But this doesn't eliminate the fact that Italian is important for you to learn. Maybe we should get you an English tutor as well?" He suggested.
"No." She looked at him incredulously, "I improved on my own since then. That was four years ago." There were still times when she had difficulty reading a completely new word but that was normal.
"If you say so. But you need to learn Italian. And Xavier would guide you through it." Sal informed.
She nodded. She could learn it on her own but it would be better to have someone to guide her through it. Learning a language wasn't easy.
Sal stood up in one fluid motion and adjusted his coat, "I have a meeting to get to. Leo would be home in a while. You can discuss the timings with Xavier." He informed, placed a swift kiss on her head and moved towards the door. Elijah gave her one last smile and then left behind him along with Mason.
She looked towards Xavier who had already taken out his journal, probably setting their schedule up. He gave her a smile, "So when would you like to learn?"
She passed him a small smile as well, "I am not the teacher. You are. You should state your timings first." Respect for teachers was very high on her list of morals. They dedicate their time and efforts to provide others with knowledge. There were some nasty exceptions but luckily, she hadn't encountered many of those in her life.
He raised his brows and then chuckled, "I have orders to schedule the meetings in a way that would be comfortable for you. So I think you should have the first say."
Zara mentally rolled her eyes. Not everything revolved around them. Well, maybe it revolved around her brothers but not her. She took others' thoughts into consideration before expressing her own. She couldn't just dish out some timings.
"When are you free?" She asked him. He must be a busy man, having dozen other tasks to attend to.
He realised she wasn't going to budge, "Well, I am free from two to six on alternate days. Weekends are mostly free for me."
She nodded, "I get off school at two. Then I get to work a little after five. Saturday is totally free for me." She informed.
He considered this, "How about this? I teach you every Monday, Wednesday and Saturday. We can schedule long sessions on Saturday and three to half-past four on other days. Sounds good?"
She nodded. She could manage that. This way she wouldn't be late for work and have enough time to have lunch. It worked for her.
"Sounds good. Today is Thursday. I guess the day after tomorrow would be my first lesson. You will be teaching me here?"
"Yes."
"Then what do I need to have? Any book or something?" She still remembered her young days when her mother would teach her Turkish. She used to have these beautiful small books that contained short, moral stories. Those were the fun times. Giggling over the wrong pronunciation and then debating over the story in Turkish.
He chuckled and stood up, "You don't need to worry about that. I'll take care of it."
He extended his hand for a shake and she returned a firm one, "Oh and nice hair, Zara. I'll see you tomorrow."
And then he turned and exited the room with his bag in his left hand.
~
"Pumpkin, I have been letting you off the hook this whole time but this is getting ridiculous. You need to eat more." Leo frowned looking at her plate which consisted of a very small portion of lasagna and some beans that she had already eaten- or more accurately, her hedgehog had already eaten.
Before Leo had spoken, she was simply playing with her food while sneakily feeding Nugget her greens, hoping they would all leave and she wouldn't have to eat anything. Nug, her sweet baby, was happy to eat. He loved his beans.
But for her, just looking at the food was nauseating.
But he had spoken. And successfully gained everyone's attention. Damn it.
She innocently looked up, "What are you talking about? I have already eaten most of mine."
He gave her a deadpan look, "We were served dinner less than three minutes ago."
It had only been three minutes? She was so lost in her own thoughts that she had assumed at least fifteen minutes must have passed. Just when she needed time to slow down, it increased its pace. And when she needed it to go fast, it slowed down. Just her luck.
"Uh," She cleared her throat, trying to shake away the feeling of all their eyes on her. At least papa wasn't here, she reassured herself, "I actually ate at the bakery before leaving. So I am not that hungry."
Bullshit. She loved baking but she didn't prefer having anything remotely sweet. Ice cream was her only exception.
"Don't give me that crap." He cut her off, already used to her lying. He had learned that with Zara, it was a constant game of two lies and one truth- if they were lucky enough to extract that truth. The only way to dodge her lies was to go with his gut instinct.
"I know you purposefully miss breakfast every day by coming down late, proceed to grab an apple or a breakfast bar before leaving, tell me that you eat from the cafeteria while telling your brothers you have lunch, then come home and eat bare minimum. Then you go to work for hours and come home to eat that amount." He pointed at her plate with his fork while his lips were pursed in disappointment.
Her eyes widened and so did her brothers who whirled to her in question. Even Nug realised the severity of the situation and inched closer to Zara. Oh fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. How did he know?
Being as observant as her, she sometimes forgot that others could be observant too. Especially her brothers who liked to take notes of everything she did. Fuck her life.
"W-what are you talking about?" She hated the way her voice quivered slightly. She was usually a good liar but it was difficult lying to her elder brothers and papa. They fixed you with a stare that warned you to speak the truth.
"Is it true?" Sal questioned, turning to Leo.
He nodded gravely, "I have been noticing this for a week now. Just hoping she would come around."
Shit. Her cover was blown.
"Zara, you shouldn't lie to us." Dele's disappointed voice spoke from beside her and her heart sank to her stomach.
"I don't-" She tried to lie again but Leo cut her off.
"Don't lie, tesoro. You weren't the most sneakiest while skipping your meals."
"How is she living?" Sil muttered, looking at her. If her diet was as less as Leo claimed, he was surprised she was able to do all the stuff she did.
She gulped, pulling Nugget to her lap, more for her comfort than the animal's, "My eating habits are my concern. I am not a child. I can look after myself."
"And you have been doing such a good job. Cutting off your food like that. So mature." Ben retorted and she glared at him.
"My maturity is not measured by how much I eat, dumbass." She snapped.
"Don't curse. You are already treading on thin ice here." Sal said with a frown.
"Why am I treading on thin ice?" She asked with a furrow of her brows.
"Lying about eating lunch. If your brothers are letting you eat somewhere other than with them, they are trusting you to have your lunch. If you tell Leo that you eat from the cafeteria, he is trusting you as well. You are abusing their trust."
Her jaw ticked in irritation, even as she knew how true his words were. But she had never been the one to back down, "I wouldn't have to lie if everyone wasn't so concerned about something so trivial. What I eat and what I don't is my concern. Not eating is not illegal."
He shook his head, "It is our concern. I don't know what you wish to achieve by skipping meals but it doesn't help. You are only damaging your body this way. Its effects might not appear now, but in the long term, it will only cause you harm. Nothing good."
"I don't wish to achieve anything." She declined, "And this is not a discussion we are having right now. Or ever."
"We are having this discussion." Dele interjected, surprising her, "This is something we need to talk about. I know I told you that it is impossible to start eating immediately but I didn't mean that you could continue this diet. It's not benefitting anyone."
She sighed, "It isn't like I willingly eat less. I eat as much as I can stomach." She muttered in her defence.
"Are you anorexic?" Raph questioned something that was a faint whisper at the end of everyone's mind. He never hesitated to ask any such question but even he was afraid of the answer this time.
They all turned to her, a silent plead on their faces for her to say no. And she did so.
"No. No, of course not." She immediately declined, "That's ridiculous. Me? Anorexic? Nope."
"You are acting awfully defensive," Tino remarked from beside her.
She shook her head, "I am not lying. I am not anorexic. Never have been. I just.. just can't eat. I can't explain. Eating is a chore I do as much as I can."
Leo assessed her for a moment and then exhaled, "I don't think she is lying about the anorexia part. But surely a person can't survive on that diet willingly."
She sighed, "I just can't eat. This has been my diet for years now. And I am living, ain't I?"
Ben frowned, "So this was your diet when mom was alive?" Trust him to ask a question like that.
She gulped, ready to lie again, but one look from him told her to answer truthfully. She hesitantly responded, "There wasn't an exact day I just stopped eating. Gradually this became my diet. Now it's hard to imagine a time where I used to eat more than that." She answered vaguely.
"Surely you must remember the time around which it happened." He prompted.
She harshly bit on her lip, her fidgeting fingers tapping a random beat on her knee. She was feeling trapped again. Trapped under all these questions, "I don't know. Maybe at twelve? Thirteen? I don't remember." She really didn't.
A crease appeared between Sal's brows, "And you have no idea what might have caused it?"
When she only shrugged, they all turned to Dele who was looking at her. He looked up when he felt all the eyes on him and answered hesitantly, "There are many causes for appetite loss. Anorexia-"
"Which I don't have."
"-diabetes-"
"Nope."
"-COPD or asthma-"
"Nuh-uh."
"-alcohol or drugs-"
"Nah."
"-cancer-"
"Woah woah, we getting too serious here."
"-anxiety-"
"I specialise in giving others anxiety, not having it."
"-or depression." He finished, looking at her.
She immediately shook her head, "Nope. I am clean. Guess I was just born with a smaller stomach than the rest." She chuckled nervously.
When they continued looking at her in worry, she picked up her fork and shoved a bite in her mouth, forcing her throat to swallow it whole, "See, I am eating. Let's forget this conversation ever happened."
She finished her food in record time, bid everyone a good night and dashed upstairs with Nugget tailing her to puke all the food out. She can't stomach all that food. No matter how hard she tried. It was a miracle she managed to stuff it all in in the first place.
They watched her go and Leo sighed, "She is just going to throw it all up, isn't she?"
"Yes," Dele answered honestly.
"Maybe we should consult a dietician," Tino suggested.
Sil scoffed, "Good luck convincing her to cooperate."
"Why do you think she lost her appetite so suddenly?" Sal questioned Dele, wanting his opinions on the matter.
The boy lightly shrugged, "I can't say for sure this soon. Something obviously happened in her past that affected her a lot. We don't know what it is and we won't ever push her for the answers. We can only guess but saying for sure is near about impossible as of now." He admitted.
They considered his words and nodded. The only wish echoing in their minds was that no matter what had happened, she had the courage in her heart to move past it if she hasn't yet. And that she would let them help her because they were her brothers and they would always be there to listen, to help.
She was their sister- their responsibility- and the lengths they would go for her couldn't even be put into words.