You make it back in no time and with no incidents, opening the door and stepping through. The boys all jump up, looking at you expectantly, but you simply shake your head in response. Lowering your head and avoiding their eyes, you reach down and set your knife on the table, blinking back tears. Silently, Jungkook leans over and places the gun on the table, and a flash of red catches your eye. Startled, you look again, glimpsing his wounded arm. In all the chaos, you had completely forgotten his injury from your first encounter with a zombie. Claw marks stretch up his forearm, where fingernails grazed and broke the skin. Blood still leaks slowly from the torn flesh, staining his wrist and hand.
You gasp softly, an unknown emotion bubbling up in your chest. Instinctively, you reach out, gently taking his hand.
"Come with me" you say, turning and pulling him towards the bathroom. He doesn't argue, simply following you as you guide him down a hallway, eventually turning into the small bathroom. You turn on the water, opening a small closet as you wait for the water to warm up. Pulling out a small first aide kid, you turn back to him. He's watching you curiously, realization dawning as he spots the small box in your hands.
"You have a first aide kit?" He asks.
"My parents got it for me. They were really freaked out about me moving here, and I guess they thought it was a good idea for me to at least have this" you shrug. A stab of worry pierces your heart as you think of your parents.
You can't think of them now. You have to focus, y/n. Think about them later.
You shake your heard, clearing your thoughts as you open the first aide kit and begin rifling through the various objects inside. Glancing up, you see Jungkook, still watching you. Your gazes lock, and your heartbeat quickens inexplicably. Clearing your throat, you look away, checking the water, making sure it's warm but not too hot.
"Ok, put your arm in the water. It'll probably sting at first, but we need to clean it" you say matter-of-factly. Wordlessly, he obeys, slowly submerging his arm in the running water. A hiss escapes from between his gritted teeth, but he keeps his arm under. The water turns red, wiping away both the dried and fresh blood from his injury. When the water runs clear again, you turn it off, taking Junkook's arm and gently drying it with a clean towel. Working silently, you remove the towel and spread a thin layer of ointment.
The air is heavy, something you can't identify stirring between you and Jungkook, causing shivers to run up and down your spine. A blush creeps across your cheeks unbidden.
Why am I blushing? This man is so frustrating and he doesn't make sense. So why are my cheeks so hot? And why is my heart beating so fast?
No matter how badly you want to be done and out of this confusing environment, time stretches as you patch Jungkook up. It feels as though you have spent an eternity in this bathroom. You avoid those cavernous, dark eyes as you finally finish up, securing the bandages now snuggly wrapped around his arm. He has not said a word, still simply watching you.
"Ok well...that's it. It should be ok, as long as we keep washing it and changing the bandages. I'm sorry it took so long to take care of it. I'm going to go back and check on the others" you say, voice coming out much squeakier than you intended. Before he can say anything, you turn, scurrying out the door.
Back out in the safety of the hallway, you collapse against the nearest wall, leaning your head back and exhaling. Placing your hands on your cheeks, you try desperately to cool them down.
Hearing the doorknob to the bathroom jiggle, you jump, quickly hurrying away, heading for the safety of the living room. Emerging from the hall, the boys spot you and abruptly stop talking. You look around, curiosity brimming.
"What?" You ask when no one says anything.
"Nothing, we were just wondering how Kook is doing. Where did you take him?" Jimin asks, and you're not sure if you're simply imagining the slight teasing tone of his voice. Before you can respond, Jungkook appears behind you, holding up his arm to show the fresh bandages.
"Y/n has a first aide kit, so she cleaned off the cuts and mummified me" he jokes lightly, bumping you playfully as he passes you to take a seat in the living room. You stare at him, baffled by his sudden light-hearted behavior.
Now he's joking with me? When has he ever joked around with me? Your head spins even as your heart flutters, frustrating you further.
"Ok everyone, we made it here. Saying we've been through a lot today would be the understatement of the year. I think we should all try and get some sleep. Y/n, do you have blankets we can spread on the ground?" Namjoon asks, providing you a much needed reprieve from your thoughts. You nod, moving to a nearby closet and pulling out several blankets and extra pillows as Taehyung and Jimin move the coffee table to make room on the ground.
"I'm sorry there isn't more space or comfortable places to sleep. A couple of you should take my bed, and I can sleep on the ground" you say, a slight twinge of guilt going through you at the thought of sleeping in your bed while they sleep on the hard floor.
Jin waves his hand dismissively. "No no, we're fine. There's room for at least two on the couch, and there are plenty of blankets and pillows. Really, we're good."
"We're grateful to have a safe place to stay. Thank you, y/n" Taehyung chimes in, giving you that big, boxy smile.
"Ok, well...I'm glad you're all here. I don't know where I'd be without you, truly." You pause, emotion thickening your voice as the weight of the day hangs in the air. There are so many things you want to say to them, but you don't. Instead, you say "please let me know if there's anything else you need." Turning, you head back down the hallway, shutting the door behind you as you step into your room.
***
Rolling over, you stare glumly at the clock on your bedside table. 2 a.m. You groan, rolling back and rubbing your tired eyes. Your body is apparently determined to stay up, no matter how exhausted you are. Kicking away your blankets, you stand up, heading for the door.
You tiptoe down the hallway and into the living room, eyeing the door to the balcony on the far side of the room, sighing when you realize how difficult it'll be to cross the sea of boys splayed out on your living room floor. Venturing out, you move slowly, careful not to step on any of the snoring men cuddled up on the ground. Finally reaching the other side, you fist bump the air, congratulating yourself on your victory.
Stepping outside, you're immediately met with a pleasant, cool breeze dancing across your cheeks and lifting your hair. Moonlight streams down, silver beams fighting back the shadows. Seeing the stars twinkling above, your heart feels slightly lighter.
The moment of elation is all too brief, your stomach dropping as you realize you're not alone out on this balcony.
Oh no.
Hearing the sound of the door, the ebony-haired man turns. He's seated in one of your deck chairs, overlooking the city. He looks at you inquisitively, no doubt wondering why you're coming out to the balcony in the middle of the night.
Of course he's here. Why, of all people, does he have to be here, right now? You had hoped to avoid any more confusing, one-on-one time with the maknae, but here you are, somehow finding him alone on a moonlit balcony.
"Hey. What are you doing here? Why are you up?" You ask him, questions sounding a little more accusatory than you had meant them to.
"I could ask you the same thing" he chuckles, leaning back in his seat.
You sigh, knowing you can't just turn around and walk back through the door. Accepting your fate, you take a few steps forward, plopping down on the seat next him. There's a beat of silence.
"You couldn't sleep either I take it?" He asks, glancing over at you.
"No, just kept tossing and turning. I don't know why" you reply, still looking straight ahead.
More silence.
"Hey...I'm really sorry about Mi Young" he says softly, surprising you. You look over at him, and see the sincerity of his words reflected in his eyes. "I know its hard, but try not to worry too much. I'm sure she's out there somewhere, safe. I bet she did what you did and stuck with a group of people" he continues and your throat tightens, eyes pricking as you glance away. You're taken aback by yet another facet of Jungkook: his kindness. It's unexpected, and the warmth of his words spreads through you.
"Thank you" is all you can manage, coming out as barely a whisper. He looks at you a moment longer, as if he were deciding whether or not to say something. Seeming to decide against it, he simply nods, turning his attention back to the stars above.
More silence, but it's changed, somehow. It's a comfortable, almost familiar, silence. You're not sure how much time has passed before one of you speaks again.
"Hey...can I ask you something?" You say hesitantly. He murmurs indistinctly, looking back at you, waiting for whatever it is you want to ask.
"Why did you give me your knife?"
"I don't know, I wanted you to have it. Like I said, I've been training and I thought it would be better if you had the weapon" he shrugs, but you notice that he's not meeting your eyes. You don't press him, simply taking in his answer.
Does he think I'm weak? Is that why he gave me his knife? Why he's protected me at every turn? Or worse, does he think I'll mess things up so bad that I put everyone else in danger?
Your heart sinks, the realization stinging more than you thought it could. It made sense. Why else would he do what he did?
You sniff, looking away, up at the stars, hoping he doesn't notice your change in mood.
As if he can read your thoughts, he speaks, so quietly you almost miss it. "Thank you...for coming back for me. When I was behind everyone. And for distracting that very first zombie, in the stairwell. You didn't have to do any of that, but you did, even though it put you at risk. So...thank you. It was very brave of you."
Wondering if he really can read your mind, you look at him, surprised and touched by his words. You don't know what to say. What is this man doing to me?
Jungkook shifts in his chair, clearly uncomfortable by his own honesty and your lack of response. He clears his throat, not looking at you. "I mean even though you ran into me, again. That was pretty dumb. But besides that, it was all quite brave."
You snort, shattering the discomfort, feeling yourself relax ever so slightly. "Excuse me, you ran into me. Get it right." Jungkook seems to relax too, flashing a cute bunny smile at you as he says "whatever, it was still your fault." You punch his arm lightly, chuckling.
"Hey, I have another question." You say, thinking of something that's been lingering in your head for awhile. He looks at you expectantly. You pause, unsure of what he'll say. "Why did you insist on going to find Mi Young? Back at the Big Hit building. Everyone had already decided we shouldn't go. Why did you push for it? You don't even really know Mi Young."
Jungkook looks taken aback by the question. He thinks about for a moment, looking straight ahead.
"Well...all I know is if my hyungs were out there, and I didn't know where they were or if they were ok, I wouldn't stop trying to find them. And I wouldn't want a group of people telling me that I couldn't, that they wouldn't help. I think now we all need to help each other more than ever." He pauses. "And I knew it was important to you. So I thought we should go."
He falls silent as he turns his gaze back to you. You flush at his words. You weren't sure what you were expecting, but it wasn't that.
"Well...thank you. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't convinced everyone else to go." More silence. "Oh and thank you for saving my life. Back on the steps, with the gun. I thought it was over. So...thank you." You shift uncomfortably. "Wow I guess I could say thank you for a million things at this point, huh?"
He laughs, and the sound sends your heart skipping, much to your chagrin.
"I could say the same, I was just about to thank you for bandaging my arm. Lets just call it even, one big thank you for everything. Deal?" He extends his hand. You smile, taking it in yours and shaking it.
"Deal"
He smiles again, leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes. You study him, the curve of his nose, his round cheeks sloping down to meet a sharp jawline. In the stillness, you see a softness to him, and you find yourself wondering how you ever disliked him so much.
Leaning back, you close your eyes too, exhaustion finally settling in.
You stay like this until the sun breaks on the horizon, engulfing the world in cascading orange and pink flames.
A/N
Kinda long chapter, but I was really into this one. They all honestly just need all the sleep. Hope you all are enjoying the story so far! Big stuff coming - I have so many ideas bouncing around my head, and I'm so excited.
- m.