MASK ON
— 12. Morally Grey
About an hour had passed. Alex and Marcus were still in the locker room, sitting on the ground as they poured out their hearts to each other. Alex didn't know why but she found herself telling Marcus things she hadn't told anyone. She just felt comfortable around him. She couldn't explain it.
All the while, she was in just a bra and underwear. Not that either of them cared. Marcus had been right. It was nothing he hadn't seen before.
"It's so annoying. Everyone thinks I'm this confident badass that doesn't care about anything, but I do. I do care. More than they could ever know. I just bottle up and it always explodes at all the wrong times. Last time it happened, I literally shot a gun at a portrait of my step-dad and my mom. I smashed that thing so much and by the end of my tantrum, my mom had to get me stitches because I had stepped in so much glass and hadn't even realized it," She explained and Marcus listened to her closely.
"A gun?" He questioned, wondering why she'd be able to hold a gun and her mother did nothing about it.
"Don't ask," Alex told him and Marcus smiled since it was something she said often.
Don't ask.
It's fine, it's whatever.
If Marcus had a dollar for every time Alex said either of those things, he'd be a millionaire within a month.
"You and your step-dad didn't get along?" He asked and Alex's smile faded at the mention of Kenny.
"Understatement," She replied, rolling her eyes at the thought, "Let's just say when I learned of his death, I threw a big ass party at his house and invited my whole school and ended up spending the night in jail. My mom let me stay there, too, to teach me a lesson."
"Why'd you hate him?" Marcus asked and Alex turned to him, smiling sadly.
She stared down at him for a long moment. She had told no one but her mother about Kenny. Was it wise to tell Marcus? She barely even knew him. Despite that, though, she felt as though she had known him for years.
"He, uh, beat me and..." She trailed off, sighing as she looked downwards, "And other stuff."
"Other stuff?" Marcus frowned and Alex didn't say a word, only gestured downwards, "And you didn't tell anyone?"
"He died. That gave me enough comfort to last me a lifetime," She told him, letting out a large sigh, "But sometimes I wish he was still alive, so I could kill himself myself."
Just then, Alex froze. She turned to him, a part of her feeling afraid he'd realize she was being totally serious. He didn't, though. He simply stared at her, listening to everything she said without a single ouch of judgment in his expression.
"Shit," Alex spoke up, laughing humorlessly as she ran her hair through her damp hair, "The stuff that goes through my mind sometimes even scares me."
"What is going through your mind?" Marcus asked, smiling slightly as he crawled closer to her until he was right in front of her.
"Things that shouldn't be going through there," Alex admitted softly as she shook her head and stared deeply into his eyes, "I'm not a good person."
"From what I've seen, you are a good person," He assured her, causing her to laugh as she watched him sit back against the wall.
"You know more than most but if you knew everything, you would regret ever thinking I was a good person," Alex told her, causing Marcus to smile in response, "You'd run straight for the hills."
"Let me be the judge of that," he retorted as they both smiled, "Yeah, I get it. Wellsbury sucks."
"No, not really," Alex replied, shaking her head, "It's actually not bad. I've lived in a lot of places and this town doesn't completely suck as some other places have. This is literally the first place I've been where it's cool to be smart, and they want you to succeed."
Marcus sighed as he stared at Alex. It was only a few days ago where she was claiming she had hated Wellsbury. What made that change?
"They want you to fit into a neat, little, predetermined box," He complained as Alex sighed in response, "If you don't take seven AP classes, they label you a problem, put you on Adderall and Klonopin until you join the ski team."
"Ski team, huh?" She asked him as she smiled in amusement, "Well, from what I can see you have a mom and dad that love you very much, a nice house in a nice neighborhood, and the chance to achieve your greatest dreams. Check your privilege, dude, and be grateful. Not everyone has that. I've had to fight for everything I have and I've known what it is to share a single room with my sister and my mother, not knowing when my next meal would be. If your biggest problem is the ski team—"
"So you're saying since I live in Wellsbury, I don't have any valid problems?" Marcus asked, giving her a puzzled look.
"I never said that," Alex argued, shaking her head.
"You basically did," He retorted and Alex sighed in response. There was a moment of silence between them and after a moment, Marcus finally brought himself to look Alex in the eyes.
Alex stared at him closely, noticing the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. Did she say something to hurt him? She hadn't meant to.
"My, uh...best friend died last year," He admitted, causing Alex's eyes to widen in shock, "He uh...He got cancer."
"I'm sorry," She told him, feeling guilty about what she had said just moments before. She didn't know what the hell was wrong with her. When did she become the judgemental type? Her mother taught her better than that.
"It's fine," He told her, looking as though he was about to cry.
"It doesn't sound fine and you don't look fine, either," She replied and Marcus shrugged his shoulders.
"The two of us and Kaden were best friends but when things got tough, Kaden ditched us and I was left to deal with it all alone. When he died, I had to grieve alone too. It was shitty and while Kaden likes to act like what he did wasn't wrong, I won't. It was screwed up and I'll never forgive him for that. Our friend needed us and Kaden left," He explained and Alex sighed at the mention of Kaden. He sighed sadly, quick to wipe his tear, "But whatever. Everyone has shit, right? Some more than others."
"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked and Marcus smiled sadly as he shook his head.
"You wanna talk about yours?" He retorted, leading to Alex shaking her head as well, "Then that settles it," He replied, quick to stand up from his seat on the ground, "Damn, this just got heavy. Maybe we just need to chill out."
Alex frowned at Marcus's words, only to have her eyes widen when she saw him reaching for the shower handle. "No, no, don't!" She pleaded, trying to slap his hands away.
"What?" He asked, the two of them laughing as he attempted to reach for the shower handle.
"No! Don't!" She exclaimed and Marcus grabbed her arms, keeping them raised above her head.
He stopped and looked down at Alex, who was smiling up at him. "Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked him, watching his eyes soften as he knelt in front of her.
He stared at her for a moment, glancing between her eyes and her lips. He placed a hand on the side of her neck and slowly leaned forward, Alex doing nothing to stop him. He pressed his lips against hers and the two teenagers began to kiss passionately, not caring for the consequences.
They might not have been dating anyone officially but everyone knew. Marcus was with Padma and Alex was with Kaden. Neither needed labels to know they were already spoken for, even though their relationships with those people weren't official. What they were doing was wrong but neither of them did anything to stop.
Alex did nothing to stop Marcus as he kissed her. She secured her arms around his neck and Marcus tugged her closer to him.
Just then, hearing the door open, Alex gasped and pulled away from Marcus. She quickly stood up and rushed to hide off to the side, Marcus following soon after her.
"Come on. Two seconds," The sound of her mother's voice filled her ears, causing Alex to frown.
"Really, I'm fine," Max told Georgia, leading to Alex turning to Marcus in confusion. What was Max doing there? And why was she with Georgia?
"Yeah, when I'm fine, I sob uncontrollably," Georgia retorted, earning a small smile from Alex.
"It's just..." Max trailed off, beginning to cry, "I made such a fool of myself."
"You put your heart on the line. That takes guts. Love is a lot of things, Maxine. Safe isn't one of 'em," Georgia told Max, and Alex couldn't help but smile.
She turned and looked up at Marcus, who was staring down at her. She sent him a soft smile, just before looking away.
"Your accent makes everything you say sound so convincing," Max commented, causing Marcus to roll his eyes while Alex smiled in amusement.
"Now, get out there and have fun. Ignore Riley. Indifference is the best revenge."
"Thanks. Ginny and Alex are really lucky to have you," Max told Georgia, just before leaving the locker room.
Georgia sighed and walked over to the mirror. She was making sure she looked good, only to stop when she noticed a familiar change of clothes rested on the bench behind her.
"Okay, I'd recognize those clothes anywhere, seeing as though they're mine!" Georgia called out, causing Alex's eyes to widen in alarm, "Ginny? Alex? I know I'm dealing with one of you and seeing as though it has your name written all over it, I'm sure it's you, buttercup, so show yourself while you still can. I might just get the wrong idea seeing your clothes laid out over here and think you're in here half-naked with some boy."
Alex sighed, turning to give Marcus a look that told him to stay put before she revealed herself to her mother. "Hi, Mom," She greeted her mother, smiling widely.
"Hey. What you are doing hiding in here, weirdo? Why's your hair wet and why are you half-naked?" She asked as Alex walked past her.
"Long story, but..." Alex trailed off, sighing as she looked downwards, "Could you do my hair?"
Hearing Alex's words, Georgia's eyes practically lit up like a Christmas tree. "My God! I thought you'd never ask, buttercup!" She exclaimed happily, "You haven't let me touch your hair since you were ten and insisted on doing it yourself."
"Well, then it's your lucky day, Mom," Alex replied and picked up her clothes from the bench.
Moments later, Alex found herself sitting on the bench, fully dressed as her mother sat behind her. Georgia was smiling, placing her daughter's hair in a half pony-tail. "How many times I have told you not to let anyone touch your hair?" Georgia complained and Alex sighed in defeat, "If you don't let your own mom touch your hair, no one else should get to either."
"Are you almost done?" Alex asked, feeling impatient since she knew Marcus was still hiding in the showers.
"This whole thing is some next-level rich people shit, don't you think?" Georgia asked her daughter, who smiled in response.
"Tell me about it," Alex muttered under her breath.
As he was standing near the showers, Marcus quietly laughed in amusement at the way the mother-daughter duo spoke of the night. He finally knew where Alex got her attitude and opinions from.
"I've never seen anything like it, but you look like you were enjoying yourself with Kaden. Ooh-la-la," Georgia teased her daughter and Marcus' smile immediately faded at the mention of Kaden.
"Mom!" Alex complained, an annoyed look on her face, "Please stop, you're gonna make me wanna throw up."
"Well, now you know how I felt when I saw those photo booth pics. Tell that boy to keep his hands to himself. I think I might just be sick seeing his hands anywhere near your ta-tas again."
"Ta-tas?" Alex cringed, giving her mother a weird look at the choice of words her mother used to describe her boobs, "Stop, ew."
"Ew is right. Giving me flashbacks of that Aaron dude from Freshman year. Or as I liked to call him..." Georgia trailed off, beginning to smile, "Hands."
"Hands was eighth grade," Alex corrected her and Georgia rolled her eyes.
"Same thing."
"It's not the same thing. Eighth grade is middle school, freshman year is in high school," Alex reminded her mother, who didn't seem to care.
"Well, both were filled with no good guys who didn't deserve you," Georgia complained, causing Alex to sigh in defeat.
"No, I didn't deserve them," She corrected her mother, who immediately frowned in concern.
"What are you talking about, baby?" Georgia questioned, frowning at her daughter in concern.
"You hear what Ginny says," Alex spoke softly, lowering her head in shame, "She basically says I'm a slut and the only future I have is dropping out of high school and getting pregnant like you did."
"Don't listen to her," Georgia argued, annoyed that Ginny had the audacity to say such a thing to Alex, her own sister, "She's just jealous that you have depth."
"Dad says I'm morally grey," Alex admitted, despite not knowing what it meant.
"Good, it's better than being a black and white character or a Mary Sue," Georgia pointed out and Alex turned to face her fully.
"Am I supposed to know what that means?" She asked and Georiga scoffed.
"No. I don't even know what it means. I just heard Ginny and Zion talking about it on the phone," She confessed, causing them both to laugh, "Did you and your little boyfriend do the deed yet?"
"Ew, stop. Why are we talking about this again? Do you not get enough action on your own that you want to know all about my sex life?" Alex complained and stood up from her seat on the benches.
"Come on. Spill it. I wanna know everything!" Georgia demanded, practically jumping up and down in excitement.
Alex sighed and looked toward the showers, knowing Marcus was still there. She looked back at her mother, shaking her head. "Not here. When we get home."
"Fine by me," Georgia told her, smiling as she wrapped an arm around her.
___
When morning arrived, Alex walked out of school alone but it wasn't long before Kaden joined her, smiling widely. "You disappeared like half the night. Where did you go?"
"Basically, my mom kidnapped me and wouldn't let me go," She admitted, causing Kaden to laugh in amusement.
"I'm not surprised," Kaden replied, smiling down at her, "You two act more like friends than mother and daughter."
"That's how it's always been," Alex shrugged as she stared up at him, "And Ginny's always been the thorn in my side. God, why does she always have to be so bratty?"
"Maybe she feels left out," He pointed out, causing Alex to scoff.
"She's left out because of her brattiness," She retorted, rolling her eyes at the thought.
"That didn't totally suck," Alex could hear Press comment as she and Kaden reached him, Ginny, Max, and Hunter.
"Are you kidding?" Hunter asked, letting out a large scoff, "That was lit! Best night ever!"
"Yes!" Max exclaimed, despite it being a lie, "The best."
"Mine was eventful," Alex muttered under her breath as she turned to see Marcus from afar, standing alone.
"Is that a burrito?" Max asked Hunter, snatching the food from him, "Huh. Yeah, I'll take that."
Just then, the group turned, watching Abby stumbling past them with the help of Norah, clearly drunk out of her mind.
"Woah! Abby, are you okay?" Max asked, wasting no time walking over to her friends.
"Yeah, and that's our cue," Alex announced, grabbing Kaden before she began to lead him away.
"Wait, Alex," Kaden insisted and Alex slowly turned to face him, "Tonight was fun, especially since you were there. And there's something I wanted to ask you," He paused, and Alex began to smile since she knew what he was getting at, "You're smart, funny, pretty, and not afraid to speak your much and call people out on their BS, which is probably what I like most about you."
"Not the pretty part?" She asked, causing them both to laugh.
"That's a close second," He replied jokingly and Alex playfully rolled her eyes at him.
As he was walking past them, Marcus stopped and turned to look at the duo, a part of him looking annoyed. He had warned Alex about how shitty of a person Kaden was and yet, that didn't stop her from being with him.
"And we've been hanging out a lot lately and I was wondering if you'd want to make it official?" He asked Alex curiously and she smirked up at him.
"And be your girlfriend?" She questioned and Kaden nodded, "Definitely. I was wondering how long it would take you to ask," She paused, moving closer to him with a smirk on her face, "Anyways, I have to go meet up with my mom so text me later?"
"For sure," He assured her and Alex smiled before turning to walk away.
She began to walk away, only to stop when she heard Marcus scoff loudly. "So much for not being the dating type," He muttered under his breath and Alex stopped in front of him.
She stood in place, not even bothering to turn to him. "I told you I wasn't a good person. It was your fault you didn't listen," She told him, just before continuing to walk off.
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
DAMN that was fucked up, even for Alex. 😭