With trembling hands, I grabbed Lou's pillow from the bed and made my way carefully back down the steps to the couch. I searched desperately for my cell phone before pulling it from where it was wedged between the cushions. It took me a small moment to dial Niall's phone number.
Ring...
I glanced nervously about the room, desperately hoping that I wouldn't hear his ringtone.
Ring...
"We're sorry the number you have attempted to contact is no longer in service. Check the number and dial again. Goodbye," an automated voice answered just before the line clicked off and the sharp dial tone filled my ears.
I tried the number again, fingers shaking and breaths coming out short.
The same message played over again.
After a moment, I let the phone fall from my fingers. "Oliver!" I shouted. "Oliver, what have you done to Niall!"
"Niall? Who's Niall?" his small voice giggled.
I spun around desperately searching for any sign of his presence. "Oliver, give him back to me," I shouted in every direction. My hands trembled frantically at my sides.
A soft and broken giggle echoed through the house, "You know what's funny Harry?"
The television switched off and the small rug in front of it bunched up around the edges. "Oliver, nothing is funny! Give him back please..." I begged softly.
"But, something is funny Harry..." he replied. "I haven't taken anything from you Harry..."
My fingers tangled in my curls, tugging in desperate terror, "But you have... You have..."
Oliver's soft giggles mocked my every breath. "How could I?"
I sunk to the floor, just wanting to regain a small dose of my sanity. Maybe Niall hadn't come over. Maybe I was just a bit lonely. But, I had heard him talk. He had spoken to me, laughed at me even. He had been here.
My eyes squeezed shut tightly as I inhaled a shaky breath. I just needed to calm down, ignore the childish laugh that filled my ears and threatened to drown my well being.
"Harry?"
I froze, my breath hitching in my throat.
"Harry? What are you doing on the floor?" Niall laughed from the bottom of the staircase.
I turned hesitantly, letting my eyes open and focus on the lad. My fingers slipped from my curls and dropped to my lap as I stared at him. "You're here..." the words left my mouth in almost whispers, disbelieving and tentative.
"Course. Went to borrow a pair of you joggers. Are you alright?" he asked as he held out a hand to me. His blonde tufts of hair fell over his forehead as he grinned.
With a furious nod of my head, I grabbed his hand and let him pull me up. "Yeah... I thought you... Left," I laughed weakly. "Your pizza is heated up now..."
His hand slipped away as he darted into the kitchen, leaving me baffled.
The giggles had stopped and the carpet was no longer bunched with the hint of the lost boy's small presence.
I tugged at my hair before curling onto the couch. I wanted Lou to come home. He kept me sane.
-------------
Niall mindlessly chatted for the next few hours before leaving with a hug and a barely heard thank you for feeding him. So, in the new fallen dark of night, I merely stayed in the same position. My knees were curled tightly to my chest as the television created background noise for my impending insanity.
Deep breaths, Harry, I told myself with a small shutter of my eyelashes. You're in your house. You're by yourself. Louis is with his family. The doors are locked. The windows are shut. You're perfectly fine. You've got your phone if anything goes wrong.
I played with the hemline of my shirt as my eyes opened, thinking fondly of how Lou did the same thing. It was his only self conscious tell and I loved it.
My thoughts were momentarily replaced with pleasant images of the boy I loved as a soft smile curved my lips.
I thought of the way that his hip would stick out as he stood and about the way that he never wore socks. I thought of the fact that his feet and shoes smelled rank in comparison to the fruit scented shampoo that scented his feathery hair.
After a few moments, my thoughts drifted to the way that he would wrap his arms around my waist and rest his chin on my shoulder as I cooked. I thought of the way his toes would curl against my shins when we would climb into bed or the way that his fingers would entwine with mine when fervent touches just weren't enough. My fingertips ghosted over my lips at the thought of Louis' lips on them, it was odd that I couldn't remember the warm feeling they left but it was a pleasant thought all the same.
With a small motion, I lifted myself from the couch and wandered up the stairs to our bed where Louis' smell undoubtedly still graced the sheets. I tugged my shirt over my head before discarding it into one of the room's many piles and climbed into Louis' side of the bed. His side was the left, always the left. He had made it very clear that he owned that half of the bed, however, at night whenever the air conditioning was just a bit too cold, Louis would pretend not to notice me crossing the dividing crease in the sheets and enveloping him into my chest. So, for the moment, I curled into Louis' pillow, wishing that just maybe it might feel warm as if he had left only moments before.
I hummed a tune that Louis would sing whenever I wouldn't be able to keep my eyes shut in the dead of night. The soft vibration of the sound warming my chest as I pulled his pillow closer to my heart. I wouldn't be sleeping tonight if this house and my mind had anything to do with it.
After staring at the folds and creases in the sheets, I tugged my phone from my pocket and dialled Lou's number. It was late and he probably wouldn't answer. He was most likely worn out from playing with his sisters and already asleep.
Ring...
Ring...
"Harry...?" Louis' sleep ridden voice answered.
Guilt immediately filled me, "I didn't mean to wake you, Lou..."
"What's wrong, Harry...?" he continued on despite my apologies.
I turned onto my stomach with the phone pressed between my ear and the pillow, "Just couldn't sleep is all... I'm sorry... How's your trip...?"
There was a small chuckle on the other end of the line. "Want me to talk until you go to sleep, love?" he asked softly.
"I'm sorry to bother you, Lou..."
He chuckled again, "My trip has been great so far. I got here a little before dinner and mum made some sweet corn along with some seasoned steaks. It was really quite delicious. The twins had macaroni though as they complained that sweet corn was a travesty to their digestive systems. After dinner, Mum made us chocolate shakes with little mint leaves in them. You know, like the ones that I tried to make you?"
I small laugh escaped my lips as I let my eyes close. I remembered. I remembered coming home from class one afternoon and slipping on the kitchen tiles because Louis had forgotten to properly secure the lid to the blinder. I remembered the innocent look he gave me with bits of the mess dripping from his fringe and down his cheeks.
"I'll have to make them properly some time. The twins went to bed after that and the rest of us watched some terrible movie off of Netflix that Lottie had picked. It was by far the worst thing I've ever seen. It had, at best, like these C+ actors that couldn't remember not to look into the camera lens. One of the characters died and you could literally still see them breathing. It was dreadful," he continued, exasperation lining his voice.
"I bet you could have done it better yourself, hm Lou?" I supplied as I nuzzled my face into the pillow.
Louis scoffed, "Damn Right."
I chuckled again, feeling a little more at peace.
He was silent on the other end of the line for a while.
Sleep began tugging at my thoughts as I listened to his soft breathing in the receiver, "I miss you Lou..."
"I miss you too Harry... Nothing's as fun without you," he replied as sleep finally managed to drag me under.
Soft little giggles filled my ears as I opened my eyes. "Harry!" a childish voice called to me with a tug on my curls.
"What?" I chuckled before turning in the direction of the voice. My chuckles caught dead in my throat upon catching sight of the small child in front of me. Sandy blonde hair. Hazel eyes. Lightly freckled rosy cheeks. Oliver.
"You were saying weird things again," he giggled. His hair fell in waves on his head, falling into his face every now and then whilst curling onto the sides of his cheeks.
I watched him for a moment. This boy was filling my dreams where Lou was normally ever present. "Weird things?" I pressed. It was just a dream, why not humor the boy?
"About a boy," Olly poked a finger at his own cheek whilst standing on his toes. He wore a light blue shirt with a small embroidery on the left side: Lawrence Oaks. Probably just a shirt from where his father worked or something I had seen in passing, mentally attaching it to this boy.
"A boy?" I smiled at him.
He nodded his little head as a crooked grin spread across his lips.
A man entered then, he wore a set of light blue scrubs with an embroidery on the sleeve much like Oliver's. "How are you feeling, Harry?" he asked. His hair was brown and short. He had a pair of deep blue eyes that were oddly familiar.
"Fine," I answered, leaning back in the chair that I didn't remember sitting in.
Oliver played around the legs of the man, his finger tips prodding at the mans waist every now and then.
"Any stories today?" I found myself asking as the man pulled out a small paper cup and handed it over.
"Stories," the man hummed.
Habitually, I tilted the paper cup into my mouth letting the cool liquid soothe my throat.
"Well, today my little brother got caught coming home drunk with his friend. It was quite interesting. He had margarita salt all in his blonde hair," he chuckled a little. "In the brown roots it really looked like dandruff. He kept laughing. The funny thing though... His friend lost his balance walking through the front door and tried to grab onto him but ended up nailing him in the face instead."
"Wasn't hurt was he?" Oliver giggled.
"Nah, just told his friend he was tired of his advances and that he should go home," the man smiled down at him.
I was almost positive that Oliver didn't understand what that meant but it didn't matter.
A smile littered my cheeks. Niall had done something like that recently. Hadn't even gotten in trouble, if I could recall properly. Zayn left a bruise on his cheek for nearly a week and didn't even bother apologizing.
It was funny the things that pointless dreams made me remember.
AUTHOR'S NOTE AS OF 2017: On January 1st, 2018, IF YOU SEE THIS BOY will no longer be available for purchase on Amazon. If you would like a copy, please purchase before that date. Thank you for reading!