-February 2019-
Larry's POV:
It's lunch time, and we're all in my dressing room. Everyone is so quiet.
"Hey guys, what's happening?" I asked them, they all shrugged. "Let's talk things out?" I suggested. Everyone shrugged again. "Do you guys want to play something?" I asked, but I only received another shrug from all of them. "Uh, maybe we can....." I said thinking of something to break the silence.
"I got a C on a test." Sofia said while one tear went down her cheek.
"I forgot my lines." Dara said after Sof.
"My guinea pig died." Julia said after Dara.
"I miss my girlfriend." Matt said with a sad expression on his face.
"My mom hates me." Olivia said afterwards. What happened to everyone?
"My sister is going through some crisis." Josh said quietly, but we could all hear. He doesn't like to talk about his family much.
"Frankie is sick." I added, feeling like I needed to add something to the chain of misery. "So... that was a lot. Does everyone feel better?" I asked, they all shook their heads. "Maybe jokes will cheer you guys up." I suggested. "Okay, umm....What did one traffic light say to the other?.....Stop looking! I'm changing!" I said, but they were all silent.
"Umm, how about this one.... How do you throw a space party? You planet." I said but I got the same response as the last joke I said. "What about?.... Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?-"
"He just needed a little space." Sofia said without emotion.
"Oh, you know that one.... let me try another... Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything. Get it? because they..." I stopped, knowing no one was laughing.
"A man tells his doctor, "Doc, help me. I'm addicted to Twitter!"The doctor replies, "Sorry, I don't follow you ..." " I said trying to make them laugh.
"What did the left eye say to the right eye?" I asked
"Between you and me, something smells." Josh answered.
"What did the 0 say to the 8?" I ask again
"Nice belt." Liv responded.
"Okay, another one...umm.... How do you make a tissue dance?"
"Put a little boogie in it." Julia responded. "I used to tell that joke to Willow!" She said crying into my pillow. Okay, that totally didn't help.
"Uh, What do you call a magic dog?"
"A labracadabrador." Matt responded.
"I have more... um.... Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?...He was just going through a stage."
"Larry was that supposed to be a joke?" Josh asked looking at me. At least they're listening to me.
"Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?" I ask. I'm not giving up
"Because he lost his filling." Dara said rolling her eyes. "Everyone knows that one."
"Okay, here's one you guys don't know. How many times can you subtract 10 from 100? Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90."
"Larry, dude... that's not a joke." Matt said looking at me.
"Well, joke's on you for taking me as your clown." I laugh "Where does Batman go to the bathroom? The batroom." I said, no one said anything.
"Why did the frog take the bus to work today? His car got toad away."
Josh's POV:
"How do poets say hello? Hey, haven't we metaphor?" Larry said. How does he know so many dumb jokes?
"What do you call a train carrying bubblegum? A chew-chew train."
"Lar-bear do you think we're first graders?" Julia asks. She's not wrong though.
"Uh, okay. The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21. Get it 21 as in twenty won." He explained. I just nodded my head. Not sure what to do next.
"What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings? Any dog, because buildings can't jump."
"Larry-" Matt said but he didn't hear Matt.
"Why did the M&M go to school?"
"It wanted to be a Smartie. Old joke." Liv said fidgeting with her hands.
"Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There's no menu: You get what you deserve."
"Lar-" Sofia said but Larry interrupted him.
"Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar. "Get out of here!" shouts the bartender. "We don't serve your type." Get it? Type of letter fonts." He said. I'm done, someone shoot me.
"A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!" "Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."" Larry said again, making Dara and Julia laugh softly.
"What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta." Larry said, making Matt and I laugh too.
"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the "P" is silent." Larry smiled, making me and Liv laugh.
"What did the buffalo say when his son left for college? Bison." Larry told us. At this point we were all trying not to laugh.
"What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line." Larry said once again. We couldn't hold it in and burst out laughing.
"Finally! I was dying over here!" Larry said with a smile. "Okay, what do you-"He said but I interrupted him.
"Larry! Let's do something else that doesn't involve jokes!" I said tired of his lame jokes. Everyone else nodded.
"What's wrong with everyone except Larry? It's like we're cursed." Matt said.
"Are we cursed?" Dara said. I got a tissue box and dropped it loudly, but no one saw.
"DARA IT'S A GHOST! WE ARE CURSED" I said jumping out of my chair, pranking her.
"WHA- A GHOST? Y'ALL I- I CAN'T" She said running out of the room. Then everyone laughed. I'll take credit for it. I'm the cast clown. Suddenly Dara came back in the room with a broom, cleaning products and a weird looking astronaut type of suit. "Y'ALL WE GOTTA KILL THAT THING!" Dara said spraying pumpkin scented aerosol and moving the broom violently.
"Dara." I said trying to contain my laugh. "Dara, we-"
"WHY AREN'T ANY OF Y'ALL MOVING?" She asked terrified.
"Dara. The ummm.. The- the ghost is.... uh, it's gone! I saw it leave." I made up.
"Oh, thank goodness." She said falling on the couch exhausted. Then Claire called me.
"Uh.. I- I'm gonna go. You guys... just... uh stay here?" I said, questioning the words that came out of my mouth. I'm not sure why I don't like talking about my family.
"Claire? What's wrong?" I asked.
"Hi Josh. How are you?" She asked.
"Um, good? Are you okay?" I asked.
"No... It's- Something- something happened." She said stuttering.
"What?" I asked. I walked into my trailer as fast as I could. "Claire? You still there?"
"Yeah. Um, it's just that... Grandpa... he died." I heard her say.
"What?" I asked, thinking I heard wrong. "no. No. No. NO!" I said kicking the door. "He couldn't have! He was fine!" I said pulling my hair in desperation. I immediately started crying.
"Josh listen to me." I heard someone else say.
"Mom?" I asked, my voice cracking.
"Yes. You have to calm down. You're on set right now. Control your emotions." She said calmly.
"What?! How am I supposed to 'control my emotions' when Claire just told me that Grandpa passed away!" I yell into the phone.
"Listen to me. Breathe. Calm down." She said softly.
"I DON'T WANT TO CALM DOWN, OKAY. DON'T TELL ME TO DO THAT!" I said hanging up. He's gone. For real this time.
My hands started shaking, it was getting harder to breathe, and my chest started hurting. I felt like I was floating.
"JOSH!" I heard someone say far away. I couldn't really see, it was really blurry.
N/A
Should I post another chapter today?
idk, lol
u guys tell me