Hey!
Hopefully ay marami kayong natutunan habang nag-eenjoy na basahin ito. This is the first GL story I have ventured into and I am very sure that this is far from perfect but I know that in this field, there is always a lot of room for improvement.
Special Chapters would ONLY be available to the physical book of this story, advantage na rin po ng mga bibili ng book. Hopefully ay makabili rin kayo!
Announcement would be posted here soon but you can follow Chrisade Dee Writes on facebook for early updates or you can add me on FB instead: Christine Jade Denosta.
P.S. Nag-a-accept po ako ng requests especially from readers and co-writers!
So that's it!
Thank you for reading up until here. The last chapter would be published tomorrow.
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I didn't have the courage to face my parents. Hindi ko alam kung paano ko ipapaliwanag sa kanila ang lahat. When I arrived home the other day, Lola Tess told me na they've gone to school dahil sa ginawa kong pag-alis ng walang tamang permission.
And I was more than sure that Kat and my friends had already filled them out of what actually happened that day.
Nag-aalala ako kung kamusta na kaya ang lagay ngayon ni Paige. Was she immediately brought to the hospital? Malala kaya ang mga injuries na natamo niya?
I have all sorts of questions and what-ifs running on my mind pero hindi ko magawang humakbang palabas ng kwarto ko kahit na alam kung alalang-alala na sina Mommy.
"Hindi niya parin ginalaw ang pagkaing dinala ni Nila kanina." Rinig kong balita ni Lola Tess sa kung sino mang kausap niya sa labas ng kwarto ko.
"Sige na Nay, kami na hong bahala." Mariin kong ipikit ang mga mata ko nang marinig ang pagod sa boses ni Mommy. She stayed outside my door for two nights in a row, ni minsan ay hindi niya sinubukang pilitin na buksan ang pintuan ng kwarto ko, probably respecting the space I was quietly asking from them.
"Tegs?" she called out in her usual soft tone kasunod nang ilang beses na pagkatok niya sa pintuan ko.
Hindi ako sumagot. I mean... hindi ko alam kung paano sasagot.
Wala akong mukhang maipakita sa kanila. They raised me well. Showered me with love and attention, gave me everything I needed and wanted, tapos ano? Anong isusukli ko sa kanila?
Kahihiyan?
"Tegs? I'll open the door, okay?" Nang marinig ang paalam ni Mommy ay mabilis kong hinablot ang kumot ko at tinalukbong ko sa sarili.
I heard the sound of shuffling keys before the knob of my door produced a clicking sound. Mahigpit kong hinawakan ang kumot para kung sakali mang hilahin iyon ni Mommy ay hindi niya agad na makukuha.
I heard the door slowly open. Halos pigil ang hininga ko habang nag-aabang sa susunod na gagawin o sasabihin ni Mommy. But nothing came.
I only heard the door close and some shuffling sounds before some sort of heavy something landed with a quiet thud on the floor.
Tahimik ang buong kwarto ko at tanging ang tunog lang ng aircon ang naririnig. Bahagyang lumundo ang kama when she occupied the space beside me.
Naramdaman ko ang paglibot ng isang braso sa katawan kong balot na balot ng kumot. And just like that, I realized that it's not my mother.
Dahan-dahan kong ibinaba ang kumot na tumatabon sa katawan ko. Isang singhap ang kumawala sa aking mga labi nang mukha ni Paige ang bumungad sa akin.
Nakatagilid siyang nakahiga sa tabi ko, nakatingin sa akin. Hindi nakatakas sa mga mata ko ang puting bandage na nakadikit sa may noo niya.
"You're not eating," she pointed out in a breathy voice.
"You're injured," puna ko pabalik sa kanya.
She smirked at me before moving closer. Hinila niya ang kumot na nakatabon sa kalahati ng katawan ko at mas umusog pa para makapasok sa kumot.
My breathing hitch at her action. Hindi ko alam kung concious ba siya nang umamin ako sa harapan ng maraming tao, wala na iyon sa isip ko noong mga panahong iyon kaya naman hindi ko na masyadong napagtuonan ng pansin.
Agad na nangapal at nag-init ang magkabila kong pisngi sa isiping narinig niya ang lahat ng sinabi ko.
The whole room became too silent for me. Thoughts started racing down my mind. Hindi ko na maintindihan kung maganda ba iyon o ano. I just . . . I just can't think straight with her so close to me!
"Were you afraid?" tanong niya na gumulat sa akin. Kumunot ang noo ko dahil bahagyang naguluhan kung ano ang ibig niyang sabihin. "I guessed you were."
"A-anong—" naputol ang sasabihin ko nang bigla niya akong yakapin ng wala man lang babala. Her embrace was so tight, as if she missed me . . . so much.
My tears started clouding my vision once again.
All of my fears and pains all dawned on me.
I . . . like girls.
I . . . like Paige.
What if my parents can't accept that? My friends? The society I'm in? The people around me? What if pandirihan nila ako dahil—naputol ang lahat ng iniisip ko nang maramdaman ko ang magaang paghalik ni Paige sa noo ko.
"I know it's scary. I know all of the fears you have right now. But Teagan, you need to open your eyes," bulong niya sa may tainga ko nang isiksik ko ang ulo ko sa pagitan ng leeg niya. "Your parents are so worried about you. Sina Kat, sina Shai, sina Rhea? They were really shocked but they will come around. The people you love, Tegs. Think of them, they love you and would surely accept you no matter what."
"I am weird . . . I'm not normal . . ."
"Don't I look normal to you?" tanong niya na muling nagpatigil sa akin. Umalis ako sa pagkakasubsob sa may leeg niya. I turned my head to see her face.
"I like girls too, I like you to be exact. Am I weird?" tanong niya na nagpalito sa akin.
Paige was everything but weird.
She's smart, pretty, and a bit cold but sweet to those who are close to her. She has a bit of an attitude but it suits her personality pretty well.
I shook my head and that made her smile a bit. Umangat ang isang kamay niya at maingat na isinabit sa likuran ng tainga ko ang ilang hibla ng buhok na nagkalat sa may pisngi ko. Tinuyo niya ang bakas ng mga luha gamit ang hinlalaki niya.
"People may judge you . . . Us. For feeling this way, for being different from the norm but they can never blame us for being ourselves." Suminghot ako habang tahimik na nakikinig sa kanya bahagya siyang ngumuso at sandaling natigilan. I was staring at her all this time kaya naman nakita ko kung paano niyang sandaling pinag-iisipan ang bawat salitang lumalabas sa kanyang bibig.
"Humans were never perfect, Teagan. Albeit, you are already perfect in my eyes but to others?" Sandali siyang umiling at huminga ng malalim bago nagpatuloy. "They would always find faults against you just so they can feel good."
"Our flaws is what makes us perfect, Teagan," malambing niyang saad. "It's what makes us stand out from the crowd that tries so hard to drown out who we really are."
"Now, if you're still so scared . . . do you think it would help if I stand beside you as you face the world you fear the most?" Hindi ako agad nakasagot. She reached out for my hand and pulled them closer to her lips, kissing the back of it tenderly.
"TEAGAN!" Bahagya kong pinisil ang kamay ni Paige na hawak-hawak ko nang bigla akong sugurin ni Mommy ng yakap pagkalabas na pagkalabas ko palang ng kwarto. I didn't even expect her to stay outside my room while Paige and I talk.
"I-I'm s-sorry, Mom . . . I'm sorry . . ." Hagulgol ko kasabay ng pagyakap ko pabalik sa kanya gamit ang isa kong kamay.
"It's okay, baby. It's okay, we understand. Hmm? No need to worry about anything else. We love you so much, anak." Paulit-ulit ring bulong ni Mommy na mas nagpalakas ng iyak ko.
A few moments later ay naamoy ko ang pamilyar na perfume ni Daddy. I felt the familiar warmth his arms brought to me as he joined the hug.
I felt Paige hold on me tighten a bit kaya naman na patingin ako sa kanya habang nasa gitna parin ng mga magulang ko.
She smiled at me lovingly.
She opened her lips and quietly mouthed, "Told you."