Wednesday//10:15am
Kimani POV
I woke up in a white room, as I looked around there was nothing but a door. I grew confused as to what was going on so I walked closer to the door but the knob was already being turned.
I step back and waited for the person on the other side to open the door. When it opened, I saw that it was shia, my heart dropped and I backed up.
"Kimani.." he said.
I stayed silent as a single tear came to my eye. What is this? What's going on?
"Kimani.. why'd you let him do this to me? Was I not good enough for you?" He asked.
I tucked in my lip. "You used to hit me shia." I trembled.
"I didn't know better mani. My whole life I watched my dad put his hands on my mom and you knew that. It was a fucked up mistake, I know that, but I could've made it right.. I could've made it better, you didn't give me time." He explained.
"You were going to kill me if I stayed with you." I said.
"Kimani, I loved you. Believe it or not, I did. I tried to better myself but that was what I grew up with so I truly didn't know better. All I needed was time.." he trailed off.
I felt uneasy and wanted to get out of here. "Shia I can never forgive you for what you did. I was suffering, you put me in a state where I couldnt do anything or do anything for me." I explained.
"And I'm telling you now that I'm sorry. I wish I could tell you it in person and we could settle this but it's too late for that now." He said.
More tears start to pour down my face. I brushed past him and went out the door and that's where I woke up.
I woke up sweaty and hot. That dream... was it real? I couldn't stop but to feel emotional. I started to cry cause I didn't understand that at all, was it really shia talking to me? Was he really explaining to me why he did all of that.
Shia did have a rough teenage life. He watched his father beat on his mother and thought it was okay, he never had a father figure in his life to teach him that stuff like this was okay. I couldn't blame him at all.
I wiped my face and went downstairs to the kitchen and saw Jacy cooking in there.
"Morning bae, how you sleep?" He said to me as I was putting water in a kettle.
I ignored him and continued to do what I was doing. "Bae? Youn hear me?" He said again.
I ignored him once again as my face began to get hot. "Kimani" he repeated.
I turned around. "Why did you kill him?" I asked with my eyes getting teary.
"Fuck is you talkin about?" He questioned jerking his neck back.
"Shia. Why? I never asked you to do that." I said.
"Oh my gosh mani, I know you not boutta stand there and cry about a nigga that beat on you 24/7 for just breathing." He said.
"No, you didn't understand why he did those things. He didn't know better, we would've apologized to me and everything would've been fine. He just needed time! But you killed him!" I cried out.
He wiped his face. "Okay mani. Ian boutta deal wit you right now. You know exactly why I did that shit and the night you found out, we had sex. So I really don't care about the shit you talking about." He said.
"He really did love me, yes I was suffering in that relationship but it was all a phase to him. It was going to stop and before it did, you had to step in!" I yelled.
He got in my face. "That shit was not love Kimani. I don't care what that nigga went through, it wasn't love. He may have loved you in the beginning but he cheated on you before he started beating on you, and that's where he stopped loving you. What he did love was the idea of you, now I don't know what you on or if it's the pregnancy making you this way, but you needa go lay down somewhere and chill out." He sternly said.
"Your just saying shit, you don't know, you will never know! He was gonna quit out of it, I know for a fact. You just had to do you and ruin everything!" I argued.
"Ruin? The hell did I ruin? Y'all relationship was down the drain already. Shit I could've left yo ass to keep getting hit by that nigga multiple times. But yo ass ain't seeing that." He said then went back to the stove.
"Ugh! I wish I never met you!" I yelled then stormed out of the kitchen. He don't even know the half of what was going on. I went up to the room and slammed the door behind me.
I said on the bed and wiped my face until Jacy busted in the room.
"Fuck you talking about you wish you never met me?! I helped yo ass from getting killed, wake the fuck up kimani! That nigga did not love you! Stop lying to your self. I did yo ass a favor by killing that nigga." He argued.
"And then? Killing him did nothing to benefit you or me. I wanted a genuine apology from him in the end and he can't even do that anymore! Thanks to you." I cried.
"Ight bruh, if it's such a big deal and you wish you never met me. Pack yo shit and find yo own crib, shid you think I need a bitch who still stuck on her dead ass ex? On top of that abused you. I'm tellin you Kimani, if you truly feel that way then carry yo ass. If you don't then I advise you to shut the fuck up and I'll leave you alone by yo self till we gotta go to our appointment." He finished.
I stayed quiet cause I didn't know what else to say. He nodded "That's what the fuck I thought." He said then left the room, slamming the door in the process. I grabbed my sketch book and just sketched out some stuff to calm my mood.
An hour later
Jacy and I just parked up at the doctors appointment to see the gender. We were silent the whole way here, we had nothing to say to each other after this mornings argument.
We got out the car and went in the building. We went up to the front lady.
"Hello do you have an appointment today?" She asked.
"Yes for Kimani Goode." He said.
"Okay, have a seat and the nurse will call for you." She smiled.
We took a seat together and waited in silence for the nurse to call. It was 10 minutes later and we was just sitting down.
"Kimani Goode?" The nurse called out.
We got up and Jacy followed behind me and we got into the room. I sat up on the bed and he sat in the chair.
"So I'm going to ask you a few questions and then The doctor will come in after me." She said.
I nodded. She went ahead and asked me the questions and then left, leaving us in a room of silence once again.
"Jacy-
"Not right now Kimani." He said cutting me off.
"But-"
"Man what did I just say." He repeated looking at me annoyed.
I took a deep breath and the doctor came some time later.
"Are you excited to see what you both are having today?" She said.
I smiled. "Yes ma'am we are." I said.
"Alrighty then let's get started as soon as possible." She said.
I laid down on the table and lifted my shirt. Jacy stood beside me to see the screen better and then she placed the cold gel and started looking around at the screen.
I didn't know what I was looking at at first but then it was clear to me what it is. She told us the gender and I smiled, Jacy did a small smile as well.
We finished up and she decided on giving us the pictures of it and I asked if we can get multiple copies cause that's how we were going to set up our baby reveal.
She gave us the copies and then we left out back in the car and went on with the drive home.
At Home
I locked the front door and I watched as Jacy jogged up the steps.
Sage turned around from the couch in confusion. "What's wrong with him?" She asked.
I sat next to her and sighed. "We got in a bad argument this morning."
"About?" She said.
"I basically told him I wish I never met him." I said twisting my lip.
"Why?"
"I had this weird dream about shia and it was him saying why did I let Jacy kill him and saying that he was gonna apologize and then I woke up and went off on Jacy." I explained.
"It's probably what you dreamed of Shia being, you know if he was still here, he would've continued to make your life hell so I don't blame Jacy for doing it." She replied.
"Well yes I guess. But now he don't even wanna talk to me." I shrugged.
"You should go up there and talk it out with him now that y'all are home." She said.
"I am. Hopefully he don't shut me out or nothing." I said.
"Anyways, what are you having?" She smiled.
I went and told her what the baby was and she clapped and got excited. She gave me a tight hug and then I went upstairs to settle this out with Jacy.
When I walked in the room he was putting on some sweats. "Jacy?" I said.
He ignored me and my presence and took off his shirt. I walked up to him and grabbed his arm "Jacy please talk to me, I'm sorry for what I said this morning. I just had a weird dream and it made me snap on you." I said.
"Kimani I ain't even mad that you crying over that dead nigga. I'm mad at the fact that you said some stupid shit like you wish you never met me. Ian trynna be cocky but I may be the best nigga you ever met and you trynna fuck shit up." He said.
"I know and I'm sorry. I will never say that again, I really do love you and I'm glad that I have met you." I said.
He looked at me for a moment then gave me a peck on the lips. "Ima forgive you cause you my baby and I love you. But Kimani I swear if you say some shit like that out yo mouth, we taking a break." He said.
I nodded my head. "Ight. So what dream did you have to make you do the most?" He asked.
He sat on the bed as I told him everything. "Dreams like that is just what your mind saw the good of him. You and I both know that nigga was never gonna apologize mani." He said.
"Probably. But I'm over it now, I just wanna spend some time with you right now." I said.
"Come here." He said grabbing my hand as he laid on the bed.
I got beside him and cuddled with him. He kissed my head and I felt myself slowly falling asleep.