Chapter forty-six; Relationship advice
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Weeks were going by and Jasmine was as thrilled to have secret talks with Remus just as she was when they confessed feelings to each other. Of course, it didn't compare to what it would be like showing affection in front of others too but until now it was only the two of them. No disruptions, no judging eyes and no whispers and gossip. It was like they were in a small bubble away from the real world and its problems.
Jasmine was laying on her back on her bed, her head hanging upside down over the edge of the mattress. Lily was on her bed too but she didn't risk getting a headache from all the blood that was at the moment of speaking rushing into Jasmine's head.
''If I say that I'll maybe try and get myself to read more books, what would you recommend?'' Jasmine asked, putting special emphasis on the word maybe.
The mattress shook and Jasmine had to use all her strength to look up to see Lily perked up and looking excitedly down at her. She chuckled and then picked herself up completely, immediately getting a wave of dizziness because she was hanging down for such a long time.
''I have been waiting for this all my life, let me think,'' Lily said excitedly.
Jasmine restrained from rolling her eyes jokingly at the ridiculous behaviour of Lily. She watched her a little as Lily kept flickering her eyes all over the room trying to think of titles that were going to work for Jasmine.
''Okay, we have Emma, which I've read to you before, Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre-''
''Those are all romance novels aren't they?'' Jasmine asked sensing a red line going through the titles as to what Lily was suggesting.
Lily stared back at her blankly. ''Well yeah, for the most part. I thought you liked romances.'' Said the redhead with a newfound confusion on her features.
Jasmine chuckled awkwardly but nodded nonetheless. ''Yeah, I do, but are there any interesting dark and realistic novels, like presenting the struggles of society?'' Jasmine asked, curiosity laced in her voice.
Lily was almost taken aback by her question. She looked at her best friend weirdly, peculiar thoughts circling in her head. It was one thing for Jasmine to willingly start a conversation about books, it was a whole another when she asked for advice which ones are good. And then there's the fact that she sounded like a complete book nerd, which Jasmine never proved to be, when she wanted something else than romances. Something wasn't sitting right with the situation but Lily dropped those thoughts and searched her memory for the desired genre of books Jasmine asked for.
Unbeknownst to Lily, this was Jasmine's plan. She maybe went a little too far but once she saw Lily start thinking about the question she knew the redhead won't meddle on the reason behind Jasmine's inquiries. Remus' birthday was nearing and Jasmine knew exactly what to get him. Well, she knew she wanted to gift him a book so that was the whole reason behind questioning Lily about books in general.
''Let's see,'' Lily started saying. ''War and Peace is a marvellous story but it's a bit harder to get through and it describes muggle history and world problems and you have to know what actually happened in order to understand the heaviness of the story.''
''You're saying that like you haven't told me the whole muggle history already, I know about world wars and everything.'' Jasmine interrupted making Lily chuckle.
Jasmine really did know a lot of muggle history, she was also told a lot by her mother as the woman confessed she really enjoyed muggle studies at Hogwarts, and if she was truthful it was way more interesting than wizard history.
''Oh!'' Lily suddenly said excitedly with wide eyes and grabbed Jasmine by both of her hands. ''There's this story my parents told me about, it's called Crime and Punishment and it just recently got newly translated from Russian. It's about a murderer who kills someone because he thinks he's doing good for society but then guilt starts eating him up slowly as he starts thinking about it more and more. I've been dying to read it but I haven't found it in the library or the bookstore.''
Jasmine tried to mirror Lily's excitement as she told her the basic plot. When Lily looked away the brunette cringed slightly as in her own mind she would never pick up such a book, but then she thought what joy it would bring Remus if she got it for him for his birthday. She just hoped he hadn't read it before because what is worse than receiving a book you don't like, a book that you've already read.
Jasmine took a breath as if to answer but at the same time, the door to the room opened with a swish and in stepped Robyn. Both Jasmine and Lily watched the darker brunette as she shut the door with a loud bang, proceeded to toss her bag on the floor and throw herself on her own bed. Lily and Jasmine looked at each other with weird expressions before their heads turned to Robyn's bed again.
''Robyn, are you alright?'' Jasmine asked with a concerned voice.
She didn't receive a response from the girl herself as she only wrapped herself in a blanket and buried her head into the pillow. Jasmine drew her eyebrows together in more confusion before she stood up and travelled to her friend's bed. Her expression saddened as she saw the frown etched on Robyn's face.
''What's the matter? Did something happen?'' Jasmine asked again. She sat down on the edge of Robyn's bed and put a comforting hand on her leg.
''Nothing, I'm fine,'' Robyn replied looking anywhere but Jasmine.
The light brunette frowned as she turned her head to look at Lily. The redhead was watching with a newfound emotion too, she was as confused as Jasmine was. Then Lily shrugged as Jasmine kept helplessly look at her. Jasmine sighed a little and started caressing Robyn. She stayed quiet feeling it was enough she was sitting there even if Robyn didn't want to say anything. A few quiet minutes passed when Robyn moved to sit against the headboard of her bed.
''I'm confused.'' She said quietly.
Jasmine scrunched up her eyebrows even more. ''What are you confused about?'' She asked, searching Robyn's face for any emotion.
Robyn was playing with her fingers and watching her hands with a bummed out expression. She was thinking how to go about this and what to say because now it was no time to back down as she already started talking. Jasmine patiently waited but didn't glance away.
''Relationships. And boys. And feelings and everything.'' Robyn let out more frustratingly than not.
That intrigued Lily and she also stood up from Jasmine's bed. She timidly stepped closer but stayed put and quiet not interweaving in the Hufflepuff's friendship.
''Are you and Sirius...'' Jasmine said slowly searching for the right phrase to use. ''off again?''
They weren't in a relationship, it was really this on and off thing. Robyn shook her head quickly but she was still watching her hands. Jasmine now felt like she was of no help, not if Robyn would stay quiet. She looked behind her at Lily who was awkwardly standing in the middle of the room. The redhead then took a few more steps and leaned on the pole of the bed, watching Robyn curiously. Jasmine had to give it to Lily, she really was trying to erase whatever spat was between her and Robyn.
Robyn let out a long breath. ''I don't know. Everything is fine but at the same time, it isn't. When I'm with Siri we usually kiss or have sex-''
Jasmine coughed rather loudly and awkwardly as Lily at the same time widened her eyes at Robyn's openness about the topic.
''And don't get me wrong I like it. But sometimes I wish there was more to it. To go on a walk with him around the Black Lake, to spend time with him in the library even though he swears he doesn't willingly spend time there, to sleep in his dorm I don't know.'' Robyn finished biting her lip. Her eyebrows were heavy with anxiety and frustration as she had no idea what was going on.
Lily pursed her lips a little and couldn't help herself but to speak up. ''So you want Black to be your boyfriend?'' She asked lightly.
Robyn picked up her head as if she only then noticed that the Gryffindor was present. She stared at Lily for a little while but other than that she didn't react like she usually would. She looked away and took a deep breath. ''No, I don't want him to be my boyfriend.'' She said.
Jasmine visibly deflated at the last words. She shook her head a little as she reached forward and grabbed Robyn's hand so she would stop fiddling. ''Robyn what you just described is a relationship between a boyfriend and girlfriend,'' She said softly.
Robyn frowned even more if that was possible. They weren't helping as much as she thought they would and somehow her mood got even graver. ''I don't want a relationship. It's a commitment and it also means that what you have you will lose someday and I don't want to know how that feels. Whatever I had so far were flings with no attachments.'' Robyn disclosed, but the feeling that that wasn't everything was left hanging in the air.
Jasmine squeezed her hand lightly trying to show her she is there for her.
''Not all relationships are doomed from the beginning. Look at Frank and Alice for example.'' Lily said.
''Or your parents, they set a pretty good example too,'' Jasmine added with a light smile.
Robyn adored her family and Jasmine knew that the mention of them would bring a smile, even if so small, on her face. Robyn did smile and she squeezed Jasmine's hand back showing that she was thankful for this. Jasmine and Lily looked at each other briefly and in that time Robyn's smile disappeared as she started anxiously biting her lip again.
''Relationship is a word used to seriously here, friendship is also a sort of relationship just in a platonic way. What I mean to say - it is a label used by people and whatever is between you and Sirius doesn't have to be labelled. You two can be whatever you want to be.'' Lily spoke in a lighter tone, but stayed put not trying to intrude in Robyn's personal space. Robyn watched her as she was saying taking every word in.
''Lily's right,'' Jasmine added. ''You can still do all the things you want and not be boyfriend and girlfriend, you just have to tell this to Sirius. For it to work you have to say things not just kiss. You two both have to take equal part in your...'' Robyn looked up with slightly widened eyes as she anticipated what Jasmine would say. ''connection.'' Jasmine finished nicely not scaring her friend.
Robyn nodded slowly before a small smile started tugging on her lips. She liked the things she was told and it was not bad to think about it since she could do whatever she wanted without being prejudiced by others in the school. She looked at both Jasmine and Lily who seemed pleased she was smiling.
''Who would've thought that you two who have never had boyfriends would give such great advice for relationships.'' Robyn sniggered.
Lily rolled her eyes but with a smile present on her features. Jasmine chuckled at the comment and shook her head lightly. Then she opened her arms and invited Robyn in for a hug.
''Thank you. Both of you.'' Robyn murmured and looked up from Jasmine's shoulder at Lily.
Lily smiled again before she was also pulled in what then was a group hug. Jasmine couldn't feel happier that her two best friends were finally getting along.
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