James couldn't sleep.
He went on the date, only because the stupid girl wouldn't stop sending him patronuses to confirm.
It was awkward and timid but the girl seemed to enjoy it. She barely even noticed how weird james was being because she was too happy fangirling over him.
Then at the end of the night she went in for a kiss and james had to nervously slip away while her eyes were closed.
It was an asshole move but he had better things to worry about, like his boyfriend and how he was gonna make up for it.
James couldn't sleep, how could he after what happened that day.
So he stood up, grabbing the invisibility cloak from under his bed and tucking it under his arm.
He softly got up, walking to the door after grabbing one of his quidditch hoodies and leaving his dorm.
After the soft click of the door closing rang around the room, sirius' bed shuffled.
" you think hes going to go see him?" Sirius said into the night. He didnt need the light to know that remus would be awake.
" it better be." Remus responded.
" i hope he fixes it."
" me too pads. Me too."
————————————————————————————————————————
James was walking around the castle grounds. He visited the kitchens, grabbing a biscuit and saying goodnight to the house elves.
He passed by filches office, giving himself a scare when Mrs.Norris stared right into him even with the cloak on. It felt like she was staring into his soul.
A shiver went down his spine just thinking about it.
And then he finally landed here, wrapping his hand around the cold handle of the door leading to the room of requirements.
They had found it on accident when they lost wormtail as a rat and the door just randomly appeared in front of them. inside was wormtail confused beyond belief.
The room was supposed to change into whatever he wanted, but it couldn't be whatever because there is no way it can conjure up people.
James went in anyway, eyes down as he entered and turned around to close the door.
" who's there?" A surprised voice called out.
James' head snapped up. He knew that voice from anywhere but it couldn't be right? He didnt know what the room of requirements was...
" hello?"
James turned around and his breath hitched.
He turned to see that severus was sitting there, a black t shirt on and grey sweatpants, sitting on a large armchair with a glass in his hand.
James gulped.
Should he take the cloak off? Should he just turn around and walk out?
Before james could make any movements, severus was already getting up. He was walking past him and was about to go for the door when james' hand involuntarily came up to snatch his forearm.
" no." His voice said without thought.
Severus sighed, biting the inside of his cheek and turned around, his arm slipping from james' grip.
" so it was you." He walked back to the armchair, sitting down and picking up his glass again.
He couldn't sleep, and he definitely couldn't drink the rest of the whiskey without lucius or mulciber waking up and wanting some.
Bloody heathens could smell alcohol a mile away.
" what are you doing here?" Severus said softly.
James blinked, not really expecting him to be the first to talk.
He slowly grabbed the edge of the cloak, ripping it off himself and letting it land on the floor.
Severus didn't look up. He just looked....glum.
" dont know. I couldn't sleep." He willed himself to speak or else he may have never been able to say a word.
Severus hummed in response and nodded, looking down at his glass.
" did you have fun on your date?"
The word date slipped out from his mouth like it was something evil.
James gulped and shifted.
" no."
Severus' gaze shot up. He wasn't expecting THAT.
" no?"
"No."
James shook his head. He brought his hands up, bringing the long hoodie sleeves just below his knuckles. It was kind of getting cold.
How severus wasnt freezing was beyond him.
" it was really awkward and timid. I was super uncomfortable the whole time and it was nothing like when we would hang out-"
" dont compare me to her please." Severus said with a grimace.
" im not! I just......" he looked down.
" it just didn't feel right."
" then why did you say yes?" Severus finally looked at him.
His gaze was cold, hurt, unwelcoming.
It made james' muscles tense.
" i-i dont know."
" you dont KNOW?" Severus questioned.
James' eyes darted, looking anywhere and everywhere but severus. He bit his bottom lip and shrugged.
" i dont know! I was caught off guard, I didn't want to out our relationship in case you didn't want to-"
" so its on me now?"
" no! I just.....im not used to having to reject girls. Especially when im already in a relationship. Usually everyone knows by the end of the first day."
Severus' gaze eased, but didn't soften. It was still hard and he was still glaring at james emotionlessly.
Severus shook his head and stood up.
James came closer and grabbed his arm, severus refusing to look him in the eye.
" please sev, i....i didnt mean it. I really didn't."
" no its fine. If you wanna date other people its fine."
" no thats not it!"
" james.....its ok. So we'll also be dating other people its fine. He never said we had to be exclusive."
Severus shook his arm off and continued walking. James stood there confused.
" wait what? What are you saying?" James looked back.
Severus stopped walking and exhaled. He turned his head but not his body.
" if you're dating other people, so can i right?"
James blanked. What? What?! NO! NO NO NO. That is NOT what he wanted to happen.
" the fuck?" It slipped out before he could control it.
" the fuck? NO! No! What the fuck, NO!" He was spiraling.
Severus exhaled, he turned around and looked down.
" james just-"
" NO. I didn't go into this for an open relationship, this is NOT what this is!"
" THEN WHAT IS IT? Hm james? Because apparently you go on random dates with random girls and I CANT do the same?"
" NO!"
" WHY?!"
" BECAUSE IM NOT SHARING MY FUCKING BOYFRIEND!"James snapped.
Severus stepped closer but james stayed rooted to his place.
"then how come i have to share mine?"
Severus' voice was dangerously low but all logic seemed to fly over james' head.
" that was a one time thing, i was on the spot, I DIDNT EVEN WANT TO GO ON THE DAMN DATE. I only went because she wouldn't stop persisting!"
" then why did you say YES?!"
" I PANICKED!"
" you PANICKED?! You cannot pull this shit and blame it on being PANICKED." Severus spat.
James' mouth flew open but he didn't have any words.
" look. It was a mistake. I hated it. I hated the date. I didn't like the girl and the whole time i was thinking how i hurt you. Please, sev. It was a mistake."
James took severus' forearm, grabbing onto it for dear life.
Severus' chest was rising up and down. Tears were forming in his eyes and he looked away.
" what if this happens again? What happens when this happens again and that time you actually like the girl? Hm?"
" but i wont."
" how can you guarantee that?!"
" because i LOVE YOU! I love you ok?! I love you more than anything i have ever loved in my entire life. When im around you i feel like my heart is going to explode and i can barely breath. Please sev..."
James was begging. He was begging and he was fully aware of that.
Severus wasn't even trying to hide the tears anymore, they were falling down his face and he was letting them.
" i cant.....i cant do this if THIS is what its gonna feel like. If i cant be with you in front of people, if i cant kiss you or touch you, if i have to watch OTHER people hit on you and not be able to do anything. I cant james.....i cant." Severus' voice deepened, going softer and wavering.
James grabbed his hand and intertwined their fingers.
" it wont be like this. I swear it wont. Please it was a mistake, I couldn't even bring myself to do a proper goodbye, i just ran. Please sev....dont leave."
James rest his forehead against his, taking his other hand to wipe at severus' tears as his own were starting to fall.
Severus leaned into the touch by pure instinct. He closed his eyes, more tears falling.
" severus.....dont go. Dont leave me, dont see other people, dont even look at other people. Just be with me."
" you're being selfish."
" i dont care. I cant share you. I cant be one of the few people you are seeing. I cant watch you be close to someone else, if i do im gonna die. Please i love you so much."
James planted a kiss on severus forehead, then his cheek until he was peppering severus with kisses.
" i love you sev." He said between kisses. His voice was coarse and barely a whisper.
Severus took them, any form of affection from james being allowed even though he wanted to hate james so much right now.
But he couldn't.
Whenever he saw james his knees would go weak, his heart would pound and his stomach twisted itself in knots.
He wanted to hate james but his body physically couldnt.
" james dont." He finally pushed away when james started to trail down to his jaw.
He had to stop before he allowed himself to her hurt again.
James looked dejected. He was trying, he really was. He just didn't know what he could do to make it all better.
" you cant just come in here, say you wont share me and then kiss me. You cant just make me change my mind, promise to stop the hurting when you cant even guarantee what happened today will never happen again!"
" but it wont!"
" how do you know that?!" Severus yelled.
James gulped and stepped closer.
" ill make it up to you. Ill spend tomorrow, the day after that, or the week later, however long it takes making it up to you. Just please dont ignore me." James pleaded.
Severus gulped. He bit his bottom lip and looked away, silent. He didnt have the words but it felt like he had a million things to say.
" sev?" James whispered.
Severus finally looked back, eyebrows furrowed and blinked.
" fine."
He surprised even himself with how menacing that came out but for whatever reason james seemed to completely look over that fact.
His eyes lit up with hope and his lips slightly parted.
" wait really?"
" why do you not want the second chance?"
" NO NO! No of course i do!" James panicked. His eyes widened but there was a smile starting to form on his face.
Severus shifted, looking down at the floor and kicking it slightly. He sighed and looked up but refused to make eye contact.
" then ill see you later. Bye." Severus waved and turned, reaching for the door.
He left the room, the door shutting closed and the room morphing to fit james.
The fire whiskey was gone and so was the armchair but there was a bed and a table.
He walked to the bed, sitting down and placing his head in his hands.
He got a second chance.....he just cant ruin it.