--Month 6--
I sat in the tower, Judith in my arms, as we looked up at the setting sun. The sky is painted with shades of pink, orange, and red as the sun descends. Judith babbled in my arms as she turned, her hazel eyes looking at me as she smiled. She's about six months old and perfect in every way. She had Lori's hazel eyes, but I couldn't help but notice how she's looking a bit like Shane as she grows older. I always knew this baby was his, but seeing some of his features on her still surprises me—I just hoped she was Rick's. If I can see the similarities, I'm sure Rick can too.
Judith rested her head against my shoulder and continued to babble, her hands coming to yank on the few stray hairs that escaped my ponytail. I hissed as she pulled, gently prying her hand away from me as she giggled. I promised Lori that I would care for her kids as if they were my own, and I'm trying to live up to my promise. Carl is doing so well! It makes me incredibly proud of him. He's thriving and even turning into that loveable kid I met almost two years ago. We both know I can never come close to taking Lori's place, but he accepts me. Selena has gotten closer to me, but she and Carl are glued at the hip. I suspect she has a little crush on him, but she'll never spill the beans. I heard the door open behind me, causing my head to snap back and tighten my arms around Judith.
"It's just me." Rick smiled as he came into view, his hands up and pointed towards me as a friendly gesture. Judith stirred in my arms, her head popping up to look over my shoulder and a happy squeal escaping her lips as she saw her daddy. I smiled and felt Rick sit beside me, his arms extended so he could hold his daughter. I handed her over, watching as she slammed into him and babbled excitedly.
"She loves her dad." I mused, looking up at Rick. He smiled at me and looked down at his daughter, his blue eyes scanning her face as she twisted and turned in his arms. He frowned slightly, just slightly, before pushing his lips back into a smile as he turned to look at me.
"Not as much as she loves you, though." Rick chuckled as he put her down so she could attempt to crawl around the tower. It's good that the outside door is shut, or I would have a heart attack. "You're her mom. That always beats Dad."
"Probably." I nodded, agreeing with the man, a chuckle escaping my mouth. I looked down at her again as she crawled, her face full of determination. "She's such a silly baby." I mused, leaning into Rick.
"That she is," Rick agreed, his arm wrapping around me as we watched Judith sit up on her own and tug at some of the wires hanging from the control panel. I frowned and bit my lip, worrying about an electric shock, but then shook my head as I realized there was no electricity running through here.
I sank into Rick and sighed contently, enjoying the time he and I could spend with one another. We went through hell together with the whole Governor situation, and now we're just enjoying our peaceful time. A knock interrupted our moment of peace, our heads snapping towards the noise. Daryl opened the door and nodded at the two of us, his crossbow slung across his shoulder as he approached us.
When Daryl walked in on us that night two months ago, it took everything in me to stop him from beating Rick to a pulp. We managed to keep the quarrel between us, but people definitely noticed how he was standoffish with Rick for a while. Daryl had accepted our relationship, and now he was managing to be happy for us, but I could see the hesitation in his eyes every time he saw us together. He explained that he didn't want to see me hurt and just wanted to protect me. Then, after a week of shunning Rick, they talked, man to man, as Daryl put it. I still don't know what they talked about; they both refuse to tell me, but it seems like everything is behind them, and they're acting like the friends I know them to be.
"Hey, Dixon." I smiled at the man, my heart fluttering as I scanned his face. I pushed myself away from Rick and stood on my two feet, anxious to hug him. I embraced him tightly, smiling so widely that my cheeks strained. He wrapped his arms around me and lowered his head, his face hidden by my ponytail, as we enjoyed being together again. "Did you find anything?" I asked him as I pulled away. He nodded and flashed me a rare smile before looking over at Rick.
"Managed to find some seeds for corn and a few boxes of ammo, still no sign of him anywhere," Daryl reported. I nodded and looped my arm around his back, still excited to have him back.
"Good." Rick nodded as he watched Daryl and me, "As long as he's gone, we don't have anything to worry about." Daryl grunted at Rick as his eyes landed on Judith, still tugging at the wires and trying to chew on them desperately. I gasped as I saw her and ran forward, lifting her in my arms and brushing away the dust around her mouth. "Don't stress over it, June. She's not going to electrocute herself. There's no electricity here."
"Still." I defended as I cradled her, "We don't know what kind of germs are on the wires, and I don't want her getting sick." Rick and Daryl chuckled as they saw me wipe away at her mouth, my paranoia getting the best of me.
"First-time moms," Daryl muttered as he extended his arms out. I smiled at Judith and handed her over to him, my heart almost bursting at the seams as he hugged her tightly. Daryl's a big softie for Judith, and it makes my heart melt every time. "Has she eaten yet?"
"No." I answered as I looked down at my watch, "It's almost 7:30, so it's time for her to eat something." Daryl nodded at me and bounced her slightly.
"We still have those mashed apples you made this morning?" He asked me. I nodded and crossed my arms in front of my chest, feeling empty with her no longer in my arms. "I'll go ahead and give her that. You stay and relax, June."
"Thanks, Daryl." He nodded at me and opened the door behind him, exiting and waving Judith's hand at Rick and me as he closed the door again. I couldn't help but worry—I got used to being with her almost every second of the day this past month, and being away from her sparked anxiety in my chest.
"She'll be fine," Rick reassured me as he approached me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, his hands interlocking in front of my chest. "You need to calm down."
"I can't help it." I laughed as I turned around, his hands lowering and wrapping around my waist as I rested my head against his chest. "I've gotten used to being with her almost every second of every day."
"I've noticed," Rick noted as he lifted my face with a finger under my jaw. "You are an awesome mom."
"She's not my kid, not biologically, at least." I frowned, feeling that familiar ache in my chest. I've always wanted kids, but it no longer seems like an option. If things continue to go this well here at the prison, maybe one day I can have a kid. Rick caressed my face, his fingers tracing the lines of my lips as he continued to scan my face. Slowly, I rose to the tips of my feet and wrapped my arms around his neck. Our breathing slowed as his hands caressed me, and his fingers knotted the loose hair around my ponytail.
"You're beautiful." He whispered to me as he finally brought his lips to mine. Our lips moved slowly in unison as we stood there kissing. He dropped his hand down and squeezed my hip as the pace of our kiss quickened. I still couldn't wrap my head around it—I always told Daryl and Lori that nothing was happening between Rick and me or that Rick and I just liked to flirt, but now here we are.
I felt my back hit the wall as Rick pinned me, his lips leaving mine as they trailed wet kisses down my neck. Without thinking, I craned my neck to the side as he continued leaving his trail of kisses, a moan escaping my lips as he bit me lightly. He pulled away from me, his eyes filled with lust as he worked quickly on unbuttoning my flannel. With excitement coursing through my veins, I quickly grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head, tossing it onto the floor. My hands trailed down to his arms and wrapped around his lower back.
My flannel was ripped off me and tossed to the side as he hungrily ripped the straps off my tank top. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips as my torn straps fell from my shoulders—well, there goes another shirt. He tugged at my tank top, the fabric lowering to my hips—my bra the only thing covering my upper body. A giggle escaped my lips as his fingers stumbled with the button of my pants, a sly smile spreading across his lips as our eyes met. My lust heightened as he brought our lips together, his tongue slipping into my mouth as he deepened our kiss.
My hands found their way down to the front of his jeans, my fingers making easy work of the button. Together, we kicked off our pants and lowered ourselves onto the ground—his heavy body hovering over me as he moved his mouth to my neck. I could feel my breathing hitch in my throat as his mouth stopped just a few inches above my breast, his rough, calloused hands grabbing my bra strap and gently lowering it to expose me. We locked eyes as he fully encased my breast into his mouth, his tongue swirling around my nipple and making moans escape my mouth at the feeling.
"Rick." I moaned as I felt my heart hammer in my chest. He wasted no time slipping off my underwear and kicking off his boxers, his excitement getting the best of him. I spread my legs open, biting my lip as he looked down at my body before slowly entering me. I bit back a moan as I felt him start thrusting his hips into me, my excitement beginning to overwhelm me and making my head swim. He let out a moan as he continued to thrust, his lips capturing mine as I started to move my hips in perfect unison with him. I felt the familiar tightness in my groin, my teeth biting on my lower lip to repress a loud moan as complete euphoria washed over me with my release – God damn, this has got to be a record or something for me! Rick peeled himself off me in time to find his release all over my stomach. I laughed as he opened his eyes and saw the mess he had made, his lips turning up in a smile. Well, it seems this goes down for the quickest sex and quickest orgasm ever! You won't hear me complaining, though! Now, that's what I would call a fantastic quickie.
"Oops." He chuckled as he tugged on my torn tank top that was still hugging my hips and used it to wipe away his mess.
"At this rate, I won't have any more shirts, Grimes," I teased, "You owe me,"
"Put it on my tab," He joked, tossing my torn shirt to the side. Sitting up, I readjusted my bra and slipped on my flannel, buttoning it up to the top. We dressed in silence and shared teasing glances, smiling at one another occasionally as he slipped on his shirt. Walking up to me, he wrapped his arms around me and held me close—the two of us still enjoying our time together. I pulled away from him and tiptoed, kissing his lips before grabbing his hand and leading him out of the guard tower. He held the door open and wrapped his arm around my shoulders as we slowly walked towards the prison.
"So, is it safe to say we're doing that again?" I looked at Rick and laughed, amused by how he always asked me the same question after we just had sex.
"Keep making me come in under a minute, and you've got a deal," I winked at him.
"No guarantees," He teased before we broke out into laughter. We both know he'll always make me finish – he hasn't failed yet.
"While we're on the topic of sex... did you talk to Carl?" Rick nodded, his cheeks flushing as he reminisced. I've been bugging him to talk to his son about sex since I had the sex talk with Selena. "How'd it go?"
"It was okay," He sighed, "Just embarrassing," I chuckled at him and decided to change the subject on him—it's bad enough that he already feels embarrassed.
"I think Selena has a crush on him," I announced. Rick smirked and squeezed him to me, his lips connecting to my forehead.
"I think Carl has a crush on Selena," Rick chuckled, "I think we should keep an eye on them—make sure they aren't doing things they're not supposed to,"
"You mean like us?" I joked, poking his side. Rick flinched and laughed, his eyes darting to me.
"Exactly," He smiled before changing the subject once again, "Hey, you never finished telling me about that time your sister almost killed you," I shook my head, the memory instantly flashing in my mind. I was the annoyed, irritable older sister, and sometimes I was a bitch to Summer.
"Well, it was one day after school, and my mom had picked us up. We used to cut through all these alleys, and I remember it was close to summertime. I was already going through puberty and was moody—just a plain bitch—I forgot what I said or what I did, but I pissed Summer off so bad! She grabbed a rock, and I'm not talking about these small little ones; I'm talking about one almost the size of a cinder block, and she threw it at me." Rick laughed, his eyes shutting and his arm leaving my shoulders to hold his side, "It missed my head by like an inch," Rick continued to laugh, probably imagining the scenario. I chuckled and shook my head at the memory, feeling a wave of nostalgia. "What about you, Grimes? You almost kill your brothers?"
"Nothing like that," Rick chuckled as he calmed down, "Worst I ever did to him was push them down some steps," I looked up at him as a silly smile spread across his lips, "I do remember this one time, though, I was probably thirteen, and Justin was around eighteen. I came home early from school, ditched with Shane, and heard these noises from the bathroom. I still remember Shane and me sharing that scared look like we were about to be busted. Here comes Justin, butt-naked, with some girl wrapped around him. The first time Shane and I saw a naked woman," Rick chuckled as he shook his head, "I was able to blackmail Justin for months after that. I never had anything on Jeffery, though," I chuckled alongside him and couldn't help the feeling of happiness that flooded within me. Rick and I have been trying to learn each other's life stories and become closer, and each time we share stories like this, I can't help falling for the man. I looked at the man and felt my smile falter, knowing we couldn't hide our relationship from Carl any longer—things were intensifying.
"We need to tell Carl," I whispered, my eyes locking onto his face. Rick's smile fell, and he nodded, knowing we couldn't continue with the secrets.
"I know," He responded, "We'll find a time to talk to him. I don't know how he'll react." Carl could take the news two ways: Good or bad. He loves me, sure, but is that enough to accept me? I sure hope so.
"Dad! June!" I turned and saw Carl running towards us, tearing me out of my thoughts, "Where were you guys?" I smiled at the boy and motioned for him to come next to me, my arm immediately finding its way to his shoulder. He was already taller than I was, so this was going hard to do soon. Carl wrapped his arm around my shoulders and squeezed me, his finger poking my side and making me cringe.
"We were just patrolling around." I quickly thought up an excuse, my eyes going up to Rick as a smile broke across his face. Carl nodded and smirked as he started to drag me away, his giddiness getting the best of him.
"You should see the mess Daryl made!" Carl exclaimed as he ushered me forward and away from his father, "Judith is covered in food, and she exploded everywhere! When I left, Selena was screaming at him." I scrunched my face in disgust as I thought about the poop explosion I was about to face.
"Daryl is probably freaking out, huh?" I laughed as Carl gave me a devilish smile; he nodded excitedly as he continued to push me forward. I looked back and flashed Rick a quick wink as his son continued to push me along to see the mess I would have to clean up.
-Month 7-
"Happy Birthday to you," I sang as I carried three chocolate bars Michonne donated so Rick and I could do this. Carl sat in the common area, surrounded by almost everyone who resided in the prison; Rick, Judith, Selena, and Daryl sat next to him on the benches, "Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday, dear Carl; Happy Birthday to you." I placed the chocolate bars in front of him as we all cheered. A chorus of 'Happy Birthdays" and "Best wishes" sang throughout as Carl beamed at me. It wasn't much, but the thought counts, right? Carl stood on the steel table and thanked everyone, his smile contagious as he beamed at everyone.
Rick stood up, Judith in his arms, and approached me. His hand gripped mine tightly, soothing me as my heart pounded in my chest. We agreed that we'd tell Carl about us today, and I couldn't help but picture the worst. I told Selena to be on standby just in case. She found out about Rick and me just a week ago when she walked in on us, sharing a secret kiss in his cell. She was beyond ecstatic, which made me happy, but she wasn't the one who had to accept us. Carl sat back down and was immediately bombarded with gifts shoved in his face.
A smile spread across his face as he slowly opened them, saying thank you to each person until there weren't any more horribly wrapped gifts. He got a CD player that runs on batteries and a few CDs from Selena, a few comics from Glenn, Maggie, Hershel, and Daryl, some books from me, Rick, and Carol, and a few pieces of candy from others.
"14," Daryl smirked, "How's it feel, kid?" Carl chuckled and shook his head, his piercing blue eyes darting to the rugged man.
"No different than 13," Carl responded, his voice deep. I bit my lip and shook my head, still not used to his new voice. Finally, after a few months of cracking, it settled into its new tone. Carl stood up and approached me, his arms wrapped firmly around my shoulders as he squeezed me to him. "Gotta say, I'm loving the new height difference, though," He earned a few laughs from everyone surrounding and a poke in the gut from me. He was now about two inches taller than me and always had to rub it in my face that he didn't have to look up at me anymore.
"Hey, punk," I chuckled as I lightly punched him in the stomach, "Just 'cause you're taller doesn't mean you can bully me," Carl laughed and hugged me tightly.
He let go of me and took his place between Daryl and Selena, his hand grabbing Selena's as he showed her his new comics. I looked up at Rick and shared a smirk, watching his son blush and smile at the girl. We're going to have to keep a close eye on them. They're spending way too much time alone. I haven't missed those shy smiles, blushes, and small touches they shared. Now that Selena has hit puberty and Carl is entering the realm of a hormonal teenager, they're at major risk. I wasn't much older than them when I had my first sexual experience; the whole thing troubles me. What if they step forward and do the deed, and she gets pregnant? How are we going to deal with that? We barely manage with Judith! Woah, pump the breaks there, Gomez! You're getting way ahead of yourself!
Beth smiled at Rick as she approached him, her arms extending for Judith. Before she could take the baby, I tiptoed, kissed her chubby cheek, and watched Beth bounce her and walk toward the cells. Rick wrapped an arm around my shoulders and watched as his son continued to laugh with Selena, his cheeks a dark crimson as they talked animatedly about the new comic he got. Daryl approached me and shot me a small smile before glaring at Rick. Rick rolled his eyes and chuckled, his free hand clapping Daryl on the shoulder as he walked by. Daryl had accepted that Rick and I were together, but he thought that if he intimidated Rick occasionally, he'd remind him that I was under Daryl's constant protection.
We waited patiently as people slowly left the common area, shooting their last best wishes to Carl. When Selena finally left the area, Rick and I nodded at one another, deciding now was the time. As she passed, I wrapped her in my arms and kissed the top of her head, whispering for her to keep an ear out. She might be the only thing that calms him down if things go south. Rick sat down to Carl's left, and I sat to his right, my bottom lip catching between my teeth as my heart went haywire again. Carl looked between us and smirked, his hands extending onto the table before us as he relaxed.
"So, on my birthday, huh?" He smirked as he looked at me, his eyes flashing with a mischievous glint. I furrowed my brows and looked at Rick, confused about what Carl was saying. "Guys, I know." A nervous bubble formed in my stomach, and sweat started to form on the nape of my neck.
"W-w-what do you mean?" I stuttered as Carl sighed heavily. He looked at me and sat straight, his eyes darting between his father and me.
"Guys," Carl groaned, "I know you two are together, and I think it's great!" My mouth hung open at his revelation. How did he know? When did he find out? He thinks it's great!? A smile spread across my lips as I realized he was accepting me.
"How?" Rick questioned, his face contorted in confusion as he probably had the same questions I had. Carl sighed again and looked up at the ceiling with a small smile.
"It's not like you were exactly hiding it," Carl chuckled, "When did it happen?" I smirked at him and shook my head, wondering what he meant by we weren't exactly hiding it. The last time I checked, yes, we were.
"Four months ago," I answered, "What do you mean we weren't hiding it? Cause we were." Carl laughed and leaned into me, his head resting on my shoulder.
"I mean, the hand-holding, the hugging," Carl shrugged as he yawned, "Plus, I caught you two kissing about a month ago – got out of there so quick," He joked before continuing, "Figured you would tell me when you're ready," Rick and I shared a bewildered look. I couldn't help the scarlet that spread across my cheeks as I realized Carl had walked in on one of the secret meetings between his father and me. He's lucky that all he saw was a kiss. The thought made my cheeks flare.
"Carl," I began, unsure of my next words, "I-I want you to know that I'm not trying to replace your mom. I-I know that I will never be on the same level as her and that I'm just that woman that likes to boss you around sometimes, but—"
"Shut up, June," Carl interrupted. I looked at him and frowned, ready for him to yank his approval away from me, "In a way, you're like my mom—a step-mom. You've been like a mom to me since you first walked into camp. I love you, June." I felt the familiar sting of tears well up in my eyes as I pressed Carl to me. I pursed my lips and stroked his hair, my heart swelling with the love I had for these two men near me. I know he's growing, and he'll kill me if I continue calling him a kid, but he'll always be that little boy I met two years ago. "Don't tell me you're crying?" Carl teased as he looked up at me. I chuckled and wiped away the tears that trailed down my cheeks.
"Shut up," I teased, pressing his head back into my shoulder. He laughed and wrapped his arms around me, squeezing me tight. "I love you too, Carl," I whispered as I kissed his head. Rick stood up and wrapped his arms around us, a sigh of relief escaping him. I knew he was just as nervous about this as I was, and I'm sure he's happy that his son and I have a strong relationship. One thing is for sure: I love these two—and Judith—with every fiber of my being.