By the time Hawks had woken up the next morning, Dabi had already left him. He was no longer tied down, in fact, he had been moved to lay down on the mattress. The room was empty, no sign of the other man at all.
Hawks stretched a bit, cringing at the sharp pain that would shoot through his side whenever he moved it. With the wound stitched into his side, it hurt to move. Every single wrong turn would send pain all the way through his side, however he didn't make a sound. It wasn't the worst he's been through, and he doubts it will measure up against anything that will happen to him in the future.
Especially not when he was working with one of the world's worst villains to try and find even more powerful ones.
Hell, Hawks didn't have a single clue how he could have ever seen Dabi in a different light.
***
"Hey Birdie." Dabi purred into his ear, still holding him close. Hawks didn't feel as dirty as he did the night prior, despite easily being able to tell that he had just been lazily cleaned from the activities from the day before.
"Shut up." Hawks muttered in response, still hiding in his neck. He still smelled horrible, as if the stench of death was latching onto him. The scent of burning flesh was eating away at his nose, but he wasn't about to say anything about something Dabi couldn't control. Besides, they both needed to shower anyways.
"Aww, didn't you just say last night that you wanted me to be loud too?" He teased, running his warmed hands up and down Hawks' wings. The action caused the former to arch his back slightly, shivering.
Hawks immediately pushed Dabi away playfully.
"Oh fuck off. That was different."
"Oh really? It doesn't sound that different." He grinned, pulling at one of his feathers gently. He was immediately slapped with his wing.
"Not right now." He said, folding his wings back again.
"You not in the mood?"
"I'm sore." Hawks admitted, covering himself with his wings again to stay warm.
That was until Dabi began warming his body up, luring him back into his chest. Hawks stayed close, not daring to let him go. He was too warm.
"Hey firefly?"
"Hmm?"
"Do you love me?"
The question completely silenced the room. Dabi's breath hitched in the back of his throat. He started to loosen his hold on him.
"I'm not sure."
"What do you mean?"
"I'm not sure." He repeated. "I might. But it doesn't really matter."
"Why doesn't it matter?"
"We wouldn't be able to be together anyways. So it doesn't matter."
The answer sent a pang through his heart. Sure, he knew it was true. There was no chance for him to have any sort of normal relationship. Especially not with him. But hearing the words be said out loud just made the emotional pain ready to rip him open.
"Would you want to?"
"Do you?" He laughed obnoxiously.
"Yeah." Hawks said simply, looking down at the ground. He didn't say anything, not even when Dabi pulled away from him. "I'm sorry."
He still didn't say anything, moving to stand up. Keigo covered his body with his wings. He didn't want him to leave, not now.
Surprisingly, he felt Dabi's arms wrap around him before picking him up bridal style. He felt a kiss pressed to his forehead.
"Yes. If I was normal, I would want to. But you know that's impossible. At least, it's not possible right now." Another kiss on his temple, down to his cheek, his neck, before going up and kissing his lips gently. "But it will be. Promise."
Promise.
What a fucking stupid word.
How the hell was Hawks supposed to believe that when he couldn't keep a promise himself?
It was never going to happen. It was all going to end in flames. He was going to end up in flames.
"Birdie?"
***
"Birdie? Hawks? You alive in there?"
He was met with three semi rough taps on the side of his head.
"You alive?"
"Yes, yes I'm alive." Hawks snapped, glaring up at his attacker. He froze a bit when he saw the bag in his hand.
"No need to be so defensive, birdie. That's not how you treat the person who just got you something to eat." Dabi held the bag out a bit, dropping it on the mattress. "It's yours. Don't want you starving on me."
Hawks looked down at the paper bag before slowly starting to pull stuff out. First thing he pulled out was some water, which wasn't exactly something he had been without, but he was still happy. He then pulled out a small plastic sleeve of crackers. Last, but in his opinion the best thing in the bag was simply just a chicken sandwich.
Suddenly, whatever happiness he had from the bag was ripped away from him once Dabi took the sandwich away from him.
"This is mine. Forgot to get myself something while I was out." He shrugged a bit.
Hawks didn't complain. He only opened the crackers, slowly starting to eat them one at a time. He would glance over at Dabi only to notice that he still hadn't taken a bite before going back to his own food.
He finished the sleeve quickly, leaving almost nothing remaining. He had trained to go weeks without food, but even the crackers had been welcomed at that point. It was better than the slices of ham he would be given every single other time. The crackers were a nice break.
Of course, it wasn't like the ham was given to him just to be assholey about it. Dabi often ate the same as him, if not less than what he gave Hawks. So being petty that out of every other "meal" he had been given this one was the only one where Dabi got something better was stupid.
Did that mean that Hawks was above being petty?
No, no of course not.
So he simply didn't say another word, wrapping his wings around himself slightly as he continued to watch him start to pick at the sandwich.
He never seemed to eat much, yet the sandwich was gone before long. He didn't really know what he was expecting. A part of him thought that at least he would've been given the rest, and yet he finished it all.
At that point, he was too locked into his thoughts to notice Dabi had asked him a question until he got flicked lightly in the forehead.
"Hey!" He rubbed the spot, still on edge.
"I was talking to you."
"And I obviously wasn't paying attention."
"Of course you weren't." He rolled his eyes a bit. "And here I thought I was going to give you something for attempting to bring Toga back here. I guess that you just don't feel like listening anymore."
"What do you want?" Hawks rolled his eyes a bit. He could care less what he had to give him.
"Do you love me still, little bird?"
Hawks was frozen, staring up right info Dabi's eyes.
"What?"
"You heard me. Do you still love me?"
He didn't respond. He didn't know how he could respond. Yes, yes I do. After all the shit I have been through, I still love you. What sort of touch starved, desperate teenager did he turn into?
"I, don't know."
Dabi only hummed a bit, standing back up from the floor. Hawks watched quietly as he stood back up, grabbing onto a separate bag that Hawks had not seen when he came in. Without another word, the bag was set down in front of Hawks.
He didn't come close to the bag at first, looking up at Dabi every few seconds before it was pushed closer to him.
Cautiously, he pulled another sandwich from the bag. He didn't get his hopes up, looking back up at Dabi.
"That one's yours." He clarified. "You need to eat more if you're going to be helpful."
Hawks didn't ask any other questions, excitedly digging into the sandwich.
***
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