chapter 12 - tears and fears
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"Tell me what happened." Clarke stated, clearly confused but also relieved to hear that the Flame wasn't within Ontari's reach.
And so, after feeling like Dakota had gotten far enough away from the city, Titus sighed, before diving into what he and Kota had talked about before she went M.I.A from the tower...
(flashback)
"Titus, may I have a word?" Dakota asked, as she made her way into his sacred room.
The man was gently wiping off the blood from the flame, after just recently extracting it from Lexa's flesh, but he quickly turned his attention to the young girl. "Of course, Sisheda." [Sister of the Commander]
Dakota sighed at the formal name he gave her. He rarely referred to her in such a way unless he was around the Commander herself, or he just wanted something. So, considering the fact that Lexa was no longer there, she knew it was the latter.
"Look," She huffed. "I know you want my forgiveness, Titus—"
"—I beg for it." He pleaded with desperation, and Kota could clearly see the pain and guilt written on his face.
"And I understand that, Titus, but no more than an hour ago you put a bullet through my sister and killed her. " She gritted, trying not to let fresh tears form. She came there for a reason, so she couldn't get distracted by her emotions now. "I know that the incident of harming Lexa was unintentional, but you had every intention in harming the one that she loved, and I'm not okay with that either."
Her words instantly caused regret to flash in Titus' eyes, knowing she was right. It wasn't fair for him to request forgiveness so soon. She still needed time to grieve and he knew that he had no right to rush her when it was due to his actions that she was in that predicament to begin with.
"Tell me," Kota continued on. "Lexa loved me deeply. In a different way than she did Clarke, because I was her blood. Her family. So, what did that mean for me, huh? Was I supposed to be next on your hit list? Should I have expected to awaken tomorrow with a bullet of my own?" She gritted, causing Titus' eyes to instantly widened drastically.
"Of course not, Dakota! You know I would never hurt you!
"Oh, do I?" She scoffed.
"Please," Titus spoke quietly. "You may not be able to forgive me just yet, but at least believe me when I tell you that I would never intentionally harm you or Lexa. Yes, it is my duty to protect the flame and the Commander who bares it, but I loved your sister like she was my own daughter. I taught her and watched her grow. I was wrong to believe that having you back in her life could weaken her. You only made her stronger. In the end, I was mistaken, and Lexa helped me to realize that, so I apologize."
Kota shook her head, not necessarily at Titus, but at herself. Her reasoning for meeting him in the sacred room wasn't so that she could let her emotions get the best of her. No, it was because she wasn't going to let Lexa's teachings go to waste.
She wasn't going to cower away from her responsibilities and what was expected of her. All of her life she wanted to prove herself, and even though Lexa told her that she already had time and time again, becoming the next Commander just seemed like the final step.
Of course, the idea of becoming Heda still made her feel uncomfortable, like she was unworthy of such a title. However, no matter what they called her, she knew that her duty was to protect her people. It was in her blood afterall. Plus, she knew that their best chance at protecting Skaikru was if she carried the flame. She did trust Aden, but in the end she felt that he was just a boy. Kota saw what Lexa was like after having her childhood stolen away from her in order to become a ruler, and she didn't want that for the Aden.
However, if Aden wasn't the one to ascend, she knew who would be. Ontari had been plotting on the throne ever since the Ice Queen last walked around Polis. When Azgeda were to gain the knowledge that her sister was dead, she knew that Ontari would put herself in the conclave and win, no matter what she did to come out victorious.
Dakota could not let that happen, so she vowed to protect the flame until a better fit Commander could carry it. If that meant carrying it herself, then so be it. However, before she would have to succumb to those measures, she had one more idea. It involved a person that Lincoln had told her about many months ago.
"Never-mind what we had been discussing." Kota quickly dismissed the previous conversation, finally gaining her composure once more. "The reason I came down here, was because I need you to tell me everything you know about the eighth novitiate that was in my sister's class during her own conclave."
Dakota's words confused Titus at first, but he soon caught on to what she was getting at. He nodded his head, and placed the flame in a locket, before resting it in the young girl's hands.
"Her name is Luna." He began.
(end of flashback)
"Wait, the eighth circle." Clarke realized, after hearing Titus retell the conversation he had with Kota earlier that day. "Lexa had markings on her back for every life she took at her conclave. Seven circles. Only Kota's right, Lexa told me that there were eight novitiates in her class. What did happen to number eight? There's another Natblida, isn't there?"
"Yes." Titus admitted. "But she fled. She's a coward and a traitor to the blood. Lexa refused to let me hunt her down. She's unworthy of the flame, which s what I already told Kota when she asked about her.
"So what happened then?"
"Kota made a valid point that Ontari is even more unworthy. So, I gave Kota the flame because she said that Lincoln told her where Luna is residing. Her plan is to present the flame to Luna upon finding her, but even I know that Luna won't accept it. Which is why I'm hoping that during the journey, Kota will realize that the only true person to carry the spirit of the Commanders is none other than herself."
Clarke nodded in agreement, but before she could respond, muffled shouting could be heard outside, resulting in Murphy tumbling down the stairs and into the threshold.
"Arghh!" He grunted, clutching his arm in pain. "...Ontari's here."
At that, Titus quickly ordered Clarke to hide, and she did so just in time before Ontari came barging into the room.
"How dare you bring Skaikru into the Order of the Flame!" She spat. However, Titus wasn't fazed in the slightest.
"It's what Lexa wanted." He replied, monotonously.
"Well, Lexa's not Heda anymore." She remarked, before chuckling in realization. "Thanks to you. Anyways, let's get this ascension over with."
"You must be cleansed before you ascend." Titus reminded her, before he ordered Murphy to take her to the Commander's chambers to perform the ritual.
Once the two left, with Murphy being practically forced, Clarke finally came out of her hiding spot.
"Thank you." She spoke, and Titus nodded courtly before looking at her with all seriousness.
"Clarke. You and Octavia must help Dakota realize her destiny of carrying the flame. For some reason she's still hesitant and I'm afraid only the both of you can find out why. So go with her to give Luna the flame, but when she won't accept it, help Kota realize that she's our only hope. She's now the Fleimkepa, but we need her to become more than just it's keeper. We need her to be it's ascender..."
It was surely going to be a difficult task, but Clarke nodded nonetheless, knowing the urgency and importance that was involved. So with nothing more to discuss, Titus gave her a disguise and the blonde successfully left Polis unseen.
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By the next morning, Pike was already making his way over to the prison confinement before the sun was even rising. He arrived there shortly, with a group of guards following behind him.
"It's time." He immediately declared, causing panic to set in, though the three men hid it well. Amongst the other grounders in the cell with them, Denae approached Lincoln with worry in her eyes, which he noticed.
"Emo komba hir na ban ai we kom nau. Yu nou souda kok au." [They're here to take me away now. You must not resist." Lincoln informed her.
"Ai sou nou na shil emo op thau yu." [I can't protect them without you.] She exclaimed, but he only assured her that she was a warrior, and that she needed to stay strong until Dakota could find a way to free them.
Soon, the cell door was opened, and Pike ordered them to back up against the wall, leaving Lincoln, Kane, and Sinclair front and center. The three were quickly restrained and dragged away through the halls of the Ark, where they would meet their fate outside.
"Make way!" Pike commanded, upon passing Harper in the hallways. The girl did as he said, but when they walked by, she stared at Kane with lingering eye contact, secretly telling him that there was a plan in action to free them. And after Pike and his men were out of sight, Harper pulled out her radio.
"Package is on the move." She whispered, urgently. "I repeat, package is on the move. We are a go. Okay, S, is your team in position?"
However, Monty and his mother were listening in and heard every word.
"Okay, S?" Hannah repeated in question, looking towards her son who was feeling the guilt of betraying his friends.
"Roger that." Octavia's voice cut through the static. "We're in position and ready to intercept."
"O.K.S," Hannah realized. "Octavia kom Skaikru..." She quickly grabbed her walkie-talkie in order to warn Pike. "Sir, you were right. Octavia Blake is here, and she's not alone."
At this piece of information, Pike suddenly turned around in a flash and instantly ordered the prisoners on their knees.
"Can you confirm a location?" He asked over the radio.
"Negative, Sir."
"Sir," Miller's boyfriend, Bryan, spoke up. "We can only assume her friends have already told her where we're taking them. We shouldn't go any further 'till we know the route's secure."
Pike nodded, knowing he was right, and glanced over to the nearest room, deciding to keep the three men in there until they could figure out where Octavia and the others were. "I want two men guarding the door. If anyone comes out of there, shoot to kill. Anyone enters this corridor, one warning, then shoot to kill. Everyone else follow me."
With a look of determination, the group stormed down the hall, leaving only two guards at the door. Fortunately, one of the men was Bryan, and when it was safe to do so, he injected a syringe into the other guard's neck, affectively making him unconscious. He then followed the rest of the plan by laying on the floor and pretending that he was unconscious as well.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the door, the three men stood in surprise when one of the tiles on the floor suddenly moved out of its place, and Dakota peaked her head through.
"Get in." She ordered them with out so much as a greeting, and the men didn't waste any time following her commands, though they were certainly confused as to how they would all fit.
Underneath the floor, it was cramped and tight as they waited for Pike and his men to return to the room, however, they would wait there for hours if it meant there was a chance for them not to die that day. The four of them kept quiet, and looked towards Kota, waiting for her queue since she apparently knew the plan.
However, the way Lincoln was staring at her was different from Kane and Sinclair. It was almost like he was studying her expression because he sensed there was something wrong. Or maybe, something happened that he didn't know about. Either way, he chose not to mention anything just yet, and instead, kept his gaze locked on her.
Within a few minutes, they could hear Pike and his men stomp through the halls and into the corridor.
"Check those guards and call medical." He huffed, before barging into the room, only to see that it was completely empty. "Damn!" He shouted, as he kicked the nearest table out of frustration.
"The guys are alive, sir. They must've drugged them."
Pike's frown only deepened as he shook his head. "We did exactly what they wanted us to do. That won't happen again." He stated, determinedly, before they all followed him back out of the corridor.
Once the coast was clear, Dakota moved the tile once more and stuck her head out. "All clear." She smirked, before climbing out. The others followed suit, while Miller, Octavia, and Abby rounded the corner.
Dakota quickly went up to her brother, and started untying his restraint's. Her eyes were focused and she didn't even look up at him, so Lincoln automatically knew there was something that she wasn't telling him. Perhaps, she didn't tell anyone, because she barely could look at anyone else in the room. In her mind, she was only thinking about helping her brother out of there and she couldn't afford to think of anything else.
Specially, her sister dying only two days ago...
Kota was feeling major anxiety over the whole becoming Commander thing, and the idea of possibly losing two siblings, though she hid her distress well. Or at least, she thought so. Really, Lincoln and Octavia both knew something was wrong with the girl, but they also knew it was not the time to question her about it.
"We're going to come back for Denae and the others." Kota whispered, finally looking up at her brother. "I won't stand by and let our people suffer."
Suddenly, Octavia's radio went off as Harper's words echoed throughout the room.
"O.K.S, come in."
Dakota and Octavia quickly glanced at each other in concern, causing the others to look at them in question.
"What is it?" Lincoln was the one to ask.
"This wasn't the plan." Octavia informed them. "We used their frequencies so they could hear us." She then spoke into her radio. "Go ahead."
"Stay where you are. I repeat. Stay where you are. The exit is not clear."
Dakota's eyes widened as she walked over to Octavia, before taking the radio herself. "How many guards?" She asked worriedly.
"Too many. I said stay put." Harper whispered, before she quickly hid herself in the escape hatch as guards walked by.
Meanwhile, Hannah Green was rejoicing as she continued listening to their conversation through Monty's radio. "They're trapped." She smirked, however, Monty didn't share it. He was actually worried about his friends, even more so, he was worried about the guards finding Harper. Quickly, he reached for the radio and turned it on.
"Calling all guards! The prisoners are headed for the main gate! The prisoners are headed for the main gate! Over!"
"Monty!" Hannah gasped, grabbing onto his arm. "What are you doing?"
"I'm saving my friends." He replied, without hesitation.
"But your friends are traitors."
Monty looked up at his mother, pointedly. "Then I guess I'm one, too."
At that, Pike and a few guards entered the room with them.
"How many men do we have at the main gate?" Pike instantly questioned, but Hannah sighed and decided not to snitch on her son.
"Sir, we just got word. That was another false report."
Pike's face grew with even more frustration after the guards radioed in and confirmed nothing was at the main gate.
"Lock this camp down." He ordered the guards who were with him. We're going door to door. Go!" They left to do just as he said, and when they left, Pike then turned towards Monty and Hannah. "In the meantime, let's see if we can't bring them to us..."
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The fake information that Monty relayed over the radio, allowed Dakota and the others the time to make it to the exit hatch safely. On the way, all Kota could think was how close they were to the so-called finish line. Soon, it would be one less thing to worry about and another thing to cross off the list.
You see, when they made it back to the cave, her goal was to finally inform everyone about the unfortunate passing of her sister, and how she had to find Luna quickly. None of them knew that Dakota was carrying the sacred flame in the locket around her neck. Even as she gripped onto it so tightly whenever the stress overwhelmed her, they still failed to take notice. Or if they did, they didn't mention it, which she was grateful for.
As they opened the secret escape hatch, one by one, they climbed into it, only leaving Kane, Octavia, and the two grounder siblings. Abby decided to stay at Arkadia to help the others so she had already left, which meant that only the four of them had to climb in the hatch. But just as they were about to, Pike's threatening voice cut through their radio.
"I have a message for the traitors in this camp." He began, clearing already having lost his patience. "There will be an execution today. Either turn yourselves in, or the Grounder prisoners die in your place."
Lincoln and Dakota quickly frowned as they made eye contact with one another. They knew that they couldn't leave after hearing that threatening ultimatum. They were both raised in a way that meant to never leave anyone behind. It was alright for them to leave previously, because they had the goal of coming back to free the others. However, now that those Grounder's innocent lives hung in the balance, it was like Pike would do anything in order to get his way. No matter if the other party was guilty or not.
It only proved how unfair and merciless he truly was.
"That son of a bitch..." Kota hissed, as she glared down at the radio. She just knew the bastard was somewhere in the Ark smirking to himself.
"Lets go." Octavia urged them, already fearing what they were thinking. So, when the two siblings didn't budge her anxiety sky rocketed.
"Dakota," Lincoln whispered to her, a lump already forming in his throat. "This only ends one way—"
"No!" She instantly cut him off. "Don't you dare go there, alright? I'm sure we can figure this out. We have to."
Kota was shaking from nerves and her tears were already forming. She knew deep down in her heart that there was no way everyone was getting out of here alive. But she was at a complete crossroad. Allow a handful of innocent lives to be murdered, or allow her brother to die, the only member of her family still left alive.
"Ai strisis," He spoke softly, unknowingly using the same nickname that Lexa had for her, which caused the crack in her heart to split even further. "I can't let them die because of me."
"Well then I'll come with you!" She stated, causing Octavia to instantly oppose the idea. "We can free the others and fight our way out! Please!" Kota begged desperately, as the tears finally fell from her eyes. "I-I can't lose you too, Link. Please, don't leave me..."
He furrowed his eyebrows at her words, wondering who else she had lost. However, he just assumed that she was referring to the both sets of parents she had lost when she was little, her biological family as well as Lincoln's mother.
"Oso throu daun ogeda." She added, making Lincoln slightly smirk at her. [We fight together.]
"Come here." He whispered, looking deeply into her bloodshot eyes as tears of his own formed. He quickly pulled Dakota into his arms, which took her off guard, though she didn't complain.
Ever since she witnessed Lexa's life leave her body, all she wanted was to be back in her older brother's arms. A place she had literally grown to associate with comfort and protection. She learned to come to him for any problems she was facing and so she wanted—no, needed—to ask for his advice on Luna and becoming Commander. She knew that he would know what to do in the matter.
He always did.
"I love you, Sis." He mumbled into her hair, before kissing the top of her head. She smiled and uttered the same, as she held on to him tighter, finally getting some of her hope back.
"But, I vowed to always protect you until the very end." He stated, voice cracking in the process. "And I intend to keep my promise to you and to Lexa."
"Wha—"
Before Dakota could even ask what he meant by that, Lincoln lifted a syringe from his pocket and quickly plunged it into her neck making her gasp.
"no..—" She managed to mumble incoherently, before passing out right there in Lincoln's arms.
"What are you doing?" Kane questioned him, as Octavia rushed to her side.
"The same thing you would do for your people and the one you love." Was Lincoln's reply, as he carefully placed Dakota's limp body into the man's arms. "Just get her out of here."
"She'll be devastated." Octavia shook her head, looking down at the girl she loved.
"She'll be okay." Lincoln assured her, "She's strong. Just get her out of here, and make sure you remind her that none of this was her fault. You know how she is, always blaming herself for everything." He wiped the last of his tears, before kissing Kota's forehead one last time.
After that, he walked out of the corridor and into the hallway, just as Kane and Octavia made it safety through the hatch with an unconscious Kota. It didn't take very long for guards to come running in every direction upon having caught sight of Lincoln. However, the Grounder wasn't afraid at all. Instead, he spread out his arms and offered himself up willingly, sacrificing his life for the many who still lived.
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Everyone knows what it's like to wake up from a nightmare. You almost always feel a sense of fear and panic. A dreadful, intensity that lingers in the stomach for a few minutes until you finally turn on the light and take a deep breath, realizing that you're okay, and everything is alright.
Only for Kota, it wasn't that simple, because she had unfortunately experienced the complete opposite from that. As she rested in her unconscious state, she felt calm, peaceful, and absolutely foreign to her mind and thoughts. Unable to comprehend pain and anything related to it.
However, when she woke up, that calming state soon turned into one of alarm and panic. Her eyelids opened and instantly she saw trees and sky, all while feeling her weight being carried by her horse, Athena, up a mountain.
To her right, Octavia was walking, and to her left, Kane was there too. She looked up and saw Sinclair and the others leading them, but someone was missing. Quickly, all of the recent memories hit her like a truck and she moved to get off the horse, but fell onto the ground instead.
"Lincoln..." She grunted, rubbing her shoulder. "W-where's my brother?" Kota asked, as she stumbled over to the cliff's edge. No one in the group attempted to stop her, frankly, because they didn't know what to do, they were completely torn.
Having to witness the sight in front of her, was like laying trapped in a box that was rapidly filling with water.
She couldn't move.
She couldn't breath.
She couldn't even think properly.
It was absolute torture. Down below, she saw Lincoln being pushed to his knees, as Pike stood over him like he was a butcher waiting to slaughter fresh meat.
"No..." Dakota choked, shaking her head in disbelief. Her vision began to blur due to the constant flow of tears clouding it. Maybe it was beneficial that they did though. Afterall, then she wouldn't have to see the events happening before her eyes.
"Lincoln of Trikru," Pike began, out of earshot to the group on the mountain. "You have been sentenced to death, in accordance with the Exodus Charter. Any last words?"
Lincoln's eyebrows were furrowed, not with anger necessarily, but with determination rather. Just as Lexa, he felt that he had fulfilled his duty in protecting Leilani kom Trikru, just as he promised.
Having the ability to teach her and watch her grow into the plangona [woman warrior] she was today, was the thing he was most proud of. Being able to witness her find a different form of love with a person who was just as strong, made him know that she would be okay no matter what. Plus, he felt rest assured that Lexa and Octavia would take care of her.
So, with that thought in mind, he looked Pike in the eyes. "Not for you." He simply replied, before directing his gaze over to the mountain tops.
Meanwhile, Dakota's heart was literally ripping at the seams, as Octavia ran up to her and held onto her, trying to get her to look away. She knew that Kota's last memories of Lincoln shouldn't be his execution, yet, the girl didn't budge when Octavia grabbed her. Instead, she looked directly at Lincoln, meeting his determined eyes as one final act of goodbye.
"May we meet again." She saw Lincoln mouth to her from afar, and within a instant, Kota heard a loud gunshot pierce the air, reminding her just how much damage a single bullet can cause.
*B A N G*
Kota quickly closed her eyes with such force that she saw a combination of stars and tears. They may have been meters away from the scene, but she could still hear the way her brother's limp body collapsed into the muddied puddle beneath him, and it was absolutely devastating.
First Lexa, now Lincoln. Both gone by a man with a gun. Just a single human with a weapon so small, yet so lethal, in it's entirety. Only a makeshift murderer with a trigger for an accomplice.
And it was in that moment, Dakota had come to the realization that she absolutely loathed guns and all those who chose to own one.
Because that single sound broke her heart into millions of pieces and made her soul burst into flames.
Kota had indeed awoken to a nightmare, rather than escaping one, and sadly, she was unable to find her way out of the dark. Yes, there was a light flickering in the near distance, but she just couldn't reach it. Not yet anyways.
Unfortunately, Dakota was trapped in a terrifying nightmare where the lingering void of darkness consumed her, and the monster under the bed was slowly eating her alive, leaving the poor girl desperately wanting to wake up...
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A/N:
Dakota is about to go through some MAJOR character development and i'm so here for it! but let's just take a moment of silence for this amazing sibling trio...😭