TRIGGER WARNING
Marinette's POV
Ring Ring Ring
"Ugh just five more minutes," I said. Wait, is that an alarm, but my alarm only goes off for school? Then that means, shit I have school today. I think as I jump off my bed and ram my head into the ceiling. "Ow ow ow, welp here's to a great morning." I roll my eyes as I walk to my closet and get out my clothes for the day. The same pink jeans, weird gray-brown coat, and my white floral shirt. As I head to the bathroom I let my mind wonder, will this year be the same as always? Will my feelings for Adrien cloud my judgment in situations and make me incapable of speaking to him? Will Lila finally give up and stop lying? Will Chloe stop being a stuck up brat? Will Adrien finally like me? I blush at the thought of me and him ever being together. Our three children, Emma, Louis, and Hugo, and our hamster. It would be perfect. Just the thought of seeing him today makes me nervous, but I need to get over it and start to get ready for the day. As I hop in the shower I feel a familiar sting but it's just my mind playing tricks. I promised Alya I wouldn't do it again, but still the scars are there reminding me everyday of what I have caused. I push the thoughts away and focus on getting ready. After I use my favorite vanilla soaps I hop out of the shower and brush my teeth. Looking at the clock I have, 15 MINUTES!!! Where did all my time go? I rush through brushing my teeth and hair while also attempting to put my clothes on correctly. Rushing downstairs and through the bakery I grab a croissant and start my journey to school. At the front of the school I finish my food while patiently waiting for Alya to arrive. The waiting makes my head spin and my thoughts take over my senses. Will everyone look different? Will Chloe and Lila still bully me? Will everyone still be together or will they all have broken up with each other? Will there be any new kids? What if I make- My thoughts are interrupted by Alya pulling me into a bone crushing hug. "Alya what the hell you're crushing me!" I say. She lets go and I finally catch a very much needed breath. "Girl I missed you so much, wait- YOUR HAIR!" Alya screams at me. "Wait what's wrong with my hair, is it messy, did I not brush it, what if Adrien sees it looking like a mess? Alya help me!!!" I sputter my words out. I reach for my backpack to grab a mirror when my hand is pulled away. "Alya what the hell are you doing?! I need to fix my hair!" I scream at her while trying to free my hand from her grasp. "Girl stop your hair looks fine, but since when did you start wearing it down?" Alya asks looking puzzled. Wait- down, I could have sworn I put my hair up this morning. After replaying all the motions I went through today I realize I never put it up I was in such a rush that I completely forgot. "Alya do you have any hair ties, it's urgent" I ask with a pleading tone. "Sorry girl but you're out of luck, you know I don't wear my hair up so I don't carry them around," Alya says. No, no, no. This can't be happening, it's the first day of school and I'm gonna embarrass myself. Why is this happening to me, I did everything right, its karma, right? Think Marinette, think. It's not worth the stress, it's just hair, I'm sure no one will notice. "Hurry up Mari or we are gonna be late!" Alya pulls me out of my head and we run to Physics together. I run into the room and take my normal seat in the second row beside Alya, trying not to pull any attention to myself. I didn't have the time to glance around the room and see everyone because Mrs. Mendeleiev walks in and tells us to pull out notebooks and she starts with the lesson. She starts to take roll calls while I'm off in my own little world. Picturing Adrien and I sitting under the stars on my balcony just being in each other's company. It's perfect, I can practically hear him calling my name. "Marinette, Marinette, Marinette," Adrien says. Wait- that's not in my head, all of the sudden I pull myself out of my thoughts only to see everyone staring at me like I've gone crazy. "I'm sorry what's happening," I say looking at everyone dazed. "Marinette Dupain-Cheng," Mrs. Mendeleiev says in an authoritative tone. "Yes I'm here, present," I say, embarrassing myself in front of the whole class. Alya gives me a side glance saying that I need to get out of my head and focus. I sigh and concentrate on the rest of the lesson. Physics goes by in a slow blur, it's just a bunch of mumbling and science and laws and stuff I won't remember. The next thing I know is Alya is pulling me out of class and into the locker room. I just can't seem to get out of my head until I run into someone and knock the books out of their hands. I quickly bend down to pick them up while sending out apology after apology. I finally look up and it's like there is nothing around me but blue. Eyes and hair as blue as the sky, oh god I'm falling. Suddenly I'm tripping over my own feet and actually falling, only to be caught by the mysterious boy in blue. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, I'm really clumsy, I didn't mean to trip, or run into you. I just was pulled and fell, and my head and blue and, I'm sorry," I stammered while staring into his blue eyes that seemed to put me in a trance. I quickly shook my head and got out of my thoughts to help him pick up his books. After helping him he gave me his hand and helped me onto my feet. "Thank you, sorry what's your name?" I asked, trying to be polite and not creepy. "Oh well I'm Luka Couffaine, I'm new here, but my sister is Juleka the tall girl with purple hair, you may know her." The blue eyed boy said. "Oh I know Juleka, she's an amazing friend, but she never told me she had a brother. Well it's nice to meet you Luka. I'm Ma-Ma-Marinette. Sorry for crashing into you and knocking your stuff out of your hands and thank you for helping me up." I said in a kind and friendly manner. "It's nice to meet you too Marinette and Juleka doesn't talk much about me because I was in America, I just came back a little over a week ago. Still trying to remember where everything is, and thank you for helping me pick up my books. Also I'm sorry for bumping into you, I wasn't paying attention." Luka said. We just stared at each other not knowing what to say or what to do until I heard someone cough. I almost tripped and fell again but was caught by Luka for the second time. "I'm sorry again for my clumsiness but if you need someone to guide you around the city or someone to hang out with you can call me, I'm sure Juleka could give you my number. But unfortunately I have to go and change for my gym class, but just give me a call sometime," I say in a rush to get away from the boy who is utterly captivating. "Oh okay, well thank you again and I will let you get to class, bye Ma-Ma-Marinette." He says in a teasing tone and rushes off. Oh god what have I gotten myself into. I rush to my locker and quickly change seen as I am already late. I see Alya running the track and catch up to her, she glances at me in a questioning way. I give her a look that says 'I don't know what you are talking about'. "Okay cut the crap Marinette, who was that and what was that look you gave to him. It looked like you forgot where you were and what you were doing." Alya asks in a questioning and curious manner. Words, come one Marinette think of words. Stupid brain, I'm gonna kill you. "W-well that was L-luka, Juleka's brother. When you pulled me I guess I ran into him and knocked his books over,so I helped him and then I was surrounded by blue. Blue eyes and hair like the sky, oh god so blue," I say like a lovesick puppy. "So blue I couldn't help but stare and get lost in his eyes, oh god! Alya I told him to call me if he needed a friend or something. What have I done!" I say exasperated and embarrassed. "You talked to him? Did you stutter? Did you tell him your name? What did you say? Do you like him? Was he nice? Girl, I need the details!!!" Alya rushes her words as she gasps for breath while we continue to run the track. "Break, water, something. I can't breathe. Too many emotions, oh god I made a fool of myself. What if he thinks I'm a klutz or some clumsy girl? What if he doesn't want to be friends? What if he is a douche and spreads rumors about the girl who ran into the new kid? What if he turns Juleka against me? What if he hates me? Alya what have I done, I have to avoid him. I embarrassed myself so much." I say stopping to catch my breath. Ranting is tiring, I need a nap, maybe some water and a break. "Girl are you okay? I think you're having a panic attack. Adrien, Nino please hurry and get some water for Marinette!" Alya yells across the track. My vision is not blue but black. Spots are dancing like the ballet, spinning and twirling just all around. My chest is as tight as the rope I walk across. It's gonna snap and the black will take over. I'm heaving, my chest goes up and down. I feel the grass beneath my hands, some left over dew from the morning that hasn't dried. I've fallen I think but the blue didn't catch me, but green. Not eyes, not hair, just the grass. I feel it pricking my skin, I'm holding on to the sensation, the feel of nature against my body. The black wont overcome me. I see it dancing across my vision, Alya by my side, Adrien and Nino running to me, the dewy grass beneath my hands, and the track red and white around. I feel the wind being knocked out of me as I fight for oxygen, The feel of the ground beneath my body, Alya's hand on my back, and water sliding down my throat. Water, its cold and refreshing. It's calming like the wind that blows in my face in the morning. Suddenly a rush of oxygen in my lungs, the black fades to reveal eyes. How many? I count and 28 bright eyes staring at me, some filled with worry, others with hate. I breathe in a calming breath, I steady myself as I stand. Waiting for someone to tell me what happened and why everyone is staring at me. Then it hit me like a brick wall, it happened again. I've embarrassed myself once again in front of everyone. I have got to get out, too many eyes, I'm closed in and sinking fast. The black comes back and the weight is heavier than I remember. I push through the crowd and run for the bathroom, only to once again run into the blue. I'm caught, trapped in limbs, surrounded by arms. They are grounding me but holding me back. I'm here but not, it's like outer space, and my name. I hear my name, the voice is pleading and different, unfamiliar, but it's like I know it. "Marinette, please answer. One, breathe in." The voice says, and I do. One breath in only for him to say, "Two, breathe out." It continues till I'm steady and grounded, my senses are back and my mind is no longer foggy, my vision no longer clouded by black but now surrounded by the familiar sky blue. "L-luka? What are you doing here? Wait- what am I doing here? Exactly where is here?" I stutter as I am utterly confused and oblivious to my situation. "Woah, calm down. We are by the locker room, and you ran into me. You were having a panic attack, and if you don't mind me asking, do you have them often? Of course you don't have to tell me, you just met me but yeah i'll stop talking now." Luka stops and looks away from me with a faint blush on his cheeks. "Oh, im sorry but I don't think we should have this conversation. I'm not in the right mental state and I just met you. I mean I trust you, I think, I'm just confused as to what is going on and where is Alya?" I question while frantically looking around trying to find my bestfriend. I can hear someone saying my name, Alya. "Marinette are you in here?" She sputters out sounding worried. "Alya I'm over by the bathroom, and I'm okay." I say honestly. I'm grounded by the boy in blue next to me, and now I'm crushed by my best friend for the second time today. Then the air fills my lungs and I'm dragged away, I give Luka a hasty goodbye and a thank you. He nods in acknowledgment and walks away giving me and Alya privacy. The conversation is mostly one sided, Alya asking the questions and me nodding my head or answering in short sentences. Then she asks the weirdest thing of all, "So you like him?" My heart beats faster at the mention of him, not the boy with the brightest green eyes but the new boy in blue. It takes a minute for my brain to register the question being asked but before I can think of anything logical my heart decides to do the talking and I sputter out a quick yes. Before I think I'm running to my locker and changing out of the sweaty clothes covered in grass, trying to avoid my bestfriend and her pesky questions. I'm once again surrounded by my mind and my thoughts take over, soon being interrupted by an annoying yet joyous sound. The bell.
Ring Ring Ring
It's eleven o'clock, I just have to wait until Miss Bustier's class is over and then it's lunch. Once again I take my normal seat on the second row, but for the third year in a row Chloe makes a fuss about me sitting in 'her seat.' I think about what could happen if I stay seated or I move, but I have no time to think before I'm being forced out of the seat by none other than Chloe herself. With Chloe and Sabrina now sitting in me and Alya's seats we have no choice but to move. Since Lila joined our class two years ago we have had an odd number of people in our class, meaning someone sits alone. With Lila's fake diseases she sits in the front next to Adrien, Juleka and Rose, Kim and Max, Ivan and Mylene, Alya and Nino, Nathaniel and Alix, and then there is me, by myself in the back. Here's to a whole year of loneliness, yay. We get roll calls done and I manage not to zone out, but once the lesson starts my brain is scattered. I'm blindly taking notes not paying attention, all I can think about is blue, and the hint of green lingering in the back of my mind. His eyes are captivating, I feel as if I am lost in a sea when I look into them. His hand in my hand as he helped me up off the ground, the tremors that shook my body at the contact. It was like fire licked my entire body and it was hot. The room was hot, his hand was burning but a cold burn that made my insides do a flip. I felt like my blood was frozen but boiling, my skin was peeling off my body, and my clothes were thrown about as he mentally undressed me with his stare. He was shocking like an electric current that passed through me as we touched, it jolted my senses and made me feel alive. My core felt white hot with the sparks that ignited me. The boy in blue awakened something inside of me, it felt as if I let something go or perhaps someone. The green eyed boy was nearly a memory in the back of my mind, gone were the thoughts from this morning. They were now forgotten or have simply moved to a different level. He is no longer taking over my thoughts, no longer claiming my senses. Freedom, is this what it feels like to have a weight lifted off your shoulders and no longer feel that tie towards someone who will never reciprocate. If so, I want this feeling forever, I can live now. Shit,the notes, the class. I jump out of my head and focus on what's in front of me, but it's not a lesson, it's green eyes. Staring at me like I'm lost and they are trying to find me. "Adrien, you scared me," I jumped away startled by the closeness. "S-sorry Marinette, are you okay? You ran out of gym and didn't look too well. I came to find you but Alya told me that you would be fine, and just now you seemed lost or like out of it." Adrien said with a worried expression painted across his face. "Of course I'm alright, I just got lost in my head and had a panic attack earlier but Luka helped me. Just now I was once again lost in my head, sometimes I just go in there to hide out and think about things." I say honestly, but the expression that crosses his face as I mention Luka is puzzling. He snaps out of it and says it's time for lunch, then rushes off with a hasty goodbye. I'm left there wondering how long I was trapped in my thoughts, but then am interrupted by the sound of my growling stomach. Time for lunch I guess. As I make my way to the courtyard for lunch I notice Luka sitting by himself and then there is Alya waving me over to her, Nino, and Adrien. I can't help but want to sit with the boy in blue, he looks like he could use some company. Compromise, I rush over to Alya's table and ask her to come sit with Luka and I. She immediately agrees and gathers our friends. We make our way over to Luka and I ask him if we can sit and have lunch together. He says yes with a smile on his face and we all eat together in peace. We chatted about the first day and how I embarrassed myself by running into him. It's nice to sit with friends again, but something gets me thinking. Why am I not stuttering while talking to Adrien? Have I finally gained the confidence to speak to him with being a total mess? Am I comfortable around him now that I've stopped becoming a blubbering mess in his presence? Or have I simply just accepted the fact that it wont work and I am getting over him? Once again trapped in my thoughts I forget my surroundings. Then a snap, I look up to see everyones eyes on me, green, brown, and Luka's captivating blue ones. I feel as if I could stare at them forever and I do until another annoying snap. But this time it comes from Adrien instead of Alya. "S-sorry guys I'm a little out of it today, didnt get alot of sleep." I say as a quick cover story. I know why I'm acting like this and it's the fact that I met a certain blue-haired boy today, and he decided to take my breath away. "I'm just gonna head to the bathroom real quick before class. I'll see you in there. B-bye." Once in the bathroom I contemplate what is going on. My emotions are all out of whack and I feel weird. No time to think because that's the bell.
Ring Ring Ring
The rest of school goes by in a blur, everything I was supposed to remember is now forgotten except for blue. I rush out of the building as the final bell rings. I wait for Alya at the doors so we can say goodbye, but she had other plans. She insists that we go to my place and talk about today's events, just for the sake of my mental clarity. Once we are in my room she says spill, and everything comes rushing out. My feelings for Adrien are discussed, the new feelings about Luka and the way he made my body feel, and the attack. She checks to make sure I'm clean of my cuts. Alya is the only one I have ever trusted with this, she's the only one who knows. My trust in her is greater than any other that I have ever formed. Then my phone, a ring, and an unknown caller. Who could it be, should I answer?