Patreon has the nsfw/smut version of this chapter. The link is on my profile.
Not explaining this again
----
He was the butterfly that flew by but never landed.
In a garden full of them, he stood out. The views being graced by his presence though he would never land to let them view him.
With his personality being the colors that were so vibrantly loud, even brighter than the sun that graced us daily with its warmth.
He was a free spirit, no person even holding the capability to catch him. He couldn't be caught, couldn't be held down. Forever a mystery to the people who wanted to understand him, get to know him.
Maybe that's why I had been so attracted to him.
I was one of those bystanders who watched as he flew by, admiring his colors from afar. Having no reason to simply just watch but never finding the right time to make my move. I was curious.
Curious of his kind-- to what had been so special about this one specific butterfly.
Though he had been rare, I had felt a sense of relief around him.
Skipping over the cliches of being one of a kind though that might have been what he was. Everyone saw him fly but never taken in his beauty or passion.
Maybe he had been misunderstood.
Misunderstood for what others thought he was, not recognizing the point in his chosen values. His priorities were straight and because of that people found him too much of a hassle to catch.
They wouldn't waste a breath on getting him.
Though I had never been interested in butterflies an extreme amount, I became interested him in.
There was an understanding between me and this butterfly. One I didn't understand but wanted to. It was unordinary strange to me.
I hadn't been one to go after things. I had my eyes on myself, taking care of my own priorities and worries because no one else would.
But this time was different.
I was going to catch this butterfly.
---
Song for this chapter: Love Songs by Maggie Lindenmann (in the playlist or above).
"Why can't you use the fucking front door?" Bakugou yelled from his window. He had been staring down at me from the second floor, his room to be exact.
Carefully, I had been climbing the side of his house by using vines I'd expanded to be a ladder.
"Shhhh!" I hushed him, flailing around my free arm. "I'm not using the door because our moms talk and if yours finds out I'm here she'll tell mine." I attempted to whisper-scream as I climbed up the vines.
"You're an idiot." He mumbled under his breath. His hand was held up over me, using his quirk to shine light over me. He'd done it after I almost ate shit climbing up.
I know I'm so graceful.
I paused after hearing his comment and looked up. "Want me to turn around and leave? Because I will, asshole." I threatened, holding the vines tighter from frustration. My eyes squinted, glaring holes into his head.
He scowled back, his eyes rolling in the direction of the city glowing next to us. He reached down and aggressively pulled me up and up to his window. "I didn't say I wanted you to go."
I smirked, linking my hands behind his neck. "Look at you wanting me around. I guess I could get used to that." I shrugged acting sly.
His face turned smug yet he hadn't let me see since he'd turned his head. "Shut up." He said, another eye roll coming from him. I let go of my hands from around him and climbed through the windows entirely.
I looked around the room noticing it was cleaner than I'd expected.
"Nice room." I complimented as I walked by and sat on his bed. I laid back completely to feel my head hit something. I reached back and held up a manga. "Is this that romance series I made you read?"
He sped up to me and took it from me. "Stop touching shit." He shoved it into a drawer and slammed it shut. "Why'd you sneak out, huh?" He climbed onto the bed, sitting above me with his back against the headboard.
My face flattened.
For a few seconds with him, I'd forgotten everything. I'd just gotten here but during these few moments with him, everything felt okay.
I'd forgotten the betrayal that sat heavily on my shoulders, weighing down into what felt like my heart. I wouldn't even admit this with myself but it hurt to know that I'd officially lost one of the last pieces of family.
I have never been good at talking about my problems or explaining my emotions so most of the time I'd avoid them, creating what was probably even bigger problems in the end. I had only been adding fuel to the bigger fire that had been aching in my heart.
"Umm..." I looked up at the ceiling while my hands played with the buttons the oversized cardigan I threw on before leaving. "My mom basically said my kidnapping entirely my fault and nonexplicitly was trying to get me to leave."
I felt the bed shift.
"What the fuck? Seriously?" He asked, completely taken back. His hands grabbed me under my forearms and pulled me up to his lap where he laid my head. He could most likely feel the bothersome sadness in the tone of my voice.
Maybe he saw the scene replaying in my thoughts.
"Yup, I wish I was lying. All Might and Aizawa came to talk about the dorms and Aizawa apologized for having me taken under his watch and that's when she blamed it on me. Said I 'chose to follow her father'." I said using air quotes.
The entire situation was frustratingly exhausting.
"What'd they say?" His hand sat over mine, stroking it lightly with his thumb.
"Nothing. I mean what the fuck are they supposed to say? 'Oh yeah, your daughter loved being around a psychotic psychopath who treats her like a portable punching bag that's why she went?" I tried to imitate All Might's voice but it'd gone south. "No, but Aizawa tried to tell her something but she didn't listen."
"Senya? Ass wipe better have defended you." He scoffed, shaking his head. He, himself was beginning to grow a tad bit angry.
"Yeah, of course he did. He tried to tell her that I was trying to save you in exchange for my dad taking me but like I said, the lady was on some crazy shit. Turned into the human version of a migraine..." I played with the strings of his hoodie as I spoke, focusing on them to drown out my feelings. "It's not like I care anyway."
Once again, I was trying to avoid confronting them.
"Then why you sound upset about it?" He was trying to get me to open up, confess the feelings he knew I was suppressing to keep myself safe.
I sighed while grabbing his leg to hug, letting my head droop on it. "I guess I do care. You'd think that after going through so much shit she'd be more empathetic to especially me. I finally accepted the fact that people won't like me but when it's my mom, it's an entirely different story. I just thought she'd have my back."
I paused for a moment when I felt the waterline of my eyes string. I didn't want to cry-- I wasn't going to. In the end, I knew this would happen but not this soon.
I was better alone yet at the same time I was afraid of it.
"Thinking about it, she could have just been scared? I'm trying to come up with an excuse for her shit but honestly, I think it's bothering me too much for me to just brush aside. She called me broken." I paused at that thought and let out a pitiful chuckle. "I mean maybe she isn't wrong but like fuck man. It was just one of those things that you know but didn't want someone to point out. Sometimes I wish I could just eye-roll myself into the next dimension of this crappy world."
When I finished he stood quiet. My eyes roamed around the room waiting until I tilted my head to look back at him.
He looked back down at me, "Keep going."
"Keep going?"
"Keep fucking going with the story."
"No--"
"Y/n, I swear--"
"Fine, I guess." I sighed giving in. "I think that's where I really had a small breaking point within myself. I rhetorically asked her when I'd be able to breathe. I just feel like so much has gone on through my entire life and never once do I just have the chance to breathe. I haven't done shit to anyone yet it always ends up falling back on me. For a few seconds, I just want to feel something good. I probably don't make any sense."
"No." He said quickly after I finished. "I get it..."
His head was against the headboard, eyes looking up at the ceiling with thought, a mere daydream in his mind. The light reflected in his eyes creating a halo effect in their red pools. It had been one of the rare moments with him that he'd let me see the softer side of him.
Giving himself into what would be a vulnerable moment.
A moment where for a few minutes he'd uncover the weighted blanket that he'd use to protect his own self and especially his pride. Because he never wanted to be seen as weak or not worthy of being a threat in another person's eyes.
It reflected often in his actions.
But with me, he felt safe enough to let himself go.
"My hag did the same crap. Maybe not as shitty or like a madwoman. Said that if I hadn't been taken then we'd be outta this mess with the police and the school. She said I was weak." He explained, dazing into the wall in front of us.
His hands sat on my shoulders moving slightly as he spoke.
"I think her morals are right but the execution was a bit harsh. I'm sure you did try to stop yourself from being kidnapped." I was positive he did. I understood the factor of tough love but in the situation, I feel like it could have been too much.
I hoped it didn't get to his head.
"No, she's right." He shrugged. "There's nothin' I could do besides work harder to be better. I could have done something more, maybe even defeated some of those shitty wannabes myself. I'm gonna surpass all the heroes and show 'em that I will become number one with their help or not." He smirked minimally, nodding his head.
I grabbed his hand, pressing my lips against his knuckles. "I know you will. I'll be watching the entire way through and supporting you." He smiled but it started to fade.
"It's just I can't get this one damn thing out of my head..." His word seemed to faze out as he didn't finish the sentence. He seemed to be tripping over the idea of wanting to tell me.
"What is it?" I asked, moving my head to get a better look at him.
"Nothing, just drop it." He avoided eye contact with me, looking away.
"You know you could always come to me if you need to talk about something, right? I got your ass and you got mine. I won't let anyone know that you actually got a soft side." I joked. I could feel his light chuckle against the back of my head.
"I'll kill you if you do." He said attempting to make a threat yet instead made himself smile.
"Seriously though." I pulled myself to sit up and turned so I had been facing him. "When you think no one understands you, think that the world is against you, I'm here. Always-- even if we're miles away from each other I'll find a way to get to you."
It was an unofficial promise I'd established between us.
He stared at me for a while, stuck in his admiration for me that struck him.
He sighed, shaking his head as a slight smirk appeared to grow on his face. "You're a fucking dumbass." He grabbed my arm and pulled me into his chest where he wrapped his arms around me.
"I know. Remind me never to get gross and mushy again." I teased, wrapping my arms around his torso.
I could feel his heartbeat echoing against my ear that was pressed into his chest.
It was steady, maybe the calmest it had even been. Something about it made me feel more tranquil, easier to let go of my anxieties.
He was warm-- warmer than me as usual. The warmth from his chest provided an invisible barrier around us, making me feel protected.
Like nothing could ever hurt me again because he was there.
I looked up at him to find that he had already been looking down at me. His arms were around my shoulders holding me tightly, closely like if he had let go I'd just leave him. One hand left from around me and slowly reached to my cheek.
He kissed me delicately.
Being careful of my cracks and scratches but accepting them because he thought they were the best parts. They showed courage, an amount of strength that he had admired from me because for once he was able to say that something was stronger than him and he was proud of that.
Proud of me.
"We'd would be good together." He said, pulling away and showering my cheek with many smaller kisses. It made me laugh from the light tickling sensations.
"No, we wouldn't," I said through my giggles.
He stopped and retracted his face back to look at me. "Why the hell not?"
"I'd break your heart." I smiled, a tease in my voice as I curled his hair around my finger. Only if he knew what I meant.
His hand reached to my chin making me look into his eyes. "What if I break yours?"
I laughed again, "I'd like to see you try, candlestick."
"Then I guess we'll be the first to break each other's." He pulled my chin, creating contact between our lips.
Things began to escalate quickly. Each of us not wasting the time to express the emotion we deprived each other of because of the strong need we had to just feel something.
Our feelings were a mystery to us. A crime to our lives that would never be solved.
Words not being able to convey the feelings that were stuck in our minds but would never leave our mouths. The feelings feeling so complexed yet in reality they were our own that had yet to be tamed.
We had a special connection, something more than simple fate.
Our souls were crafted from the same mold, the same elements that were glued to our morals and stamped into our passionate hearts. no explanations were needed because with one look our feelings, thoughts, or emotions were spilled like a glass of water that had been tipped over a table.
And if a simple look was not enough, our actions filled in those gaps.
So here now, we were going to fill in the missing pieces to our puzzle and solve it until a new one came. We completed each other in ways no other person could.
And I adored that.
Through the process, he had been careful with me, gentle when he went in me but still keeping his aggressive roots. All of the deeply held passion that was on hold was not released in a matter of seconds.
It was one of those moments again where everything just felt right.