A/N:
Q: Why is Thor's brother never popular at parties?
A: Because he's too LOW-KEY
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
That was a cheesy joke in more ways than one.
🐦Clint's POV:
I had just come back from a mission in Italy. For safety reasons I wasn't allowed to bring my phone, so of course, the first thing I did when I got back to the tower was rush up to my room and check my phone.
"Holy ham sandwich!" I yelled.
I had over 100 missed texts from my group chat with Tony, Joker Blowtorch, and CGB. The chat was renamed to 'Weird nicknames chat' too, and there was also another person added to it.
"I was only gone two days!" I exclaimed.
*:･ﾟ✧ ~⭐️~✧ﾟ･: *
You
What'd I miss?
Joker Blowtorch
Do I sense a Hamilton reference?
You
Well yes, but I also wanna know what I missed
Who the heck is sTeEb?
sTeEb
my real name is Steve, you know me Clint
You
Oh!
Hey Steve!
sTeEb
Hello
CGB
If you really wanna know what you missed Archery Pigeon you should go read through the previous texts
You
Hey CGB!
Great idea!
Gimme five minutes!
(/◕ਉ◕)/ Five minutes later
I see you couldn't get them to tell you their location either
sTeEb
nope
but we got close to something
Joker Blowtorch
this close 🤏
but this far 🔭🌌
Metal Man
Why are you people always on your phones?
Do you even have a life?
You
Do you have a life
Metal Man
I will have you know I have a very important life, and an important job, that requires me not to be on my phone 24/7
You
Well I just got back from Italy so I'm taking a break
CGB
Did you say Italy?!?!
You
Yep
CGB
As in 🇮🇹
You
Yep
CGB
I love Italy!
Joker Blowtorch
That's cause you were born in Italy dumbo
Of course, you love it
sTeEb
You were born in Italy?
CGB
Yeah
You
Cool!
Metal Man
Okay, I have a meeting now, so I'm muting you all
You
Like you even go to those meetings anyways
'Metal Man' has muted this chat
You
🙄 He's so dramatic
CGB
Like my uncle
Joker Blowtorch
*Cue dramatic thunder in the background*
sTeEb
What?
CGB
Ignore him
Joker Blowtorch
What?
Do not ignore me!
Never ignore me!
I am the Supreme Commander of the Argo II and I refuse to be ignored!
You
Isn't the Argo that ship that Jason sailed on in that old Greek Myth thingy?
CGB
My father is not going to appreciate that
You
Oh, is your father one of those nerd geeks obsessed with mythology?
Joker Blowtorch
BAHAHAHAHAHA
CGB
Why are you wheezing on the floor?
Joker Blowtorch
I'm just imagining your dad as a geek and-
Omgs, I can't-
CGB
Pffft-
sTeEb
What's so funny?
Did I miss something?
Joker Blowtorch
No, it's just Nico's dad is scary
like super scary
like 'If-you-treat-my-son-wrong-I-will-kill-you-with-a-pair-of-chopsticks-and-hide-your-dead-body-in-a-violin-case' scary
You
. . .
I think CGB's dad would like my boss
Joker Blowtorch
OOOH!
Who's your boss?
You
That's classified
Joker Blowtorch
OOOH!
Am I texting a spyyyyyyy?
You
No
Joker Blowtorch
Don't worry, your secret is safe with me
I won't say a peep
Not even if someone temps me with peeps
Man, I love those marshmallow chicken things!
But they also have bunnies
I like the chicken ones though
I just think they're cuter
But if given the choice of no peep, or a bunny peep, I'd definitely choose a bunny peep
it would be a sad day if I turned down a peep
when you say peep a lot it doesn't sound like a word anymore
peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep,
see?
CGB
Leo, your ADHD is literally seeping through your texts
You
You have ADHD?
CGB
Yeah he does
I do too, but it's not as bad as repair boy's over there
Joker Blowtorch
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
sTeEb
What's wrong?
Are you okay?
Joker Blowtorch
Nooooooo
I'm really not 😭
You
What happened?
Did someone stab your arm again?
Joker Blowtorch
No
sTeEb
Then what happened?
Joker Blowtorch
MY BEST FRIENDS BETRAYED ME AND STOLE MY BOX OF DOUGHNUTS!
😭😭😭
You
Oh no!
I'm sorry, I know how that feels
rest in peace Leo's doughnuts
You will be missed
CGB
🙄
I knew Archery Pigeon and Leo meeting was a bad idea
sTeEb
okaaay?
So, on an unrelated topic, I know practically nothing about you two
CGB
So?
Ignorance is bliss
Joker Blowtorch
I like to build stuff, my hair is brown as are my eyes, I was born in Texas, but live at a camp in New York, I have to stay there all year because my mom is dead, and my dad was lost in a fire, I have an amazing girlfriend named Calypso, and my favorite color is orange
I also make the best tofu tacos in the world
sTeEb
Oh, nice.
Also, I'm sorry about your parents
Joker Blowtorch
Oh it's fine
CGB
Leo, you showed them pictures of me, so I'm gonna show them pictures of you
You
Ooooh yes!
I wanna know what Joker Blowtorch looks like!
CGB
And his girlfriend
You
Yesssss
Joker Blowtorch
Wait what?
CGB
Joker Blowtorch
Nicooooooo
You
Oh my god
first: you look like an elf (in a good way)
second: is that a dragon!?!
third: You and your girlfriend are super cute!
CGB
First: Yeah, he does look like an elf
Second: yes that is a dragon, he built it
third: yes, they really are, they're also super funny when Calypso is scolding Leo for lighting the kitchen on fire, it's hilarious
sTeEb
He lit the kitchen on fire!?!
Joker Blowtorch
Oh, many times
I'm good with a campfire, or mini stove, but microwaves are one thing that I just can't figure out, I mean, why can't it just cook dry food?
CGB
Because the dry food will burn
for a person with an IQ of 275, you sure are stupid
Joker Blowtorch
Nico, how could you say such a hurtful thing?
My heart is truly wounded 😢
You
YOUR CAMP IS IN NEW YORK!!!
Joker Blowtorch
What?
Nooooooooooooooooooooo
where would you get that idea?
You
"but live at a camp in New York"
Joker Blowtorch
oops. . .
CGB
LEOOOOOOO!!!
😡😡😡
Joker Blowtorch
Heh, heh, heh
sTeEb
Well, this narrows it down a lot
CGB
🤬🤬🤬
Joker Blowtorch
sorry. . .
CGB
Ugg!
I'm done!
don't bother me for the rest of the day
I'll be sleeping
You
Mood
but anyway, I gotta tell Tony
bye
Joker Blowtorch
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*:･ﾟ✧ ~⭐️~✧ﾟ･: *
A/N:
Okay, I think you already know what I'm gonna say.
Thanks for reading, and I hope you liked the chapter.
Byeeee,
-Sundew ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔ