March 1992
It's been just two years since Tom left Jump Street. Many officers have come and gone since then, but me, Judy, and Fuller have all stayed. Ioki moved on from the precinct a couple years ago, he met a girl and they moved to California. Doug left Jump Street in 1990 after his near-death experience so he could be there for Clavo, his nephew that he adopted from El Salvador. Even Judy doesn't take field assignments anymore, she usually stays at the chapel behind her desk. She destains it, but I think she enjoys helping to train the newbies.
I stopped taking high school cases last year and I began to focus on assignments based in colleges. I'm twenty-four years old, I cannot stand high school cases anymore so Fuller has only been giving me college assignments. Fuller wasn't very happy with me about it at first, but I think that nine years in high school is more than enough... six of them were spent undercover.
I wish I kept track of all my cases at Jump Street. This one that I was assigned to was textbook: infiltrate the dealers, find the supplier. I had the entire case memorized. I had to attend Trinity University, a private college a couple districts away. I was going in as Michelle Collins, a science prodigy who graduated from Jefferson High School. I've had this assignment a million times, it should have been easy.
It was my second or third day on the case, and there was one kid in a few of my classes that I recognized but I could not pinpoint how I knew him. I kept feeling his eyes on me, even though I tried to ignore him. Turns out, he recognized me too. I attended a high school with him nearly five years ago, and he was still pissed that I arrested one of his friends. He was a sophomore at the time, and an underclassman at this university now. He pulled me aside and threatened to tell everyone at the university that I was a cop.
I couldn't even finish out the rest of the school day with that hanging over my head. I made a quick call from the main office to one of my other team members to take over for me, and I marched out to my car. I was cursing under my breath as I drove straight to the chapel.
I ignored everyone in my anger and headed straight for Fuller's office. I gave him a couple knocks as a brief warning before I opened the door and found him talking on the phone while sitting in his chair.
He paused mid-sentence to whoever he was speaking with on the phone and looked up at me with an expression of both confusion and concern. He said into the receiver, "I'll have to call you back."
I paced the office and cracked my knuckles as I heard Fuller hang up the phone and stood up from his chair. He asked me, "what's going on?"
"I was recognized. Again," I huffed. I stopped pacing and continued, "that's the third time this month."
Fuller exhaled slowly and rubbed the back of his neck. He asked, "what about the assignment?"
"I got McCann to cover for me," I said. I took a breath to calm myself down, but I was upset. Every time this happens, I'm kicked off the case and assigned a new one.
"That's good. He hasn't worked in that district yet so he's a fresher face," Fuller nodded.
"I'm becoming too well known throughout the districts. The students all know me as the cop who busted them... or their friends... or their siblings. What should I do?" I asked defeatedly.
"What do you think you should do?" Fuller asked.
I slumped down in the chair and bit the inside of my cheek. I had been thinking about this for a while, but I didn't like the conclusion that I always came up with. I exhaled softly before I mustered up the courage to say it. "I think I should resign from Jump Street."
Fuller sighed and said, "I was afraid you'd say that. I don't want to lose you."
"If you keep having to replace me, I'll become a risk to the entire operation," I stated.
Fuller nodded in agreement. He said, "let's put you behind a desk for the time being. We will figure this out. You've already taken the detective test, right?"
"Yeah," I said anxiously, my bouncing knee giving that indication. "I'm just waiting to hear for my results."
"Don't worry about it. Right now, I want you to go home and get some rest. You've earned it. If your results come in today, I'll give you a ring."
"Will do, Cap'n. Thank you," I said and stood up. I left his office and saw Joey was standing by the water fountain. Being nosy, he asked what happened.
Joey Penhall is Doug's younger brother, who basically took Doug's spot after he left Jump Street. Sometimes I accidentally call him Doug because they look so similar. But Joey has longer, almost blonde hair which is a great contrast to Doug's short dark hair.
I gave Joey the run down of my entire morning and he said, "shoot. Hopefully you get it figured out."
I sighed, "yeah, me too. I'll see you later, Joe."
"See you," he said.
I walked out to my car and began my drive home. I looked out the window as I drove, and it was hard for me to drive past the places that Tom and I used to go, because all I saw was the ghosts of our younger selves playing in the field with Swayze, or walking down the street hand in hand. It's been two long years since he left, and I wonder if I ever crossed Tom's mind, because he crosses mine all the time.
I finally got home and huddled on the couch with a blanket over myself. I turned the television on and contemplated what I wanted to do with my career. This was such a difficult decision I had to make for myself, and I didn't have the motivation to make it.
Swayze slowly climbed up onto the couch and laid his block-head down on my hip. I scratched behind his fluffy ears and he tried to lick my hand.
In a giddy little voice, I sang to Swayze as I always love to do. If he didn't love me unconditionally, he would probably hate it and get annoyed. But he was my little ball of sunshine, and I reminded him every day.
"You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are gray
You'll never know, dear
How much I love you
Please don't take
My sunshine away."
I got distracted by a glare that was attempting to blind me from a picture frame that was hanging from my wall. I tilted my head slightly so I was out of the glare and smiled to myself when I saw the picture. It was of me and Tom when we went on a hike right before he left. It was one of our last photos together. I wished we could relive those golden days. Now, those photographs are the only way I can hold him until our eyes meet. I won't ever let him go, all I can do now is wait for him to come home.
I stared at my landline, hoping that Tom would call. I know he is busy, but it seems like I call him much more than he calls me. I don't want to annoy him. We used to call all the time, but in the past few months it's been very scarce. We are always busy at different times, and we never get the timing right. A flashback of when he told me, "forever and always", flashed through my mind. It's been raining in my mind ever since he left, and I needed him.
I could still recall all the good times we had together. The loved we shared, as well as the fun and the laughter. I wished he could feel what my heart wanted him to know: I missed him, and I wish he was home with me. I could almost hear a knock at the door, and all I wanted was him to be on the other side. But if he loved me, why did he leave me?
If I looked at any corner of the apartment, I could see memories of us passing. I could still hear the sound of his laughter fill the air, like bells on Christmas morning. I longed for the touch of his hand holding mine.
We are only getting older, and I've been thinking about how different everything in my life is, and it drives me absolutely crazy. My young romance with Tom is now nothing more than an embedded memory. I should have nothing to be afraid of, but the concept of time truly terrifies me.
I glanced out the window and admired the pale moonlight. I was comforted by the fact that Tom and I were under the same big sky and that he was somewhere out there. I am suffering under this long distance. When will this yearning for him ever end?
The phone rang and I was still under my spell and thought it was Tom. I quickly answered it and brought the phone up to my ear, "it's Gregg."
"Hey, Mick, it's Doug."
"Hey, Doug. How's it going?" I asked him. I haven't seen him much since he left Jump Street because he spends a lot of his time with Clavo. He had a near death experience that scared all of us, but Doug was afraid of putting his life in danger everyday and risk leaving Clavo alone. He's terrified to leave Clavo.
"I was calling to let you know that I am moving to Virginia." He got straight to the point, and the information hit me like a truck.
"What?! Why?!" I nearly shouted. I immediately sat up straight and jumped to my feet.
"The DEA offered me a position to work alongside Tom. I'm taking Clavo with me."
"What?!" I nearly yelled into the phone.
"The benefits are great, and I have some family in Virginia so it works."
I was almost speechless. I really didn't want Doug to leave me too. He helped me get through Tom's absence, in turn made us bond. Who am I going to turn to now? Booker?!
I sighed into the phone and slowly sunk back to the couch. I asked, "when do you have to be there?"
"Next month. They didn't give me much notice."
"I assume that you won't be able to leave for ten years either?" I asked and Swayze put his head back on my lap.
"You assume correct."
"This isn't fair," I complained.
"I know."
"Well, if this is what you want to do then I'm happy for you," I said with a sigh. I didn't want Doug to abandon me in Metro, but if he was going to feel more fulfilled in Virginia, then that is where he should be. I am not one to stomp on the dreams of others, even if I may want to.
"Thanks, Mick," he said, "I gotta go, I'm picking up Clavo from soccer practice. I'll talk to you later, okay?"
"Okay, bye."
"Bye."
As soon as we hung up, my phone began ringing again. I brought the phone back to my ear and said with a less cheery tone, "Gregg."
"It's Fuller, I've got your detective results here," he said.
"You do?" I asked and sat up a little straighter in anticipation.
"Yeah, you want me to put it on your desk?"
The suspense if I passed the detective test or not was killing me, but I really didn't want to drive all the way back to the chapel. My thumb nail found my teeth and I began knawing at it. I asked Fuller, "can you open it for me, please?"
"I don't think I should," Fuller said.
I couldn't stand it anymore. I said, "open it, please. I won't tell if you don't."
Fuller quietly chuckled and said, "all right, give me a moment."
I heard him place the receiver on the desk with a soft thud and he opened the envelop with a swift cut. My heart was beating out of my chest as I heard him pick the phone back up and say, "congratulations, Detective. You passed!"
"I passed?!" I shouted and jumped up to my feet. The cord went taut and nearly flew the base of my telephone off the table.
He chuckled, "you passed!"
"Wow, this is great!" I laughed with relief and glee. "Oh, thank you so much."
"I'm happy for you, Gregg. What are you going to do now?" He asked.
My joy died down when I had to remember that I had to figure out what I wanted to do moving forward. I twirled the curly cord of my telephone around my finger and decided to turn my brain off and let my mouth run free. I said, "Fuller... I'm putting in my two weeks."
Fuller sighed, "all right, Mick. I'll put in a transfer for you to go up to the Metro Police Department right now."
"Thank you," I said to him. Despite just quitting one of the best jobs I've ever had, I couldn't stop smiling.
"No, thank you, Detective. Congratulations."
We hung up and I turned to Swayze, the only other living thing in the apartment, and freaked him out with a happy squeal that escaped my lips. I had worked undercover at Jump Street for seven years, since 1985. I was ready for a change, and I was beyond thrilled to have been promoted.
This fork stuck in the middle of the road provided a valuable lesson that I learned in time. I made the best out of this test, and even though it was unpredictable, in the end it is the right decision for me. I will forever have the still frames and memories, that I will hang on a shelf in my mind.
I jumped back on the couch, landing on my stomach, and grabbed the phone from the side table in front of me and dialed Tom's number to give him the good news. I kicked my legs up as I waited for him to pick up.
I only had to wait for a couple of rings before he answered, "Hanson residence."
"Hey, it's Mickey," I said. I wondered if he could sense the smile that made its home on my face. "I'm not catching you at a bad time, am I?"
"No, of course not. I always have time for you," he said.
I blushed and twirled my finger around the cord again like a giddy schoolgirl. He always made me feel so young, and he makes the world just melt away. I said, "guess who passed the detectives test?"
"Hmm... Big Bird?"
I giggled and said in a sing-song voice, "nope. Guess again."
He thought for a moment before he asked in a serious voice, "E.T.?"
"Nope." I popped the p.
"Oh, I know. Yoda."
"Try again, you will," I chuckled. I love hearing the sound of his voice.
"Axel Foley," he said.
"Closer," I said.
"You?"
"Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner," I giggled into the phone.
"Wow, that's my girl! I told you that you would be a shoo-in." I could hear the enthusiastic tone in his voice. He was truly happy for me.
"Thank you," I blushed.
"As your first act as detective, what are you going to do?"
"Resign from Jump Street," I told him.
"You did?" He sounded surprised.
"Uh-huh, I already told Fuller. It was a split-second decision, but I'm glad I did it. I really am sad to leave, but for what it's worth, it was worth all the while."
"I hope you had the time of your life."
I smiled gently, almost forgetting that he couldn't see me. "I did."
This was the craziest job I have ever had in my entire life. This crazy, wonderful, empowering job. I put my life on the line so many times, I have had a thousand different identities, and I have learned so much through this job. Even though sometimes it made me go insane, I really do owe everything to Jenko and this job. Without it, I never would have met Tom. Without Tom, I don't think I ever would have been this happy.
"Are you going to come work for the DEA?" Tom asked hopefully.
I fake laughed, "aha, no."
"Worth a shot."
"I heard that Doug is going to work for the DEA."
"Yeah, he joins next month. He's gonna be my new partner. What are the odds?"
"That's crazy. I bet you guys are excited to work together again."
"We are, but I'd be happier if it was you."
I yawned and said, "I know. All right, I'm going to let you go. I just wanted you to be the first to know about my status at Metro P.D."
"Congratulations again, Detective. I'm so incredibly proud of you, darling. I'll see you when I get home."
"I'll see you soon," I said and hung up.
Every time we say goodbye, I feel like I die a little. I miss him terribly, but he has always been one call away. Why did I ever let him go?
I let out a soft squeal as I rolled over on my back and looked up at the ceiling. I was supportive with Tom's next chapter of his life, and it warmed my heart that he was supportive with mine. Now, it is my time to take chances and find my own wings. Whatever happens, I know that Tom will be there waiting for me. He only is one phone call away.
Talking to Tom elevated my happiness, and I was satisfied. Now, we just have to wait eight more years before we can see each other again.