"What the fuck is this" Draco put down the device that was described as an "iPhone" and sat back in his forest green armchair stunned, Harry Potter on the other hand awkwardly took a seat on the emerald coloured velvet sofa vertical to his enemy.
"I know right it's so cute isnt it!" Gushed Agnes Footbean (who is not an original character or a self insert) "everyone in the muggle world is OBSESSED with Drarry it's wonderful isn't it?".
Draco gulped and timidly glanced at Harry who was holding his face in the palm of his hand, "look Agnes, I don't want to burst your bubble but I- we need you to understand, me and Malfoy are not attracted to each-other, honestly we despise one another" explained Harry his face a deep crimson after reading the absolute garbage that was previously presented to him.
"Yeah enemies to lovers, you read the fanfiction right?"
"Agnes."
"Come on guys, you have to acknowledge your feelings for each other eventually"
"Look, Potter is straight alright he has a girlfriend, I'm bi but I would never be seen having a friendly conversation with him, it won't work out either way, I'm sorry but you need to delete that- whatever you called it cause quite frankly it's inappropriate and disgusting".
Agnes pouted "aw come on guys you're ruining the fantasy, why did I bother shifting here if you guys were just gonna be straight and genuinely hate each-other ugh".
"What the fuck is shifting"
"Basically I'm from another dimension and when I think really hard I can move in between fantasy worlds and live a double life"
"Isn't that just lucid dreaming or having an active imagination?" Asked Draco "wait are you implying we are just a part of her imagination" said Harry, they turned to Agnes a look of existential dread painting their faces.
"Oh my god are we not real"
"Wait are my memories fake oh my god holy shit"
Agnes' face paled, this wasn't part of her plan "guys wait no that's not it everything is real it's just in my head!".
"No wait no this can't be true, this explains so much, the gaps in my memory, my father forgetting my birthday holy shit I don't exist" Draco teared up "Harry we don't exist everything we know and believe in is fake it's just made up".
"Wait did you make my parents die? Why would you do that it's so fucked I've lived with this guilt and trauma for seventeen years and it didn't even happen why the fuck would you do this you're an actual psychopath, did my parents even exist in the first place?"
"Fuck it" said Agnes as she opened her eyes and woke up, I hate it when they gain sentience she thought as she made her way to the kitchen for a glass of water, I'll try again later.
The end
Written by glxyblu (he/him)
Authors Note
This isn't my return to wattpad this is me making fun of shifting ur all fucking weird