A week later ......
Sierra
" See this is not okay" I said taking a seat on the couch catching my breath.
I can't even stand up for five minutes without not feeling tired.
" Yo ass finna have them babies"
" Boy hush don't remind me" I said shaking my head.
I rub my stomach again feeling another contraction.
There weren't too serious that I wasn't able to move or anything like that.
I stared at Khalil as he was helping me with my baby bags.
They could be here any moment as the doctor put it.
After the conversation me and Julian had nothing has really been talked about between us.
The fact that my heart still ache for his attention is beyond me.
Sometimes I can't even go to sleep without him popping in my head.
But I knew it will never happen and I had to accept that.
He made it very clear.
for the second time.
" you thinking about him ain't you"
I quickly looked at him seeing his face.
" I'm sorry Khalil" I said looking down.
" Sierra it's okay ma, he's gone realize later that you are a good woman" he said pinching my cheek.
Last week Khalil decided to call me up and confess the feelings he had for me.
It was honestly too much for me, but he's really a good guy.
Sadly I didn't have the same for him. My heart still was attach to a jackass who honestly doesn't know what he wants.
I just knew after that he probably wouldn't want to see me anymore, but he didn't.
As the days get closer he's been more than a big help than Ju has been these last days.
Apparently he was always swamped in work. It's been a minute since Ki-Ki stopped at my place with me.
I knew he was dropping her off over to his mom place, so I would go over there and spend sometime.
" Thanks"
" Imma put these in the car" He said holding up the bags.
I nodded my head.
Another sharp pain shot through me making me wince a little.
" Y'all must be ready to see mommy" I said rubbing my stomach.
"I'm ready to see y'all too" I said.
Since I was already tired I closed my eyes dozing off.
Julian
" It seems like you be here how more than the damn office bossman" Tracy said taking a seat by me.
I listen as she put her drink order in.
A lot of shit was on my mind. For the first time in my life I felt lost.
" Julian"
" yea" I said drinking the rest of brown liqour in my glass.
" I'm concerned about you Brodie"
" I'm good" I said checking my phone for any messages from my mom since she had Ki-Ki.
" It's about Sierra ain't it"
I closed my eyes trying to remove her from my thoughts.
" poor tink tink you better be thinking of nothing stupid man"
I let out a sigh of frustration.
" I don't know"
" what you mean"
" she's a good person and I -" I stopped myself.
I refuse to go down that road again.
"Ohhhh ... I seee, you think she's another Jade ??" She leaning in her chair next to me.
As I much I try not to admit I couldn't get her out my head she was all I thought about and it was driving me crazy.
It was fear that was stopping me.
From loving her.
These past few months Sierra is not the girl I picture her out to be especially showing up in my office with a 2 month belly you couldn't miss it cause it has twins in it.
She's been a big help with Kianna. Jade didn't really like my family like that so I would have definitely been on my own figuring out stuff for my baby girl.
" I don't know what to do" I said sipping the rest of liquor in the glass.
" I suggest you go in your car drive ...... maybe Uber to Sierra place and be there for her like you should be Julian, she can't be doing this alone"
She was right.
" Listen you need to be honest with yourself and with her don't miss out on something that could be the best thing for you Julian and I mean that"
" okay"
" might of fact I'll just take you to your house, drinking and driving is a no go"
" I'm good" I said waving her off.
" Um sir I'm pretty sure you consumed more than the standard amount for driving"
" how you make all this money with no damn driver"
I smacked my teeth at her as I got in her car.
25 minutes later......
I was back at my place taking a quick shower and sobering up before leaving out again.
Just when I was getting comfortable my phone ringed.
" hey ma" I said
" boy why your behind ain't at Sierra place"
Ok so everybody on my case today.
" I've-"
" Julian don't make me come through this phone on you Boy"
" Mama you didn't let me finish" I said sitting on my bed.
She stayed quiet over the phone.
" I've been doing some thinking . . . . I want to be there for her and I'm not just talking taking care of the kids"
" oh I know that honey but makesure that's what you really want to do. You don't need any to be making anymore mistakes when it come to her"
" you understand me?"
" yes mama" I said while nodding my head like she could see me.
" Go get your woman baby boy"
I can hear the smile in her voice.
Once I was off the phone with her I finally grabbed me some clothes to wear.
I quickly slid them on while thinking about how the conversation was going to go between me and Sierra.
As I think about me and her I really have done some regretful shit to her.
I jogged down the stairs in the garage where my other car was parked at.
After the shower I had sober up.
I started the engine getting a call from Ms. Tanya, Sierra's mom.
I answered it knowing it's about Sierra and the twins.
The sniffling on the other end threw me off.
" Heyyy is everything okay"
My heart was pounding heavily knowing this wasn't going to be good.
" You need to get to the hospital ASAP"
I quickly put my car in reverse leaving the parking spot.
The worse shit was going through my mind.
Narrator
Inside the hospital, Mal, Ices, Sierra parents and Khalil all waited in the hospital.
Hours earlier, Khalil was at the house with her when she started having serious contractions after her nap.
They quickly packed the car with all the twins stuff. A anxious Sierra held on to her stomach as they were on their way to the hospital.
" Where is my phone I need to call J-"
A cherry red Mercedes Benz smash into Khalil Silver Jaguar at a traffic light leaving Sierra unconscious on impact and the twins life in sudden danger.
The cherry red Benz disappeared from the scene before anyone could see it.
A bystander end up calling for help.
Back at the hospital the family were waiting for the doctor to hear any updates.
Julian on the other end shook nervously walking through the double doors.
He looked around till he spotted everyone.
Tanya quickly saw the distress young man going up to him.
He instantly start to questioned wanting to know if her and the babies were okay.
Just when she was about to respond. A white man in a white coat came out greeting the family.
" how are my babies doc"
The doctor looked around at the hopeful faces knowing he had to deliver the good and bad news.
Three weeks later ......
12 in the morning ......
Sierra
Why me ?
I hated myself for letting this happen. The sound of my son cries took me out my thoughts.
Thankfully I was already up.
" I uh think he's hungry again" I said to a sleepy Julian.
I slowly got out of bed heading to Sincere room.
I carefully picked him up for him to latch on to my boob. Gotta say it's been kind of hard with this breastfeeding thing.
I stared at my beautiful son, who look almost identical to Julian. It wasn't no denying him.
Sincere Jay Westbrook was his name. Yes I gave him Julian middle name.
I liked it.
" You need me to do anything" Julian said with his tired red eyes leaning on the door.
" No but you can go back to bed, you've been a big help" I said to him.
" Nah imma sit right here" he said taking a seat by me. It was another chair in Sincere room.
I rolled my eyes at him. I must say Julian has stepped up a whole lot. Since being at the hospital with all the complications that has happen, he has been here for me. I would of thought work would have his attention with all the stuff we been through before his arrival.
" Julian it's okay I know you tired you been up all day with him while I rest and I appreciate that"
He waved me off.
" I'm good" he said while staring at Sincere.
I just knew he was going to spoil this boy. Every since the hospital he wouldn't let him sleep in his own crib. Eventually his mama had to step in.
" Does that hurt" he said pointed to me feeding Sincere.
" not really, I think I'm getting use to it" I said smiling a little.
" it's crazy how he's been in me for 9 months, 39 weeks and comes out looking like you"
All Julian did was laugh.
" hey man I can't help he got his daddy genes, I'm pretty sure our baby girl would've looked liked you"
I closed my eyes thinking of the trauma of losing her.
Julian saw my face.
" Sierra I'm sorry about bringing that up"
" it's fine" I said clearing my throat.
" by the way I'm having someone investigate that" he said
" for what Julian ? ..... they already said the cameras didn't work"
" my baby girl is gone because of them someone is going to pay for it"
I decided not to say nothing giving that I already know his mind was made up.
10:00 in the morning.....
Julian
" My grandson is sooo adorable" I heard my mother say.
I realize I was laying on the couch. The smell of bacon and eggs hit my nose.
" Good morning sleepy head"
I slowly got up stretching my limbs.
" Now I know I suppose to be giving yall space for the baby and all but you know I can't help myself, so I made some breakfast for you and Sierra"
" Which is good" Sierra said with a mouth full.
Yea my mamas throw down in the kitchen for all meals of the day.
" Well it's greatly appreciated mama" I said while kissing her forehead fixing me a plate.
I looked down seeing Sincere wide a awake.
" Wassup twin" I said touching his cheek.
" I hope he hasn't been giving y'all any trouble like this man"
" Now mama you know I was a good baby" I said looking at her.
" Boy please, your butt use to holla bout anything"
Me and Sierra both laughed at my mom.
" I think it's time to go change his diaper I'll be back" Sierra said holding Sincere.
I watched as she walked all the way to her bedroom.
" I guess imma be getting that second grand baby sometime soon"
I turn my head sooo quickly.
" Mama I think we good with just him"
" Have you told her"
" Told her what ?" I said confuse.
She shooked her head.
" Remember what we talked about before everything went down" she said giving me a look
I thought about it.
" mama ion know" I said eating a piece of bacon.
" boy bye you love that girl, I know you do, the way you watched her walk all the way to that bedroom door."
" Mama we haven't even known each other for that long "
" Sweetie love doesnt have a ti-"
" time nor a place" I said finishing her sentence.
" Well I see someone been listening to their grandma" She said smiling.
Mama J always spit real facts to me. She probably would have been elated to see Sincere.